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Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto
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Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto is an Epic Lolcow One page alone is not enough... A-Log's fellow circle-jerking aspie pals now have their own page! Why not read A-Log's fanfiction, too? |
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This person has Assburgers Syndrome, so you can't say anything bad! :-( Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck. |
—AustralatinaArchive, commenting on A-Log's YouTube channel | ||
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| Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto | |
|---|---|
 | |
| Powerword: | Anthony LoGatto |
| Nationality: | American |
| Gender: | Male |
| Occupation: | YouTuber, comedian, voice actor, Neckbeard |
| Years active: | 2008-present |
| Website: | JewTube channel TwitFace profile dedicated to his voice acting "career" |
In a place such as the Internet, which is filled with faggotry of all stripes - adult babies, scatmunchers, Internet tough guys, autists, furries - it might be easy to dismiss Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto 
as just another unfunny nerd on YouTube.
However, sadly, as with many things on the Internet, closer inspection reveals the true extent of his faggotry.
For, you see, A-Log , as he likes to call himself, is a fat, neckbearded, weeaboo maggot attempting to grow even fatter by feasting on the scraps of the bloated, rotting corpse of infamous Internet lolcow, Christian Weston Chandler.
Followers of the antics of Chris-chan have long noted a recurring trend of faggots, freaks and aspies attempting to 'redeem' themselves in the eyes of the trolling community by pantomiming disgust and hatred of the manchild's activities and perhaps spare themselves the trolling which, as they recognize all too plainly, would be theirs but for the fortuity of circumstance.
Anthony LoGatto is no exception.
Videos
—Chris Pickles | ||
A-Log's modus operandi is similar to that of many other basement-dwelling losers looking to score some easy prestige on YouTube - take a pure, unsullied slice of delicious lulzy goodness, in this case, one of Chris-chan's videos, then proceed to piss all over everything that was once beautiful and good by providing a 'hilarious' commentary on it, inflicting his terminally unfunny and boring observations and opinions on his captive YouTube audience.
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A-Log, like many of his kind before him, buys into the fallacy that if the original clip was funny, that by interspersing his own comments, he can make himself appear funnier and wittier than he actually is by piggybacking upon the humor inherent in the clip.
While, in rare circumstances, adherents of this strategy can, for a time, prevail before the stench of fail and AIDS surrounding them becomes obvious, a fat, charmless turd like A-Log stands no chance of ever achieving this and the e-fame he clearly longs for.
A-Log's videos are unremarkable and often boring and, as such, nobody has yet been able to sit through one of them in their entirety. However, even after a casual viewing, it will become apparent that they are nothing more than your typical nerd rant, filled with unfunny jokes and overused pop culture references, interspersed with either reaction images taken from cartoons that he is way out of the appropriate age bracket to be watching and gay anime that nobody gives a shit about or, alternatively, footage of A-Log sitting in his mom's basement, looking like a pudgy, unwashed pedophile, with the lights turned down low to try and obscure the room's contents and make the fact that he is an unemployed man approaching thirty, still living with his mom, making videos about losers on the Internet seem less pathetic.
Indeed, A-Log's videos might easily be ignored, were it not for his main choice of target: Christian Weston Chandler.
In this video, a clearly aroused and envious A-Log watches Chris-chan have sex with a blow-up doll.
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For, you see, A-Log is that peculiar kind of person who doesn't understand Chris-Chan, despite pretending to, and becomes obsessed with the woemanbaby because what he really wants is someone to point at, so that other people know that there's someone worse than him out there.
In A-Log's eyes, Chris-chan is not a dopey, childishly naive oaf whose buffoonish antics bring joy to the Internetz, but a hideous monster and the embodiment of all the evils of the world, guilty of the heinous and unforgivable crime of 'giving autistics a bad name'.
The fact that A-Log himself might have have his own numerous and obvious weaknesses and failings, many of them identical to Chris-chan, is immaterial because, to him, Chris represents a foul stain on the reputation of the grorious nation of Aspergia and, in his mind, A-Log is just the man to wipe it clean.
What A-Log fails to realize, however, is that the only reason he has for viewing Chris in this way is the fact that, on some subconscious level, he recognizes that he and the big CWC have so much in common.
—Urban Dictionary, telling it like it is. | ||
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}}
A-Log constantly talks about how worthless and stupid Chris is, never hesitating to inform his audience, in great detail, of just what an awful human being Christian Weston Chandler is, in a way typical of the kind of people who are just a few trolls away from being Chris-chan themselves.
He is forever making comments about how much better than Chris-chan he is and often punctuates his videos with phrases such as "And people think I'M a freak!", "Even I'M smarter than Chris-chan!", "And people think I watch too much porn!" and "Even I could do better!" while seemingly being unaware as to what this implies about him. Indeed, one might catch a precious sparkling glimmer of unintentional humor in one of A-Log's tedious, rambling videos when he'll say something utterly fucking moronic, proving how truly ignorant he is, or otherwise display a shocking lack of self-awareness by revealing a little too much information about himself and his personal habits.
