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EHarmony: Difference between revisions

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[[Image:Rejected by eHarmony.jpg|center]]<br/>
[[Image:Rejected by eHarmony.jpg|center]]<br/>
'''eHarmony''' is a match-making site that's meant for 40 year old [[virgin]]s who can't get laid. If you go to eHarmony, there's a 99% chance you'll get rejected for not being a [[christian]] or for being a Jew. Most people who go to eHarmony will be rejected purely for the reasons below:
'''eHarmony''' is a match-making site that's meant for 40 year old [[virgin]]s who can't get laid. If you go to eHarmony, there's a 99% chance you'll get rejected for not being a [[christian]] or for being a Jew. Most people who go to eHarmony will be rejected purely for the reasons below:
[[Image:Eharmmmmu.jpg|thumb|right]]
<!--[[Image:Eharmmmmu.jpg|thumb|right]]-->
[[File:Eharmony rejection.jpg|thumb|200px|right|The [[lie|20%]] rejected includes [[you]] and every other social undesirable not a part of Neil's master race.]]
*Being an [[Atheist]]
*Being an [[Atheist]]
*Being a [[fag]]
*Being a [[fag]]
Line 10: Line 10:
*Being a [[Satanist]]
*Being a [[Satanist]]
*Being a [[Star Trek]] fan
*Being a [[Star Trek]] fan
*Being a Jew
*Being a [[Jew]]
*Being [[agnostic]]
*Being [[agnostic]]
*Being [[Chris-chan|mentally unstable]]
*Being [[Chris-chan|mentally unstable]]
*Being [[black]]
*Being [[black]]
*Being Mexican
*Being [[Mexican]]
*And of course, being [[you]]


Although, if you were a guy trapped in another guy's body, (see [[snapesnogger]]), you'll probably be accepted anyway because you can get [[married]].
Although, if you were a guy trapped in another guy's body, (see [[snapesnogger]]), you'll probably be accepted anyway because you can get [[married]].


==The [[Truth]]==
==The [[Truth]]==
The man in charge of this site, is international christian [republican] and sodomite Neil [[Cock|Clark]] Warren. When he isn't engaging in hard-core sex orgies with his fellow CEOs like Rupert Murdock or Bill Gates, he enjoys fucking with people and making them lose their time and money on eHarmony. If you were someone who was able to get accepted to eHarmony, odds are you're probably [[christian]] (unless you're [[catholic]], because we all know how much [[LOL|evangelists and bapists hate catholics]]).
The man in charge of this site is international, Christian, [[republican]] and sodomite Neil [[Cock|Clark]] Warren. When he isn't engaging in [[lemonparty|hard-core sex orgies]] with his fellow CEOs like Rupert Murdock or Bill Gates, he enjoys fucking with people and making them lose their time and money on eHarmony. If you were someone who was able to get accepted to eHarmony, odds are you're probably [[christian]] (unless you're [[catholic]], because we all know how much [[LOL|evangelists and bapists hate catholics]]).


But don't just take our word for it, check it out for yourself:
But don't just take our word for it, check it out for yourself:


{{quote|He (Neil Clark Warren) adds that same-sex marriage is illegal in most states. 'We don't really want to participate in something that's illegal.'|Neil on being a queer chaser and fag beater.}}
{{quote|He (Neil Clark Warren) adds that same-sex marriage is illegal in most states. 'We don't really want to participate in something that's illegal.'|Neil on being a queer chaser and fag beater.}}


This proves that eHarmony hates fags and are ideological [[christian]]s who enjoy fapping off each other. eHarmony is only interested in helping people who can get married.
This proves that eHarmony hates fags and are ideological [[christian]]s who enjoy fapping off each other. eHarmony is only interested in helping people who can get married.
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{{quote|You can say that that is just a good business idea, because it increases the size of your market. But it's also for me a philosophical point: I think our world will be a lot better world if we can help people of all types get married well|Neil [http://www.usatoday.com/life/people/2005-05-18-eharmony_x.htm justifying the shitty service he provides to all].}}
{{quote|You can say that that is just a good business idea, because it increases the size of your market. But it's also for me a philosophical point: I think our world will be a lot better world if we can help people of all types get married well|Neil [http://www.usatoday.com/life/people/2005-05-18-eharmony_x.htm justifying the shitty service he provides to all].}}


