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Ethan Miller
|
| Ethan Blair Miller | |
|---|---|
| Born | October 31, 2001 |
| Died | August 28, 2022 (aged 20) |
| Nationality: | Americunt |
| Occupation | Grocery store employee |
| Highscore | Killed 2, injured 2 |
| Top 50? | Nope |
| Style | FPS, Single player |
| An Hero? | Yes |
| Motive | Kicks & Thrillz |
Ethan Blair Miller
(a.k.a. WrathOfMan22) was a Columbine-obsessed maniac with pent-up virgin rage from Bend Over, Oregon, who went postal at a supermarket so he could be with his imaginary soulmate when he inevitably an hero'd at the end. Originally, Ethan Miller wanted to emulate a school shooting at his old high school at Mountain View High School when the first day of school rolled around (Zero Day: Sep. 8) yet was so timidly impatient that he decided to pull a fast one on his workplace at a Safeway instead. This change of plans was not all in vain however as the CCTV footage of the attack is probably the second-best video of a supermarket rampage to ever be released to the public. Miller staved his anger exclusively on the most Columbinesque music imaginable such as KMFDM, Disturbed and especially Nine Inch Nails, so much so that he even titled his manifesto, "The Downward Spiral of Ethan Miller", after one of their albums. His manifesto was a private document written within Wattpad and received entries from June 29th to August 27th; its contents are half misanthropic rambling and half song lyrics. Before the COVID lockdowns, Miller enjoyed fixating his anger into mixed martial arts and he attributes the lockdowns as an extremely formative event to him; thus going to show that the real danger during the COVID pandemic wasn't the disease itself but the killers that its mishandling has procured.
Loadout
Day of Fun
Ethan Millard initially began buying up guns in secret with the intent to shoot up his old high school but settled for going postal at his workplace at the local Safeway because the build-up of rage was making him too timid to wait. Alas, Ethen Miller started his mission by occupying his two inventory slots with his AR-15 and 12 gauge shotgun, leaving the sawed-off shotgun and the molotovs behind. He then proceeded to increase his awareness meter by applying three bullet holes to his car and then shooting at a bunch of random shit on his way to the Safeway. He injured the driver of a moving black Honda Civic with glass and shrapnel as he shot through the passenger-side window, but didn't shoot at it long enough to trigger an explosion as vehicles are known to do. He then stopped for a side quest shooting into the windows of an adjacent store before getting on with it. Upon reaching the entrance, he fired 5 rounds into a Korean War veteran displaying the gamertag Glenn Edward Bennett, whose health was eventually depleted because he couldn't find any healies. Proceeding further into the store, Millard begins firing a bunch of free-flyers down the aisles. Now making his way down the meat aisle, he finds a man lying on the ground and fires a round next to him just to fuck with him but doesn't kill him, then proceeds to make a glass-shattering spectacle shooting at refrigerators further down the aisle in pursuit of maximum destruction. Then suddenly out of nowhere, A challenger appears! A small-town hero named Donald Ray Surrett Jr. (who is a sex-offender btw) lounged at him with a produce knife in an attempt to disarm him and was partially successful, forcing Millard to drop his shotgun. Unfortunately for Surrett, he still had his backup rifle which he used to incapacitate Surrett. Millard picked his shotgun back up and gave him a double whammy of it. Finally, Millard leaves the rifle behind and immediately gives himself shotgun mouthwash the moment cops charge into the building, ensuring his an hero bonus points. The visceral volcano effect can only be imagined, but it must have been spectacularly ejaculative.
Graded Score
| Kill count: | 2/20 2 injured |
|---|---|
| Accuracy: | 1/20 Fired 100+ rounds. Literally just dilly dallying with his ammo supply. |
| Style: | 10/20 Just for the hell of it. |
| Butthurt: | 1/20 "thoughts and prayers" |
| Bonus: | 10/20 an hero |
Gallery
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Miller in happier times
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Three holes that Ethan Miller shot into his own car.
See Also
External Links
| Columbine: |
Columbine • Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold • Super Columbine Massacre RPG • Do you believe in god • Columbine Copycats • Columbine Gallery • Columbiners | |
|---|---|---|
| Admirers |
Adam Lanza • Alex Hribal • Artyom Kazantsev • Asa Coon • Alek Minassian • Audrey Hale • Bob8466 • Brooke Higgins & Sienna Johnson • Cho Seung-Hui • Dillon Cossey • Ichverbot • Jaylen Fryberg • Jeff Weise • Kimveer Gill • Lindsay Kantha Souvannarath • Lynn Ann • Natalie Rupnow • Neocities • Nghtmrchld26 • Pekka-Eric Auvinen • Robert Butler Jr. • Robert Hawkins • Robert Steinhäuser • Ryan Schallenberger • Sebastian Bosse • Sol Pais • TheAmazingAtheist • Tim Kretschmer • Vladislav Roslyakov • William Atchison • You | |
| Locations: |
Colorado • United States • School • Suburbs | |
| Related: |
Doom • Police Brutality • Postal • School Shooting • Mass Shooting • Video games • Trenchcoat • Marilyn Manson • KMFDM • Rammstein • Faggoth • Concerned Mother • Newgrounds • Ryan Lambourn • School Shooter: North American Tour 2012 • The Matrix • South Park • Michael Moore • Quentin Tarantino • 1990s • Jack Thompson • Gun control |
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Ethan Miller |
|
| Spree/One-time Killers: |
Aaron Alexis • Adam Lanza • Alex Hribal • Alyssa Bustamante • Anthony Warner • Audrey Hale • Bruce Jeffrey Pardo • Casey Anthony • Cho Seung-Hui • Devin Patrick Kelley • Dylan Klebold • Dylann Storm Roof • Eric Harris • Gerry McCann • James Holmes • Jared Lee Loughner • Jason Rodriguez • Jeff Weise • Jiverly Voong • Joe Stack • Josef Fritzl • Laaiti Ekenstéen • Mark Essex • Martin Bryant • Matthew de Grood • Matthew Murray • Matti Saari • Maurice Clemmons • Nicholas Prosper • Pekka-Eric Auvinen • Peter Scully • Raoul Moat • Richard Speck • Robert Hawkins • Stephen Paddock • Tim Kretschmer • Timothy Hendron • TJ Lane • Tyler Peterson • Wade Michael Page • Woo Bum-kon | |
|---|---|---|
| Career/Serial Killers: |
Academy Maniacs • Adolf Hitler • Charles Manson • Chris Benoit • Dnepropetrovsk Maniacs • Dubya • Jack the Ripper • Jeffrey Dahmer • Mao Zedong • Richard "The Iceman" Kuklinski • Ted Bundy | |
| Terrorists: |
Al Qaeda • Anders Behring Breivik • Anderson Lee Aldrich • Anton Lundin Pettersson • Dzhokhar Tsarnaev • Elliot Rodger • George Sodini • Maniacs Murder Cult • Mark Essex • Nidal Malik Hasan • Osama bin Laden • Tamerlan Tsarnaev • Ted Kaczynski | |
| See also: |
Antisocial personality disorder • Jews • Murder • Paranoid personality disorder • Pittsburgh Paint Job • Police Brutality • Sick fuck |






