Mark Barton

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This page contains an hero.
Mark Orrin Barton
Nationality: Americunt  
Highscore Killed 12, injured 13
Top 25? 25th place
1st: Sir Anders Behring Breivik
2nd: Woo Bum-kon
3rd: Martin Bryant
26th: Aaron Alexis
Style Single player
An Hero? Yes


Mark Barton was an American patriot, dedicated hard worker, Jehovah's Witness, and redneck fuck from Georgia, USA that set out for the high score on July 29, 1999, when he killed his wife and 2 kids then shot up his day trading firm before becoming an hero.

Background

Truly the embodiment of the American Dream.

Mark was a paranoid faggot raised in South Carolina. Despite being a junkie throughout his college years, he somehow managed to get a degree in chemistry but never used it. Eventually he moved back to Georgia and married some bitch named Debra and they had two worthless kids together. Mark however began to distrust Debra and bludgeoned her and her mother to death. He was considered the prime suspect by the piggies, but charges were dropped due to lack of evidence. Mark married some other cunt named Leigh Ann in the hopes to bring himself back up again, but his health went down the drain and he began hallucinating and was extremely depressed. At 6'4" he was also a pretty big guy, showing he was just a gentle giant in need of some love.

The killings

   
 
I killed Leigh Ann because she was one of the main reasons for my demise. ...I know that Jehovah will take care of all of them in the next life. I'm sure the details don't matter. There is no excuse, no good reason I am sure no one will understand. If they could I wouldn't want them to. I just write these things to say why. Please know that I love Leigh Ann, Matthew and Mychelle with all my heart. If Jehovah's willing I would like to see them all again in the resurrection to have a second chance. I don't plan to live very much longer, just long enough to kill as many of the people that greedily sought my destruction.
 

 
 

On July 27, 1999, Mark woke up at 3 in the mawnin and performed a Sneak Attack Critical as he beat Leigh Ann to death with a hammer while she slept. His children were now extremely happy that their bitch mom was dead, but were rekt the next night as Mark got a double kill on them while they were sleeping. On July 29, Mark, a friendly neighbor to all, happily went into work and started chatting with his friends. He then promptly pulled out two pistols and said "I hope this doesn't upset your trading day." before shooting four dead. He then walked over to some other stockbroker's building and killed five more people. However, it took the cops way too long to show up, and Mark escaped. A few minutes later, Mark kidnapped a 13 year old girl and threw her in the back of his pedo van. However, Mark royally fucked up and the girl escaped and called the police. The officers spotted his van a while later, and drove him off into a gas station. Knowing he wouldn't be able to escape, Mark became an hero and was immediately sent to the heavens.

High Score

Graded score
Kill count: 9/20
Accuracy: 15/20 12 kills, 13 injured
Style: 20/20 One liners are always appreciated
Butthurt: 18/20
Bonus: 16/20
Total score: 78/100 (C+)
Enjoy your leaderboard spot while it lasts, dickweed.
See full ranking


Gallery


Mark Barton is part of a series on Are You Ready? [GAME OVERInsert Coin] Go!
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