Cyberpunk 2077: Difference between revisions
imported>Dancing Spiderman No edit summary |
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[[File: Cyberpunk 2077.jpg|right|thumb| Fail]] | [[File: Cyberpunk 2077.jpg|right|thumb| Fail]] | ||
'''Cyberpunk 2077''' was supposed the [[lie|biggest game evar]] made by the once thought be god and savior [[disgraced|CD Projekt Red]]. People were hyped over everything about this game. They would loose [[there]] shit from a glimpse of this game. People were breathtaken from [[Keanu Reeves]]. | |||
When the game came out it | When the game came out it turned out that [[fail|no one could fucking play it]], [[rich people|unless you are rich as fuck]]. [[Neckbeard| Neckbeard gamers]] raged everywhere and burst into flames, having a meltdown and spamming everywhere online about how ''"CD PROJEKT RED ARE TRAITORS"'' and humanity is doomed. [[Sony]] took the game off the [[PlayStation Network|PlayStation Store]] and to stop more cancerous gamers from emerging all companies gave out refunds (not [[lie|"good guy"]] [[Microsoft]] though, they're greedy). CD Projekt Red is now under investigation and class action lawsuits from the [[FBI]] for fraud. The world will be in rage for [[forever|the rest of time]] as people will never forget about CD Projekt Red's forbidden crimes. | ||
==Reveal== | ==Reveal== | ||
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<noinclude>[[Category:Notice Templates|{{PAGENAME}}]]</noinclude> | <noinclude>[[Category:Notice Templates|{{PAGENAME}}]]</noinclude> | ||
At [[Convention|E3]] people saw a trailer that made their worship for CD Project Red skyrocket, but then Keanu Reeves | At [[Convention|E3]] people saw a trailer that made their worship for CD Project Red skyrocket, but then Keanu Reeves got on stage and people lost their shit. | ||
<center><youtube>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7-qaRs3XxQ</youtube></center> | <center><youtube>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7-qaRs3XxQ</youtube></center> | ||
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==The Mix it Up AD== | ==The Mix it Up AD== | ||
A virgin who will [[fact|never get dick in his entire life]] | A virgin who will [[fact|never get dick in his entire life]] drew aa picture of a sexualized transsexual person that was placed on a wall as an advertisement in Cyberpunk 2077. A [[SJW]] on Twatter got [[offended]] over a [[get laid|sexualized transsexual on the wall]]. | ||
[[File:Mix it Up Snowflake.png|center]] | [[File:Mix it Up Snowflake.png|center]] | ||
Many | Many [[snowflake]]s saw the tweet and got so pissed over this that the [[wants to fuck|artist]] went on a woke rambling spree in an interview by [[Polygon]]. | ||
{{Quote|Why was a trans model used in this particular advertisement?|Polygun}} | {{Quote|Why was a trans model used in this particular advertisement?|Polygun}} | ||
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==WHEN WILL IT COME OUT?== | ==WHEN WILL IT COME OUT?== | ||
Up until | Up until its release Cyberpunk 2077 was delayed multiple times to troll people into thinking it's actually the cure to everything. CD Projekt Red stated this: | ||
{{quote|[[lie|We are currently at a state where the game is complete and playable, but there's still work to be done. Night City is massive--full of stories, content, and places to visit, but due to the sheer scale and complexity of it all, we need more time to finish playtesting, fixing, and polishing. We want Cyberpunk 2077 to be our crowning achievement for this generation and postponing launch will give the precious months we need to make the game perfect.]]| | {{quote|[[lie|We are currently at a state where the game is complete and playable, but there's still work to be done. Night City is massive--full of stories, content, and places to visit, but due to the sheer scale and complexity of it all, we need more time to finish playtesting, fixing, and polishing. We want Cyberpunk 2077 to be our crowning achievement for this generation and postponing launch will give the precious months we need to make the game perfect.]]|[[CP]] Projekt Red}} | ||
While the loyal followers were fine with these delays, this meant for all | While the loyal followers were fine with these delays, this meant for all developers actually working on the game that they would be starving to death at 3:00 AM at night eating their [[McDonalds]] with their filthy hands coding a bunch of shit into the game with no sleep or care by the boss, and that is if you can even get a McDonalds which isn't very likely as you will never be able to go outside. But who cares [[Bullshit|CD Projekt are gods and we must follow everything our savior does]]. | ||