A-Log's first commentary on Chris-chan was in August of 2009 on the infamous video of Chris humping his PS3, which contained over nine minutes of A-Log making fun of Chris' dick size. Since then, A-Log had mentioned quite a few times his wish to physically harm Chris. A-Log has also stated that he wished Chris would either be sent to jail for bogus crimes or be sent to a mental hospital in a straitjacket. Classy guy that he is, A-Log has even said that Chris should an hero.
A-Log is also known to keep track of any updates to Chris' phone number. He stated in a couple of videos his intentions on calling Chris, possibly hoping that he would get a recording of the manchild to add to his YouTube channel. A-Log has called Chris-chan at least once and recorded Chris' voicemail message.
Before A-Log started getting regularly trolled, numerous people tried, unsuccessfully, to get A-Log to stop his faggotry and leave Chris alone. The first known person was A-Log's own sister. However, A-Log just laughed it off and posted a caption on one of his videos where he stated "Fuck that!"
Later, A-Log was contacted by two trolls claiming to be Clyde Cash and BlueSpike. In a display of gullibility highly reminiscent of Christian Weston Chandler himself, he instantly believed them based on nothing more than their word, as trolls are generally a truthful sort, not at all known for their duplicity or willingness to decieve, who have nevar been known to use false names or identities. These two managed to rustle A-Log's jimmies enough to scare him away from making Chris-chan videos for a while, prompting him to make this video in which he claimed that he would no longer be making any commentaries about the Internet's poster boy for autism. The A-Log story could have ended there, however, unsurprisingly, A-Log didn't keep his word and, in typical lolcow fashion, was back to making an ass of himself on YouTube within a month, having learned nothing from his brush with the trolls.
Popular consensus among longtime followers of both Chris-chan and A-Log's retarded flailings on the Internet is that if A-Log were trolled to the extent that Chris was, he would be in much the same position as the esteemed Mayor of Cwcville.
Know that you can help in this endeavor, gentle reader.
—Anonymous /cwc/fag. | ||
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Ultimately, however, even setting aside the fact that he and Christian Weston Chandler are so much alike, much of the loathing A-Log recieves stems from the fact that he's somewhat akin to the Know Your Meme of Chris-chan trolling - like the greedy Jew that he is, he seeks to use Chris-chan as a means to promote his own shitty stand-up, radio and acting ambitions and profit from something he, himself, doesn't understand, nor have the balls to partake in.
Stand-Up Comedy Career
While A-Log's troll shielding YouTube videos are fail in its purest form, they might, on their own, be a forgivable offense attributed to an unfunny newfag and, thus, forgotten. After all, there are plenty of faggots making shitty videos on YouTube.
However, A-Log's greatest crime unto comedy is his ill-favored foray into the world of stand-up, which takes the winning premise of his YouTube videos, namely, mocking Chris-Chan and picking apart his every fault while simultaneously remaining blissfully unaware of his own numerous failings, and applies it to the concept of live stand-up comedy. Those of you with even a cursory knowledge of comedy traditions will already be able to see precisely why, by putting this plan into practice, A-Log will fall flat on his fat ass.
A-Log, however - either supremely overconfident of his comedic abilities or noticing a gap in the market for fat, virgin retards mocking other fat, virgin retards - didn't let this stop him and stormed (well, waddled) onstage at his local open mic night to treat the assembled audience to his hilarious observations about a series of videos on the Internet that nobody in the venue except him had seen. It went about as well as could be expected.
A-Log later uploaded this video to YouTube, but later removed it due to butthurt after trolls stated how utterly awful it was.
Below we have another example of A-Log's stand-up fail. Those of you with weak constitutions may wish to skip this video as it is so bad, so execrably awful, so painful to watch that it makes the Pain Series pale in comparison.
This stand-up comedy appearance was at the Emporium sports bar on Staten Island on New Year's Eve, 2009, as part of a contest to win $300. Unsurprisingly, he did not win.
—Anonymous, upon viewing this video. | ||
Furfaggotry, Robofaggotry And Other Assorted Sickfuckery
—A-Log, art critic. | ||
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As well as his shitty YouTube rant videos and his stand-up that is more tragedy than comedy, A-Log's activity on deviantArt and other sites also reveals that he is a flaming furfag, attracted to species from all walks of the animal kingdom, including elephants, dogs, bears, pigs, ducks and even toads, as can be seen here...
—A-Log, on an anthropomorphic Battletoad. | ||
Indeed, a few of his YouTube videos even feature artwork of A-Log's fursona, a red fox who is, ironically in typical furfag fashion, noticeably a lot thinner than the real, human A-Log, wearing A-Log's glasses, leather jacket and trademark gay fat guy hat that he wears in most of his videos and stand-up performances in a misguided attempt at looking cool and covering up his bald spot.
