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Genshin Impact: Difference between revisions
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{{spoiler|YOUR TWIN IS ACTUALLY THE LEADER OF THE FATUI, PAIMON IS SECRETLY [[Soup|EMERGENCY FOOD]], THE GODS ARE REBELLING AGAINST CELESTIA, AND FATUI ARE ACTUALLY THE [[Omg|GOOD GUYS]]!!!1!!1!}} | {{spoiler|YOUR TWIN IS ACTUALLY THE LEADER OF THE FATUI, PAIMON IS SECRETLY [[Soup|EMERGENCY FOOD]], THE GODS ARE REBELLING AGAINST CELESTIA, AND FATUI ARE ACTUALLY THE [[Omg|GOOD GUYS]]!!!1!!1!}} | ||
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[[Image:HomelessGenshinPlayer2.png|200px|thumb|right|Average Genshin Impact player in their natural environment]] | [[Image:HomelessGenshinPlayer2.png|200px|thumb|right|Average Genshin Impact player in their natural environment]] | ||
'''''Genshin Impact''''' is a [[The | '''''Genshin Impact''''' is a [[RPG|generic JRPG shat out by Chinks]] for PC, Gaystation, and mobile in the same year they caused Corona. The gameplay is your average RPG fodder, consisting of running around aimlessly, bullying innocent bystanders into submission, and skipping 99% of the [[Boring|amazing]] [[Visual novel|dialogue]]. [[Sarcasm|No wonder why]] this game got so many awards. The target audience are [[Neckbeard|well-adjusted members of society]] and [[Weebs|financially resposible adults]] like Tectone{{jew}} that want to spend [[Parents|their own]] money on the game to gamble for [[Gacha Life|fictional characters]]. | ||
<s>Mihoyo</s> Hoyoverse, the creator of this shitshow, gained millions of dollars upon release, however the game is still [[Shit|exacly the same it's always been]] with nothing to do. However, the most fun part about the game is its [[Autism|brainwashed fanbase]] full of [[Facts|screeching, toxic, room temperature IQ, LGBTQ supporting faggots]] that defend their perfect fictional [[Waifu|waifus/husbandos]] from the evil forces of [[Twatter]] and [[YouTube]]. | |||
== Plot == | == Plot == | ||
[[ | You and your twin are travelling through worlds, until some random god [[Rapes|defeats]] you both and sends you into a 500 year coma. Upon waking, you fish out your annoying tutorial companion called <s>Navi</s> [[Faggot|Paimon]] that's secretly a parrot because she literally repeats every story point 99 times for you as if you were a brainless ape. You then look for your twin, defeating some slimes and [[Niggers|local enemies]] on your way, and learn that the land of Teyvat you're in needs your help to stop Fatui from stealing everyone's [[Virginity|Gnosises]]. | ||
After that, you cross the 7 continents of Teyvat, getting raped by tentacle monsters and murdering innocent bystanders. | |||
== Gameplay == | |||
If you haven't already completed all story and exploration yet, all you do is participate in [[Depression|events]] - farming, photography, other useless nonsense, and maybe some fighting if you're [[Desperate|lucky]] enough. | |||
== Characters == | == Characters == | ||
[[Image: | [[Image:PaimonAtGunPoint.jpg|thumb|right|Everyone's reaction to Paimon]] | ||
* ''' | * '''Aether (Traveler)''' - The main protagonist. Talks about as little as that [[School shooter|weird silent guy]] at your school. Can somehow use all elements despite lacking a vision, but just like the player, he still [[You|fails at actually being useful at anything]]. | ||
* ''' | * '''Lumine (Traveler)''' - The twin you're trying to find/save so you can [[Twincest|continue where you last left off]]. However, if you're a [[Degenerate|degenerate]] that [[Loser|only chooses to play as female characters in games]], you can also play as her instead. | ||
* '''[[ | * '''[[Fag|Paimon]]''' - A rip-off of annoying fairy from [[The Legend of Zelda]] but as an annoying [[Loli]]. She gets an [[Erection|erection]] every time she sees food and [[Stfu|repeats the same points over and over to hammer in what was just said 6 seconds ago]]. Her only benefit is being emergency rations in case you ever get stranded on an island like Tom Hanks. | ||
