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Manchild

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A manchild (see also basement dweller) is an adult male who refuses to accept the responsibilities of adulthood and chooses instead to live as if they were a young child, in other words you. It is also a known fact that 99.99% of manchildren are furries, and have hard-ons for Sonic the Hedgehog and colorful cartoon ponies. Naturally, this means that they are gigantic faggots, and invariably furfags.

A manchild.

This is always the result of a "serious mental handicap". As in, they are too fucking lazy and socially inept to get a job.

It is interesting to note that manchildren, as their name suggest, are always male and that there is no such thing as a 'womanchild'. This is because women are children. Indeed, the qualities that make manchildren so pathetic (childishness, naïveté, sexual inexperience) are generally considered positive, attractive qualities in women by men and because society considers it acceptable that women are allowed to be parasites that do nothing but laze around at home for the rest of their lives.


Etiology

 

Children are increasingly molded by gross societal negligence, piss poor parenting practices, regressive educational requirements inferior gene pools and overzealous marketing endeavors. Largely stemming from "Generation Barney", children of the 90s were taught early on that failure was perfectly acceptable and even rewarded for it. Starting with the "No Child Left Behind" stupidity, kids were suddenly reduced to the level of the "lowest common denominator" of the classroom, given A+'s for having an "A"ttitude that was "+" positive, it insidiously became imperative to make kids as happy as possible and with as little disappointment than it was to actually educate them in any constructive, useful manner.

Kids were taught that it is "okay" to be a basement dwelling welfare leach so long as they were happy and had a good attitude about it as it's not their fault anyway. They were taught that it was "okay" to wet the bed past the age of 5, yielding an increased demand on baby diapers that were put on the market last thursday that would have been completely shameful in decades past. Fast food happy meals were likewise super sized, not because kids were actually eating more, but simply because they kept on ordering the baby meals well into their tweens and teens.

Our society has since degenerated into a form of super acceptance, to the point where failure itself is something to be celebrated and standards of acceptable behavior have downgraded to a near infantile level. Creative new medical conditions and disorders have likewise been confabulated, permitting parents to raise "unique" little disease-bags rather than real children. Mommy's little malady, daddy's little disorder, it has become literally in vogue to have a "special" child with a "special" problem, upon which any failures or generally shitty behavior can be labeled with a convenient, all encompassing excuse.

Symptoms

 
Another manchild.

The subject in question may exhibit many of these classic symptoms:


A typical manchild. Notice how he hates things made after the 1990s.

What manchildren like to do erryday.

Stages

 
Typical manchildren
  1. Fagolescence: Adults who act like teenagers
  2. Olchai: Adults who act like children.
  3. Adult babies: Adults who act like babies.

Variants

Generally there are two types of manchildren, the emotionally unstable drama whore type and the flippant, fun loving, lazy bastard type. The former make for excellent trolling due to the fact that they'll blow up over the slightest little thing, often have great difficulty controlling their emotions and are generally prone to acting out with little inhibition; most often due to lack of recognizing the potential consequences and outcomes of social situations.

More often than not they tend to float over in the aspie end of the spectrum, while the later category tend to be apathetic, carefree neurotypicals who generally don't take anything seriously...at all. Trolling or flaming that type is not recommended, they'll simply laugh it off, poke fun at you for not acting like them and due to their complete inability to take anything seriously (least of all themselves), any attempted attack or troll will fail before it has even begun.

Examples

Interest Groups and Communities

Celebrities

Internet Kooks

Gallery

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]


See also


  Manchild is part of a series on Aspies. [Back to your happy placeSperg out]