It is also very telling that 99.5% of A-Log's favorites on deviantArt depict highly sexualized interpretations of female cartoon characters in various states of undress. No doubt that this collection also doubles as A-Log's fapfuel.
However, it would seem that A-Log's perverted appetites are not restricted solely to the furry, the feathered and the scaly, as he is also the founding member of 'teen-robot-club' on deviantArt, a fanclub dedicated to My Life As A Teenage Robot, a children's cartoon show cancelled in 2007 due to unpopularity. A-Log has a particular perverse fondness for Vexus, the main villain from the show, and to date, A-Log has produced numerous works of fanfiction about his mechanical waifu, as well as his original character Trinako and various other characters from the show.
—A-Log on one of his many My Life As A Teenage Robot fanfics. Note that, so far, THIS IS THE ONLY CHAPTER WITH NO SEX WHATSOEVER. | ||
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The character of Vexus was voiced by singer and actress, Eartha Kitt, and when the raspy-voiced old negress died in 2008, A-Log produced the following video - a very tasteful, touching YouTube tribute to the woman who voiced the children's cartoon character he'd had countless sweaty fap sessions over.
As of 2017, A-Log is currently working on a shitty voice dub for a shitty fan comic based off the shitty Nick show. Anything to keep them crappy ol' cartoons alive
- "Well, first-off, I notice that he has, like, the Playboy fold-out of Marge Simpson in the background. Is he still trying to tell us, again, that he's straight? Besides, I have a lot better, uh, pictures of Marge Simpson, y'know, lookin' sexy and in the nude myself. On sites like the WWOEC and in my personal collection."
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A-Log is also a prolific poster on that wretched hive of scum and furfaggotry, WWOEC, where he can regularly be found bothering various furry fanartists with requests for Rule 34, often of the most obscure, forgettable, one time characters. Also notable is A-Log's rather dubious interest in straight shotacon - Chris Hansen would doubtless be interested in sitting down with him and asking a couple of questions.
A-Log visits the WWOEC Forums every day and has over 500 posts to his name at the present time, achieving the noble rank of 'Legend' - an enviable title amongst those who fap to cartoon characters. When he was getting trolled, A-Log attempted to use the WWOEC forums as a hugbox, but since the only thing people go there for is badly drawn cartoon porn, nobody really cared.
A-Log is also a member of the social group 'Toon MILF Fans' on the WWOEC Forums.
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OMG! Enjoy the metal MILFiness, u guise!!1 -
Moar robofaggotry. -
OH GOD, WHAT THE FUCK
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No, A-Log. D'you know why? Because you're the only one who remembers that. -
A-Log <3 Knuckles' Mom. -
A-Log <3 Knuckles' Mom, Part II. Also, lol sentence structure fail. -
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D'oh! -
A-Log passing comment on an image depicting Marge Simpson being sodomized by her son, Bart, in a church.
He better be careful... -
A series of private messages between A-Log and a female forum member that show our hero being the most beta man alive. -
A-Log talking to one of his best pals from WWOEC and fellow pathetic pervert, Usako Man Z. -
WHAT A TWEEEEEEEEST. -
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"Sorry, guys, let me rephrase that - Loli is wrong because they don't have tits." -
Proof that A-Log has never been to a regular porn site. -
A-Log, posting in a shota thread, because he is a pedofork. -
Rather than read it online for free, A-Log wants to support official shotacon incest manga by buying the English release. -
A-Log discovers that there are animated shotacon movies online. "Oh boy! Time to fap!" -
A-Log is sure to set people straight about exactly what species his fursona is. -
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A-Log on crime and punishment and how the only thing in the world that has standards is the porn industry. -
When A-Log discovered his ED page, it came as no surprise that he turned to his hugbox on the WWOEC Forums to soothe his poor, ravaged anus. -
A-Log continues to whine about the trolls.
UPDATE: A-Log's newest masturbatory idol appears to be Peacock, one of the playable characters from that crappy 2-D fighting game that nobody likes, Skullgirls.
He has made several posts about her on the WWOEC Forums and claims to be replacing his usual gay Lucky Star reaction images that he uses in his videos and commentaries with some from Peacock, instead. However, since A-Log is currently hiding from the trolls and hasn't made any new videos for the best part of a year, this has yet to be seen.
A-Log's Fanfiction
As is perhaps unsurprising for a fat, socially awkward nerd with no job, no girlfriend, no friends and no obligation to leave his bedroom who wastes his life watching children's cartoon shows, A-Log is also an avid writer of crappy fanfiction.
Most of it is posted on his FanFiction.net account and his deviantArt page, including 'What Have We Learned?', his especially lulzy story about the 9/11 terrorist attacks, as told through the eyes of various cartoon characters including Dick Dastardly and SpongeBob SquarePants. No, srsly...
A-Log's magnum opus, however, is his series of 'erotic' fanfiction, The World's Luckiest Guy - which he has produced a prodigious amount of.
