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Revision as of 22:08, 12 July 2024
Ryan Palmeter is yet another mediocre mass shooting article. You can help by not writing articles on every boring edgelord that goes postal and reminding the author they aren't AlGore. |
please click here and slowly scroll down to the bottom of the page. |
Ryan Palmeter | |
---|---|
Born | November 28, 2001 |
Died | August 26, 2023 (aged 21) |
Nationality: | Americunt |
Highscore | 3 killed, 0 injured |
Top 50? | No |
Style | FPS, Single player |
An Hero? | Yes |
Ryan Christopher Palmeter卐 was a 21-year-old suicidal crybaby, college dropout, and CIA asset from Jacksonville, Florida who sacrificed his life to continue the work of his idol Brenton Tarrant in removing the Fried Chicken Filth from the South. Having grown up in a place called "Oakville Plantation," he had experienced his fair share of gangbangs and assrapes from niggers, and decided to get revenge on the darkies with an AR-15 on August 26, 2023.
Palmeter boasted a history of mental illness and had previously been involuntarily institutionalized in 2017 for an emergency mental health evaluation following a threat to yeet himself from the roof of a building.
The Attack
Palmeter had planned to go postal at Edward Waters University, a school in Jacksonville with a historically black student body and staff, but he was approached by a security guard while lurking near the campus library and then asked to leave after he refused to identify himself. Palmeter retreated to his car, where he was seen equipping a ballistics vest and mask. Security was alerted again and attempted to confront him once more, but he drove away before he could be accosted.
With his grand plans apparently thwarted, he set his sights on a shitty little Dollar General of all places instead. He shot and killed one nigger in her car in the parking lot, and then another nigger who was stealing merchandise inside. Two more niggers walked in while the shooting was going on, at whom Palmeter opened fire but only killed one, leaving the other completely unscathed. Finally, he called his daddy to tell him how to find his multiple manifestos and then turned his gun on himself before he could get raped by the cops and then later by Bubba.
Manifestos
Palmeter wrote multiple manifestos because of course he fucking did, detailing his mission that he descriptively titled "Total Nigger Death," which was supposed to include even honorary negroes like Eminem and Machine Gun Kelly. He expressed admiration for such killers as the Oklahoma City bomber and Virginia Tech shooter, but admonished the Boogaloo Boys as larpers because they are cowards who have not actually committed murder.
Paradoxically, his writings indicated a positive opinion of black Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, whom he admired as having "interpret(ed) laws based on the Constitution instead of doing faggy activist shit like the last half-century's worth of Supreme Court Justices."
Reactions
As the shooting took place in Florida where 12 out of 10 locals supported bringing back slavery, there wasn't much butthurt from the media, but of course Old Joe had to give another unoriginal reaction to the shooting, this time saying “White supremacy has no place in America”. Ron DeSantis called Palmeter a pussy for becoming An Hero, being fully aware that a lifetime of buttsecks with Bubba was not a better option. Of course, some butthurt niggas didn`t like Ronnie`s statement , and even booed him of stage when he attended a vigil to pretend he gave a shit about the victims.
