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CopperCab
CopperCab, (Powerword: Michael Tyler Kitrell; AKA CopperCunt, CopperFag, CottonCrab, Virgin Toaster Fucker, Michael Faggabon, Michael Caparella, Simpopotamus and at one point; Claire Kittrel⚧) is a ginger, redneck-turned-SJW, simp, off again on again furry, and 32-year old yank butterton with a speech impediment, dental plan, and possibly bipolar disorder. He It is butthurt about his its lack of soul and is on a rage quest to let the world know just how gangsta a coppertop can be. Coppatoppa lets on to the public eye of the tubes that the South Park episode 'Daywalkers' 'Ginger Kids' (being srs bznz) has led it to consider an heroism. CopperCab cares to inform you that gingers, unlike Jews, have souls, and will keep making videos to demonstrate this ad nauseum. Needless to say, once the ever present, never forgetting, never forgiving viewers of yootoob and everything Nets became aware of this, the gears of the Internet Hate Machine started slowly turning, and great lulz ensued. Many EDiots are preparing for another Youtube Civil War. Below is an amalgamation of the videos which show Michael's RAEG; if you want to see an absolute mindfuck then try watching them all at the same time.
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History of CopperCab
'Twas before November, South Park made an episode, trolling gingers. After being made fun of at school, CopperCab experiences extreme butthurt and, like any other asshat, takes his raeg out on the teh interwebz, creating his first video. After loads of butthurt from IshatOnU, CopperCab makes a second video full of screaming and how much he hates the haters. He then makes a third video, trolling more on IshatOnU. After a series of bullshit CopperCab posted a message on his YouTube page stating that he talked to IshatOnU in private, claiming that he was actually a cool guy. However, this wasn't the end of his problems. Much to the disliking of CopperCab, The internet was flooded with over 9000 remixes despite the fact that the videos had only been up for about 2 weeks. CopperCab then makes a video about how he's so angry at the remixes and that we don't have the right to make fun of him. (But he doesn't care, so it's all good.) Soon after, South Park makes an episode parodying him, following hilarity and butthurt from the ginger community. Fueled by rage and semen, CopperCab makes his 7th video, asking why the media is doing this again. This currently leaves Teh CoppaToppa Chronicles to a "To be continued..." status.
The Soulless Ginger-Fuck Himself
CopperCab in general is a fat, soulless ginger with a dental plan who has Tourette's syndrome. He is pretty much a minor Chris-Chan clone, but isn't nearly as much of an inconsiderate fucktard. He is a newfag to life, and believes that the term "Ginger" was created last Thursday by South Park, when in reality, the word "Ginger" has been used since the dawn of man. He also believes that everyone has the right to make videos. Half of his videos are him BAAAWWWWWing about how much his life sucks, and the other half rants on about how gingers are always getting discriminated, claiming that blacks, asians, and mexicans are never called names (like nigger, rice nigger, and mexican). He usually films his videos in weird-ass places, such as an alleyway or a park. This is obviously and attempt to lure us away from the fact that he is a basement-dwelling bastard. Often times, he attempts to unite ginger colonies to zerg rush haters, while constantly referring to gingers as their own separate race. This is far from the truth as gingers do not deserve to be one separate race. He frequently denies his destiny of an heroism, claiming that if he died, haters and trolls will have victory and become winrar. He makes up having friends while also making up sob-stories to trick us into believing that he isn't an antisocial lowlife. However, his main source of lulz does not come from the above facts. No; CopperCab is an epic lolcow because of his constant random-tantrums. As said above, he has multiple personalities: one being a calm-like, troubled, ginger who only wants to make things right by informing everybody that he has gone through enough in life, while the other is a verbal Bruce Lee who will ear-rape you for your sins. During these shoops of da whoops, he will usually do hand and face motions that look so fucking weird that it just makes him evern more lulzy. The aftermath of these RAGE explosions usually results in him staring into our souls as if he was thinking of diabolical plots to steal them in his envy-fueled mind. He suffered from massive butthurt when faithful internet users mass flagged his facebook account, causing him to be banned, resulting in lulz and win.
