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White Devils

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Not To be confused with: White trash, Rednecks, and Crackers, since they are all the same shit.
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Your typical white bastard coveting the source of all honkey life.

White People also known as Honkeys, Crackers and Snow Niggers are descendants of the Neanderthals. It is widely known that White "People" are a genetically inferior race. It is well-documented that white people are the genetic version of trickle-down economics.

Collective

Those that are white are often both fake and gay.
White people are widely revered for their intelligence and sexual prowess.

Notoriously loathed by other races for their lack of culture and horrible smell, it's a well-known fact that White people are the most pathetic group of individuals of all time.

The majority of "White History" is widely studied and universally accepted as shameful, barbaric and disgraceful. Because of this, many of their historical "achievements" are often embellished bullshit achieved by pillaging other countries, raping everything in sight, and stealing anything shiny. Nearly all white culture is stolen from other cultures, and amalgamated into the doughy substance of whitey.

Starting out as robust black hominids and rapidly devolving to albinised maggots, the weaker tribes were driven north out of Africa into cold Europe where they further devolved into a white haze of dimwitted neanderthals such as Americunts, Britfags, Canucks, and Aussie fags. White skin is in actual fact a result of inbreeding on an exponential scale and an evolutionary lapse.

A white person's diet generally consists of jars of Hellman's Mayo, loaves of Wonderbread, gallons of Jack Daniel's whiskey, cottage cheese, shitty beer, Kraft's cheese, Hamburger Helper, dill pickles and cans of pork and beans...

General hobbies and interests of Caucasian folks include dealing meth-amphetamines, fucking their relatives, drinking alcohol until passing out, shooting up school and college campuses, watching NASCAR and shopping at Save-A-Lot, K-Mart and Family Dollar.

White women, when fat (and too shit-poor to afford implants), will often think that the drooping glutton hanging from their rears resembles thick booties and will shop for those undersized, low cut panties and thongs at Wal-Mart to lift up their asses to make them look appealing, even though this practice makes no fucking difference at all.

Notice how whitey has a disproportionately large percentage of serial killers and pedophiles in comparison to non-whitey nations, proving that over 98.9% of white men are Sick fucks.

Whiteys are, in fact, poorly disguised pigs, you can tell by their blotchy pigskin and spider-veins, they apply fake tan and other cosmetics to hide their bacon like complexion.

Cave beasts are under the delusion that they are superior. As they have been educated stupid since their first forays into civilization, this is not surprising. One good thing about the peckerwoods is their ability to blindly follow their jew leaders in perfect lockstep, however fake and gay the instructions might sound.

With their mouths pouted like a fish they will scream "THAT'S SEXIST!" while at the same time believing themselves to be entitled to a hot partner. Beauty comes from the inside – what counts is having a nice ass. But have you ever seen a white person on a training bicycle with the intention of becoming eye candy? NO! This gives irrefutable evidence that all white people must be put in gas chambers. When someone mentions the slightest stereotype of non-whites whiteys say "THAT'S RACIST!" They claim things like "OMG A tribe whose greatest achievement is that they make 13 year old boys destroy their own penis is the GREATEST THING EVAR!" On the other hand, they believe that their own hate-filled, yet unoutspoken, yet self-agrandizing, individualistic, decadent excuse of a society is the epitome of civilizations...


History

Throughout history, the white man has consistently rewritten history to hide their colossal, everyday fuck-ups. Enslaved by Moors, conquered by Egyptians, sold as sex-slaves by sheiks - had these facts not been expunged from their history books, their children might have escaped the current yoke of white guilt. Some argue that white people aren't quite as evolved as the more intelligent races of earth, and should be enslaved. However, enslavement would be impossible, as most white people are too fragile for any real manual labor, and they have no work ethic if the task doesn't involve killing babies for profit in Iraq.

The purest Caucasian, Mikhail Saakashvili.

