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Ryan Palmeter
This page is a gem.
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Ryan Palmeter is yet another mediocre mass shooting article. You can help by not writing articles on every boring edgelord that goes postal and reminding the author they aren't AlGore. |
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please click here and slowly scroll down to the bottom of the page. |
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| Ryan Palmeter | |
| Born | November 28, 2001 |
| Died | August 26, 2023 (aged 21) |
| Nationality: | Americunt 
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| Highscore | Killed 3 |
| Top 50? | Fuck no lol |
| Style | FPS, Single player |
| An Hero? | Yes |
| Motive | Total Nigger Death |
Ryan Christopher Palmeter卐 was a 21-year-old alcoholic, suicidal crybaby, college dropout, and CIA asset from Jacksonville, Florida who sacrificed his life to continue the work of his idol Brenton Tarrant in removing the Fried Chicken Filth from the South. Having grown up in a place called "Oakville Plantation," he had experienced his fair share of gangbangs and assrapes from niggers, and decided to get revenge on the darkies with an AR-15 on August 26, 2023.
Palmeter boasted a history of mental illness and had previously been involuntarily institutionalized in 2017 for an emergency mental health evaluation following a threat to yeet himself from the roof of a building.
The Attack
Palmeter had planned to go postal at Edward Waters University, a school in Jacksonville with a historically black student body and staff, but he was approached by a security guard while lurking near the campus library and then asked to leave after he refused to identify himself. Palmeter retreated to his car, where he was seen equipping a ballistics vest and mask. Security was alerted again and attempted to confront him once more, but he drove away before he could be accosted.
With his grand plans apparently thwarted, he set his sights on a shitty little Dollar General of all places instead. He shot and killed one nigger in her car in the parking lot, and then another nigger who was stealing merchandise inside. Two more niggers walked in while the shooting was going on, at whom Palmeter opened fire but only killed one, leaving the other completely unscathed. Finally, he called his daddy to tell him how to find his multiple manifestos and then turned his gun on himself before he could get raped by the cops and then later by Bubba.
Manifestos
Ryan wrote three manifestos because of course he fucking did, the first detailed his mission that he descriptively titled "Total Nigger Death," which was supposed to include even honorary negroes like Eminem and Machine Gun Kelly. He expressed admiration for such killers as the Oklahoma City bomber and his yellow fever for the Virginia Tech shooter but admonished the Boogaloo Boys as larpers because they are cowards who have not actually committed murder. The second one was made for feds. Finally, the third one was made for mum n’ dad.
Paradoxically, his writings indicated a positive opinion of black Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, whom he admired as having "interpret(ed) laws based on the Constitution instead of doing faggy activist shit like the last half-century's worth of Supreme Court Justices."
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A White Boy Summer to Remember
(Click link to read)
Lulzy Highlights
—Q: "Do you really think people will follow you?" | ||
Ryan Palmeter's manifesto was overall a comprehensively written and informative manifesto, but there were a few moments were his inner-troll shined. On Jan. 22, 2025 however, his lulz factor would be undone by Solomon Henderson in his own manifesto, which though much less comprehensible (which can be attributed to his nigger mentality), certainly made up for it in its unprecedented level of lulz. This article is about Ryan Palmeter however, so please view his lulzy highlights below.
- TND
First and foremost; Total Nigger Death- a policy which he brings up frequently, and at one point brings up the entire copypasta in the Q&A section. Secondly, there is the namesake of his manifesto, A White Boy Summer to Remember, "White Boy Summer" being another one of /pol/'s pastimes. Additionally, Ryan ends his manifesto with "And above everything else: Make this a White Boy Summer to remember."
- Shrek is Love, Shrek is Life
Ryan namedrops some random bitch and sites her as being the only person to possess a lulzy photo of himself wearing a Shrek costume while performing a nazi solute and professes his wishes for it to be uncovered for everyone to lol at. This is probably the most important piece of lost media involving this shooter.
—List of people and companies I feel like name-dropping | ||
- Get-Out-Of-TND-Free Card
In his list of people and companies he feels like name-dropping, Ryan introduces the Get-Out-Of-TND-Free Card, which he bestows upon Justice Clarence Thomas, whom he admires as an honorary nigger. Thereafter, Ryan offers a Get-Out-Of-TND-Free Card to all future TND enactors who participate before TND goes mainstream, which they may bestow upon one minority of their choosing, except if said minority is some dumb nigger musician in which case it may be vetoed by the next mass shooter who chooses to ignore the ticket upon presentation and chooses to kill the dumb nigger anyways. e.i. the TND pass has very little tangible value.
Soysphere Involvement
His gun writings and manifesto are both full of Sharty lingo, right down to including a 
Characters Reacting To Sad Breaking News meme featuring Chudjak that was 
stolen from some random Twitter user.
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This led many to believe that he was a soyteen, something that was later confirmed once his Steam account was discovered.
It was only a matter of time before the bald cartoon man site got its own shooter, but at least he's not as embarrassing as ours.
Reactions
As the shooting took place in Florida where 12 out of 10 locals supported bringing back slavery, there wasn't much butthurt from the media, but of course Old Joe had to give another unoriginal reaction to the shooting, this time saying "white supremacy has no place in America". Ron DeSantis called Palmeter a pussy for becoming an hero, being fully aware that a lifetime of buttsecks with Bubba was not a better option. Of course, some butthurt niggas didn't like Ronnie's statement, and even booed him off stage when he attended a vigil to pretend he gave a shit about the victims.
Loadout
| Failed Payton Gendron | |
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| Item | Accessories/Bonus |
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Graded Score
| Kill count: | 3/20 Not much of a loss for the state's cotton production. |
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| Accuracy: | 2/20 Chased some bitch around the store and still couldn't get the kill. |
| Style: | 14/20 Tactical vest and Nazi shit scribbled on his AR-15. |
| Butthurt: | 7/20 Got the media to blame the governor somehow. |
| Bonus: | 5/20 Caused minor butthurt in Florida but otherwise insignificant. |
Wanted Level:
Mall Cop
See Also
- Dylann Roof
- Epic Fail
- Fatass
- Florida
- Meth
- Nazi
- Niggers
- Patrick Crusius - Part one of the shopping trilogy.
- Payton Gendron - Part two of the shopping trilogy.
- Redneck
- Solomon Henderson - The second confirmed Sharty shooter.
- Soyjak.party
- White Supremacy
External Links
TOW coverage
Soyjak.wiki coverage
Billybobsatan
His YouTube channel back when it was named "Imonlytenlol" - YTPMVs and MLP videos can be seen in his favorites, if you needed more proof of how terminally online this guy was.
CaseyAnthony
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Ryan Palmeter |
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| Ryan Palmeter is part of a series on Dying Alone
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| Ryan Palmeter is part of a series on National Socialists Click topics to expand | |
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Schutzstaffel 卐 Ideologie, Tradition, Praxis, und Stolz 卐 Möchtegern-Nazis 卐 Feinde, Verräter, und verboten |
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