Typical CopperCunt haiter
Sadly, as fucking stupid as CopperCab is, at least 42% of his haters are even worse. An example of this young gentleman who amazingly enough, thought it was a good idea to post a video of himself joining in on the gangbang on CopperCab to quell his own insecurities even though he is OVER 9000 times the retarded faggot that CopperCab is.
CopperCab on paper
CopperCab HATES Boxxy
On January 15, 2011, Coppercab decided that He would blame Boxxy for all his problems in life. In his new video he said that Boxxy is responsible for all the trolls that have been targeting him. He even starts crying towards the end of the video, he even goes as far to claim that Boxxy is the creator of all the trolls on the internets, and that the only reason she is back is because of cash. Also on his channel, you can see the banner at the top calling himself "King of /b/" lol. Also despite making videos of Boxxy, the beginning of the video, you will lulz moar then you will care. BAU8H
...But He Does "Love" His Gramma
Or at least, between fits of incoherent rage, he simulates it.
Coppacalypse
In a shocking turn of events, on July 20th,2011 CopperCab's account was hacked by another dickless and possibly soulless vampire who won't even show his face. The video the posted by the UBER 1337 HAX0R was a tutorial of how to put on a condom, and is probably his painfully unfunny attempt at trying to be funny.
This meant CopperFaggot could no longer post videos of himself screaming incoherently at a camera while jumping around like a five year old with a temper tantrum. So CopperCab did what any fat ginger was capable of, and cried to his scary grandma about the hacker.
But beware CopperHacker. Because you have messed with one super angry firecrotch, and with all his rage, Coppercab will strike back and a chain of events will lead to the Rise of the Planet of the Gingers. But in reality, Copper Cab makes a video of himself crying like a bitch over how the hacker won't give him his account back. However it's most likely just a publicity stunt just like the rest of his videos.
The White-Knights
Since CopperFaggot's main channel got hacked, many other faggots made videos white-knighting their fat ginger king by telling the hacker to give CopperCab his account back, so he could continue making videos of his assburgers fuelled rage. But in the end, Michael got his account back, free to spread more of his faggotry onto the internet.
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CopperCab's Girlfriend
Lauren, who goes by the YouTube username 'IrenicHippyKin' has the intelligence equal to that of a rock and has the body of a monstrous hambeast, but yet, is still too good for CopperCab. Sadly enough, all her videos were baleeted by someone with UBER L33T HAX0RS, In the end, she says he was a pretty cool guy (no, srsly).
After cutting her wrists in her bathroom from extreme butthurt due to those darn trolls saying nasty things like, "MAN THE HARPOONS", she returned in front her camera to answer some questions her fans have been dying to ask and to talk about her life and opinions on things. Lauren shows off how much of a Hippie she is by using such vocabulary such as "Aura" and "We are children of the Earth" and saying that when she is sitting on the ground, she feels connected with the Earth, which we all know means that she is a sick fuck with Dirt Fetish. She also has a need to discuss these deep, meaningful topics with someone who understands her, which only applies to people who are batshit insane.
In the end, Lauren and Micheal finally had their inevitable Earth-shattering breakup and still continued to remain a bloated land whale; eventually discovering that her videos were being featured here on ED, leading to her removing all her videos, in a desperate attempt to cover up her whale shaped tracks. To this day, Lauren has done fuck all apart from post pointless bullshit on herTumblr and occasionally posts bullshit of equal importance on her irenichippykin.
The Morality Club
The Morality Club is a channel organised by Michael and his friends. He explains that the channel will revolve around him and his christfag friends talking about what to do and what not to do and instilling good morals, because the current generation doesn't care about that. He says that a lot of people need this because they shouldn't be making fun of a ginger faggot who screams at a camera about his shitty world views because that's bad morals and it hurts his feelings. Their first video was supposed to release on July 1st, 2012, but nothing has happened to this day.
Southern Redneck Incest
In this video, Coppercab strongly hints that he had a sexual relation with his second cousin at a family reunion. Akin to stereotypical redneckness, he has a cool jacket with no shirt, and justifies his incestuous relationship.