The first known white people to populate Europe were the primitive Neanderthals, named after the Neander valley in Germany, from where their descendants can still be observed today. The mesolithic age came along, everyone was using stone tools, the dog was domesticated, and no one was naked anymore. Someone invented a stick. A few thousand years down the track, not much had changed. Europe was covered in forest and populated by semi nomadic semi naked tribes with no recorded literature. Additional sticks were invented. Meanwhile, in Africa; trade routes had been linked into asia, domestic farming was put into practice, iron tools were brought into use, and neighbouring Arabs were hard at work building the first cities. A number of this more progressed civilisaions sent letters of advice to the northern neighbours about civilisation for beginers. However, no one could read at the time, given the fact they were running half naken through the forest throwing sticks at each other. Things were looking bad for whitey, but these folks may have been uneducated, they were not retarded (yet) and decided to hold a meeting about how to get thier sloppy act into shape. No sooner than had everyone begin to arrive, the suggestion went out that they just copy what all the other races were already doing, and whith a bit of practice, maybe do a better job someday. Thus it all began: other peoples achievemnts were cut copied and pasted by white people into their own territory and plagarised as thier own work without due credit. A proud tradition that still prevails today.

A new stick was invented with a pointy piece of metal on one end, thus enabling the Roman empire to kick everyones ass to the curb in record time, setting the par for awesome and epic trolling. In fact, after completing all tutorial missions, they became so addicted to playing civilisation, they were able to show most of the oldfag players how it was meant to be done. The joy was not to last, due to the fact that the Aryan race along with a series of white barbaric tribes trashed everything.

As of 410AD white nationalism was in the dark ages. The name "dark ages" implies a very bleak outlook of war, pestilence, and famine, but the real reason for the term was the apparent lack of historical records to "illuminate" the missing pages. But what is an established fact is that there were comparatively little was achieved in literature nor architeture, just like you.

After a while of migrating through Europe raping and pillaging thier own kind, someone declared a renaissance, meaning "rebirth". Someone invented yet another stick, although this time it was upgraded with chinese gun powder and was capable of firing bullets. The whites then formed an audacious plan to take over the world one rape at a time. But before the plan was put into action, the whites decided to have a few practice rapes first in scaled down controlled circumstances. A few more hundred years saw them running around all over Europe as usual, raping and pillages each others women, children, animals, and even the disabled to show they had a caring side. Then one day, enough was enough. Time for a field test on some niggers.

After revising what they had learned about their recent rapes attacks in England Ireland Scotland and Wales one last time, everyone bought a gun and set sail to wherever the wind blows. And since that day onwards, whenever land is sighted by a white person, they race to plant a flag on it, and rape the nearest thing that looks human.

Inventions

Every invention purported to be created by maggots was actually stolen from one of the more evolutionarily fit, dark-skinned races with real melanin and all that good shit, but any threat to maggot civilization is squashed by their totally unbiased media.

However, the great white sharks have invented some unfortunate items of note:

Caucasian Behaviour

Just shave its fur.

The male specimen tends to be a redneck, a Tool fan, a frat boy or emo h0m0. By day they travel in packs seeking new land and/or oil and by night, the emofag cuts himself, the redneck posts on YouTube or MySpace, the Tool fan listens to terrible music and the frat boy goes on a rape spree and/or has gay sex with his roommates. The rest can be found fucking hot black chicks in motels. On the internets they usually write fully punctuated essays in the comments on rap videos because it makes them feel intelligent.

The female specimen begins the adult life-cycle as a 16 year old girl, though can more often be found in their final form, hovering near a beer tap. During the day they flock together to look for clothes or fattening food, then get on Facebook or MySpace, to bask in the glow of unwarranted self-importance. At night they busy themselves being almost raped and working on their careers.

Also note that whiteys enjoy tanning, despite claiming to love the whiteness of their skin. Said tanning will inevitably lead to skin cancer, proving Darwin's theory of natural selection to be true time and again. Really, it's just a slower way of becoming an hero, while at the same time resembling burnt toast. BUT IT'S A STATUS SYMBOL, GAIZ.

Sex

Average suburban Whitey teenage male doing average Whitey teenage things, like raping your neighbor's dog

Whiteys are world-renowned rapists and dabblers in all sorts of sexual lulz. White men rape children in Asia, and take sex slaves from Africa and South America. The white man is not above having sex with dogs or taking it in the ass from horses. Not surprisingly, white women are known for preferring black 12-inch cock over tiny 2-inch white cocks, and sometimes for having extreme fetishes and dying from bizarre sexual acts.

