Rule 34
—Rule 34 |
The oft-cited observation from lore, Rule 34 has been proven beyond even the faintest doubts by fetishists, furries, infantilists, childhood-destroyers, and other horndogs in general, which is why it's proudly featured on brain-raping websites such as 4chan, 7chan, and Encyclopedia Dramatica.
On the most basic level, Rule 34 is the pornographic manifestation of even the most fucked up things imaginable as it states that "If It Exists, There Is Porn of It", thus the most important thing to understanding it is that it is never breakable (which is why Rule 34 is seemingly the only Rule of the Internet to actually apply). Instances can be real but usually range between hentai drawings by weeaboos or Photoshopped images. To facilitate your learning of the rule, we at ED shall take the liberty of breaking it down based on the quality, difficulty to find, and legitimacy of the pornography:
Variations
Type 1: Superb pornography
If you've been on the internet long enough, you know that specific characters, franchises, and even entire mediums are only popular because they offer plenty of fanservice, so it's no surprise that there's more pornography made of said things than there is made of others. So out of all that porn made, the quality of some of it ends up exceeding the quality of the thing it's based on, resulting in what we see here.
Note: Porn of this category is ironically the farthest thing from Rule 34, as Rule 34 states quantity not quality.
Type 2: Typical porn
Not all pornography is of an orgasmic quality; instead, most of it falls under this category. It's not the best, but by far is it the easiest to find. Go on any shitty porn site and we bet you'll find some.
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The Dovahkiin's true relationship with dragons
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Fucking watermarks
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The Esurance company has been doing great since their newest commercial
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Erin of Esurance naked and ready for action
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Guess where the Yu-Gi-Oh cards are in this picture
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WHAT A WONDERFUL KIND OF DAY
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Gaston teaches Belle something she can't learn from a book
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Fucking furries
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Kids will get their childhood raped plus a boner from this.
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Orcs
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Never mind that 99% of Godzilla monsters are male, let's give them big tits and make them have lesbian sex
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Ron, it's been far too long since the last time you fucked me in the ass!!
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Gay furry porn.
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Dilbert solidly inside the box
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This bitch is ugly and there is still porn of her
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Typical Mortal Kombat friendship
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The Blues Brothers
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I like asses!
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"In a world of chaos & disarray, it's brother & sister that fuck all day!"
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Juggalo porn, fantastic
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Tabula Rasa before the shutdown
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Chewy
Type 3: Shitty porn
Since stupid things tend to become part of internet culture, them being 34'd is only natural. Unfortunately, the people who 34 them are the same unfunny, untalented idiots who popularized them in the first place (ex: Alexreynard, Chris-chan, DBoyWheeler, Eric W. Schwartz, Neomorphasis, Ray Jones, ReZ, and Urd-chan), thus here we have badly-done porn made of shit nobody cares about.
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This entire gallery summed up in one image
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Delicious butter
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That's not milk
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But what about Naomi?
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Putting those holes to some good use
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Get your blocks off!
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Just because you forgot it exists doesn't mean it's exempt.
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Same goes for things you never even heard of.
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Toy Smurfs
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There are no exceptions; even to shitty fighting games
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One of the guys from Lemon party is bisexual
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Translation: Garfield! Go back to bed!
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It was only a matter of time before they clashed.
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Why Shenzi is the leader of the 3
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A scene from sweet lil Bindi Irwin's new childrens cartoon on PBS
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I'll butter your popping corn...
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Even the shittiest band in the world isn't exempt
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Yes. An actual E.T. porn spoof actually exists.
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PUDDI
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Vince vs. Billy Mays
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Anne Coulter,Larry Craig,and Michael Savage
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Never doubt it, faggots
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New Pokémon from Diamond and Pearl!
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How Asterix got the golden sword
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36 seconds. How long it takes to reply to your own pic.
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Colonel's secret recipe
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What you didn't see during Dylan and Eric's school shooting
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That'll shut him up
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Pawning off to some chess
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In Canada, milk cums in bags
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Don't feed it after midnight!
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Rule 34 applies to stores too
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Remember to brush your teeth! Good luck trying after seeing this.
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It's the cheesiest!
Type 4: The essence of Rule 34
Although porn of this category is undoubtedly the most difficult to find and it's not like any person would want to masturbate to it, it inflicts the impact that Rule 34 has on the internet. This category's level of sick fuckery and WTF makes it the pornography equivalent of shock sites as it bring much lulz at the dispense of other's brick shitting. Finding these requires great amounts of searching backwater porn sites and possibly several bumps of a thread but it's worth the shock value.
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It was only a matter of time before coprophiles found out about Cowboy Bebop
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Fish. In his anus.
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Stuff like this makes Atimon horny
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Nothing can compare with Scooby's ass
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Anita Sarkeesian's character from Towerfall.
Type 5: Instant Rule 34
On 10/08/08, a /b/tard decided to end all difficulties associated with Rule 34 on any subject thus created a template consisting of a penis, a mouth, and some semen. This instantly became popular with /b/ due to the fact that simply pasting it onto any image and moving it to juxtapose correctly would instantly 34 it. Threads exploded with never-before-seen Rule 34s of memes and, within moments, 10/08/08 became known as MEME RAEP Day.
Rule 34 lost a lot of value by the insane overuse of this simple, witless, hack, which did to Rule 34 what "Lolcats" did to "Caturday". Being of the worst quality, yet exploitable, this even made some think that perhaps there shouldn't be porn of some things. For the sake of not creating a category for every type of Shop, all shitty Photoshopped images that can be considered "porn" will fall under this one.
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Instant Rule 34: Now there is no excuse
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Your happy meal will never be the same again (though still every bit as mushy and salty)
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Not even the members of ED's former regime are safe
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GayDiamond
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Kevin Perera buttplug
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Fuck Uncyclopedia
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Annoying Orange getting what he deserves
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Looks convincing.
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ALL YOUR MEMES ARE BELONG TO RULE 34
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Secret's out, Jacko
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Rule 34 IRL
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The Victorians certainly were a stolid bunch.
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Bullet Time Effects!
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Take that Wikipedia admins
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Will it fly?
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Billie Joe Armstrong fucking Dr. Chase
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You're right, Spock, that's not a phaser.
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16 year old girl. Does it really need Rule 34?
Childhood Ruined
See also
- Rules Of The Internet
- Fetish
- Porn
- Providers
- Shadman[1]: The West's response to Japanese hentai
- Aerisdies[2]: Most mediocre hentai site in existence
- ImageFap[3]: See The Great ImageFap Troll
- Paheal[4]: ImageFap is
betterinferior - Palcomix[5]: WWOEC spinoff
- WWOEC[6]: Biggest cesspool of pedophiles on the internet
- Rule34.xxx[7]: Superior tagging, removes loli and shotacon.
External links
Rule 34 is part of a series on Visit the Memes Portal for complete coverage. |
Rule 34 is part of a series on Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage. |
Rule 34 is part of a series on Visit the Anime Portal for complete coverage. |
Featured article June 16 & June 17, 2011 | ||
Preceded by Dominique Strauss-Kahn |
Rule 34 | Succeeded by Plushie |