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Thomas Watt Hamilton

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This page contains an hero.
Thomas Watt Hamilton
Nationality: Scotfag  
Highscore Killed 17, injured 15
Top 50? 40th
Style Single player
An Hero? Yes


Thomas "Watt" Hamilton was a 43-year-old pedofuck from Scotland who became the UK's luminary High Score winner following his lash-out at Dunblane Primary School on the morning of March 13, 1996 in which he ultimately pwned 17 dumb shits (16 children, 1 teacher) in just under 5 minutes time. Thomas' heroic acts propagated Martin Bryant to orchestrate the Port Arthur Massacre in Ausfailia 6 weeks later, and possibly the Sandy Hook shootings, based on the similarities between each event.

Early Life

Thomas Hamilton was born on 10 May, 1952. His parents divorced in 1955, leaving Thomas in his mother's custody. Nearing his 4th birthday, his name was legally changed to "Thomas Watt Hamilton". Little Tommy grew up in the belief that his mother was his older sister, and was said to be exceedingly close to her throughout his youth.

Sometime in his 20's he occupied a woodcraft shop which specialized in the sale of DIY goods, though he became an oldfag and gave up the shop after 13 years of service in 1985.

Little is known about Mr. Hamilton's youth, suggesting that no-one, not even his relatives genuinely gave a shit.

Scout Service/Boys Clubs (1973 - 1993)

<3

It was around the time Mr. Hamilton graduated from college when he started to leak his pedophilic tendencies into the children of the general public. He would satisfy himself through the foundation of various "Boys Clubs", which he would operate entirely on his own. A number of complaints were made about his leadership, and on at least two occasions he had forced boys to keep him company in his pedovan overnight, his excuse being "he wanted to keep the children warm from the cold weather outside". His official Scout's membership was revoked after parents raised concern over him photographing boys exercising in tight, undersized swimsuits without permission. Regardless, Hamilton would never admit defeat, and would strive towards bonding with the boys that he loved very dearly. Hamilton was known to have formed at least 15 Boys Clubs in his lifetime, with each Club lacking participants and falling to shit. His anger flourished whenever his sexual advancements were protested by lawful douchebags. Hamilton resorted to stock-piling on ammunition and shooting gunz at the range, he came to the realization that he was destined to win the Golden iPod.

   
 
Hamilton was a loner, he wouldn't engage in social conversation with anybody; it is known also that women members didn't particularly like being around him. He was a bit of a creep in their eyes
 

 
 

—Mr. G. S. Crawford, Secretary of the Stirling Rifle and Pistol Club.

Dungoof'd @ Dunblane

Class Setup
Item Accessories/Bonus
  • Secondary: Browning HP
  • A very reliable 9 mm pistol. 18~51 Damage.
  • Secondary: S&W
  • Powerful revolver chambered in .357 25~60 Damage.


On the 13th of March, Wednesday morning, ol' Hammy got fed up with his failed attempts at trying to have fun with little boys and insisted that if he couldn't score some shota ass, he'd smash 'em like eggshells. Thomas had his last cup of tea and crumpets before driving to the school in his Pedovan to wreck shit. Prior to entering the school building, Thomas severed the cables to the telegraph pole using a set of pliers in an attempt to prolong the arrival of law enforcement, however, this telegraph pole only served nearby houses rather than the school. Thomas marched into the school gymnasium where 28 1st-Graders were doing physical education with 3 staff members. Just before some bitch named Eileen Harrild attempted to confront him, Thomas went full Touhou on everybody, roasting 17 cunts and stinging another 15. The kiddy-killer also tried to score bonus points firing shots into a mobile classroom teaching a bunch of 7th-Graders, but failed miserably, only hitting items and other equipment. Thomas then re-entered the gym, feasting his eyes upon the bloodbath he had created. He desperately wanted to caress the small corpses strewn across the floor, but the cops were about to pwn his ass, so he pulled a Budd Dwyer and successfully became An Hero, not to mention that he won the Golden iPod! (UK edition).

Dunblane vs. Sandy Hook

   
 
Media in the United Kingdom compared the shooting to the Dunblane school massacre.
 

 
 

—USAToday.com [1]

  • Both perpetrators arrived on school grounds at approximately 9:30 AM.
  • Both killing sprees lasted less than 5 minutes.
  • Most of the people slayed were 1st-Graders.
  • Deadliest primary/elementary school massacres in British/American history.
  • Both perpetrators shared an interest in pedophilia.

Videos

Garry's Mod

MAH NIGGA U GOT ROASTED

Eileen Harrild describes the horrible delightful events.

Graded Score

Graded score
Kill count: 17/20
Accuracy: 11/20 17 killed, 15 injured.
Style: 15/20 Sk00l Sh00ting
Butthurt: 20/20 UK's version of Columbine!
Bonus: 20/20 Exceptionally fast-paced! Gets the job done quick.
Total score: 88/100 (B)
Most outstanding kiddy-killer in British history.
See full ranking


Wanted Level:
___________________

___________________


Vice Squad


File:Thomas tank engine.png
New Thomas tank engine

See Also


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Spree/One-time Killers:

Aaron AlexisAdam LanzaAlex HribalAlyssa BustamanteAnthony WarnerAudrey HaleBruce Jeffrey PardoCasey AnthonyCho Seung-HuiDevin Patrick KelleyDylan KleboldDylann Storm RoofEric HarrisGerry McCannJames HolmesJared Lee LoughnerJason RodriguezJeff WeiseJiverly Voong Joe StackJosef FritzlLaaiti EkenstéenMark EssexMartin BryantMatthew de GroodMatthew MurrayMatti SaariMaurice ClemmonsPekka-Eric AuvinenRaoul MoatRichard SpeckRobert HawkinsStephen PaddockTim KretschmerTimothy HendronTJ LaneTyler PetersonWade Michael PageWoo Bum-kon