==Release== | ==Release== | ||
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<center><youtube>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXLohSvTKpg</youtube></center> | <center><youtube>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXLohSvTKpg</youtube></center> | ||
One day | One day of [[Santa Claus|December]] 7th, [[2020]] people woke up ran downstairs forgetting about eating their breakfast because [[no one|who the fuck wants to do stuff that actually matters]] and found a [[worthless|copy of Cyberpunk 2077]] on the floor, then they put the disk in the tray (or it's already downloaded for you if [[waste|bought digitally]], you're a dumbass who forgot to [[too soon|preorder]] the game and bought it on [[Amazon]] now having to wait to play the [[Unrealistic expectations|master achievement of the human race]] or you are the [[You gonna be raped|biggest fucking dumbass]] in the world and [[Self-important|went outside to your local store to buy the game because fuck everyone else I don't give a fuck about social distancing]]) to realize [[truth|CD Projekt Red aren't god afterall]]. | ||
When the game came out it was playable on the [[Nobody got time for that|most expensive PC]] and [[sad|nothing else]]. They gave this computer to every [[video game journalism|reviewer]] so they can't see what it's like for [[shit|everyone else]]. | When the game came out it was playable on the [[Nobody got time for that|most expensive PC]] and [[sad|nothing else]]. They gave this computer to every [[video game journalism|reviewer]] so they can't see what it's like for [[shit|everyone else]]. | ||
No one else can fucking play this game, leading to outrage, war, terrorism and protests. People complained about the same shit as everyone else including | No one else can fucking play this game, leading to outrage, war, terrorism and protests. People complained about the same shit as everyone else including: | ||
* I can't fucking play it. | * I can't fucking play it. | ||
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* I must slaughter CD Project Red | * I must slaughter CD Project Red | ||
CD Projekt Red once thought to | CD Projekt Red once thought to be gods were now seen as traitors of the human race. Their company is now being burned into flames by their once [[Useless Human|followers]]. People went to peak apeshit over [[OH GOD HOW DID THIS GET HERE I AM NOT GOOD WITH COMPUTER|pre-ordering a game they would never be able to play]]. People started review bombing the game on Metacritic thinking that it would help CD Project realize that they're the evil masterminds that they are. | ||
People made millions of dogshit | People made millions of dogshit YouTube videos that are exactly the same. People had such unrealistic expectations that they had a fit over [[Your a fucking idiot|the base game not being the masterpiece it was supposed to be]]. | ||
{{videoframe|Dogshit Vids by Outraged gamers |background-color:white;|font-weight:bold; | {{videoframe|Dogshit Vids by Outraged gamers |background-color:white;|font-weight:bold; | ||
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}} | }} | ||
This led to [[Sony]] removing the game from the PlayStation Store, so CD Project Red | This led to [[Sony]] removing the game from the PlayStation Store, so CD Project Red wouldn't be making jew-gold off [[basement-dwellers|people]] [[get a life|bitching about the game online]] and so they can fall down to the bottom of the class list. | ||
{{quote|SIE strives to ensure a high level of customer satisfaction, therefore we will begin to offer a full refund for all gamers who have purchased Cyberpunk 2077 via PlayStation Store. SIE will also be removing Cyberpunk 2077 from PlayStation Store until further notice. | {{quote|SIE strives to ensure a high level of customer satisfaction, therefore we will begin to offer a full refund for all gamers who have purchased Cyberpunk 2077 via PlayStation Store. SIE will also be removing Cyberpunk 2077 from PlayStation Store until further notice. | ||
Once we have confirmed that you purchased Cyberpunk 2077 via PlayStation Store, we will begin processing your refund. Please note that completion of the refund may vary based on your payment method and financial institution.| | Once we have confirmed that you purchased Cyberpunk 2077 via PlayStation Store, we will begin processing your refund. Please note that completion of the refund may vary based on your payment method and financial institution.|Sony Interactive Entertainment}} | ||
