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BECAUSE MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS LOUD

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Can you hold your breath as long as Kanye?

May 13, 2009. The day means many things to many people but for noted self-hating Aryan supremacist Kanye West, it was the day that he basically cried that TEH INTERNETZ R MEYN 2 ME. West got epic butthurt by a bunch of users of the narcissism sinkhole known as Twitter who were registering with his name to spout their self-indulgent word vomit. He closed his massive hissy fit with the following words: "TAKE THE SO CALLED KANYE WEST TWITTER DOWN NOW .... WHY? ... BECAUSE MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS LOUD" Powerful words, Mr West. Some argue that Kanye is a genius, but does he truly comprehend the internet?

We don't think so.

Everyone who isn't you knows that the internet's primary purpose is to let socially maladjusted losers impersonate anyone they damn well please. Kanye would know this if he spent less time having tantrums on stage and ripping off dead daredevil's ideas.

   
 
SORRY I COULDN'T HEAR YOU OVER ALL THIS SPAM COULD YOU TYPE A LITTLE LOUDER PLEASE?.
 

 
 

You

Kanye's Blog Entry

Kanye's motivational poster, probably

File:Kanye west.jpg

HIS CAPS LOCK APOLOGY IS LOUD

This spaz comes courtesy of losers making fake Kanye West Twitter accounts - I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING TWITTER... WHY WOULD I USE TWITTER??? I ONLY BLOG 5 PERCENT OF WHAT I'M UP TO IN THE FIRST PLACE. I'M ACTUALLY SLOW DELIVERING CONTENT BECAUSE I'M TOO BUSY ACTUALLY BUSY BEING CREATIVE MOST OF THE TIME AND IF I'M NOT AND I'M JUST LAYING ON A BEACH I WOULDN'T TELL THE WORLD. EVERYTHING THAT TWITTER OFFERS I NEED LESS OF. THE PEOPLE AT TWITTER KNOW I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING TWITTER SO FOR THEM TO ALLOW SOMEONE TO POSE AS ME AND ACCUMULATE OVER A MILLION NAMES IS IRRESPONSIBLE AND DECEITFUL TO THERE FAITHFUL USERS. REPEAT... THE HEADS OF TWITTER KNEW I DIDN'T HAVE A TWITTER AND THEY HAVE TO KNOW WHICH ACCOUNTS HAVE HIGH ACTIVITY ON THEM. IT'S A FUCKING FARCE AND IT MAKES ME QUESTION WHAT OTHER SO CALLED CELEBRITY TWITTERS ARE ACTUALLY REAL OR FAKE. HEY TWITTER, TAKE THE SO CALLED KANYE WEST TWITTER DOWN NOW .... WHY? ... BECAUSE MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS LOUD!!!!!!!!! [1]

Possible Reasons Why His Caps Lock Was Loud

This man's caps lock is not loud.
  • He struck the keys forcefully, with righteous rapper rage.
  • He's Kanye West, the greatest creative mind of his generation. You would not understand because you are not Kanye West, the greatest creative mind of his generation.
  • Frustrated with keyboard-spazzing all his lyrics into caps, Kanye installed a sonic emitter on his caps-key to alert him when his pinkie (the greatest, most creative pinkie of his generation) drifted towards it. The sonic emitter is powered by the force of his own misjudged importance.
  • He is a puffin's quim.
  • Because George Bush doesn't care about black people
  • Kanye West's first love was a lowercase e, which left him for... I don't know, that other rapper. The white one. Kanye West was so incensed by the actions of this heartbreaking letter that his untempered anger was focused into the only available receptacle - impotent capitalization on teh internetz.
  • He is a Gay Fish.
  • Because CAPS LOCK is the best keyboard key of all time. OF ALL TIME!

Irony

Over the last few months, mostly during the Summer of 2010, Kanye West has been using  a Twitter account as a means of saying random, nonsensical USI shit. In fact, some of the things he has posted on said Twatter abomination have been so crazy and lame, they're actually funny (as per the Rules of Lulz). So there really is no moral or merit to any of the previous article anymore, as Kanye has just proven that once again, with enough motivation, every retarded celebrity has a voice to share on social media.

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