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Revision as of 04:20, 18 November 2014

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Jeff Weise (aka weise) was an honest-to-God Injun, as well as an angsty teen from Minnesota. These three defining characteristics --His Injun-hood, his angsty teen-hood, and his Minnessotan-hood-- formed the greatest trifecta of Native American rage since Geronimo, leading to the Red Lake High School shoot'em-up. Like most angsty teens and all High School shooters, Jeff was a massive fanboi of famous celebrities Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold.

The IRL drama

Traditional native headdress

.

   
 
I try not to be aggressive in most situations, I'll use force if I have to, but I'm not about to go out and pick a fight. I'm mostly defensive, I'll defend myself if someone tries something but other than that I'm a peaceful person.
 

 
 

—Jeff Weise, moments before starting a shoot-out with the cops.

On March 21, 2005, Weise stole 2 handguns and a shotgun and pwned his grandparents. He then stole his grandfather's police cruiser, crashed it into his school, and pwned 7 more classmates before self-pwning. Newspapers and TV stations around the nation immediately jumped on the story and masturbated furiously to the topic of school-shootings and violence for several weeks until, flushed and weak in the knees, they finally moved back to the severely more important news schedule of arbitrary missing white women and Lindsay Lohan's latest eating disorder. Naturally, this brief media frenzy ensured a new round of pointless IRL drama combined with the typical routine criticism of Marilyn Manson and the temporary banning of all Hot Topic merchandise from school grounds. Somewhere along the line, some concerned mothers probably got involved as well, but that's shit only they care about.

On the Internets

Weise updating his LJ profile.

Before killing himself, Weise was known for his various activities on the internets. He made many posts on various Nazi websites (knowing that Hitler didn't give a fuck about Native Americans and only cared about Germany). Weise also created several violent flash videos on Newgrounds and started an LJ account, where he made 3 brief posts inquiring about cutting, alcoholism, grammatical errors, and other shit nobody cares about.

If the best you could do was this, you'd be pretty upset too

.

Graded Score

Graded score
Kills: 9/20
Accuracy: 15/20
Style: 18/20 bonus for looting armor & gun from guard
Butthurt: 17/20 Caused a moderate shitstorm. Nobody was white so noone cared.
Bonus: 18/20
Stopped his suicide attempt and saved up his angst for greater things.
Total score: 77/100 (C)
Maybe if you were white someone would care..

Gallery

External links

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Adam LanzaAnders Behring BreivikAndrew KehoeAriana Grande MassacreBaruch GoldsteinBrenton TarrantCampo Elías DelgadoCho Seung-HuiDevin Patrick KelleyDong YanglingGabriel WortmanJack Gilbert GrahamJakrapanth ThommaJames HubertyLuby's massacreMartin BryantMutsuo ToiNice Truck Attack 2016Omar MateenPanya KhamrabPatrick CrusiusReina Nightclub MassacreSalvador RamosShinji AobaStephen PaddockTed BundyVladislav RoslyakovWilliam UnekWoo Bum-kon

Single Player Amateur Division

Aaron AlexisAlexandre BissonnetteAkbarzhon JalivovAli David SonbolyAnderson Lee AldrichAndrea PignaniAnton Lundin PetterssonArtyom KazantsevAudrey HaleBrandon Scott HoleBreda Highschool MassacreBreitscheidplatzBrenda Ann SpencerBruce Jeffrey PardoCapital Gazette ShootingCharles Whitman's TumorChris Harper-MercerConnor BettsDallas Police ShootingsDarrell BrooksDavid KatzDavid KozákDavid Malcolm GrayDeath to Traitors, Freedom for BritainDerrick BirdDeWayne CraddockDimitrios PagourtzisDimitrious GargasoulasDmitry VinogradovDylann Storm RoofElliot RodgerÉric BorelEuler Fernando GrandolphoFlemming NielsenFort HoodGabe ParkerGeorge SodiniGian Luigi FerriIan David LongIlnaz GalyavievJake DavisonJames Alex FieldsJames HolmesJared Lee LoughnerJason DaltonJason RodriguezJaylen FrybergJeffrey DahmerJeff WeiseJesse OsborneJiverly VoongJoe StackJohn Russell HouserJohn Wilkes BoothJonathan SapirmanJosef FritzlKhalid MasoodKimveer GillKip KinkelKongsberg Bow and Arrow RampageLam Kor WanMamoru TakumaMarc LépineMark BartonMark EssexMartin PeyerlMatthew de GroodMichael CarnealMichael Kenneth McLendonMichael RyanMikese MorseMr. SaariNathan GaleNghtmrchld26Nikolas CruzNoah EsbensenOrlando HarrisOtoya YamaguchiPatrick PurdyPayton GendronPekka-Eric AuvinenPetri GerdtRamadan Van ManRandy Robert StairRichard SpeckRobert BalesRobert BowersRobert CardRobert CrimoRobert HawkinsRobert LongRobert SteinhäuserRuslan AkhtyamovRyan PalmeterSantino William LeganSatoshi UematsuSayfullo SaipovStephen KazmierczakThe Twinkie ManThomas Matthew CrooksThomas Watt HamiltonTim KretschmerTimothy HendronTimur BekmansurovTJ LaneTobias RathjenTrystan Andrew TerrellTyler PetersonUnabomberWade Michael PageWalter SeifertWellington Menezes de OliveiraZhao ZeweiZug Massacre