White Women and Black Men: Interspecies Breeding

It is widely known that the common white female will fuck anything that has a stick. In the same way, it is also widely known that the common black male will fuck anything that is even remotely sexy. As you can see, white women are prone to think about dick every 00.01 seconds while black men are prone to think about pussy every 30 seconds. Both are desperate, although the snowflake is promiscuous enough to go far as bestiality( fucking other crackers). Hence, there are much more interracial breeding between the two racial genders.

Food

Amongst honkeys, greasy, nutritionally-barren bland food is the norm. Hamburgers, Americanized "Mexican Food", and the ubiquitous all-you-can-eat buffet are essential to the white American diet. Picture if you will a 500-pound fat fuck who is actually malnourished, living amongst a pile of McDonald's wrappers and shitty discarded underwear while drinking a Diet Coke. Nothing beats good-old white ingenuity! With the help of American race-mixing that is — before that it was English food: kidney pie, spotted dick, and faggots!

Shelter

Typical level of cleanliness.

White people tend to congregate outside of cities in large developments of houses that look completely bland and alike. Their brains lack the ability to grasp new concepts, so they are frightened and disturbed by anything unusual or requiring complex thought to understand. It is because of this that whites create large housing developments with strict rules - the stricter the rules, the less thought required. Whitey is also known to chill under specially designated white trees.

Religion

1/2 of the white population is Judeo-Christian of one stripe or another, which makes perfect sense, which came from Judaism. The other half fall into the category Atheism, Paganism, Homosexuality yes it might as well be a religion among many whites, or White Supremacist Norse Mythology which often means you are dealing with a liberal. Tread carefully.

Clothing

In the summertime, white people, especially the middle-aged ones, will inevitably wear inappropriately short shorts to show off their marmalade-like, shapeless legs. They seem to think other people enjoy seeing these varicose vein-riddled blobs of uncooked dough, but they are badly mistaken.

Lice

Pediculosis capitis

White people often have head lice; they are parasitic disgusting fucking bugs that live and breed on the scalp of Caucaziods. This will generally be seen on the heads of crackkaz that are ugly white trash.

White Culture

As white people have no native culture, they are forced to co-opt bits and pieces from every other society in the world, simultaneously combining them into a horrible mishmash of 'diversity' while ruining the original. White culture consists mainly of shopping, eating, listening to their cultural music, and getting abortions.

White IQ

Unbiased intelligence measurements show that different races do have different IQs. These tests have shown Asians, Arabs,Blacks and Indians to in fact have higher IQs than the average white person. Most rich white people are in fact complete idiots who cannot read but hide it by making up excuses so the people around them do not realize it. This is due to the complacency of coasting through life on Mommy and Daddy's dollar.

Actually, it's due to white people systematically putting intelligent people into monasteries (or burning them as witches) so that they couldn't breed and pass on their genes for about a thousand years. During this time, the chinese were giving intelligent people well-paid government jobs with which they could support families.

White Crime

Compared to the general population, Albinos have elevated numbers of serial killers. World famous sick fucks like Charles Manson, Jack the Ripper, Andrei Chikatilo, Richard Trenton Chase, Josef Fritzl, Richard Speck, and Jeffrey Dahmer were all white. Hitler, Stalin, and pretty much all your great military madmen were white. Black people seem to be missing some genetic keys that prevent them from being caught right away.

White Music

Pastemonger claim to have created rock music as they claim they've created nearly everything useful, but again, all they did was steal it from the black man. Jazz was created by blacks so that white people couldn't come along and ruin it, but even that has been gentrified. Whites have tried to create their own sub-genre called Heavy Metal claiming it to be their own but they will forever be haunted by the fact their favorite genre was created by "primitive" blacks. Another recent assault on black music by the white man is readily apparent.

White Pride

Moar info: White Nationalism.

This is often expressed through Nazi Rallies in Southeast Amurica, but recent studies of Internets are Serious Fuckin Buisness have shown that the recent "Nips are fucking crazy", often held by no dick teenagers, 9-5 white collar workers, and the majority of Gaming Sites and Cracked users is a subconscious white pride psychosis fueled with their banality, loneliness, and desire to make others follow their ways of life to be just as banal as them.

