MonkeyGameGuides


MonkeyGameGuides
Born	12th December 1997
Nationality	British
Current Residence	London, Great Britan
Occupation	~~Youtuber~~Terrible Game Reviewer
Alias(s)	MonkeyGameGuides, MonkeyGayGuy, Monk Monk, Mathew or Thomas

MonkeyGameGuides (AKA 'Thomas' or 'Monk Monk') is a strange cockney 27-year old British kid that has the voice of a truck-stop hooker or London rapist. MonkeyGameGuides is an infamous game reviewer with who seems to review generally popular video games, but then compares it with games like Call of Duty or other such mediocre action games, which seem to attract hundreds of people come to watch his stupid videos and get extremely butt-hurt over them. Whenever people seem to argue against, or point out MonkeyGameGuides flaws, MonkeyGameGuides will threaten to 'declare war on them or add them to his 'hate list'

Also note his fucking disgusting rotten yellow British teeth.

The Beginning

MonkeyGameGuides first started his long run of reviewing folks with a video entitles as "Borderlands SUCKS!" where of course, he insults the game for having cartoonish and bad graphics. He repeatedly compared it with the FPS, Call Of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. The following day, he uploaded a video where he continued making shitty reviews, this time pissing off Bioware fanboys. In both these videos he does the same thing, compares them to Call Of Duty and calls them shit for small and pointless reasons. Throughout the videos, he talks with a quite voice, he smiles and laughs at his own jokes, and he looks to the sides to make sure his parents aren't in the room to hear their failed abortion say such retarded and unfunny things.

The Start of is Infamy

MonkeyGameGuides got his first taste of internet infamy when Rocco from Mega64 favorited one of his videos. This sent a crowd of unfunny 13-year-old boys and manchildren rushing to his page to spout their unfunny inside jokes about this 'skit'. Regardless, the sudden vitalization of his video brought much attention in for MonkeyGameGuides. Many new people started following his videos. This caused MonkeyGameGuides (by unpopular demand) to make more videos. These videos being entitled "Sly RaCOON SUCKS" and "Fable III SUCKS" (Fable III sucks was later taken down by high demand of butthurt) Both of these videos introduced his strange new cockney accent. These two videos later on attracted the attention of local Oblivion fanboy who went on a long foolish argument to try and prove MonkeyGameGuides wrong, the fanboy later on, invited his daddy, ThePs2God who would later become a rival to the infamous aspie, MonkeyGameGuides.

The War

This saga of MonkeyGameGuides was an event where the local manchild 'ThePs2God' (AKA OneManBoxOffice) an unemployed fat man decided he had nothing better to do but point out flaws in a petty kid that no one even cared about. (except of course for the 13-year-old boys) OneManBoxOffice made a commentary on MonkeyGameGuides after his furfag buddy also made a commentary. Both commentaries featured them both trying to be pretentious and smart. MonkeyGameGuides latermade a video declaring war with ThePs2God which soon gained the attention of the local crowd of 13-year-old boys whom then latched their mouths to ThePs2Gods anus.

The war featured many pointless arguments between the two and a few commentaries and videos between the two. Soon, ThePs2god realized the truth. That he'd been wasting his time on a pointless subject with a petty obscure-ish kid (as he was very obscure at that time) who's opinion was invalid and irrelevant and was only bringing more attention to the kid. ThePs2God ended the war realizing how stupid he looked, but being the egotistical person he is, he claimed to have won the war because 'He's smarter then everyone else' (He literally was saying that, no joke) MonkeyGameGuides later made his own victory video were he to claimed to have won the war. In the end, it turned out to be a petty little argument between a petty kid and a manchild ctbOSJ2nax0

Other Major Conflicts

Although the war had ended, many conflicts between 'ThePs2God' and MonkeyGameGuides continued. Soon in near-mid 2012, ThePs2God's account was terminated by the local lolcow, RJBandsma. MonkeyGameGuides in joy created a video about it. Later that week, it turned out 'Osama-Bin BoxOffice' (as Monk Monk) had created a new account called "OneManBoxOffice". MonkeyGameGuides began harassing OneManBoxOffice for weeks. OneManBoxOffice continued to be the same pretentious, egotistical manchild he was by arguing back and pointing out flaws in MonkeyGameGuides maturity and attitude. Eventually OneManBoxOffice finally gave up and just began to ignore and block MonkeyGameGuides.