Academy ManiacsAdam LanzaAlbert EinsteinAlexander SlavrosAmber ButtrumAndy KaufmanAnthony 'A-Log' LoGattoAspies for FreedomAspierationsAssburgerBaldi's BasicsBambifan101Barron TrumpBart-ToonsBeefraveBenny_the_SnakeBenthelooneyBen ShapiroBill9929Bill GatesBlocklandersBlueCatRioluBodyXPoliticBonziWORLDBoris MalagurskiBourg ProductionsBram CohenBrandon SmithBrownsquirrelCameron W. CowanCansin13ChibiyimaChris-chanChris Harper-MercerClay ClaymoreCyndilovespiccoloDan CilleyDarrDarius McCollumDarviela MaravaronaDavid CleggDaxFlameDellordev-catscratchDiogo MendesDisneyFan01DLAbaoaquDodgerofZionDragonfandrp1zzaEddie WiseEdenHeroineGirlElliot RodgerEmpLemonErik RibsskogErin AnthonyEvan GraggFlaglerchatFlardoxFucklewithshuckleFUNImation2002GachatardsGalaxyRailways2199Gary McKinnonGeosheaGlitchedbloodGoFagsGrantMGraykatGreg MazujianGreenyfagsHannah CappsHeed My WarningHozupindahows00sInmendhamInuboy1000IronholdsJack Gilbert GrahamJared MiltonJahi/4444Javi SuzumiyaJINXDROWNEDJoekerJohn Patrick RogersJoseph8276JustinandDennisJustinRPGJoey The AutistKeegan SalisburyKawaii KitsuneKawaiiKittee88KelseyaliciaKevin HavensKingMasterReviewKirbysloverKloeriKongzillarex619KothorixKphoriaLane DavisLeafyIsHereLogo KidsLordelthibarLougaraLukas PietschLyndsay KirkhamLynn AnnM. ChaosManlytearsMar9122Marcus PotterMarioMan7890MarioMario456Mark ZuckerbergMascotGuyMatthew DavisMatthew NicholsonMDetector5Michael GimsonMinefagsMisha SilenostiMissyMix HyenaMonica PunkMumkey JonesMutescreamMylarBalloonFanNate SpidgewoodNemo HanaNeuroNichole337Nick BravoNicky ReillyNikolas CruzObjectcucksOlinkalexOnigojirakaijuOnyx ForepawPacificoceanasiaPhantomStriderPhonefagsPMDrive1061PopcornPrince JeremyRandy StairRavenNGRobert Clark YoungROtardsRootbrianRoss LumbusRyanSammyClassicSonicFanSaturnDOSSebastien LevesqueSeunghwan LeeSeleryShane LeeSiriusOrionisSolidMarioSONYFANBOYSperginStarbladeStarkiller88SteAndKelSuperMarioLoganSuper Minecraft KidTablecowTGcomixTheAmazingAtheistTheDOSFagThe Eclectic EspeonThe rEactorTheme Park ReviewTheMysteriousMrEnterTherealagerbonThe JuggernautThe Unknown AutobotTheVeganStudentTimboxToby J RathjenToKeNTom SersonToonEGuyToshTrigglypuffTylerthDragonUlillilliaVailskibum94Varg VikernesWaymuuWeatherManKevinWeDoALittleTrollingWeegeeisgoingtokillmWerechuWetflamewillg8686William "AlGore" AtchisonWilliam FreundWim CrusioWolfAdvocateWolfeedarkfangwwwareaYouZS3

Manchild is part of a series on Dying Alone

[DeadCry yourself to sleep]

  Those Who Have Died Alone

Aaron AlexisAaron BushnellAaron SwartzAdam LanzaAlexis ArquetteAmanda ToddAmy WinehouseAnal CuntAndy KaufmanAngry GrandpaAnna Nicole SmithAnthony WarnerAsa CoonBrian AdamsBrandon CrispByuuCharmaine DragunCho Seung-HuiChris BenoitChris Harper-MercerChynaCodey PorterDavid BowieDavid CarradineDragoneerEazy-EEdaremElliot RodgerElvis PresleyGeorge SodiniGizgizGleb KorablevHappyCabbieHarambeH.P. LovecraftHeath LedgerJake DavisonJeff WeiseJewWarioJim MorrisonKate SpadeKitty0706Kurt CobainLemonade CoyoteLeelah AlcornLil PeepLiloLoki BlackfangLowtaxMia JaninMegan MeierMichael JacksonMitchell HendersonMySpaceNathan GaleNikita LytkinOtoya YamaguchiPekka-Eric AuvinenPrinceRandy StairRehtaeh ParsonsRicardo LopezRina PalenkovaRipperRobin WilliamsRonnie McNuttRudolph ZurickRyan PalmeterShawn WoolleyShayShuaibySol PaisStephen PaddockSteve StephensThomas Matthew CrooksTony48219TooDamnFilthyTyler DumstorfVester FlanaganWilliam AtchisonXXXTentacionZhao Zewei