CopperCab Fun Facts
- CopperCab has multiple personalities, one being a non-racist christian ginger and the other a straight up nigra ginger dat needs sum chikins
- CopperCab gots the same rights as everyone on yootoob
- CopperCab can make videos whenever, and however he wants
- CopperCab don't care what you say, so get outta here!
- Coppercab has contemplated suicide.
- Coppercab's favorite genre of music is rap, next to DUBSTEP; HE FUCKING LOVES DUBSTEP
- CopperCab knows it's not okay to make fun of niggers and spics despite once making an impersonation of Milo Yiannopoulos sucking a Big Black Cock. (Here).
- CopperCab has big lips like a dick suckin' BAWWWWWWWin' nigra
- CopperCab's favorite food is ShitMcNuggets.
- CopperCab believes that the stereotype for gingers is some new shit that just happened yesterday
- CopperCab doesn't give a fuck if you think his singing is bad
- CopperCab just wants us all to get along...FAG!
- CopperCab is a ginger and proud of it
- CopperCab like all gingers, lacks a soul, he also lacks a gallbladder
- CopperCab has a message for all you fuckin' haters out there. Alright bro? Alright broskies?
- CopperCab puts up with enough shit at school! and doesn't deserve to be treated like crap
- CopperCab thinks South Park is serious business
- CopperCab knows you want him to stop making videos, but HES NOT GANNA!!!!
- CopperCab is fucking fat, so if he's in any way Irish he sure as hell has no idea what a potato famine is
- CopperCab needs to get laid!
- CopperCab can bite back. (gromph)
- CopperCab is just doin' his own thing, man!
- CopperCab hates the fact that y'all misconstroood, the fucking video.
- CopperCab knows we wouldn't understand his depression
- CopperCab likes to rage like a ragefag.
- CopperCab hates Boxxy.
- CopperCab is a humanoid based meme given life.
- CopperCab has a crush on Sharon
- CopperCab believes that niggas can say nigga, but whites can't.
- CopperCab thinks he can say ginger, but daywalkers and sane people can't.
- CopperCab dresses up as characters from 'Alice in Wonderland'
- CopperCab thinks you're his "Broski's."
- CopperCab enjoys Uwe Boll movies.
- CopperCab is a contributor to The Eunuch Archive.
- CopperCab plays Runescape
- CopperCab is a failtroll.
- CopperCab loves pumkins. Gaaaawd.
- CopperCab gave up on equality for gingers because he's now stalking a girl and thinks its a better use of his time.
- CopperCab thinks the girl he's stalking is his girlfriend.
- CopperCab has no real friends because of his internet dramaz.
- CopperCab is still in high school even thou he's like 21 he still pretends he's only 18.
- CopperCab's Twitter and dumblr accounts are SJW Hellholes spreading the cancer that is killing the internet.
- CopperCab is racist.
- CopperCab is a Nazi.
- CopperCab is Hitler's grandson and wishes for the extermination of every other race on the earth except Gingers.
- CopperCab's parents made videos stealing his camera and SUPPORTING him to curse! Way to go parents!
- CopperCab thinks he can make up laws and spread them via is videos.
- CopperCab doesn't have a penis, it's true he admitted it!
- CopperCab thinks wimminz are the stronger sex.
- CopperCab accidentally (or on purpose) spits on the camera lens at least once every video. (It's true!)
- CopperCab isn't an actor.
- CopperCab fucked his second cousin.
- CopperCab fucked a toaster.
Parodies arounds teh Internetz
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Notable Quotables
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Quotes by CopperCab
The Many Faces of CopperCab
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CopperCab Impersonating Azns.
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The face of a believer
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He's either trying to steal your soul or is going to fist his camera.
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Bitches Don't Know Bout His Soul.
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NO U!
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Mad Ginger is Mad.
YouTube Comments
You are bound to see these comments:
- U MAD?
- R.I.P
- This isn't funny anymore.
- You have no Soul
- Your always yelling
- you have more issues than i realized.Normal rational people would not be pissed off and go on an anger rampage when posting a youtube video.
