Budd Dwyer

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Budd was loved by friends and family alike.

Budd Dwyer's last moments captured by Encyclopedia Dramatica's photographer.

Even legends commit human accidents.

Robert Budd Dwyer was a Pennsylvanian politician best known for being the greatest man to ever live.

What Happened

Budd Dwyer is pictured here wasting useful B+ plasmas.

Actually, bitches probably know about this one.

Back then, on January 22, 1987, Dwyer was the Treasurer of Pennsylvania when he was convicted of receiving kickbacks and losing the state's official iPod. Budd was asked to leave, and faced at least 100 years in jail and multiple kicks to the testicles, but did he puss out and let the man tell him what to do? Did he curl up into a ball, suck his thumb, and weep like a child? HELL NO! Instead, he did quite possibly the most awesome thing the world has ever seen.

Our Hero arranged a press conference with as many people and news cameras as possible, and did so on a day when school was closed, so that every child could see him on television while eating a healthy lunch. That day, he made a TL;DR speech to the press in that distinctively rich, manly voice of his, handed some papers out to his colleagues, and then pulled a Smith & Wesson .357 Magnum revolver out of an envelope, stuck it up his mouth, and SHOT HIMSELF ON LIVE TELEVISION!!! FUCKING WIN!!!1!

Some of the last words muttered from the excessively nosebleeding man were "I told you I was hardcore." Everyone freaked the fuck out and turned off their cameras. However, one brave cameraman understood that he was witnessing the advent of a great cultural paradigm shift, and thus kept filming with a raging hard-on. A doctor was called to the scene, but fortunately it was too late. Our hero had already died of lead poisoning.

On the Internets

Betamax videotape copies of the incident spread across '80s America faster than the growing AIDS epidemic. These tapes were favorites among goths and other assholes, such as those douchebags who think that laughing out loud at death scenes in a movie theater is hardcore. These tapes evolved into that lame Faces of Death video series, which is basically crappy/fake footage of IRL deaths cut to really shitty music. Eventually, some retard found the Dwyer tape and showed it to then-famous website that was popular in the early days of the web, Stile. After watching the video as an aphrodisiac and 3 hours of hot fudgepacking, he had an idea. If he put the video on his site as a crappy 10X10 pixel, 56k mpeg (back in 2001 this was epic broadband for internets), he could make massive profit. After spreading the footage to a new generation of basement dwelling losers, he netted $20,000,000 in Internet money. Later, after blowing all of his Jew golds on tranny hookers and cocaine, he sold the rights of the suicide to Mattel so they could make Budd Dwyer action figures (complete with press conference playset and "mystery" envelope!).

A famous YouTuber (and fellow an hero) experiences the Budd Dwyer Effect for the first time. Enjoy.

Pop Culture References

	“	If you've got a problem, suicide will solve it Check out the hook; Budd Dwyer with a revolver...	„
	—You Did It ~ Necro

• Filter wrote a song about Dwyer called Hey Man, Nice Shot. Filter was one of the first of many crappy bands to pay tribute to Dwyer's great accomplishment. Most slacker Gen-X faggots think that the song is about their own an hero Kurt Cobain, but this is only because they are stupid.

• Another shit band, Marilyn Manson, used the clip of Mr. Dwyer saying "No! This will hurt someone!" in one of their lame songs.

• Liberal blubbertub Michael Moore saw the video on the net while searching the site for Japanese scat porn. He loved it so much that he included it into his movie Bowling For Columbine.

• Radio fags Opie and Anthony constantly talk about him on their radio show.

• Former IRL troll Steve Albini's band, Rapeman, recorded an EP dedicated to him titled Budd.

Often Imitated, Never Duplicated

Often known as the "Budd Dwyer" effect, many people have tried their own attempts at epic IRL suicide. However, with the advent of emo music, MySpace, and LiveJournal, 100% of these would-be failures were assured to be complete failures. Many have tried, but Budd was the first, and last, person to accomplish life's equivalence of a flawless victory.

Argentinian Budd Dwyer

A former police chief in Argentina, wanted for committing extremely lulzy acts of torture during the 1970s, finished the game during a live interview with a local news organization.

• An hero

• A news report on the news report

Budd Dwyer Lulz Gallery

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  His moment of glory.
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  Fun for the whole family!
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  An True Hero
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  "No! This will hurt someone!"
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  Budd Dwyer comic strip.
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  The grave of one of the greatest men to ever live.
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  Goodnight, sweet prince of etiquette and win =(
• 
  Budd Dwyer: a great an hero, or THE GREATEST an hero?
• 
• 

See also

• An Hero
• Suicide
• I did it for the lulz
• Shotgun mouthwash
• Christine Chubbuck - Was actually the first person to off herself on television, even before Dwyer but was a woman so no one cared.
• Epic Win

External Links

• Budd Dwyer wannabe; killed himself at a public meeting, but there were no cameras running.
• TOW article
• R. Budd Dwyer at Find a Grave
• Song about Budd Dwyer

	Budd Dwyer is part of a series on An Heroes
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Budd Dwyer is part of a series on The History of The Lulz

[Shut UpSing Me The Song Of My People] In Chronological Order 399BC: First recorded troll-banning 0AD: Knock knock! Who's there? It's Jesus, LOL 571: Birth of Muhahahahahammed 600: Blood orgies 1077: Invention of the meme archive 1100: DEUS VULT! 1337: Start of the Hundred Years War 1492: The Americas are culturally enriched 1573: Tycho doesn't invent the funny webcomic 1605: Guy Fawkes invents terrorism. 1789: The beret is mightier than the crown 1801: Invention of the Triforce 1850: World's first OH EXPLOITABLE image 1865: End of the Nigger Market 1877: Trolling world record broken 1888: First successful mixing of hookers and lulz 1914: World War 1 1927: Teh f1rst sk00l sh00ting 1939: World War 2 1944: The Lollercaust doesn't happen 1945: "Nag? Naga? Well... it's nagonna be there tomorrow that's fore sure." - Harry S Truman 1948: Best Korea is founded (along with Good Korea) 1955: America gets BTFO 1960: Awesomeness of swords discovered 1963: CIA did JFK 1987: First televised An Hero 1993: World Wide Web becomes available, Waco 1999: Counter Strike played IRL 2000: End of teh world due to computer errors. 2001: Bush, Saudis, and Jews do WTC 2004: ED founded 2005: Katrina and 7/7 2007: Cho Seung-Hui becomes the King of School Shooters 2011: Utoya Island Swimming School is opened 2013: ISIS founded 2015: Paris Attacks 2016: Donald Trump is elected president of the United States. (For the lulz.) 2017: Country music is back 2019: First livestreamed kebab removal

Budd Dwyer is part of a series on Politics.

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