Hobbies

Though whites have many hobbies, they are generally mediocre at most of them, especially sports, music and sex (all three of which the black race clearly has the upper-hand in). However, there are a few fields where a white person will excel. These include:

Whitey In Action

FACT: This man loves sucking cock
The adventures of white a man


White people in their free time


White people with guns will do this to aggressive blacks!

Typical crazy white people music


A cracka moment



Wow incest,trailerparks,and beer all in one incident

Fucktard makes an idiot of himself on teh internets

Typical white couple


They all look the same to me

U all talk like British ppl

As a subset of the Caucasian race, whitey includes a plethora of diverse backgrounds which include the peoples of Romania, Spain, Sweden, India, Iran, Russia and the Middle East. However, inbreeding is rampant, as evidenced by the various distinct facial features of whites (huge foreheads, long thin crooked noses, eyes too close together, &c.), their ability to become grossly overweight, and the existence of gingers.


TYPE FIVE: These guys are the BEST type of Caucasian because they do not share the same disadvantage with the others for not being white, these guys usually arrange from; Middle Easterners, Iranians, Iraqis, Beaners, South Italians, Lebanese, et cetera. This race is known for its Arab/Negro blood. Case in point: Morocco.

TYPE FOUR: These types of subhuman often reside in the South of Europe, so people such as; Portugee, Italians, Greeks and Spaniards, or what they are commonly known as - PIGS.

TYPE THREE: These types of people are usually the darker germanics - YES! The type which Adolf Hitler was, the Roman Welsh and the dark haired white niggers known as 'Slavs' which includes people from Poland, Russia, Eastern Germany, Hungary and the Czech Republic. These people have the most similar features to the negro.

TYPE TWO: These types are the idiots who are best known for it's inbreeding, crooked teeth and homosexuality. These honkies are also best known for being blond and are always the idiots of all of the white people, most honkies admire them because all whites are secretly as gay as these pricks are and are jealous of their blond curls and good looks, most of these are English, Swedish, Danish, Germans, Welsh and French.

TYPE ONE: These creepy albino sons-of-bitches are definitely the worst type of white... these creeps are best known for stealing souls, being adopted because their parents hated them - Case in point: Annie, being horrible at tanning and being Snow monkeys. Most of these tribes are clueless, primitive and subhuman Celts who are known for their idiocy and supernatural powers! ALL are ginger (apart from Icelandics who are just Albino) and consist of; Scottish, Irish and Icelandics. Just remember, No Dogs, No Niggers and CERTAINLY no Irish!!!

Not all White People Are White

Despite the degrading implications that come with being associated with the white race, there are still those who take pride in pretending they are at least loosely associated with this perverted species of rapists and plunderers. Some examples include:

  • Coconut: Brown on the outside; white on the inside. May be Pakis, Niggers, or Beaners.
  • Oreo: Black on the outside; white on the inside.
  • Apple: Red on the outside; white on the inside. Mostly Injuns and Indians.
  • Twinkie or Banana: Yellow on the outside; white on the inside. Mostly Chinks and Gooks.

A well-known fact about white people is they're essentially all mixed breeds of Eurotrash. Any white person calling themselves "American" is an uneducated Euromutt in denial.

White people get off on telling Mexicans to go back to Mexico (they actually originated from Spain, you dumb hicks), but don't see the irony in the fact that they themselves originated from a bunch of shithole countries in Europe. They also fail to realize that their ancestors got here by boat and banned all the injuns from their own land, stealing it like a gang of niggers.