These stories are TL;DR self-inserts, featuring amazingly weird, awkward dialogue which would sound out of place even in the most poorly acted of porn films, in which A-Log's Mary Sue fursona yiffs his way through various unrealistically appreciative porn stars, actresses, cartoon mother figures, anthropomorphic mother figures and other cartoon characters with his trademark six-inch foxdick. The earlier stories in the series have a screenplay style format, complete with stage directions, while the later instalments switch to a more traditional, third person narrative.
The earliest story in this series dates from the year 2002, indicating that even in his teenage years, a time when most people are out socializing, trying new things and losing their virginities, A-Log was still a sad, forever alone social outcast who spent his time alone in his bedroom fapping over cartoon dogs. On July 11th, 2012, the final chapter of The World's Luckiest Guy was discovered by trolls and was nothing short of an orgy of furfags and faggots.
In the spirit of this series of horror, and the ineptitude of the author, in October 2011, A-Log composed a marathon run of fapfiction in celebration of the Halloween season.
—A-Log on his new thirty-one chapter long fapfic | ||
This soon-to-be classic bible of erotic literature has A-Log's fursona yiffing the likes of Elvira: Mistress Of The Dark, Mewtwo, Rouge the Bat, assorted mother figures and his own ORIGINAL CHARACTER DO NOT STEAL Nina Quacketta - an anthropomorphic duck policewoman among others.
By reading just a few of these, the most tolerant and depraved fappers can notice many recurring trends and personality flaws. Here are just a few, so you can be spared from the horror.
- The stories have the same basic pattern of fucking: A-Log gropes/hits on the woman, A-Log sucks on the woman's tits, A-Log gets an erection, the woman is marveled by his 'massive six-inch penis', blowjob, titjob, doggy-style, another random position, then back to doggy-style. Then A-Log pulls out and jizzes on woman. After A-Log cums, the sex abruptly ends. He doesn't seem to understand or care about female pleasure. In every story he cums, but his companions often don't.
- The stories are completely unrealistic and unrelatable compared to any IRL social communication. The only thing the stories revolve around is Anthony having ridiculous amounts of sex for no good reason, The 'scenes' Anthony tries to create are based on his mutated version of what he's seen in porn, and as a result, A-Log comes off as being completely out of touch with reality (as he probably is).
- Heaps upon heaps of ego stroking, self-aggrandizement and exaggeration to the point where narcissism becomes transparent. This leads to things like A-Log describing his body type as 'normal and average', when just by looking at the guy, you can see that that is most certainly not the case. The most obvious example of this is A-Log constantly referring to his 'six-inch foxdick' in a tone and context that suggests that A-Log considers six inches (a rather average size for a man's penis) to be incredibly large and impressive. From this, and given that exaggeration about the size of one's genitalia tends to be a hallmark of bad self-insert fanfiction, we can infer that IRL, A-Log's penis is probably much smaller than this,
- A shocking lack of self-awareness and knowing when to shut the fuck up, which often leads to A-Log divulging amusing and potentially embarrassing personal information about himself without realizing it.
- Random, quirky 'jokes' for comic relief.
- Constant comparisons and references to other men, Similar to Chris when he writes other people into his story, the only difference is that A-Log uses Shadow the Hedgehog, Peter Griffin, etc., indicating not only that A-Log is deeply insecure about his own sexual inexperience and his
potentialdefinite inability to satisfy a woman sexually, but that he can only really get off by being informed of how superior he is to other men, usually those in positions of power and authority. A classic sexual fantasy of beta-as-fuck losers, dreaming of power because they know, deep down, that they are powerless. - Stilted, awkward social interactions indicative of someone who has never actually talked to a woman IRL.
- References to a healthy, fertile sperm supply, which seems to imply that A-Log has hidden fears about his potency.
- Women are often maternal figures, sometimes married.
- Sex usually only lasts for an hour in A-Log's fapfiction - even in his fantasies he's a one-pump chump.
- Dying alone.
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To the disappointment of all, however, A-Log never completed his lofty goal of thirty-one chapters for his Halloween fapfics, throwing in the towel at only the seventeenth chapter. It is thought this is due to a number of factors:
- The overwhelming reaction on the other losers on the WWOEC Forums being a resounding 'meh'.
- Trolls bombarding his YouTube channel, mocking his awful writing and requesting to see his six inch foxdick.
- Aspie laziness.
Needless to say, nobody laments what might have been.
A-Log's stories can be read in their entirety here, but one should be sure to have a sizable quantity of brain bleach on hand before doing so...
Moar info: Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto/A-Log's Fanfiction.
A-Log On The Airwaves
Perhaps recognizing that his grotesque appearance might limit his ability to get reliable film and television work, A-Log also hosts a shitty college radio show, A-Log On The Airwaves, that is broadcast on WSIA 88.9 FM every Thursday afternoon from 1:00 to 4:00, which nobody ever listens to except him.
