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Matthew de Grood: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 21:25, 4 December 2022
Born | c. 1992 (22 years old) |
Nationality | Soviet Canuckistan |
Score | Killed 5, wounded 1 |
Style | FPS, Single Player (knives only) |
An Hero | No (caught by dogs) |
Matthew de Grood is a psychology student who was attending an all-day party that proved to be boring, even by his standards. Having nothing better to do, the 22-year-old went to the kitchen and grabbed a non-threatening kitchen knife, having decided to switch from produce to meats would be a good idea while allowing him to explore his new found love of butchery. That early April morning, Matthew killed 4 men and a woman, resulting in an unimpressive high score of 5 points. Bonus points were awarded since two of the guys were members of Zachariah & The Prophets, ending the fledgling band's hopes and doing the world a favor. Matthew was caught 40 minutes later by a K9 unit, his father who is an Inspector of the Calgary police was embarrassed because his son was too much of a wimp to kill himself with a kitchen knife.
Graded Score
Graded score | |
---|---|
Kill count: | 5/20 |
Accuracy: | 15/20 5/6 Stabbed died. It's a knife, it's not hard. |
Style: | 18/20 Hitman: Silent Assassin. |
Butthurt: | 11/20 |
Bonus: | 20/20 Hard Mode: Melee Only! |
Total score: 69/100 (D) |
Quotes
YouTube
- We struggle to understand what happened
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Gallery
See Also
- Marc Lepine - Canadian Rambo against Feminazis
- Kimveer Gill - Armed to the teeth and yet did 4x worse than Matthew
- Elliot Rodger - another early-90s birth who went on a stabbing rampage
- Alex Hribal - another idiot who tried to go for the high score using knives; failed horribly.
- Anton Lundin Pettersson - armed with a sword and pwnd a few mudslimes.
External links