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Diaper Boy
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This person has Assburgers Syndrome, so you can't say anything bad! :-( Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck. |
In April 2011, a YouTube account was created under the name of ABoatsABoat whose sole purpose was to document and share the behavior of one very special Canadian boy, Christopher. The person who registered the account, Jeff, was the boy's older brother and the videos he began to post confirmed for the world once and for all that Canada really is nothing but a nation of lazy good for nothing pants-shitters. After having had to put up with his younger brother's bullshit for more than 10 long years, he finally snapped and decided to teach the little fucker a lesson. His plan was simple: Show the world how much of a faggot his little brother was, and in the process laugh as the fat little piggy cried about it.
This, on its own, is nothing special as brothers have been flaming one another on the internet since the days of newsgroups and dial up modems. What makes Jeff, but more importantly, Christopher, so special are the diapers. Lots and lots of shit filled diapers. Diapers that Christopher wears all day, everyday and not just as a fashion statement. Jeff's younger brother likes to poop on the run so to speak. After all, nothing in the world is better than dropping a deuce as you battle Bowser on your Nintendo Gamecube. GO CANADA!
I Shit Therefor I Am
— Jeff Explaining Why His Little Brother Smells Like Shit | ||
To truly understand the philosophy of a young boy who shits himself on a daily basis, you must first see for yourself how he lives. You must put yourself in his diapers, crap from his perspective, and ring the magic bell which brings mommy to clean up all the ick. Truly this boy is blessed and Jeff's magical videos have only helped to share that message.
The internet, being what it is, seized upon the account with remarkable speed and the videos quickly began to grow in popularity. Soon Jeff's younger brother, a pants shitting gamer, attracted the attention of boards like /v/ who saw in the 10 year old reflections of times past. And for a little while, the green text gave way to brown as the /v/irgins debated whether or not shitting oneself and having others clean it up for you was a good thing.
With the surge in attention, Jeff began to grow bolder, posting more and more videos all featuring his loveable, fat fuck of deuce-dropping little brother. The internet applauded as they were treated to a show they would not soon forget. In each and every video, the pooping bandit threw fits as he shit himself over and over again, raging at the smallest little thing and demanding that his mommy lick his shit up and wear a smile while she did it. Mommy obliged.
Perhaps one day future students will study Jeff's younger brother like college students study Socrates today. After all both like to shit themselves and didn't really give a fuck what others thought about it.
Shitting Is Believing
The following is but one of the many videos currently available on ABoatIsABoat's YouTube channel. It showcases his brother's calm and respectful attitude when dealing with adversities. During the video we see Jeff's younger brother going about his typical day of smack talking their mother and telling the whore to do what he wants when he wants it or else. Truly a charming young man. See if you can spot the moment in the video when he unloads his bowels into his Huggies.
Butt Wait, There's More
Since the account's, there has been some speculation that perhaps the whole account is a set up; that just maybe this is all some elaborate attempt at gaining views in hopes of promoting some future endeavor or product. This of course is complete and utter dumbfuckery and only a raving lunatic would believe such a thing. Yet, still some choose to push the issue claiming that there is no way a real situation like this could continue on without someone beating the fuck out of the little bastard.
The facts in all of this are few, but what is known are that the family reside in Canada. Both brothers lived with their mother whom was divorced from the father (surprise, surprise), and shared a room together. Jeff is 16 years old, Christopher is 10, and their mother? Who knows. In each of the videos, we see Christopher and/or their mother, but not Jeff himself. While retreated away from the battlefield, he showed his facewhen he no longer had to wear a gas mask due to the shit fumes. While it could be possible that this is all fake, it could also be possible that my cock shoots out lighting when I get angry, or that my ass holds the secret to who shot Kennedy. Anything's possible. But what's most probable is that it would be highly unlikely for an advertising firm to show an underage child running around with diapers full of fake shit, and then paste his face all over the internet in an attempt to sell car insurance. I really doubt Geico needs these two faggots to make a buck.
Jeff has recently stated that he has moved in with his father and so videos will be released approximately once a month. What this means for the future of the YouTube account and his little brother's rising notority is unknown. Whether or not the 10 year old pooping bandit will finally get his diapers shoved down his fat pre-neckbearded throat no can say. All we can do is hope that when it does reach critical mass, that Jeff is there to tape it for us.
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