A-Log On The Airwaves is generally seen as something of an embarrassment to the station by the rest of the staff who, understandably, regard it as a tacky radio show with no soul or talent behind it. Similarly, A-Log himself is generally unpopular with the rest of the staff at WSIA and because of his complete inability to conduct himself publicly has been suspended from the station on numerous occasions for various reasons including insubordination, making racist statements, cursing while live on the air (resulting in the station narrowly avoiding a fine from the FCC by saying that they had suspended A-Log indefinitely), damaging expensive studio equipment through negligence and, in one case, being caught browsing cartoon porn while at work by the program director, Andrew Dilorenzo.
A-Log's radio show's content is much like A-Log's YouTube videos and stand-up - that is, the sound of a man talking to himself about things that only interest him and laughing at his own jokes, occasionally playing a song, allowing him to sneak back to the clammy embrace of the WWOEC Forums to fap to some sweet, sweet, cartoon ass.
A-Log's radio show playlist is mostly composed of joke songs and, like most unfunny nerds, his favorite artist is Weird Al Yankovic. He also has a massive hard-on for Dr. Demento and has inflicted his presence upon the good doctor on two occasions, as well as constantly bombarding the poor man with demo tapes for his awful parody songs and break-ins.
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A-Log On The Airwaves is regularly trolled during call-ins, which causes A-Log stress. You can help by doing just that.
A-Log's On-Air Request Line
(718) 982-3060
WSIA-FM
2800 Victory Boulevard Rm 1C-106
Staten Island, New York 10314
Voice-Acting Career
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A-Log is also an aspiring voice actor and a member of several anime fandubbing communities that succeed on being even worse than the Anime Voice Acting Alliance - of which he is also a member.
Of course, as should come as no surprise to anyone, A-Log fails just as hard at voice-acting as he does at everything else.
As is perhaps unsurprising for someone so fat and unappealing, he has expressed a keen interest in making his own hentai dub, providing him with the closest thing he will ever have to actual intimacy with a woman. That is, the two of them, seperated by two panes of soundproof glass, in two seperate recording studios, saying awkward dialogue and mimicking the sounds made by two human beings experiencing a physical love that A-Log himself will never know.
Remember that, next time you want to crack one out to some English-dubbed hentai.
Reporter For WolfDork.com
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Warning! INCOMING SPAGETTASTROPHE! |
In 2008, A-Log attended the New York Anime Festival, where he acted as a roving reporter for the now (unsurprisingly) defunct website, WolfDork.com, presumably chosen over countless better qualified and considerably more competent applicants.
A series of videos of A-Log reporting from the festival were discovered online and later crossposted to /a/ and /cwc/, much to the amusement of the trolls, as these videos provided a rare glimpse of A-Log interacting with normal people... Well, as normal as people in attendance at an anime convention can be, anyway.
In scenes reminiscent of The Onion's 'Autistic Reporter' sketch, A-Log waddles around the convention center clutching a plushie of Kirby, bumbling and stammering his way through several extremely awkward interviews, perving over hentai games, pornographic manga and the attractive female cosplayers in attendance, generally making a nuisance of himself.
It has been argued that these videos are possibly even more awkward than A-Log's stand-up comedy routine.
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—/cwc/ |
Similarities Between A-Log And Chris-Chan
—From A-Log's MySpace | ||
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So, as we've seen, despite being vehement in his loathing of Chris-chan, A-Log, nevertheless, has a lot in common with the manchild.
Here's a compiled list, for the convenience of those of you keeping score at home.
- Both are male.
- Both are autistic.
- Both are fat to the point of being morbidly obese (although it's generally accepted that A-Log is actually fatter than Chris-Chan).
- Both wear glasses.
Both are virginsNope, not anymore. As of April 2012, Chris-chan has lost his virgin with rage status. A-Log, however, is still a virgin.- Despite being virgins, Chris and A-Log nevertheless both claim to be experts when it comes to sex.
- Both Chris and A-Log consider pornography to be educational.
- Both are in possession of an impressive set of man-tits.
- Both make retarded YouTube videos - the only difference being that Chris' videos are actually funny, albeit for the wrong reasons, whereas A-Log's are just boring and irritating.
- Both are ronery and friendless.
- Both are spoiled and coddled.
- Both are unemployed - no, A-Log, that shitty radio show of yours does not count as a real job.
- Despite having lofty ideas about their ideal occupations - in Chris' case, comic books, and in A-Log's, voice acting - both have demonstrated extreme reluctance to actively seek work in those fields expecting instead for their dream jobs to just come to them.
- Both are grown men still living with their mothers.
- Both were academically unsuccessful.
- Both have done nothing with the academic qualifications they studied for - Chris has a CADD associate's degree and A-Log has a bachelor's in dramatic arts.
- Both have no sense of fashion.
- Both were born in the 1980s.
- Both are Christians.
- Both are sexist.
- Both are racist.
- Both are homophobic.
- Both have a complete inability to spot contradictions in their actions.