* '''[[ | * '''[[Alcoholic|Venti]]''' - The God of [[Alcoholism|Freedom]], also known as that [[Gay|weird]] bard that spends every penny on getting [[Drunk|crunk]] at the tavern every night after spreading [[Herpes|Justin Bieber music]] across the city. His special power is [[Goatse|spreading his buttcheeks so wide]] that his anus creates a black hole that [[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING|sucks in everything that fits inside]]. Keep in mind that [[trap|Venti is literally a boy in female disguise]]. | ||
[[File:Genshin impact klee.png|right|200px|thumb|right|200px|<center>Klee: popular with people guilty of sex crime</center>]] | |||
* ''' | * '''[[Stoner|Zhongli]]''' - The God of [[Pyramid Scheme|Contracts]], the sugar daddy every female wants to be stepped on. His daily routine consists of [[Lazy|doing absolutely fucking nothing]] (or he's secretly [[Chad|slaying pussy of every female, including ur mom]]). He is also literally immortal. His special power is paralyzing you by slapping his [[McDonalds|trademark]] giant meatballs across your face. | ||
* '''[[ | * '''[[Loner|Raiden Shogun]]''' - The God of [[Virginity|Eternity]]. A hardcore [[Hikikomori]] that [[Useless|can't even cook her own food]]. She resides in her own schizo fantasyland. Like the audience of this game, she hasn't touched grass for thousands of years. Her special power is [[Plot|pulling a sword out from between her tits]] before turning [[Super Saiyan]] and then aimlessly swinging it around like [[Fag|Kirito]] from [[Sword Art Online]]. | ||
* '''[[ | * '''[[Loli|Klee]]''' - Klee is a fire character that is popular with [[Pedophiles]], [[Lesbian]]s, and [[Transgender|Transfilth]] because they like her small, Childlike stature which means she can be easily overpowered by an adult and be forced to take all their [[Semen|Monkey Gravy]] on her face or have her face held down into a [[Lesbian|Dike's]] crotch until she gets the idea that she is supposed to eat [[France|the snail]]. For these freaks, they get the best of both worlds because [[Brain|mentally]] she is 7 but physically she is [[At least 100]]. If you really want to see how low these degenerates will go, just do a '''Hashtag Search''' for Klee on [[Twitter]], during [[Halloween]] and read thoughts from these [[Sick fuck]]s detailing how'd they'd get her into their House/Basement, by promising her really good candy or money, and what'd they'd do once she's in their house and under their power. | ||
== Fanbase == | == Fanbase == | ||
{{moar|of this section, right here officer}} | |||
The worst example of what a massive group of people with [[Down Syndrome|mental disabilities]] looks like. | The worst example of what a massive group of people with [[Down Syndrome|mental disabilities]] looks like. | ||
* {{kf|95546| A Kiwifarms thread discussion about how autistic a fandom can be. Right here, officer.}} | |||
== See also == | == See also == | ||
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{{anime}} | {{anime}} | ||
{{dying alone}} | {{dying alone}} | ||
{{ | {{Qing}} | ||
{{Azn}} | |||
{{Pedoseries}} | |||
[[Category:2020]] | |||
[[Category:Gaming]] |
Latest revision as of 08:24, 10 June 2024
Hey! | This article isn't lulz just yet, but its coverage can spark a lollercoaster. You can help by reverting people who delete shit, and vandalizing their user pages. See this article on Google? Want to add something? Join us! |
Genshin Impact is a generic JRPG shat out by Chinks for PC, Gaystation, and mobile in the same year they caused Corona. The gameplay is your average RPG fodder, consisting of running around aimlessly, bullying innocent bystanders into submission, and skipping 99% of the amazing dialogue. No wonder why this game got so many awards. The target audience are well-adjusted members of society and financially resposible adults like Tectone✡ that want to spend their own money on the game to gamble for fictional characters.