Both Sony and Microsoft | Both Sony and Microsoft were offering refunds of the game for the losers that actually bought the game. This will further CD Projekt Red's fall into insanity. | ||
==Lawsuits== | ==Lawsuits== | ||
The FBI is suing CD Projekt Red for their crimes of pissing off outraged gamers | The FBI is suing CD Projekt Red for their crimes of pissing off outraged gamers due to their inability to tell people that you need a PC at highest price possible. Following Sony's removal of the game off the PlayStation Store Microsoft started to give refunds to anyone that bought the game as well. CD Projekt Red will loose their god status, therefore everything said was misleading. | ||
A second lawsuit by the [[US]] [[Government]] occurred for their crimes against their people. | A second lawsuit by the [[US]] [[Government]] occurred for their crimes against their people. | ||
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{{quote|The Management Board of CD PROJEKT S.A. with a registered office in Warsaw (hereinafter referred to as “the Company”) hereby announces that it received confirmation from a law firm cooperating with the Company that a second civil class action lawsuit had been filed in the United States District Court for the Central District of California by a law firm acting on behalf of a group of holders of securities traded in the USA under the ticker symbols “OTGLY” and “OTGLF” and based on Company shares. The content of the claim, including its subject and scope, is the same as the one disclosed by the Company in Current Report 68/2020 of 25 December 2020.|Americunt}} | {{quote|The Management Board of CD PROJEKT S.A. with a registered office in Warsaw (hereinafter referred to as “the Company”) hereby announces that it received confirmation from a law firm cooperating with the Company that a second civil class action lawsuit had been filed in the United States District Court for the Central District of California by a law firm acting on behalf of a group of holders of securities traded in the USA under the ticker symbols “OTGLY” and “OTGLF” and based on Company shares. The content of the claim, including its subject and scope, is the same as the one disclosed by the Company in Current Report 68/2020 of 25 December 2020.|Americunt}} | ||
The Government of [[Poland]] is also | The Government of [[Poland]] is also planning to sue CD Projekt Red to further kill thy CD Projekt Red as they keep losing jew-gold earned from once loyal followers. | ||
==Apology== | ==Apology== | ||
CD Projekt Red is falling down each day, as they | CD Projekt Red is falling down each day, as they lose more followers every second. For their last resort to save their dying company they made a shitty apology in which [[LOL WUT|they acted like god and they will never do wrong again]]. | ||
<center><youtube>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3V4UBZmC9o</youtube></center> | <center><youtube>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3V4UBZmC9o</youtube></center> | ||
Everyone saw through | Everyone saw through their plans which led to even more outcry and rage. They were mocked to death online for the fact not one person was smart enough to think they won't start a giant outcry of losers. | ||
==The Hack== | ==The Hack== | ||
While many people were butthurt over not being able to play Cyberpunk 2077 after paying $60 dollars for it, [[13 year old boy|one person]] was on a whole other level of butthartardation. This [[basement-dweller|person]] actually spent the time to hack CD Projekt Red and steal a bunch of [[worthless| | While many people were butthurt over not being able to play Cyberpunk 2077 after paying $60 dollars for it, [[13 year old boy|one person]] was on a whole other level of butthartardation. This [[basement-dweller|person]] actually spent the time to hack CD Projekt Red and steal a bunch of [[worthless|employee info]] and not just the entire game's fucking source code but all of the entire fucking engine to make their games. The data was sold for a starting price of 1 million dollars which ended up being 7 million dollars. | ||
You can see the [[none|IQ]] of the hacker in the message he sent to CD Projekt Red | You can see the [[none|IQ]] of the hacker in the message he sent to CD Projekt Red after he hacked the company: | ||
{{quote|@ | {{quote|@ | ||
| Line 130: | Line 130: | ||
You have 48 hours to contact us.| The most cancerous failure at life basement-dweller to ever exist}} | You have 48 hours to contact us.| The most cancerous failure at life basement-dweller to ever exist}} | ||
CD Projekt Red posted on Twatter how they got hacked by this dumbass | CD Projekt Red posted on Twatter how they got hacked by this dumbass: | ||