Those Dying Alone

03bgood2cash2 gryphon7jackass77Adam SandlerAhuviya HarelAIDS SkrillexAkewsticRockRAlex FordAlison RappAmerica's Third PartyAmy SchumerAndrew AllansonAngry JoeAnimatedJamesAnita SarkeesianAnonymous BorgAnthony 'A-Log' LoGattoAntony AguilarApril DavisAquagirlwhitefoxArgent009Arguecat3Arin HansonArmake21AsalieriAsher2500Austin AlexanderAvantGardePonyBambifan101BarneyfagBasement DwellersBen FordBen MoynihanBenny_the_SnakeBenthelooneyBig RedBikerfoxBill9929Bill GaedeBill GatesBLACKbusterCriticBob RehahnBrandontheMovieGuyBrandon SmithBrian MuellerBrian Richard ZaigerBrianna WuBroniesButLovaByAppointmentToCarl the CuckCartoonjunkieCaseydeckerCatboyKamiCheeyevChloe SagalChris-chanChris CrockerChuck M.Clint of Rise and FallCopperCabCorey MargeraCoughlan666CrazyvideosandrantsCrinklemonCyraxxDaniel BrandtDan CilleyDane CookDani FilthDarius McCollumDarknessthecurseDarksydePhilDave ChapelleDave MustaineDavid HockeyDaxflameDBoyWheelerDeekerDeterminedToDrawUTDev-catscratchDGTrixieDiaper BoyDillon CosseyDiogo MendesDisneyFan01DisneyMasterDJ KEEMSTARDnepropetrovsk maniacsDodgerofZionDogpatch PressDon RobertsDoodletonesDoomer3868Dorian_GayDoug WalkerDrakonDrossRotzankDoomentioDustinEDP445Emer PrevostEmosEpic Fat GuyEpicKitty54Eric AbramovEric RidenourErik RibsskogErtasVideosFilthy FrankFagolescentsFanFic CriticFast EddieFat ManFaust & Pory Five Nights at Freddy's fansFlardoxFluffy teh wolfForeverKailynFriends of A-LogFurriesG-ZayGather Against FateGeorge LopezGeosheaGhostGirlvinylGlobelampGoddessMilleniaGraykatGreg MazujianGwen GaleGwen StefaniHarmful OpinionsHellkiller777I Dislike Cis PeopleI Hate EverythingIan Miles CheongIchverboticze⁴rImma-The-DeerInkBunnyIsabella Loretta JankeJamil The KingJessi SlaughterJessica LeedsJim ProfitJINXDROWNEDJoe Crusher PicklesJoekerJohn BullaJohn FieldJohn KricfalusiJohn Patrick RogersJonathan McIntoshJonmonJonTronJoseph CampJoseph8276Joshua "Null" MoonJuggalosJustinRPGKat DenningsKendall JennerKeegan SalisburyKathleen ToddKenny GlennKevin HavensKeffalsKimmo Johan AlmKingEmpoleonKingMasterReviewKrashedLaci GreenLarry the Cable GuyLauren FaustLeafyIsHereLecarickLeigh AlexanderLeisureSuitGamingLena DunhamLeonard F. Shaner Jr.Leslie JonesLifeInATentLikeicareLinkaraLittleCloudLittleKuribohLogo KidsLordelthibarLow Tier GodLucian HodobocM. ChaosA Man in BlackManchildrenMar9122MarblesMarioMario456MariotehplumberMarjan SiklicmasteroogwgayMatthew DavisMatthew NicholsonMcJuggerNuggetsMDetector5‎MeowbarkMeganSpeaksMichael BattonMichael FitzhywelMichael GimsonMike SandyMoleman9000Monica PunkMonkeyGameGuidesMoviebobMumkey JonesMuZemikeMylarBalloonFanMysteriousMrEnterMysticArkNaokoElric2250NawlinWikiNeckbeardsNeoGAFNick BateNick BravoNikkineko333Noah AntwilerNostalgia ChickNotchNullcherriObjectfagsOFWGKTAOnideus Mad HatterOnyx ForepawPacificoceanasiaPaigeGirlPaul FeigPaulie CalafioreParkourdude91Peter BrightPeter CoffinPhantomStrider8Phil FishPhunWithLogicPinkieponyPit ViperPixyteriPeluchin EntertainmentPMRantsPreachingthegospelQuentin TarantinoRachael MacFarlaneRandi HarperRichard ReidRicki RavenRMG ProductionsRobert StaintonRobert Wayne StilesRockosockoRomeo RoseRootbrianRose3212Ryan RouthSad FrogSammyClassicSonicFanSam PepperSarah ButtsSarahisniftySaturnDOSSceptreSchnookumsSegacampSega KidSeth MacFarlaneSethistoShadmanSimply OkamiSlowbeef & DiabetusSnapesnoggerSonic SaviorSonmanicSony-MaeSophie LabelleSpax3StormySuperlisamcbSusan BoyleTara StrongTheAmazingAtheistTheDOSFagTheSockDetectiveTim BuckleyTJ LaneTodd in the ShadowsTom PrestonToonEGuyTourneyfagsTrey Eric SeslerTrigglypuffTyciolTyler GarmanyUlillilliaThe Unknown AutobotVadeVinceintheBayWade FulpWeatherManKevinWesley!!!WoWfan4lifeWwwareaWeegeeisgoingtokillmXenuriaYandereDevYoshiwii1Youyoungbloodfantasy91Zoe QuinnZone