Career/Serial Killers:

Academy ManiacsAdolf HitlerCharles MansonChris BenoitDnepropetrovsk ManiacsDubyaJack the RipperJeffrey DahmerMao ZedongRichard "The Iceman" KuklinskiTed Bundy

Terrorists:

Al QaedaAnders Behring BreivikAnderson Lee AldrichAnton Lundin PetterssonDzhokhar TsarnaevElliot RodgerGeorge SodiniManiacs Murder CultMark EssexNidal Malik HasanOsama bin LadenTamerlan TsarnaevTed Kaczynski

See also:

Antisocial personality disorderJewsMurderParanoid personality disorderPittsburgh Paint JobPolice BrutalitySick fuck

Thomas Watt Hamilton is part of a series on Education

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Those Who Have Died Alone

Aaron AlexisAaron BushnellAaron SwartzAdam LanzaAlexis ArquetteAmanda ToddAmy WinehouseAnal CuntAndy KaufmanAngry GrandpaAnna Nicole SmithAnthony WarnerAsa CoonBrian AdamsBrandon CrispByuuCharmaine DragunCho Seung-HuiChris BenoitChris Harper-MercerChynaCodey PorterDavid BowieDavid CarradineDragoneerEazy-EEdaremElliot RodgerElvis PresleyGeorge SodiniGizgizGleb KorablevHappyCabbieHarambeH.P. LovecraftHeath LedgerJake DavisonJeff WeiseJewWarioJim MorrisonKate SpadeKitty0706Kurt CobainLemonade CoyoteLeelah AlcornLil PeepLiloLoki BlackfangLowtaxMia JaninMegan MeierMichael JacksonMitchell HendersonMySpaceNathan GaleNikita LytkinOtoya YamaguchiPekka-Eric AuvinenPrinceRandy StairRehtaeh ParsonsRicardo LopezRina PalenkovaRipperRobin WilliamsRonnie McNuttRudolph ZurickRyan PalmeterShawn WoolleyShayShuaibySol PaisStephen PaddockSteve StephensThomas Matthew CrooksTony48219TooDamnFilthyTyler DumstorfVester FlanaganWilliam AtchisonXXXTentacionZhao Zewei

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Admirers

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Locations:

ColoradoUnited StatesSchoolSuburbs

Related:

DoomPolice BrutalityPostalSchool ShootingMass ShootingVideo gamesTrenchcoatMarilyn MansonKMFDMRammsteinGothConcerned MotherNewgroundsRyan LambournSchool Shooter: North American Tour 2012The MatrixSouth ParkMichael MooreQuentin Tarantino1990sJack ThompsonGun control

[Stop shooting!Pull the trigger]
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Locus in quo:

Abilene Alleyway Shooting 🔫 Capital Gazette Shooting 🔫 Chris Dorner 🔫 Christchurch mosque attacks 🔫 Colorado Theatre Shooting 🔫 David Long 🔫 Dayton shooting 🔫 El Paso Walmart Shooting 🔫 Elliot Rodger 🔫 Gilroy Garlic Festival Shooting 🔫 Jacksonville Shooting 🔫 Kyle Rittenhouse 🔫 Marjory Stoneman Douglas School Shooting 🔫 Pulse Nightclub Massacre 🔫 Randy Stair 🔫 San Bernardino shooting 🔫 Sandniggers in Paris 🔫 Sandy Hook Elementary Massacre 🔫 Santa Fe High School Shooting 🔫 Shoahdown at the Synagogue of Doom 🔫 Las Vegas shooting 🔫 Texas church shooting 🔫 Umpqua Community College Shooting 🔫 Virginia Beach Shooting 🔫 Washington Navy Yard shooting 🔫 Youtube shooting 🔫

Supporters

Barack Obama 🔫 Christians 🔫 Concerned Mothers 🔫 Democrats 🔫 Dianne Feinstein 🔫 Government 🔫 The Kennedys 🔫 Kurt Eichenwald 🔫 Faggots 🔫 Liberals 🔫 Michael Bloomberg 🔫 Jews 🔫 SJWs 🔫 Sensitive people 🔫 Tara Strong 🔫 Trayvon Martin 🔫 Quinton Reviews

Main ideas:

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Haters gonna hate:

Daisy Hogg 🔫 Killers 🔫 Republicans

Acts of revenge:

Boston Marathon Bombing 🔫 Sandniggers in Paris 🔫 Ariana Grande Massacre 🔫 London Bridge Attack 2017 🔫 Capital Gazette Shooting

Objectors:

Charlton Heston 🔫 James Holmes 🔫 NRA 🔫 Osama Bin Laden 🔫 Republicans 🔫 People planning a massacre 🔫

Pre-2012 Gun Massacres

Columbine 🔫 École Polytechnique 🔫 Dawson College 🔫 Virginia Tech Massacre 🔫 Austin, Texas 🔫 NIU Valentine's Day Massacre 🔫 Hungerford Massacre 🔫 Anders Breivik

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Failures

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Related Pages

90 Day JaneAn hero dayask.fmAutoerotic asphyxiationColumbineGolden iPodHeaven's GateHigh ScoreHow to become an heroJeffrey EpsteinMydeathspacePseudocideShotgun mouthwashSuicideSuicidal FailureThe Great Sonic-cide of 2007Threatening suicideVirginia Tech massacreWaco


Featured article January 17 & 18, 2016
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