- Both are lazy, slacking off on their work and demonstrating a complete inability to keep to deadlines.
- Both bitch and whine about their trolls.
- Both bitch and whine about ED.
- Both are ridiculously paranoid about their trolls.
- Despite said paranoia, both fall for the same troll plots and schemes, believing everything they read and taking everything at face value.
- Both were victims of a guido troll with an alliterative name.
- Both of them, rather than accept responsibility for their own actions, instead choose to blame their predicaments on external tormentors.
- Both have entire wikis dedicated to following and cataloging their fail.
- Both have had or continue to have an unkempt goatee which serves only to highlight their fat, flabby faces.
- Both are balding.
- Both are EXTREMELY socially awkward.
- Both have an inflated sense of their own cleverness, wit, self-importance and entitlement.
- Both believe (wrongly) that they are handsome.
- Both try to cultivate an image of being the lovable nice guy, when in reality they are quite the opposite.
- Both try to play down their negative and undesirable personality traits by claiming that at least they are 'honest' about them.
- Both are intellectually on a par with a horny ten-year-old boy.
- Both think everyone wants to hear their views.
- Both have enormous persecution complexes about their baaaawtism.
- Both seem to lack empathy for other people.
- Both are completely self-interested, believing the world to revolve around them.
- Both hold ridiculous beliefs about how the world works.
- Both have stated that they believe that the world would benefit from a holocaust of groups that they consider to be dangerous - Chris wants all gay people to be vaccinated against homosexuality or reprogrammed by the state, but A-Log is more bloodthirsty, believing that every single racist and bigot on the planet should be killed so that race wars will never happen.
- Both insist on referring to themselves by their full names, Christian Weston Chandler and Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto.
- Both experienced developmental delays as children - A-Log didn't speak until he was five, whereas Chris went through a period of silence where he wouldn't speak at all for many years.
- Both do not know what editing is.
- Both fail when they intentionally try to be funny.
- Both are known to repeat their own material, seemingly in the desperate hope that it'll be funnier the next time they tell it.
- Both own a PS3.
- Both were born on a Wednesday.
- Both laugh in the same, stilted, emotionless fake way. "Ha ha ha!"
- Both stress sigh and gesticulate in very similar ways, including the use of The Claw Of Fail.
- Both suffer from B.O. and use AXE body spray to try and mask their stench. In A-Log's case, people publicly complained that he smelled.
- Both are known to mock and ridicule those they view as inferior in order to make themselves appear better, up to and including exhibiting a prejudice against against those with lower functioning forms of autism or other mental handicaps such as Down's syndrome.
- Both are often the victims of prank phone calls.
- Both are known to make ridiculous threats when they feel that they have been disenfranchised.
- Both are cowardly.
- Both have disrespected the memories of those who died in the 9/11 terrorist attacks.
- Both have spoken on behalf of dead celebrities that they had never met, using the deceased as a mouthpeice for their own self-serving agendas and interests.
- Both write awful fanfiction with lots of unnecessary author-service sex scenes.
- Both were rightly bullied at school.
- Both created highly derivative Sonic fan characters during high school to cope with the stresses of teenage life. However, whereas Sonichu was created to be the best friend Chris never had, A-Log's character, an echidna-succubus named Enchantra, was designed primarily as fap material for the young A-Log and to help him deal with rejection from girls.
- Both of their original characters are defined by their utter lack of personality.
- Both of their original characters liberally borrow elements from other, previously copyrighted characters.
- Both create rule 34 of their own original characters, albeit in different ways - Chris-chan draws, A-Log writes.
- Both took their moms to their high school prom as their date.
- Both still hold grudges against their high school to this day.
- Both blamed a figure of authority from their school days for their current predicaments in life.
- Both still wear and highly value their high school rings, despite having long graduated from high school.
- Both freely offer their personal information to the Internet at large with little regard to the consequences.
- Both spent their 25th birthdays at home, alone, making videos for YouTube. This is doubly ironic as, in a previous commentary about Chris-chan's Future Message video, A-Log mocked Chris for this behavior and stated that he would be doing something a lot better for his 25th.
- Both enjoy and by enjoying, ruin for everybody else, typical staples of nerd humor such as Monty Python and Weird Al Yankovic.
- Both hope to become famous and/or recognized and are taking the path of least resistance in the hopes of acheiving it.
- Both watch and enjoy programing that they are far too old for - including Sonic the Hedgehog, Pokémon, Sailor Moon and the Samurai Pizza Cats.
- Both masturbate over cartoon characters - including Marge Simpson - and apparently see nothing wrong with this.
- Both have a fixation on a character from Family Guy - in Chris' case, Meg, in A-Log's case, Lois.
- Both have a fixation on a character from Sonic the Hedgehog - in Chris' case, Amy Rose, in A-Log's case, Rouge the Bat.
- Both have the same Pokémon poster in their rooms.
- Both are unashamed gag thieves, stealing jokes from other media that they enjoy and trying to pass them off as their own.