<center>
 
{{fv|eharmonyvids|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;
{{fv|eharmonyvids|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>mcr6ZwknUP0</youtube><br/><center>Not even Jason can get lucky</center>
|<youtube>mcr6ZwknUP0</youtube><br/><center>Not even Jason can get lucky</center>
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|<youtube>4P2fyYf6VWQ</youtube>
|<youtube>4P2fyYf6VWQ</youtube>
}}
}}
</center>


==New eHarmony Campaign==
==New eHarmony Campaign==


eHarmony reaching out the the ordinary public. Proof that Neil is a [[pedophile]] and creates underage girl profiles for himself.<center>
eHarmony reaching out the ordinary public. Proof that Neil is a [[pedophile]] and creates underage girl profiles for himself.<center>
<youtube>LsDHzwHDfNM</youtube>
<youtube>LsDHzwHDfNM</youtube>
</center>
</center>
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* [[Plenty of Fish]]
* [[Plenty of Fish]]
* [[Dying Alone]]
* [[Dying Alone]]
* [[Muslim Dating Sites]]


==External Links==
== External Links ==
*[http://www.eharmony.com The Website]
*[http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/06/01/BAGNSQ63EQ6.DTL NO FAGS ALLOWED]


{{dyingalone}}
* [http://www.eharmony.com The Website]
* [http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/06/01/BAGNSQ63EQ6.DTL NO FAGS ALLOWED]


{{sex}}


[[Category:Sites]]
{{Dying Alone|title=eHarmony}}
{{sex|title=eHarmony}}
{{Sites|title=eHarmony}}

Latest revision as of 18:18, 13 January 2019


eHarmony is a match-making site that's meant for 40 year old virgins who can't get laid. If you go to eHarmony, there's a 99% chance you'll get rejected for not being a christian or for being a Jew. Most people who go to eHarmony will be rejected purely for the reasons below:

The 20% rejected includes you and every other social undesirable not a part of Neil's master race.

Although, if you were a guy trapped in another guy's body, (see snapesnogger), you'll probably be accepted anyway because you can get married.

The Truth

The man in charge of this site is international, Christian, republican and sodomite Neil Clark Warren. When he isn't engaging in hard-core sex orgies with his fellow CEOs like Rupert Murdock or Bill Gates, he enjoys fucking with people and making them lose their time and money on eHarmony. If you were someone who was able to get accepted to eHarmony, odds are you're probably christian (unless you're catholic, because we all know how much evangelists and bapists hate catholics).

But don't just take our word for it, check it out for yourself:

   
 
He (Neil Clark Warren) adds that same-sex marriage is illegal in most states. 'We don't really want to participate in something that's illegal.'
 

 
 

—Neil on being a queer chaser and fag beater.

This proves that eHarmony hates fags and are ideological christians who enjoy fapping off each other. eHarmony is only interested in helping people who can get married.

   
 
You can say that that is just a good business idea, because it increases the size of your market. But it's also for me a philosophical point: I think our world will be a lot better world if we can help people of all types get married well
 

 
 

—Neil justifying the shitty service he provides to all.



Not even Jason can get lucky


What happens when you DO get accepted to eHarmony

New eHarmony Campaign

eHarmony reaching out the ordinary public. Proof that Neil is a pedophile and creates underage girl profiles for himself.

See Also

External Links


eHarmony is part of a series on Dying Alone

[DeadCry yourself to sleep]

Those Who Have Died Alone

Aaron AlexisAaron BushnellAaron SwartzAdam LanzaAlexis ArquetteAmanda ToddAmy WinehouseAnal CuntAndy KaufmanAngry GrandpaAnna Nicole SmithAnthony WarnerAsa CoonBrian AdamsBrandon CrispByuuCharmaine DragunCho Seung-HuiChris BenoitChris Harper-MercerChynaCodey PorterDavid BowieDavid CarradineDragoneerEazy-EEdaremElliot RodgerElvis PresleyGeorge SodiniGizgizGleb KorablevHappyCabbieHarambeH.P. LovecraftHeath LedgerJake DavisonJeff WeiseJewWarioJim MorrisonKate SpadeKitty0706Kurt CobainLemonade CoyoteLeelah AlcornLil PeepLiloLoki BlackfangLowtaxMia JaninMegan MeierMichael JacksonMitchell HendersonMySpaceNathan GaleNikita LytkinOtoya YamaguchiPekka-Eric AuvinenPrinceRandy StairRehtaeh ParsonsRicardo LopezRina PalenkovaRipperRobin WilliamsRonnie McNuttRudolph ZurickRyan PalmeterShawn WoolleyShayShuaibySol PaisStephen PaddockSteve StephensThomas Matthew CrooksTony48219TooDamnFilthyTyler DumstorfVester FlanaganWilliam AtchisonXXXTentacionZhao Zewei