Mihoyo Hoyoverse, the creator of this shitshow, gained millions of dollars upon release, however the game is still exacly the same it's always been with nothing to do. However, the most fun part about the game is its brainwashed fanbase full of screeching, toxic, room temperature IQ, LGBTQ supporting faggots that defend their perfect fictional waifus/husbandos from the evil forces of Twatter and YouTube.
Plot
You and your twin are travelling through worlds, until some random god defeats you both and sends you into a 500 year coma. Upon waking, you fish out your annoying tutorial companion called Navi Paimon that's secretly a parrot because she literally repeats every story point 99 times for you as if you were a brainless ape. You then look for your twin, defeating some slimes and local enemies on your way, and learn that the land of Teyvat you're in needs your help to stop Fatui from stealing everyone's Gnosises.
After that, you cross the 7 continents of Teyvat, getting raped by tentacle monsters and murdering innocent bystanders.
Gameplay
If you haven't already completed all story and exploration yet, all you do is participate in events - farming, photography, other useless nonsense, and maybe some fighting if you're lucky enough.
Characters
- Aether (Traveler) - The main protagonist. Talks about as little as that weird silent guy at your school. Can somehow use all elements despite lacking a vision, but just like the player, he still fails at actually being useful at anything.
- Lumine (Traveler) - The twin you're trying to find/save so you can continue where you last left off. However, if you're a degenerate that only chooses to play as female characters in games, you can also play as her instead.
- Paimon - A rip-off of annoying fairy from The Legend of Zelda but as an annoying Loli. She gets an erection every time she sees food and repeats the same points over and over to hammer in what was just said 6 seconds ago. Her only benefit is being emergency rations in case you ever get stranded on an island like Tom Hanks.
- Venti - The God of Freedom, also known as that weird bard that spends every penny on getting crunk at the tavern every night after spreading Justin Bieber music across the city. His special power is spreading his buttcheeks so wide that his anus creates a black hole that sucks in everything that fits inside. Keep in mind that Venti is literally a boy in female disguise.
- Zhongli - The God of Contracts, the sugar daddy every female wants to be stepped on. His daily routine consists of doing absolutely fucking nothing (or he's secretly slaying pussy of every female, including ur mom). He is also literally immortal. His special power is paralyzing you by slapping his trademark giant meatballs across your face.
- Raiden Shogun - The God of Eternity. A hardcore Hikikomori that can't even cook her own food. She resides in her own schizo fantasyland. Like the audience of this game, she hasn't touched grass for thousands of years. Her special power is pulling a sword out from between her tits before turning Super Saiyan and then aimlessly swinging it around like Kirito from Sword Art Online.
- Klee - Klee is a fire character that is popular with Pedophiles, Lesbians, and Transfilth because they like her small, Childlike stature which means she can be easily overpowered by an adult and be forced to take all their Monkey Gravy on her face or have her face held down into a Dike's crotch until she gets the idea that she is supposed to eat the snail. For these freaks, they get the best of both worlds because mentally she is 7 but physically she is At least 100. If you really want to see how low these degenerates will go, just do a Hashtag Search for Klee on Twitter, during Halloween and read thoughts from these Sick fucks detailing how'd they'd get her into their House/Basement, by promising her really good candy or money, and what'd they'd do once she's in their house and under their power.
Fanbase
This article needs moar of this section, right here officer. You can help by adding moar of this section, right here officer. |
The worst example of what a massive group of people with mental disabilities looks like.
See also
- Down Syndrome: The disease that everyone in this fanbase suffers
Genshin Impact is part of a series on Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage. |
Genshin Impact is part of a series on Visit the Anime Portal for complete coverage. |
Genshin Impact is part of a series on "The Qing of Encyclopedia Dramatica" |
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