Noah Jacob Harpham

"Colorado Springs Shooting" redirects here. For the 2007 shooting, see Matthew Murray. For the other 2015 shooting a month later, see Robert Lewis Dear. For the 2022 shooting, see Anderson Lee Aldrich.

Lose an iPod to the pigs? This page contains an police hero.

Noah Jacob Harpham
Born	June 10, 1982
Died	October 31, 2015 (aged 33)
Nationality:	Americunt
Highscore	Killed 3, injured 1
Top 50?	Fuck no
Style	FPS, Single player
An Hero?	No (Killed by cops)

After Chris Harper Mercer kicked off October 2015 to a good start with a school shooting, Noah Harpham was inspired to follow his lead. The result was a mass shooting in the streets of Colorado Springs which sadly resulted in the deaths of only 3 noobs. He was at least smart enough to become an hero instead of face 50 years in the slammer with bubba.

Background

Noah Jacob Harpham was born to a very religious family. Not much is known of him and nobody cares since his high score pales in comparison to others. Due to his awkward mumbling and irrational and illogical dislike of christianity, we can assume that he was probably molested as a kid or recently before his assault. The fact that he only made one blog before going postal could also suggest that christian cultists could have brainwashed him and made him into a false flag plant for zionist purposes or something. Who gives a fuck anyways? There's massacres seemingly every damn week now and this loser couldn't kill more than 3 people.

Videos

Shooter's rant Previous Video | Next Video

Graded Score

Graded Score
Kill count:	3/20
Accuracy:	9/20
Style:	12/20 Generic Caucasian Chimpout
Butthurt:	7/20
Bonus:	13/20 Going postal in the streets instead of a school
Total Score: 44/100 (F)

You are the weakest link. Goodbye IRL. See full ranking

Wanted Level:

Mall Cop

See Also

• Beta Uprising - The ongoing insurgency committed by outcast loners
• Colorado - Prone to mass shootings
• Chris Harper Mercer - Another beta degen
• Nghtmrchld26 - The New Life Church, Colorado Springs, shooter
• King Robert - Also attacked Colorado Springs, 28 days later no less!
• Anderson Lee Aldrich - Colorado Springs can't catch a break, huh?

External Links

• Blog - Archive of his blog for when it inevitably goes offline.
• His YouTube

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