Graded Score
Kill count: | 3/20 Not much of a loss for the states cotton production |
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Accuracy: | 2/20 Chased some bitch around the store and still couldn't get the kill |
Style: | 14/20 Tactical vest and Nazi shit scribbled on his AR-15 |
Butthurt: | 7/20 Got the media to blame the governor somehow |
Bonus: | 5/20 Caused minor butthurt in Florida but otherwise insignificant |
See Also
- Patrick Crusius - Part one of the shopping trilogy
- Payton Gendron - Part two of the shopping trilogy
- Dylann Roof
- Florida
- Epic fail
- Nazi
- Niggers
- White supremacy
- Meth
- Fatass
- Redneck
Ryan Palmeter |
|
Places |
Africa ♠ Antigua and Barbuda ♠ Atlanta ♠ Dead Nigger Storage ♠ Detroit ♠ E.S. Nigger Brown Stand ♠ Egypt ♠ Gambia ♠ The Ghetto ♠ Habbo Hotel ♠ Houston ♠ Kenya ♠ Liberia ♠ Mediatakeout ♠ Montenegro ♠ Mozambique ♠ Nawlins ♠ Prison ♠ Sierra Leone ♠ Somalia ♠ South Africa ♠ Soulja Boy Tellem Chat ♠ Sudan ♠ Tanzania ♠ Washington, DC ♠ Zimbabwe | |
---|---|---|
Personas |
Aboriginal ♠ Blackinese ♠ Boko Haram ♠ Chav ♠ Crips ♠ Goth ♠ Native ♠ Nigger ♠ Negress ♠ Nigra ♠ OFWGKTA ♠ Transnigger ♠ Wigger ♠ Younger Woolwich Boyz | |
People |
2Pac ♠ 345rv5 ♠ Aaron Alexis ♠ Abner Louima ♠ Adria Richards ♠ Afro-chan ♠ Afro Ninja ♠ Afroduck ♠ Ainsley Harriott ♠ Al Sharpton ♠ Alison Floyd ♠ Alvin Greene ♠ Amanda Kijera ♠ AmericanDad86 ♠ AnimatedJames ♠ Antoine Dodson ♠ Axel Muganwa Rudakubana ♠ Bags of Money ♠ BANGS ♠ Barack Hussein Obama ♠ Barry Bonds ♠ Bernie Mac ♠ Beyoncé Knowles ♠ Bill Clinton ♠ Bill Cosby ♠ Black Diligent ♠ BLACK_MAN ♠ Black Panther ♠ BLACKB0ND ♠ BLACKbusterCritic ♠ Blackwashing ♠ Blue-Six ♠ Bomani Armah ♠ Brandon Phillips ♠ Brenda Williams ♠ Breonna Taylor ♠ Bryce Williams ♠ Bubba ♠ C-NOTE ♠ Canibus ♠ CandyJunkie ♠ Cardi B ♠ Carlton ♠ Casey Brezik ♠ Caster Semenya ♠ Charles Ramsey ♠ Charlie Check'm ♠ Cheyenne Cherry ♠ China Guy ♠ Chris Brown ♠ Chris Dorner ♠ Clay Claymore ♠ Cobanermani456 ♠ ComedyShortsGamer ♠ Condoleezza Rice ♠ Cosmo Setepenra ♠ CRoadwarrior ♠ Culexor ♠ Cynthia McKinney ♠ Cyntoia Brown ♠ DaBaby ♠ Dangerman ♠ Darrell Brooks ♠ Dave Chappelle ♠ David Wu-Kapauw ♠ Dcigs ♠ Dead nigger baby ♠ Deborrah Cooper ♠ Demcad ♠ DeWayne Craddock ♠ DJBPlaythroughs ♠ Dr. Laura Schlessnigger ♠ Dramasetter ♠ EDP445 ♠ Etika ♠ Fat Larry's Band ♠ FCU777 ♠ Frank James ♠ Fresh Prince ♠ Freddie Gray ♠ Future the rapper ♠ G-Zay ♠ Gary Coleman ♠ Gazi Kodzo ♠ General Butt Naked ♠ George Floyd ♠ H2O ♠ Happy Negro ♠ Herman Cain ♠ Isaac Hayes ♠ IShowSpeed ♠ Ismaaiyl Brinsley ♠ Jada ♠ Jaden Smith ♠ James Watson ♠ Jay Bundy ♠ Jena Six ♠ Jeremiah True ♠ Jesse Jackson ♠ JinuSenpai ♠ Jkid ♠ Jordan Neely ♠ Joseph Kony ♠ Jussie Smollett ♠ Kamala Harris ♠ Kamala Harris (prostitute) ♠ Kanye West ♠ Kerney Thomas ♠ KingMasterReview ♠ Kobe Bryant ♠ Korryn Gaines ♠ KSI ♠ Latarian Milton ♠ Lee Rigby ♠ Liam Mango ♠ Lil B ♠ Linda Carty ♠ Loud Nigra ♠ Lowti3rgod ♠ M0M0ko ♠ MadThad0890 ♠ MajelaZeZeDiamond ♠ Malcolm X ♠ Marcellus Williams ♠ Mark Essex ♠ Martin Luther King, Jr. ♠ Martin Ssempa ♠ Marvin Morvan and Alex Teniola ♠ Mary Alice Altorfer ♠ Maurice Clemmons ♠ Maxine Waters ♠ MC Ride ♠ Meek Mill ♠ Micah Dawson ♠ Micah Johnson ♠ Michael Arega ♠ Michael Jackson ♠ Mike Tyson ♠ Mikese Morse ♠ Mintah ♠ Miss Landmine ♠ Monica Foster ♠ Mr.A.T.AndreiThomas ♠ Mr Pregnant ♠ Mr. T ♠ Muteba Kidiaba ♠ Mychal Bell ♠ NawlinWiki ♠ Nelson Mandela ♠ Nicki Minaj ♠ Nigger Pig ♠ Nocturnus Libertus ♠ Ntokozo Qwabe ♠ Rick Ross ♠ OFWGKTA ♠ OG Loc ♠ OJ Simpson ♠ Old Spice Guy ♠ Oliver Hart ♠ Omarosa ♠ Oprah Winfrey ♠ Orlando Harris ♠ P Diddy ♠ Professor Kuhtoons ♠ Purple Aki ♠ Queen Kong ♠ R. Kelly ♠ Rachel Dolezal ♠ Raven Williams ♠ Reverend X ♠ Rick James ♠ Robert Butler Jr. ♠ Rocky Lockridge ♠ Ron Mexico ♠ Rosa Parks ♠ Royce da 5'9" ♠ Rucas ♠ Rudy Eugene ♠ Sandro L Jean ♠ SapphyDracases ♠ Senator Barack Hussein Obama ♠ Shaun King ♠ Sheneequa ♠ Sonicfox ♠ SonicStrife ♠ Soulja Boy ♠ Starlaglam ♠ Steve Hodder-Watt ♠ Steve Stephens ♠ SubToDavidland ♠ Sweet Brown ♠ T-Pain ♠ Tacgnol ♠ Tarisai Vushe ♠ Tariq Nasheed ♠ Tawana Brawley ♠ Tay Zonday ♠ Tedius Zanarukando ♠ ThatKidDouglas ♠ The Black Sentinel ♠ The Booty Warrior ♠ The Central Park Five ♠ The Crackhead ♠ The Online Gamer ♠ The Trashman ♠ TheAdviseShow ♠ Therese Patricia Okoumou ♠ TheSuperRobotSoujaOG ♠ Tiger Woods ♠ Tommy Sotomayor ♠ Tony Eveready ♠ Tony48219 ♠ Tookie Williams ♠ Trayvon Martin ♠ Trevor Noah ♠ Twomad ♠ Tyler Lumar ♠ Tyra Banks ♠ Tyra Patterson ♠ UnMaskingTheTruth ♠ ValisHD ♠ Verbal Ase ♠ Viper ♠ Waluigis-girl ♠ Will Smith ♠ William Unek ♠ Wrong Location Nigger ♠ Xiao-Feng-Fury ♠ XXXTentacion ♠ Yasuke ♠ Zwarte Piet | |
Parlance |
Are You Serious? ♠ BECAUSE MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS LOUD ♠ Bix Nood ♠ Brraa pap pap pap ♠ BOOYA! ♠ Dat Ass ♠ DINDUNUFFIN ♠ Ebonics ♠ ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER DO YOU SPEAK IT ♠ First World Problems ♠ Flea Market Montgomery ♠ Fuck The Police ♠ George Bush doesn't care about black people ♠ Hack is Wack! ♠ Happy Negro ♠ I Go Chop Your Dollar ♠ Imma Let You Finish ♠ IM PRESSIN CHARGES ♠ Niggers tongue my anus ♠ Not racist ♠ Read a Book ♠ Scrub Me Mama With A Boogie Beat ♠ Sittin On Tha Toilet ♠ Smell yo dick ♠ Thanks Obama ♠ The Boondocks ♠ These Cuffs ♠ WHOO ♠ You'll Cowards Don't Even Smoke Crack | |
Pastimes |
365Black.com ♠ 419 Nigerian Email Scams ♠ Basketball ♠ Blackbird ♠ Booty Shaking ♠ Chikins ♠ Chimpout ♠ Conspiracy theories ♠ Dogo Nahawa Massacre ♠ Dolemite ♠ FUBU ♠ Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas ♠ Hypebeast ♠ Jenkem ♠ KFC Double Down ♠ Kool-Aid ♠ Linux for Niggers ♠ Nigga Know Technology ♠ Police Abolition ♠ Pool's Closed ♠ Racism ♠ Rap ♠ Rape ♠ Riots ♠ Soulja Boy Tellem Chat ♠ Street takeover ♠ Swag ♠ The Black Sentinel ♠ The Great Black Dick Hoax (see also Niggerdick and Niggercock) ♠ Twitter ♠ Ubuntu ♠ Voodoo ♠ Vuvuzela ♠ Watermelonz ♠ Will Smith slaps Chris Rock ♠ Worldstar Hiphop | |
Past |
BLACK FACE contempo ♠ Lynching ♠ NO NIGGERS ♠ Slavery (see also Nigger Manual) ♠ Vintage Black Americana | |
Present |
ADOS ♠ AIDS ♠ All The Niggers Are Dead ♠ Black People Love Us! ♠ Chocolate Rain ♠ Computer Science III ♠ Culexor ♠ Gay Nigger Association of America ♠ ISWAP ♠ Kwanzaa ♠ NAACP ♠ P.A. Palace ♠ Sheeeit ♠ There are no niggers on the Internet ♠ Unemployment ♠ and Welfare | |
Enemies |
A. Wyatt Mann ♠ Azn ♠ Buck Breakers ♠ Cops ♠ Chimpmania ♠ Don Imus ♠ Dylann Storm Roof ♠ Ebola virus ♠ Employment ♠ Epic Beard Man ♠ Graykat ♠ Illuminati ♠ James Watson ♠ Johnny Rebel ♠ Justine Sacco ♠ Ku Klux Klan ♠ Kramer ♠ Moonman ♠ Payton Gendron ♠ Popobawa ♠ Permit Patty ♠ Racism ♠ Ray Tensing ♠ Ryan Palmeter ♠ Shitskin Plantation ♠ Spics ♠ Stormfront ♠ The BLM Killer ♠ Total Nigger Death ♠ W ♠ White people |