Multiplayer Co-Op Mode

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Civilization and Great Prophets

Adolf HitlerAugusto PinochetAum ShinrikyoCharles MansonHeaven's GateHolocaustJonestownJoseph StalinKim Il-sungMao ZedongOsama bin LadenPol PotSaddam HusseinWacoWorld War II

Banned From Scoring

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SchutzstaffelIdeologie, Tradition, Praxis, und StolzMöchtegern-NazisFeinde, Verräter, und verboten

YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND ME!
YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND ME!
Jeff Weise is part of a series on
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[BleedCut]
Your best friend.
Your best friend.
Jeff Weise is part of a series on Psychopaths
[It rubs the lotion on the skin or else it gets the hose againOpen the box]
Spree/One-time Killers:

Aaron AlexisAdam LanzaAlex HribalAlyssa BustamanteAnthony WarnerAudrey HaleBruce Jeffrey PardoCasey AnthonyCho Seung-HuiDevin Patrick KelleyDylan KleboldDylann Storm RoofEric HarrisGerry McCannJames HolmesJared Lee LoughnerJason RodriguezJeff WeiseJiverly Voong Joe StackJosef FritzlLaaiti EkenstéenMark EssexMartin BryantMatthew de GroodMatthew MurrayMatti SaariMaurice ClemmonsPekka-Eric AuvinenRaoul MoatRichard SpeckRobert HawkinsStephen PaddockTim KretschmerTimothy HendronTJ LaneTyler PetersonWade Michael PageWoo Bum-kon

Career/Serial Killers:

Academy ManiacsAdolf HitlerCharles MansonChris BenoitDnepropetrovsk ManiacsDubyaJack the RipperJeffrey DahmerMao ZedongRichard "The Iceman" KuklinskiTed Bundy

Terrorists:

Al QaedaAnders Behring BreivikAnderson Lee AldrichAnton Lundin PetterssonDzhokhar TsarnaevElliot RodgerGeorge SodiniManiacs Murder CultMark EssexNidal Malik HasanOsama bin LadenTamerlan TsarnaevTed Kaczynski

See also:

Antisocial personality disorderJewsMurderParanoid personality disorderPittsburgh Paint JobPolice BrutalitySick fuck

I WILL NOT KILL MY CLASSMATES...
I WILL NOT KILL MY CLASSMATES...
Jeff Weise is part of a series on
GOTH
[Grow up and quit whiningEmbrace your inner darkness]
I WILL NOT KILL MY CLASSMATES...
I WILL NOT KILL MY CLASSMATES...

Perverts

Don HenrieJerry from Doomsday Refreshment CommitteeJonathon The InhalerLustiferaMichelle BelangerRyle Garamonde

Pussies

Brittany HolechkoDimmuborgiressIckeriss69KurtBatzLarathenMatt CrimminsMissHannahMinxMsUmlautNeil GaimanNickolausPaulie CalafioreSinnSophie LancasterSuccubbusTrent Reznor

Psychos

GothzillaHouse KheperuJeff WeiseJasmine RichardsonKimveer GillLindsay Kantha SouvannarathMemoryandDreamPink SpiderSephirothslaveSebastian BosseTodd Hoyt

Posers

Dani FilthEx-RayeFesazukichanJack SpicerJetTheeReaperPaganDeathKnightTooDamnFilthyVoodoo devil dollYouZeriara

Places

BasementsColumbineDeadJournalGoth macrosHot TopicRichland Collegiate High SchoolVampire Community Message BoardVampire FreaksVampire PosersVampire Shitty

Pastimes

Aiding the Dark Lord in BattleAngstBeing EdgyCuttingDrugsGuroHomosexualityNeil Gaiman's SandmanNecrophiliaNot having friendsMurderMy ImmortalPoetryRuining the InternetSchool ShootingSuicideThe Nightmare Before ChristmasVampirismWhere The Dead Go To DieRuby Gloom

Noise

Anal CuntThe CureDoomsday Refreshment CommitteeDr. SteelDream TheaterEmilie AutumnGothic RockJoy DivisionMisfitsNew RomanticNINThe Sisters of MercySiouxsie and The BansheesSlipknotTool