Politically Correct Alternatives to "White"

If only...
  • Beach-Nigger (for overly tanned people)
  • Betty Crocker (for females)
  • Bleach Boy (for those with skin that's just TOO white)
  • Bogan (aussie white trash)
  • Bro-ho (white woman who dates a black man)
  • Caulkie
  • Chav (British white trash)
  • Cock-Asian
  • Cracker
  • Fag
  • Fishbelly
  • Gai-jin
  • Gavacho
  • Gringo
  • Haole
  • Hay Seed
  • Hick
  • Hillbilly
  • Honkey
  • Hoosier
  • Inbred
  • Maggot
  • Milk Bottle
  • Opie
  • Pink-skin (these retards suffer from denial so powerful that they have actually managed to convince themselves that their skin is white when it is clearly fucking pink)
  • Porch Honkey
  • Redneck
  • Sheethead
  • Wasp (white anglo-saxon protestant)
  • White trash
  • Yuppie

Things White People Hate

  • Being civilized
  • Personal hygiene
  • Black and brown people
  • Jews
  • Not taking your oil
  • Taking away their meth
  • You

Gallery

Gallery of the Cum People About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Quotes

   
 
Support the Ch'ing, annihilate the whites!
 

 
 

— Boxer rebellion slogan

   
 
The common enemy is the white man.
 

 
 

Malcolm X badmouthing his grandpa

   
 
The Chinese people were pained at their lack of benevolence.
 

 
 

— A common complaint even in the 16th century

   
 
Kill Whitey! Kill Whitey! Kill Whitey!
 

 
 

Nelson Mandela sings the song of his people

   
 
Mother Afrika wake up

Before Umulungu rapes you

Before Umulungu rapes you

Wake up Mother Afrika!
 


 
 

— LOL too late

   
 
You Pakeha are thieves! You tear one blanket and make two pieces, which you sell to us for two blankets. You buy a pig for £1 in gold and sell it back to us for three! But what does it matter? We have had our day - Ka tuhoa te ra, ka warara, ka hinga.
 

 
 

— A Maori historian ragequitting

   
 
Paleface speak-um with forked tongue!
 

 
 

— You bet your sweet red ass, Pocahontas!

   
 
They are hairy and green-eyed, just like goblins and demons... who would not run away from them in fright!?
 

 
 

— A wise Japanese scholar, 18th century

   
 
Beyond the Great Sunrise Water, there lived a people who had iron, and those dirty and unnatural things, who seethed with diseases, who fought to death over the names of their gods! They had so crowded and befouled their own island that they fled from it, because excrement and carrion were up to their knees. They came to our island. Our Singers had warned us that a pale people would come across the Great Water and try to destroy us, but we forgot.
 

 
 

— Chief Tenk Wat a'wa explains a regrettable state of affairs

   
 
The pale man originated from the Caucasus mountains, where there was very little plant life and not much means for salt. This condition forced him to rob the Nubian female of her chastity in order to keep his seed alive, it’s called integration.
 

 
 

— Nuwaubian holy writ

   
 
Long nosed, hawk lipped, greedy and brutish... the white foreigners have insatiable barbarian hearts.
 

 
 

— Chinese official grasps the truth, 17th century

   
 
The paleface is a demon

The only thing they feel at all is greed

Beneath that milky hide there's emptiness inside

I wonder if they even bleed?
 


 
 

Disney no speak-um with forked tongue

   
 
Yakub grafted devils and found that it was them causing all the trouble, he then consulted his Imans, directors of the different districts, and they decided to drive them out of the Holy Land. So at high noon (12:00 o'clock) our Holy Black Brothers mounted camels with our favorite weapon drawn, the scimitar, and as Job 30:5 tells, they drove these people from among the Holy People across the Arabian Desert at a distance of 2200 miles to dwell in the cliffs of the valleys, in caves of the earth or holes and in the rocks of Europa (Job 30:6).
 

 
 

— The honorable Louis Farrakhan recounts the settling of Europe

   
 
The more sexual intercourse barbarians have, the lighter their eyes are. Be wary of barbarians with green eyes. Avoid barbarians with blue eyes. And be extremely careful of barbarians with blue eyes and red hair. Those blue-eyed, red-haired devils are the most beast-like in their devouring carnal appetite.
 

 
 

— Dark-eyed Chinese scholar is jelly, 19th century

   
 
There are no good crackers, and if you find one, kill him before he changes.
 