- Both do not understand what a parody is.
- Both are known to make references and comparisons to characters, things and events from obscure niche media that they enjoy (cartoons, professional wrestling, old video games), expecting everybody else to automatically understand and get the joke because they get it.
- Both have an odd, slightly Norman Bates-esque fixation on their mothers.
- Both disagree with their fathers politically.
- Both voted for Obama.
- Both have used their mothers' credit cards to purchase things that would please them and them alone.
- Both greatly overestimate the size and influence of their YouTube fanbase.
- Both have implored their audience on YouTube to contact the authorities and have them arrest somebody they personally disliked.
- Both have wished God would smite people they personally disliked.
- Both have been the subject of Q&A sessions with trolls conducted by their former friends who had grown tired of their shit.
- Both play with LEGOs.
- Both own plushies of Sonic the Hedgehog.
- Both have had material they have submitted published in magazines, in Chris' case Nintendo Power, in A-Log's case, Operation: Three-Legged Dolphin.
- Both suck at doing impressions and accents.
- Both suck at singing (although it has been argued that Chris, despite being tonedeaf, is actually a technically better singer than A-Log, possessing more range).
- Both usually (but not always) begin their videos with a certain phrase, A-Log's being "Greetings and salutations to all..." and Chris' being "Captain's Log..."
- Both frequently stammer and stumble over their words.
- Both are known to overuse discourse markers when speaking (This is never more evident than in A-Log's overuse of the word 'basically').
- Both have been known to make up their own curses and use them in place of normal swear words.
- Both have compared themselves to God.
- Both are obsessed with entering contests.
- Both appear prematurely old due to their slovenly lifestyles, bad dieting and poor wardrobe choices.
- Both sometimes use mangled Spanish.
- Both have no talents, skills, self-awareness or future.
- Both will die alone.
HI A-LOG
A-Log's notoriety as Chris-chan's most vocal and pathetic hater eventually spawned a popular catchphrase on the various forums and boards where the manchild is discussed. HI A-LOG.
Whenever a newfag or troll shielder ventures into such discussion and posts venomously about how Chris-chan is an abomination, the worst human being since Hitler, how he makes unemployed, autistic, Sonic and My Little Pony fans who still live at home with their parents look bad and how they would like nothing so much as to slowly, sadistically and, perhaps, sexually murder him, blah blah blah, they can look forward to a resounding chorus of HI A-LOG!
The intimation being that said poster, by being legitimately enraged and personally offended by Chris-chan's existence, rather than simply laughing at him as a harmless Internet retard, must be similarly as pathetic as our old buddy, A-Log. Because everything has to have a specific label in the world of Chris-chan trolling, such behavior is known as A-Logging, after Mr. LoGatto himself, and those that practice it are known as A-Logs (plural) or mini A-Logs.
CWCki Forums even made their own 'HI A-LOG' emoticon depicting our tubby hero, to make saying 'Hi' to A-Logs even easier - a sensible measure, as everybody knows how many A-Logs lurk there.
It is thought that the earliest use of the phrase 'HI A-LOG' in this context was when the actual A-Log attempted to post anonymously on /cwc/, but due to his distinctive and ferociously anti-CWC rhetoric, as well as his incredibly autistic posting style, ended up being identified and outed by the regular /cwc/fags almost immediately. The phrase 'HI A-LOG' has apparently become of considerable annoyance to the real A-Log, likely because from now on, he can never be sure if someone enthusiastically hallooing him in public is actually a dang dirty troll from the Internet getting a cheap laugh at his expense.
Dox
—A message from A-Log posted on Fanfiction.net. It is worth pointing out that A-Log still managed to drop his full name into this message TWICE. | ||
Like the manchild he so cheerfully ridicules, A-Log is a naive moron who namefags fucking everywhere on the off, desperate chance that he'll be recognized by someone who'll give him the high-paying television or radio job he clearly longs for.
As such, it is frighteningly easy to locate his dox after even the most casual of Google searches. He has also cheerfully dropped his own dox on numerous occasions - why don't you show him your appreciation?
- Full Name: Anthony Louis 'A-Log' LoGatto
- YouTube: His new YouTube,
His old account, ALogTVBALEETED! - BlipTV: ALogTV
- MySpace: Anthony LoGatto on MySpace, Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto on MySpace, A-Log On The Airwaves MySpace Page.
- deviantArt: A-Log on deviantArt, Teen Robot Club
- FurAffinity
- WWOEC User Profile
- Mad Music Archive Account
- MadSpace Account
- FanFiction.net Account
- LiveJournal
- VAA Account
- E-mail: [email protected]
- Skype: a-log_1985
- AIM: WeirdnessAnime
- MSN: [email protected]
A-Log's Mom
/cwc/fags came across (and then CAME across, no doubt) some pictures of A-Log's mother and, rather than the mummified, Agnes Skinner off of The Simpsons-esque hag you would expect to have spawned someone with as many obvious failings as A-Log, she's actually kind of fappable, if you don't mind your MILFs a bit on the rough, leathery side and can ignore the fact that twenty-seven years ago, she expelled from her vagina a bloated tardbaby who is presently fucking up YouTube with his cancerous and unfunny video commentaries.