Their Methods

9gagAdventure TimeAn HeroAIDSAnimuAlt-rightArt SchoolA-Log's Fanfictionask.fmAsperger's SyndromeAssigned MaleBath SaltsThe Big Bang TheoryBattle For Dream IslandBlackLivesMatterBlack metalBody PillowsBonziWORLDBitViewBoozeBullyingBuzzFeedChildren's CartoonsClown WorldComputer Science IIICosplayCumOnPrintedPics.ComCupheadDead FriendDeath metalDeath penaltyDating SimsDeviantARTDiscordDrugsEdginessFamily GuyFanFictionFeminismFedoraFidget spinnerThe Filthy Frank ShowFive Nights at Freddy'sFleshlightFriend ZoneFurAffinityFurry ArtFun Shitposting WikiGarry's ModGenshin ImpactGoAnimate!GooglewhackingGorillazGothsGravity FallsGreen DayGreeny PhatomGrindcoreHackingHappy Madison ProductionsHomestuck‎Hover hand‎HufflepuffHigh ScoreIncelcoreIndie musicInfantilismInsane Clown PosseIntrovertInvisible GirlfriendIRCJenkemKiwi FarmsKotakuLeague of LegendsLegoLibertarianismLiveJournalLonelyLoveShyMai WaifuMass ShootingsMen's rights activismMinecraftMLP ForumsMMORPGsMGTOWMUDsMy Little PonyMy Tiny DickNice GuyismNu metalOculus RiftOh ShiternetOnline datingOnline sex gamesOverwatchPlastic CrapPlenty of Fish/r9k/Rick and MortyRobloxRule 34RuneScapeSchool ShootingsSecond LifeSelf-VictimizationShy Boys IRLSilk Screen Goku ShirtSlayerSlipknotSluthateSmogon UniversitySocial JusticeSource FilmmakerSouth ParkSparkalloonSpeakoniaStar vs. the Forces of EvilSteven UniverseTaking the Internet Too SeriouslyTeam Fortress 2That Guy With The GlassesThe Anytown ShowThe EntersphereThe SimsThey Might Be GiantsTomb RaiderToolTransformersTulpasTumblrTV Tropestwenty one pilotsUnchartedUncle GrandpaUncyclopediaUndertaleUnikittyUTTPVidLiiVirginityVirtual YouTubersVloggerheadsWatchMojo.comWeezerWikimaniaWizardchanWorld of WarcraftYIIK: A Post-Modern RPGYouTube

Manchild
is part of a series on
Manchildren
 

ManchildrenPastimesEnemies