Those Dying Alone

03bgood2cash2 gryphon7jackass77Adam SandlerAhuviya HarelAIDS SkrillexAkewsticRockRAlex FordAlison RappAmerica's Third PartyAmy SchumerAndrew AllansonAngry JoeAnimatedJamesAnita SarkeesianAnonymous BorgAnthony 'A-Log' LoGattoAntony AguilarApril DavisAquagirlwhitefoxArgent009Arguecat3Arin HansonArmake21AsalieriAsher2500Austin AlexanderAvantGardePonyBambifan101BarneyfagBasement DwellersBen FordBen MoynihanBenny_the_SnakeBenthelooneyBig RedBikerfoxBill9929Bill GaedeBill GatesBLACKbusterCriticBob RehahnBrandontheMovieGuyBrandon SmithBrian MuellerBrian Richard ZaigerBrianna WuBroniesButLovaByAppointmentToCarl the CuckCartoonjunkieCaseydeckerCatboyKamiCheeyevChloe SagalChris-chanChris CrockerChuck M.Clint of Rise and FallCopperCabCorey MargeraCoughlan666CrazyvideosandrantsCrinklemonCyraxxDaniel BrandtDan CilleyDane CookDani FilthDarius McCollumDarknessthecurseDarksydePhilDave ChapelleDave MustaineDavid HockeyDaxflameDBoyWheelerDeekerDeterminedToDrawUTDev-catscratchDGTrixieDiaper BoyDillon CosseyDiogo MendesDisneyFan01DisneyMasterDJ KEEMSTARDnepropetrovsk maniacsDodgerofZionDogpatch PressDon RobertsDoodletonesDoomer3868Dorian_GayDoug WalkerDrakonDrossRotzankDoomentioDustinEDP445Emer PrevostEmosEpic Fat GuyEpicKitty54Eric AbramovEric RidenourErik RibsskogErtasVideosFilthy FrankFagolescentsFanFic CriticFast EddieFat ManFaust & Pory Five Nights at Freddy's fansFlardoxFluffy teh wolfForeverKailynFriends of A-LogFurriesG-ZayGather Against FateGeorge LopezGeosheaGhostGirlvinylGlobelampGoddessMilleniaGraykatGreg MazujianGwen GaleGwen StefaniHarmful OpinionsHellkiller777I Dislike Cis PeopleI Hate EverythingIan Miles CheongIchverboticze⁴rImma-The-DeerInkBunnyIsabella Loretta JankeJamil The KingJessi SlaughterJessica LeedsJim ProfitJINXDROWNEDJoe Crusher PicklesJoekerJohn BullaJohn FieldJohn KricfalusiJohn Patrick RogersJonathan McIntoshJonmonJonTronJoseph CampJoseph8276Joshua "Null" MoonJuggalosJustinRPGKat DenningsKendall JennerKeegan SalisburyKathleen ToddKenny GlennKevin HavensKeffalsKimmo Johan AlmKingEmpoleonKingMasterReviewKrashedLaci GreenLarry the Cable GuyLauren FaustLeafyIsHereLecarickLeigh AlexanderLeisureSuitGamingLena DunhamLeonard F. Shaner Jr.Leslie JonesLifeInATentLikeicareLinkaraLittleCloudLittleKuribohLogo KidsLordelthibarLow Tier GodLucian HodobocM. ChaosA Man in BlackManchildrenMar9122MarblesMarioMario456MariotehplumberMarjan SiklicmasteroogwgayMatthew DavisMatthew NicholsonMcJuggerNuggetsMDetector5‎MeowbarkMeganSpeaksMichael BattonMichael FitzhywelMichael GimsonMike SandyMoleman9000Monica PunkMonkeyGameGuidesMoviebobMumkey JonesMuZemikeMylarBalloonFanMysteriousMrEnterMysticArkNaokoElric2250NawlinWikiNeckbeardsNeoGAFNick BateNick BravoNikkineko333Noah AntwilerNostalgia ChickNotchNullcherriObjectfagsOFWGKTAOnideus Mad HatterOnyx ForepawPacificoceanasiaPaigeGirlPaul FeigPaulie CalafioreParkourdude91Peter BrightPeter CoffinPhantomStrider8Phil FishPhunWithLogicPinkieponyPit ViperPixyteriPeluchin EntertainmentPMRantsPreachingthegospelQuentin TarantinoRachael MacFarlaneRandi HarperRichard ReidRicki RavenRMG ProductionsRobert StaintonRobert Wayne StilesRockosockoRomeo RoseRootbrianRose3212Ryan RouthSad FrogSammyClassicSonicFanSam PepperSarah ButtsSarahisniftySaturnDOSSceptreSchnookumsSegacampSega KidSeth MacFarlaneSethistoShadmanSimply OkamiSlowbeef & DiabetusSnapesnoggerSonic SaviorSonmanicSony-MaeSophie LabelleSpax3StormySuperlisamcbSusan BoyleTara StrongTheAmazingAtheistTheDOSFagTheSockDetectiveTim BuckleyTJ LaneTodd in the ShadowsTom PrestonToonEGuyTourneyfagsTrey Eric SeslerTrigglypuffTyciolTyler GarmanyUlillilliaThe Unknown AutobotVadeVinceintheBayWade FulpWeatherManKevinWesley!!!WoWfan4lifeWwwareaWeegeeisgoingtokillmXenuriaYandereDevYoshiwii1Youyoungbloodfantasy91Zoe QuinnZone