Some argue that A-Log's mom might be the source of his MILF fetish and that, by fapping to cartoon MILFs, A-Log is actually attempting to assuage his guilt about fapping to his own mother, making him even more of a sick fuck than previously thought.
Once again, you can help this article by adding MOAR pictures of A-Log's mom.
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"Hello, Mother, dear..." -
Those glasses look awfully familiar... -
A-Log, on his way to the prom with his date. His own mother.
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Dodson! We've got Dodson here! -
Pay particular attention to the expression of thinly-disguised disgust displayed on A-Log's mother's face as she looks askance at her rotund, Goku shirted offspring. -
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In this family portrait, we see clearly that, from a young age, A-Log has always been an irritating little faggot. -
Note the infant A-Log's grotesque, swollen and misshapen head. His mother should've done the decent thing and handed the wretched little mutant over to the Inquisition when she had the chance. -
The only thing missing from A-Log's outfit in this photograph is his Sonichu medallion. -
Flirting on Facebook. -
A-Log with his sisters.
From what little information can be gleaned about her, we know that A-Log's mother's name is Margo Bornstein LoGatto, she is 57 years old and appears to work as a lawyer of some sort, much like A-Log's best buddy, Spax3's mom.
Margo gave birth to her son, Anthony on the 8th of May, 1985. Likely knowing from the early days of A-Log's development that her water-headed son wouldn't amount to much, Margo chose to enroll him in a private school for other retards like him, Legacy High School, where A-Log spent his formative years among other precious little embarrassments to their parents, drooling, wearing a helmet indoors and reading books with chewable covers until he was eleven so that he couldn't bother the normal children with his faggotry. It was also revealed that she escorted the young A-Log to his high school prom as his date. Whether or not he got any that night is unknown.
It is worth noting at this point that Christian Weston Chandler, the manchild that A-Log so vocally despises, was mainstreamed all through his education, thus making him LESS retarded than A-Log.
A-Log's Nakama
Moar info: Friends of A-Log.
A-Log desperately seeks validation from others to convince himself he's not a total failure and little more than Chris-chan 2.0.
To this end, the fat fuck surrounds himself with a winger-dinger circlejerk of permavirgin Internet friends, all of whom, like himself, possess varying levels of autism and are all almost as pathetic as he is. They can be spotted on A-Log's channel page or in the comments section of his videos, hungrily and enthusiastically sucking on Mr. LoGatto's stubby little e-cock and sometimes even appearing in his shitty videos in unfunny cameo appearances bitching, with an unsurprising lack of self-awareness, that Chris-Chan and various other tards are giving autism a bad name.
Unsurprisingly, most of these individuals proved to be little more than fair-weather friends and were quick to abandon and/or betray A-Log when they too came under attention from trolls.
Related Subpages
External Links
- /cwc/ thread on A-Log #1 Archive
- /cwc/ thread on A-Log #2 Archive
- /cwc/ thread on A-Log #3 Archive
/cwc/ thread on A-Log #4Baleeted (No archive so far lel)- An article about A-Log from Forces of Geek - A-Log: The Man in the Mirror.
- Just like Chris-chan, A-Log also has a troll wiki dedicated to chronicling his life: Logattopedia. Archive
See Also
- Christian Weston Chandler
- YouTube Commentaries
- Troll Shielding
- Unfunny
- Aspierations
- Unwarranted Self-Importance
- Unrealistic expectations
- WWOEC
- Ickeriss69 - Another troll shielding faggot.
- Spax3 - A-Log's friend, IRL.
- RandomDCE - A-Log was this one of this Britfag sperglord's chief asskissers on YouTube.
- David Tanny - Whom A-Log is friends with on Facebook.
- Sonmanic - Who successfully had one of A-Log's commentaries about him taken down, triggering an Internet sissyfight between the two lolcows.
- Sailormoonred1
- Nick Bate
- Onigojirakaiju - A fat fag who thinks he can intimidate people.
- The Unknown Autobot - A-Log's trollbusting doppelganger.
- ADF-Fuensalida
- Inuboy1000 - Another autistic loser with ambitions of being an epic ween Chris-chan troll and a boner for that fag who played Anakin Skywalker in Star Wars: Episode II.
- SaturnDOS - A far more fucked up version of A-Log
- Sons of Kojima - The DSP equivalent.
- Isabella Loretta Janke - Another well-known A-Log of Christian Weston Chandler.
- Mi Vida Bajo El Puente - Hispanic version, currently obsessed with Doomentio.
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Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto is part of a series on Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage. |
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Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto is part of a series on
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Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto is part of a series on Aspies. | [Sperg out] |
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| Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto is part of a series on Dying Alone
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