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Nietzsche: Difference between revisions
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*[[Ayn Rand]] read Nietzsche and Crowley and didn't get it, so she created a fucked up version of Nietzsche's and Crowley's already fucked-up ideologies and called it Objectivism.<br> | *[[Ayn Rand]] read Nietzsche and Crowley and didn't get it, so she created a fucked up version of Nietzsche's and Crowley's already fucked-up ideologies and called it Objectivism.<br> | ||
*Anton LaVey read Nietzsche, Crowley and Rand and didn't get any of it, so he created a fucked up version of those already fucked-up ideologies and called it The Church of Satan.<br> | *Anton LaVey read Nietzsche, Crowley and Rand and didn't get any of it, so he created a fucked up version of those already fucked-up ideologies and called it The Church of Satan.<br> | ||
===<center>From Nietzsche to Ayn Rand to LeVey.</center>=== | |||
[[Image:MemeCreation.jpg|thumb|500px|center|A useful illustration.]] | |||
So the next time you wonder why Marilyn Manson acts like a confused, pretentious douche....blame Fred Nietzsche and his syphilitic wang.<br> | So the next time you wonder why Marilyn Manson acts like a confused, pretentious douche....blame Fred Nietzsche and his syphilitic wang.<br> | ||
Also, [[Adolf Hitler]] didn't get it either. Why, you ask? | Also, [[Adolf Hitler]] didn't get it either. Why, you ask? | ||
Revision as of 02:23, 24 September 2012
Friedrich Nietzsche was a poor, crippled, crazy bastard of a philosopher who spent his entire life trying to prove to the masses that God is dead, that we can all rise to the level of the Übermensch, that women are useless, and that the Christians were forcing us all to become pussies. He wrote countless undecipherable books and convinced most people he was insane before actually obliging them. He spent the last ten years of his life in bed shitting himself and rambling incoherently before God decided to send him down to hell. Apparently, a bunch of fucking retards think Nietzsche is the most important thinker of the 19th Century, and helped carve Western Philosophy. However true this is, Nietzsche was a fag who deserved death because he couldn't write or think. Some morons think the term "Ubermensch" was hijacked by Adolf Hitler, but this was for the lulz - Nietzsche hated Jews but didn't have the balls to admit it. Well... now humanity knows what happens when some bitchmade cracker takes metaphorical beliefs literally.
Mein Leben
Nietzsche grew up in some desolate, nameless, shithole village in an even bigger shithole known as Germany. He was a big lover of the Jesus as a child, but gave up that half-twisted lifestyle after his dad croaked. He later went to school to study the Greeks, but found that doing philosophy was an even bigger waste of time (the first evidence of his amazing thinking powers). Nevertheless, being the anti-establishment angst riddled teen he was, decided to go for it. He spent the rest of his life being pissed, not getting laid (except for that hooker that gave him syphilis), writing books, being moar pissed, and spending his twilight years pissing himself uncontrollably. According to some, right before he collapsed and became an invalid, he was in a market square talking to a horse. The horse was being beaten and he tried to protect it, and started sobbing uncontrollably. Noone knows what was said between Fred and the horse, but knowing his heritage one can make an educated guess.
After Nietzsche's death, his sister stole his philosophy and rewrote it to fit in with der Führer's ideology. Of course she did it for the lulz (and Jew gold) !
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Philosophizing
Nietzsche spent his entire life writing many tl;dr books in which he rants/complains/bitches/moans about how everybody else has it all wrong. This is obviously not the proper place to try to give a thorough analysis of his writings, but we can go over some of the more lulzy parts.
False Idols
Nietzsche was not a big fan of God. Particularly, the God of the Christian variety (no word on what his take was on Raptor Jesus). He felt that belief in God would allow all the weak scum in the world to usurp power from those that have rightfully claimed it. He described two types of morality: master and slave. The master morality consists of all those who possess the muscle to raep, pillage, and otherwise pwn the weak. By contrast, the slave morality are those receiving said rape. According to Nietzsche, this is human nature and therefore all good. What fucks everything up is Jesus coming along and saying things like "the meek shall inherit the Earth." This is nothing more than BAWWW designed by pussies who are butthurt over getting pwned and raped for all their worth. Later on, this ideal is adapted by the Church to trick the strong into acting weak and therefore becoming pussies themselves.