This silence didn't last for long. OneManBoxOffice shot a crippling blow at MonkeyGameGuides when he came back as a complete hypocrite and flagged the fuck out of a bunch of his videos. This caused MonkeyGameGuides to be on the verge of suspension and gave him a one-month ban from Youtube. In a response, MonkeyGameGuides persuaded a young kid OneManBoxOffice was harassing known as 'Rickey Feima' into flagging all of OneManBoxOffices videos for harassment. This ended up working very well on OneManBoxOffice. After that, months remained with silence. Until November. In November, MonkeyGameGuides became very viral. As a response, MonkeyGameGuides heavily referenced his victory over OneManBoxOffice to threaten his new haters. It wasn't long before these babby detectives tracked down OneManBoxOffice and began asking him about MonkeyGameGuides. OneManBoxOffice being smart, claimed that he'd do nothing. In reality, he actually decided to once again go on a flagging rampage. This once again led to another monthly ban for MonkeyGameGuides.

Later on, the tables turned ending the 'war' for good. OneManBoxOffice's account received two copyright strike. Because of the last strike MonkeyGameGuides gave him earlier, this caused OneManBoxOffice to be terminated meaning he once again had to start again. MonkeyGameGuides had obtained victory. OneManBoxOffice did make another account known as 'OneManBoxOffice2' although after loosing his account twice, OneManBoxOffice decided that Youtube wasn't worth his time anymore.

To this day, many people have made commentaries or videos pointing out his flaws. He even became the first person for a now popular Youtuber known as 'CuteFuzzyWeasel' to do a commentary on.

Arrow In The Knee saga

After a long two month break from Youtube, MonkeyGameGuides returned with a video that made him viral. Before the release of Skyrim, MonkeyGameGuides decided that with the upcoming release of Skyrim's and the hype that surrounded it, that he should share his opinions on what he thought about Oblivion. He used his hatred towards Oblivion to say 'why' Skyrim 'will' suck (which he ended up being right about it) In this video, he comes up with a true analysis for TES IV: Oblivion's story. His summary was pretty much that Patrick Stewart comes to visit to tell you about his wet dream, then he kills himself leaving you to fight an army of 'gooby monsters' because an old guy and Sean Bean told you to. This led to a massive out-cry from Skyrim fans causing this video to get to 70,000 views within two weeks. MonkeyGameGuides became infamous within the Elder Scrolls community. It wasn't long before babby's and little kids plagued MonkeyGameGuides videos, to stupid to analyze how fake the videos were. The comment section became plagued with kids spouting unfunny 'Arrow In The Knee' jokes and other unfunny The Elder Scrolls jokes and... 'memes'.

MonkeyGameGuides realized next to Skyrim, Minecraft also has the most autistic fanbase. MonkeyGameGuides a week after achieving nothing but hate from the league of [faggots]], he decided to strike back by doing a review on another game that has a huge fanbase of aspiesMinecraft. Once again, this caused a complete uproar between the little aspies and autists that plague the Minecraft community. MonkeyGameGuides who couldn't take the hate from over 1000 annoying aspies, later made a video entitled "Go Away Haters!" where he complained about people criticizing his stupid videos, and pointing out his flaws. Once again, he threatened to declare war on them. After a month break, MonkeyGameGuides having actually bought Skyrim (or he just watched a playthrough on Youtube), he made a 'proper' review on Skyrim. which was of course PAINFULLY UNFUNNY (and cringe worthy.) He also decided to call copyrights as Skyrim copied several aspects of the lore from Star Wars.

The War 2.0

Eventually being unable to take the constant heat of being a lolcow, MonkeyGameGuides delivered his promise from "Go Away Haters!" and decided to declare war on ALL of his haters. (No joke). He also begs for supporters and begins to take the whole thing seriously. In the video he talks about "dying gloriously on the battlefield" with generic Hans Zimmer music playing in the background. The video also contains clips from World War 2. He also claims the war will be remembered throughout history. Throughout the video, it is quite clear Monk Monk things he sounds smart, edgy or cool when in reality, he sounds like an aspie and is just embarrassing himself completely. He also has a sign-up system where you can sign-up for his war on his side or 'The Republic Retard Army.' Many people along for the lolcow ride join his side, meanwhile many stupid people openly say "Sign me up to the REPUBLIC RETARD ARMY" making themselves literally retarded. Despite MonkeyGameGuides efforts to try and push the war, it hasn't really done anything to affect his haters, and infact, it has given his haters to use something against him. (That being the fact that there is a higher number of people in the Republic Retard Army.)

Today

MonkeyGameGuides still continues to do terrible and childish reviews on video games. Threatening to declare war on people who dislike his videos, and just having a general grumble about things he doesn't like. But outside of that, nothing has happened... at all.