Their Methods

9gagAdventure TimeAn HeroAIDSAnimuAlt-rightArt SchoolA-Log's Fanfictionask.fmAsperger's SyndromeAssigned MaleBath SaltsThe Big Bang TheoryBattle For Dream IslandBlackLivesMatterBlack metalBody PillowsBonziWORLDBitViewBoozeBullyingBuzzFeedChildren's CartoonsClown WorldComputer Science IIICosplayCumOnPrintedPics.ComCupheadDead FriendDeath metalDeath penaltyDating SimsDeviantARTDiscordDrugsEdginessFamily GuyFanFictionFeminismFedoraFidget spinnerThe Filthy Frank ShowFive Nights at Freddy'sFleshlightFriend ZoneFurAffinityFurry ArtFun Shitposting WikiGarry's ModGenshin ImpactGoAnimate!GooglewhackingGorillazGothsGravity FallsGreen DayGreeny PhatomGrindcoreHackingHappy Madison ProductionsHomestuck‎Hover hand‎HufflepuffHigh ScoreIncelcoreIndie musicInfantilismInsane Clown PosseIntrovertInvisible GirlfriendIRCJenkemKiwi FarmsKotakuLeague of LegendsLegoLibertarianismLiveJournalLonelyLoveShyMai WaifuMass ShootingsMen's rights activismMinecraftMLP ForumsMMORPGsMGTOWMUDsMy Little PonyMy Tiny DickNice GuyismNu metalOculus RiftOh ShiternetOnline datingOnline sex gamesOverwatchPlastic CrapPlenty of Fish/r9k/Rick and MortyRobloxRule 34RuneScapeSchool ShootingsSecond LifeSelf-VictimizationShy Boys IRLSilk Screen Goku ShirtSlayerSlipknotSluthateSmogon UniversitySocial JusticeSource FilmmakerSouth ParkSparkalloonSpeakoniaStar vs. the Forces of EvilSteven UniverseTaking the Internet Too SeriouslyTeam Fortress 2That Guy With The GlassesThe Anytown ShowThe EntersphereThe SimsThey Might Be GiantsTomb RaiderToolTransformersTulpasTumblrTV Tropestwenty one pilotsUnchartedUncle GrandpaUncyclopediaUndertaleUnikittyUTTPVidLiiVirginityVirtual YouTubersVloggerheadsWatchMojo.comWeezerWikimaniaWizardchanWorld of WarcraftYIIK: A Post-Modern RPGYouTube

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