{{quote|Yesterday we discovered that we have become a victim of a targeted cyber attack, due to which some of our internal systems have been compromised. | {{quote|Yesterday we discovered that we have become a victim of a targeted cyber attack, due to which some of our internal systems have been compromised. | ||
| Line 138: | Line 138: | ||
We are still investigating the incident, however at this time we can confirm that —to our best knowledge — the compromised systems did not contain any personal data of our players or users of our services. | We are still investigating the incident, however at this time we can confirm that —to our best knowledge — the compromised systems did not contain any personal data of our players or users of our services. | ||
We have already approached the relevant authorities, including law enforcement and the President of the Personal Data Protection Office, as well as IT forensic specialists, and we will closely cooperate with them in order to fully investigate this incident.| CockDick Projekt Red}} | We have already approached the relevant authorities, including law enforcement and the President of the Personal Data Protection Office, as well as IT forensic specialists, and we will closely cooperate with them in order to fully investigate this incident.|[[Unfunny|CockDick]] Projekt Red}} | ||
Some people were actually retarded enough to praise the hacker for finding all of CD Projekt Red info. While the rest rightfully mocked this cancer to | Some people were actually retarded enough to praise the hacker for finding all of CD Projekt Red's info. While the rest rightfully mocked this cancer to our society. | ||
==Patches== | ==Patches== | ||
| Line 161: | Line 161: | ||
File: Cyberfuck.jpg | File: Cyberfuck.jpg | ||
File: RunningCyberpunk.jpg| Never going happen | File: RunningCyberpunk.jpg| Never going happen | ||
</gallery>}} | </gallery>}} | ||
==See Also== | ==See Also== | ||
*[[The Witcher]] | |||
*[[Fallout 76]] | *[[Fallout 76]] | ||
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{{gaming}} | {{gaming}} | ||
Revision as of 15:59, 8 August 2021

Cyberpunk 2077 was supposed the biggest game evar made by the once thought be god and savior CD Projekt Red. People were hyped over everything about this game. They would loose there shit from a glimpse of this game. People were breathtaken from Keanu Reeves.
When the game came out it turned out that no one could fucking play it, unless you are rich as fuck. Neckbeard gamers raged everywhere and burst into flames, having a meltdown and spamming everywhere online about how "CD PROJEKT RED ARE TRAITORS" and humanity is doomed. Sony took the game off the PlayStation Store and to stop more cancerous gamers from emerging all companies gave out refunds (not "good guy" Microsoft though, they're greedy). CD Projekt Red is now under investigation and class action lawsuits from the FBI for fraud. The world will be in rage for the rest of time as people will never forget about CD Projekt Red's forbidden crimes.
Reveal
Cyberpunk 2077 started development before the Xbox One and PlayStation 4 were out. It was first shown off to the public in 2013.
Keanu Reeves
| ALERT: THIS IS A FORCED MEME |
| Breathtaking Keanu Reeves will be posted by the same unfunny newfag until you like it. |
At E3 people saw a trailer that made their worship for CD Project Red skyrocket, but then Keanu Reeves got on stage and people lost their shit.
This lead to unfunny memes being spammed on Reddit.
The Mix it Up AD
A virgin who will never get dick in his entire life drew aa picture of a sexualized transsexual person that was placed on a wall as an advertisement in Cyberpunk 2077. A SJW on Twatter got offended over a sexualized transsexual on the wall.

Many snowflakes saw the tweet and got so pissed over this that the artist went on a woke rambling spree in an interview by Polygon.
—Polygun | ||
— Perma-Virgin | ||
WHEN WILL IT COME OUT?
Up until its release Cyberpunk 2077 was delayed multiple times to troll people into thinking it's actually the cure to everything. CD Projekt Red stated this:
—CP Projekt Red | ||
While the loyal followers were fine with these delays, this meant for all developers actually working on the game that they would be starving to death at 3:00 AM at night eating their McDonalds with their filthy hands coding a bunch of shit into the game with no sleep or care by the boss, and that is if you can even get a McDonalds which isn't very likely as you will never be able to go outside. But who cares CD Projekt are gods and we must follow everything our savior does.