Thus Spoke Zarathustra or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Superman
Considered by many to be his most influential work, this is basically a padded out guide on how to do it for the lulz. It consists of Zarathustra trolling everything in existence, talking about how much God is a fag, and Zarathustra being better than Jesus. Although long and full of rhetorical nonsense that nobody sober or sane would understand, it does contain alot of lulzy material, like how all woman are stupid bitches, how Jewish people are dong-eating trilobites and that anything not done for the lulz is retarded and pointless. In other words, it was the original ED. SPOILER ALERT: It ends with a bunch of oldfags jerking each other off in a cave and then being scared off by a lion. Didn't that explain everything?
Superman
The Übermensch/superman/overman is Nietzsche's term for what we as humans should strive to become. This is a metaphysical concept that basically goes like this: Since we crawled out of the sludge, man has made strives forward. We went from being unthinking beasts consumed with cravings of rape and murder, to thinking men consumed with...rape and murder. It's this progression which Nietzsche is getting at. So where we are right now as humans is not an end result of where we came from, but rather a middle point on the way to something better. And what is that something better? Well it's having an acute awareness of this process, and embracing it whole-heartily as we go about our raping and murdering. It's not holding ourselves back by being moralfags or helping anyone else out. It's basically all the things which the oldfags of b encompass. So for example, everyone who tried to protect boxxy, or felt some deep sort of moral righteousness by protesting Scientology, were doing it wrong.
The Übermensch/superman/overman is, in fact, among the less developed of Nietzsche's concepts, and is bound to be misrepresented by anyone other than the editors of the omniscient Wikipedia.
Wiminz
tl;dr Version
Stop being such a god fearing pussy, kick everyone's ass and steal their stuff, then go home and rape your baby factory whore of a wife who you keep tied up in the kitchen.
On The Internets
Nietzsche is very big with the goths, emos, and basement dwellers the world over. Regardless which one of the social networks you pick, there's bound to be some acne covered virgin with "When you look into the abyss, the abyss looks back unto you" as their favorite quote. Somehow it seems to always be easier to just steal other people's thoughts rather than having an original idea of your own. Unfortunately, it seems that none of these thieving little fucks have ever bothered to actually pick of one of Nietzsche's books since that would require diverting their attention away from their Twitter. This becomes apparent when said goth, emo ,etc. can't even begin to explain what they are actually quoting or how they're doing it wrong. But let's be absolutely honest with ourselves here; who has time to read old media when you have to post about how your boyfriend totally doesn't understand you and why it is important that he fork over the money for your botox procedure. "But like OMG this Nietzsche guy totally knows where I'm coming from. It's like we're totally kindred spirits."
The Beauty Of Art
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Nietzsche, resurrected and merged with steel -
wut? -
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Sick ink brah!
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The furries ruin everything once again. -
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Not understanding what books are for.
Jewtubes
Here are some of the more fucktarded videos on Nietzsche hiding out in the tubes:
Previous Video | Next Video
- Click the following for some horrible music video/quote montage.
A Final Word
Some think that if Nietzsche were alive today he'd actually be the gothest, most emo-est motherfucker on the e-block. But Fred would disagree. To Quote from Thus Spoke Zarathustra - The Preachers of death:
—pwning Gothfags and Emo fucktards | ||
Conclusion
- Nietzsche was a cranky, curmudgeonly crazy man who thought people sucked and there was no reason to not be an asshole.
- Aleister Crowley read Nietzsche and didn't get it, so he created a fucked up version of Nietzsche's already fucked-up ideology and called it Thelema.
- Ayn Rand read Nietzsche and Crowley and didn't get it, so she created a fucked up version of Nietzsche's and Crowley's already fucked-up ideologies and called it Objectivism.
- Anton LaVey read Nietzsche, Crowley and Rand and didn't get any of it, so he created a fucked up version of those already fucked-up ideologies and called it The Church of Satan.
From Nietzsche to Ayn Rand to LeVey.
So the next time you wonder why Marilyn Manson acts like a confused, pretentious douche....blame Fred Nietzsche and his syphilitic wang.
Also, Adolf Hitler didn't get it either. Why, you ask?
That's why.
See also
Links
- Even Nietzsche has a Myspace
- A Facebook is fine too
- Nietzsche Message Board
- Get quotes for your Myspace page fgt
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Nietzsche is part of a series on Visit the Truth Portal for complete coverage. |
| Featured article October 6, 2005 | ||
| Preceded by I did it for the lulz |
Nietzsche | Succeeded by Weblog |