 
 

— A great Nation of Islam philosopher educates the young

   
 
The white men are bad school-masters; they smile in the face of the poor indian to cheat him; they shake them by the hand to gain their confidence, to make them drunk, to deceive them, and ruin our wives. We told them to let us alone; but they followed on and beset our paths, and they coiled themselves among us like the snake. They poisoned us by their touch. We were not safe. We lived in danger. We were becoming like them, hypocrites and liars, adulterers, lazy drones, all talkers, and no workers]].
 

 
 

— Chief Black Hawk down

   
 
They were only created to fight other invading races, to protect the God race Negroids. But they went insane, lost control when they were left unattended. They were never to taste blood. They did, and their true nature came out. Because their reproduction levels were cut short, their sexual organs were made the smallest so that the female of their race will want to breed with Negroids to breed themselves out of existence after 6,000 years. It took 600 years to breed them, part man and part beast.
 

 
 

— Nuwaubian prophet Dwight Yorke knoweth the White Man

   
 
To the Chinese they were known as 'white devils', 'barbarian devils', 'red-haired devils', 'long-nosed devils', 'foreign devils', 'bad-smelling devils' or just 'devils'.
 

 
 

— A common theme becomes apparent

   
 
The white people are like poisonous serpents: when chilled, they are feeble and harmless; but invigorate them with warmth, and they sting their benefactors to death. The white people came among us feeble; and now we have made them strong, they wish to kill us, or drive us back, as they would wolves and panthers. My people wish for peace; the red men all wish for peace; but where the white people are, there is no peace for them, except it be on the bosom of our mother]]. Where today are the Pequot? Where today are the Narragansett, the Mohican, the Pakanoket, and many other once powerful tribes of our people? They have vanished before the avarice and the oppression of the White Man, as snow before a summer sun.
 

 
 

—Chief Tecumseh is bitter

   
 
We, the Elders of Heng-Chow and Ching-Bien, do earnestly pray that the dissolute and abandoned non-human species, who disregard every principle of humanity, may be expelled and prohibited, so that the Flowery Land is not transformed into the abode of naked half-reptiles and mermaids... Would that not be extremely distressing!
 

 
 

— A clarion call by the wise elders of Heng-Chow and Ching-Bien

Cracker Jokes

White people mistakenly believe that they are more highly-evolved and intelligent than black people and chimpanzees! Clearly they are not


Q. What's white and fourteen inches long?
A. Absolutely nothing!
Q. What did a white guy see when he looked at his family tree?
A. A straight line!
Q. Why do so many white people get lost skiing?
A. It's hard to find them in the snow
Q. What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench?
A. The NBA
Q. What do you call 300 white men chasing a black man?
A. The PGA tour
Q. Why do white people like to play hockey?
A. It’s the only way to beat on something black
Q. What's the definition of a white virgin?
A. Any girl who can outrun her father and brothers.
Q. How do you emasculate a white man?
A. Kick his sister in the jaw
Q. What do white women, and tampons have in common?
A. They're both stuck up cunts.
Q. What do you call a white person on fire?
A. A firecracker
Q. What do you call a bunch of white people falling?
A. Avalanche
Q. How did the white lady know her daughter was on the rag?
A. Her son's dick tasted funny
Q. What do you call a white man with a sheep under each arm?
A. A pimp
Q. What do spoiled milk and a white bitch's thighs have in common?
A. They're both white and chunky!
Q. What did the black guy say when he went down on a dirty white bitch who hadn't washed for a week?
A. "Damn, Bitch! I like eatin' crackers with cheese, but this is fuckin' nasty!"

See Also

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Civilization and Great Prophets

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Banned From Scoring

Alex HribalAnthony WarnerAnton BichivinAsa CoonBen MoynihanBilly MitchellBrandon CleggBrian Isaack ClydeCharles BishopClay DukeDillon CosseyFaisal ShahzadFrank JamesHayden JagstHugo JacksonIlya IvanistovJohn EarnestKyle RittenhouseLaaiti EkenstéenLindsay Kantha SouvannarathLogan ClarkMAGABomberMikhail PivnevNasim AghdamNicky ReillyPhilip ManshausRichard ReidRyan RouthSam HydeSebastian BosseSol PaisStephan BallietTodd RogersWillem Van SpronsenWilliam AtchisonYou

 
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