Release
One day of December 7th, 2020 people woke up ran downstairs forgetting about eating their breakfast because who the fuck wants to do stuff that actually matters and found a copy of Cyberpunk 2077 on the floor, then they put the disk in the tray (or it's already downloaded for you if bought digitally, you're a dumbass who forgot to preorder the game and bought it on Amazon now having to wait to play the master achievement of the human race or you are the biggest fucking dumbass in the world and went outside to your local store to buy the game because fuck everyone else I don't give a fuck about social distancing) to realize CD Projekt Red aren't god afterall.
When the game came out it was playable on the most expensive PC and nothing else. They gave this computer to every reviewer so they can't see what it's like for everyone else.
No one else can fucking play this game, leading to outrage, war, terrorism and protests. People complained about the same shit as everyone else including:
- I can't fucking play it.
- I wasted $60 dollars
- I must slaughter CD Project Red
CD Projekt Red once thought to be gods were now seen as traitors of the human race. Their company is now being burned into flames by their once followers. People went to peak apeshit over pre-ordering a game they would never be able to play. People started review bombing the game on Metacritic thinking that it would help CD Project realize that they're the evil masterminds that they are.
People made millions of dogshit YouTube videos that are exactly the same. People had such unrealistic expectations that they had a fit over the base game not being the masterpiece it was supposed to be.
Previous Video | Next Video
This led to Sony removing the game from the PlayStation Store, so CD Project Red wouldn't be making jew-gold off people bitching about the game online and so they can fall down to the bottom of the class list.
—Sony Interactive Entertainment | ||
Both Sony and Microsoft were offering refunds of the game for the losers that actually bought the game. This will further CD Projekt Red's fall into insanity.
Lawsuits
The FBI is suing CD Projekt Red for their crimes of pissing off outraged gamers due to their inability to tell people that you need a PC at highest price possible. Following Sony's removal of the game off the PlayStation Store Microsoft started to give refunds to anyone that bought the game as well. CD Projekt Red will loose their god status, therefore everything said was misleading.
A second lawsuit by the US Government occurred for their crimes against their people.
—Americunt | ||
The Government of Poland is also planning to sue CD Projekt Red to further kill thy CD Projekt Red as they keep losing jew-gold earned from once loyal followers.
Apology
CD Projekt Red is falling down each day, as they lose more followers every second. For their last resort to save their dying company they made a shitty apology in which they acted like god and they will never do wrong again.
Everyone saw through their plans which led to even more outcry and rage. They were mocked to death online for the fact not one person was smart enough to think they won't start a giant outcry of losers.
The Hack
While many people were butthurt over not being able to play Cyberpunk 2077 after paying $60 dollars for it, one person was on a whole other level of butthartardation. This person actually spent the time to hack CD Projekt Red and steal a bunch of employee info and not just the entire game's fucking source code but all of the entire fucking engine to make their games. The data was sold for a starting price of 1 million dollars which ended up being 7 million dollars.
You can see the IQ of the hacker in the message he sent to CD Projekt Red after he hacked the company:
| Hello CD PROJEKT | !
Your have been EPICALLY pwned!! We have dumped FULL copies of your source code from your Perforce server for Cyberpunk 2077, Witcher 3, Gwent and the unreleased version of Witcher 3!!! We have also dumped all your documents relating to accounting, administation, legal, HR, investor relations and more! Also, we have encrypted all of your servers, but we understand that you can most likely recover from backups. If we will not come to an agreement, then your source codes will be sold or leaked online and your documents will be sent to our contacts in gaming journalism. Your public image will go doen the shitter even more and people will see how you shitty your company functions. Investors will lose trust in your company and the stovk will dive down even lower! You have 48 hours to contact us. |
|||||||||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
— The most cancerous failure at life basement-dweller to ever exist | ||||||||||||||||||
CD Projekt Red posted on Twatter how they got hacked by this dumbass:
—CockDick Projekt Red | ||
Some people were actually retarded enough to praise the hacker for finding all of CD Projekt Red's info. While the rest rightfully mocked this cancer to our society.
Patches
What did they fix?
...
...
...
Nothing!
Gallery
See Also
|
Cyberpunk 2077 is part of a series on Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage. |