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Ohio State University
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BREAKING NEWS!! Attacker confirmed to be Muslim. MSM will now stop reporting on the story entirely. |
One day you're a Somali refugee being profiled by the campus newspaper on your first day at Ohio State University. Since you missed orientation and don't know about the student union building, you tell the reporter you're scared to pray in public the required fives times a day because of the way the media portrays Muslims. The next day you're ramming your Honda Civic into people and demonstrating your butcher knife skills to coeds, and ISIS takes all the credit. It seems the European Rapefugee Crisis has started to seep into the fabric of America. Dumb, traitorous leftist faggots squealed three times harder than Trigglypuff at Uncle Sam to allow in "refugees" from the third world. With a massively growing headache, the government gave in to the Marxists demands and allowed for mass immigration to begin and soon, many innocent little refugees were inhabiting our evil bigoted nation. One of them was a Somalian mudslime who's life ended the same way most immigrant mudslimes lives end - pulling a murder-suicide attack on society. Enter Abdul Razak Ali Artan☪, an 18-year-old who decided to repay the kindness of the American people by garnering an 8-inch-long kitchen knife and greeting guests around his campus to diversify them. The innocent victim managed to injure like 10 people (hasn't even managed to kill someone) before the cops shot him to death - another act of brutal, horrific police brutality committed against entirely innocent peoples of color.
Upon learning that the perpetrator wasn't a white autistic kid with a bowl haircut, the media immediately silenced their coverage of the story. After all, only white people are capable of acts of mass violence.
Interview
The mudslime was interviewed in his college's student journal:
Yeah. We're SURE it's JUST the media.
—The mudslimes final Facebook post prior to chimping out | ||
Liberal Reaction
The media, by which we mean "the escaped liberal inmates running the axiom asylum" split between two major reactionary stances. The first being, oddly enough, prayer! Silently chanting, "Please don't be a Muslim. Please be a white man. Please don't be a Muslim. Please be a white man." Ad nauseum. The secondary reaction consisted largely of automatically assuming that a big scary GUN was somehow involved. Spoilers: There was no gun, except for the one that shot the white Muslim terrorist.
This of course led to many a lulzy liberal tweeting by elected officials people you've probably never even heard of (because you don't even bother to vote)...
Even after reality had raped their retard rectums in every other direction many of them chose to double down in their idiocy by continuing to decry gun ownership despite the fact that the attacker didn't even own a gun, let alone many guns, which would be needed to necessitate any sort of "high score". Liberals aren't well equipped to deal with reality, so every day is basically "Make Shit Up Day" when you're tilting on over the port side of the batshit insane boat.
After furiously backpedaling the majority of the self-hating myopic misanthropes were quick to scurry on back to their safe-spaces where they could stuff their fat heads on into the ground to avoid accepting any semblance of ass blistering reality... like the FACT that while Muslims only make up less than 1% of the US population, they are responsible for upwards of 10% of all terrorist attacks on US soil in recent decades.
Gallery
Graded Score
| Kill count: | 0/20 (11 injured) Did worse than Alex Hribal |
|---|---|
| Accuracy: | 6/20 |
| Style: | 9/20 Knife-wielding Mudslime |
| Butthurt: | 4/20 No guns were used so nobody gave a fuck |
| Bonus: | 2/20 A fucking 16-year-old got more injuries than you |
Wanted Level:
Mall Cop
See Also
- Ali David Sonboly
- Dan's Neighborhood
- Kimveer Gill
- Nice Truck Attack 2016
- Dallas Sniper Attacks
- Muslims
- Alex Hribal
- Rapefugee
- European Rapefugee Crisis
- American rapefugee crisis
- Ohio - where such acts of horrific violence are as american as apple pie!
| Featured article December 6 & December 7, 2016 | ||
| Preceded by PizzaGate |
Ohio State University | Succeeded by World War II |