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David Carradine

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The man himself.


The last film David was to shoot.
Hangcock in Bangkok.
DO IT FAGGOT!
Zombie Carradine explains his actions.

On June 4, 2009, David Carradine was found dead in his room at the Swissotel Nai Lert Park Hotel on Wireless Road, near Sukhumvit, in central Bangkok, Thailand. Yes, ironically enough he died in BangKOK with a murder set up to look like death by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Carradine was in Bangkok to shoot his latest movie, Stretch, but the film crew were unaware of his absence when they went to dine out at a restaurant on June 3. Authorities are baffled why he had to resort to masturbation in Thailand with the abudance of tranny hookers there.

A police official said Carradine was found hanging by a rope in the room's closet. If you examine the photo you'll see that there's red lingerie on the bed. Rumor has it that while choking the chicken, the chicken choked back. The report later stated that a note was found at the scene, saying, "My fishnet pantyhose are like a cheap hotel: no ballroom.

In addition to being a famous fake Chink, David was also a noted drug user, and former alcoholic. He also tried to impregnant his 4th wife with his son or brother's sperm and committed serial wincest, which is why he was murdered. Carradine's representative and family members told the press that they believed the death to be accidental and not a suicide.

Not an hero

Well evidence eventually surfaced in June 2009, that it was not a suicide, making him ineligible for The Golden iPod Award. The reason being that not only was he tied up and suffocated, but both his hands were tied behind his back. Thus, either a shemale hooker in the city of Bangkok did it during sex (there are no female hookers in Bangkok) or it was premeditated murder. But of course since autoerotic asphixiation staged to look like a suicide is a common way of murder, we all know it was murder.

Cool Story Bro but he was a bad actor



Quotes

   
 
Master, why do you call me "grasshopper"?
 

 
 

—David Carradine

   
 
Because you ugly, like insect.
 

 
 

—The Master

   
 
What is the sound of one hand fapping?
 

 
 

—Kwai Chang Caine

   
 
Asshopper, you will be missed.
 

 
 

See Also

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David Carradine is part of a series on Dying Alone

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