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Hugh Jidette

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Hugh Jidette is an old bastard of the "whogivesafuck" party, and a current US presidential candidate who will rule over the United States in 2012 because everybody loves ponies and pie. He is known for being fucking awesome, his short, and straight to the point campaign ads, also his honesty and his lack of respect for babies. His motto's are "Owe Yes!" .. "Borrow like there's no tomorrow!"

Hugh Jidette is the only presidential candidate that has been honest throughout his campaign, vote for him in 2012 and you will get a pony, and a pie!.


Hugh Jidette on National Debt

Hugh is pro-debt, his goals are to double, or triple the debt and just stick our kids with the tab cause srsly the bastards deserve it. To raise unnecessary spending, and increase our debt, he will borrow more money from the chinks, and will buy everyone in the United States, Ponies, and Pie. Because srsly who doesn't love ponies or pie?





   
 
Brainstorm! Change America's name, and when creditors call to collect, tell them "America" moved, and we have no idea where it went! Problem solved! Who wants pie?
 

 
 

—President Candidate Jidette addressing his failbook fans with a brilliant idea.


Hugh Jidette on Taxes

As President Hugh will lower our tax rate to 0% and then raise or drop as he pleases. He promises to use the money gained from US taxes to help build roads, bridges, and schools, but not here, overseas, and he will keep using our taxes to help pay over $100 billion dollars in interest to foreign lenders, helping their economy, while hurting the United States economy.


The war on terrorism

Hugh Jidette doesn't give a flippin' fuck about terrorism, or war, which is why he has nevar mentioned them. When asked, "What is your take on Terrorism?" He replied, "Vote for me, and everyone will receive a pony and a pie!"


History and other useless information

Not much is known about Hugh Jidettes background, all that can be judged of him is he knows what the hell everyone wants, and doesn't give a shit about anyones children, he will only kiss your baby because he's glad he wont have to deal with the National Debt as he is an old bastard, but going off of his Failbook profile:

Currently Running For

Office: President

State: Medium rare, please

District: All your district are belong to Hugh

Party: Yes! And I also "par-TAY" as well!


Current Office

Office: Slacker, but a patriotic one!

State: Of confusion

District: "of Columbia" if I have my way

Party: With other peoples money!

Hometown: Washington, DC (with your help, and lots of money!)


See Also

Sources

Hugh Jidette
is part of a series on Politics.
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See also: 2012 Elections2016 Presidential Elections2020 Presidential Elections2024 USA Presidential ElectionsInternet PoliticsPizzaGatePolitical communitiesRoe v. Wade