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Ilnaz Galyaviev: Difference between revisions

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==Graded Score==
==Graded Score==
{{GradedScore|9|9 dead, 23 injured|6|Shitty accuracy due to shoddy explosives|5|Unoriginal plan that has been done better before, with a shitty execution to boot|15|International coverage, moderate amount of butthurt in Russia|20|[https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-57079367 Putin will most likely tighten gun control laws, in a country with a ton of gun control already]|55|F|Cyka blyat}}


==See Also==
==See Also==

Revision as of 22:10, 29 July 2021

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This page is about an attempted an hero.
Ilnaz Galyaviev
Born: September 11th, 2001
Nationality Russian  
High Score 9 killed, 23 injured
Top 50? Nah
Style FPS, Single player
An Hero? No


In the months following Robert Aaron Long's shooting spree, it seems that High Scores have finally returned to the Americunt landscape. But what about other countries? Enter Ilnaz Galyaviev, a schizophrenic russkie who decided to culturally appropriate a notorious American tradition.

Motive

The post in question.

Not much is known about Ilnaz's early life, if he even had one, but one thing is for certain: he had a serious case of misanthropy and a crippling case of USI (with a bit of Narcissism thrown in there for good measure).

Mr. Galyaviev believed that he was God, specifically sent down to kill all human life, so much so that he declared on Telegram that he intended to kill at least 10 people, then commit suicide afterwards (Spoiler alert: neither of those things happened).

   
 
As a God I want you to declare yourself as my slaves. You have to do absolutely everything I want to. I want you to kill more than 10 and off yourself then. There shouldn't be living creatures in the world, it's a universe mistake.
 

 
 

—Ooh, look at Mr. Internet Tough Guy over here.

   
 
I came to this world in human form to get rid of you all.
 

 
 

—Nevermind, just an unfunny edgelord.

The Shooting

The gun that was used.

Much like Vladislav Roslyakov, Ilnaz has planned to detonate a bomb in a common area, then begin shooting with a shotgun before committing suicide; he even had the same model gun (Hatsan Escort 12 gauge) and everything. However, unlike Vlad's killing spree 3 years prior, there were several failures in his plan that caused him to be largely regarded as an edgy loser.

First off, Ilnaz started his spree by shooting a security guard at the entrance of the school. However, he only wounded the guard, as opposed to killing him. As a result, the security guard was able to press a panic button that put the school into lockdown, seemingly putting an end to the High Score attempt before it even began.

Since the school was locked down, Ilnaz was roaming the halls looking for people to kill, with little success. So, he put an IED outside of a classroom, which did absolutely fuck-all as one would expect. Pro-tip: trying to blow up an already locked down target will just make you look like a dumbass.

At some point, Ilnaz finally found an unlocked classroom (which was most likely not secured properly), in which he promptly killed seven of the eight people that were found inside. But at this point, the KGB was already storming the building. So, he did what any other suicidal school shooter would do: he surrendered. A pathetic ending for a pathetic person, how fitting.

And the Verdict is...

Ilnaz plead guilty the day after the shooting (after attempting to commit suicide in jail that is), presumably to escape the possibility of going to a Siberian gulag as punishment. Sentencing will take place sometime in July.

Gallery

Videos

Graded Score

Graded Score
Kill count: 9/20 9 dead, 23 injured
Accuracy: 6/20 Shitty accuracy due to shoddy explosives
Style: 5/20 Unoriginal plan that has been done better before, with a shitty execution to boot
Butthurt: 15/20 International coverage, moderate amount of butthurt in Russia
Bonus: 20/20 Putin will most likely tighten gun control laws, in a country with a ton of gun control already
Total Score: 55/100 (F)
Cyka blyat
See full ranking


See Also


Ilnaz Galyaviev is part of a series on Are You Ready? [GAME OVERInsert Coin] Go!
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