- To bad you didnt die on the operating table
- LOL ,YOU have a penis shapped head ... PENIS HEAD
- I heard he died after he uploaded this.
- Anger issues, hmm I wonder what would make them think that? Perhaps the persistent shouting and whining like a bitch.
- your eyes are really fucking close together.........
- You're like a big red pissed off lobster...
- My favorite pissed off Strawberry is back
- Vagina Forehead
- Oh My God! Get a fire extinguish-Oh, that's his hair...
- FAT FUCK!
- You're sick of OUR Shit? Hey, Jackass....maybe if you weren't such a whiny, emo drama queen, people wouldn't be sick of YOUR shit.
- Dear coppercab i find you to be an extremely butt-hurt nublet who plays runescape (so do i but im cool) Your just a little rage fag ginger whom rips his ideas from people >:( i fucking hate you soooooo much i cant describe me hate for you i hate your ginger ass i hate your ginger parents i hope after reading this message you will cry yourself to sleep for 5 years then die you FUCKING boob GOD im soooo pissed off just thinking about you makes me want to kill baby monkeys. Just fucking destroy your computer and burn the pieces and i want you to know you 3 are the only gingers i hate not cause your hair not cause your freckles because you FUCKING TROLL SOOOO MUCH. GO DIE IN A PIT
- Have you got aids from your transgendered friend?
- I want to kill you in your fat fuck of a bed.
- If you want ginger kids then why is your transgendered partner not ginger?
- Your a complete fail but at least your dead now!!!!
- Fuck the Fuck off you Cherry Kool-aid Haired Caulksucker!
- This is what a liberal looks like
- Kill yourself fatass liberal trash
- Ginger.
And the comments you will see after his transition:
Hollywood Hillbillies
In January, 2014, Reelz began broadcasting his new television show, Hollywood Hillbillies. In it, he works with his agent, David Weintraub,✡ to capitalize on that e-fame while it's still less than five years old. Weintraub brought the entire family to California so we could watch this YouTube superstar find work in Hollywood and become IRL famous. The real star of this abomination is his grandmother, "Mema", who is a typical white woman from the American South. Fat, racist and hilarious, Mema never fails to deliver lulz.
—Mema, tells it like it is |
—Mema, Who thinks the little shit can rap |
In October 2015, Mikey made the trip back to Grayson, after Reelz failed to renew Hollywood Hillbillies for another season. Mikey still raps, and his music can be found at Bandcamp.com, along with several other MySpace bands not worthy of a real contract.
Another Internet tranny
Last Thursday, Michael came out as a proud member of the elite club of the seemingly never ending stream of hideous trannies who are addicted to the Internet, once again proving that the Internet makes you gay or a lesbian tranny. Ever since he adopted the name "Claire", the internet has coined the term "Transginger" to describe the sloppy pathetic fuckwit. Some believe that Claire is trolling what's left of his followers:
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Meeting Chris-chan
On October 23, 2017, in a singularity of faggotry, CopperCab did an interview with Chris-Chan. He is a huge fan of the legendary creator of Sonichu. They had a great deal in common and lulz were had by the viewing audience.
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Gingers STILL have Souls??
On January 14th, 2020 (10 years after the Gingers Have Souls video), CopperTard shat out a video, saying that Ginger STILL (don't) have souls. This time, Copper is at a park, in front of a tree with a dick drawn on it. This is a painfully obvious anniversary video with nothing else to be said, other than the fact his hair migrated south, turing into an unshaved shitbeard and making Mike look like a Leprechaun with Leukemia and Down's Syndrome.
Streams and CCM
Somewhere in late 2019, the day when CopperFaggot officially became too fucking fat and lazy to even go outside to yell at his camera has struck our good old Mike; so he decided that he might as well have his uncontrollable autistic tantrums at the comfort of his own mancave where the only source of light is his monitor and cheap-ass LED lights; and best of all, it's live! Copper has eventually settled on a school LARP format for his livestreams, where he would "teach" his audience about the wonderfulness that is Social Justice and how St. Patrick's Day is "racist".
Of course, all that while he gets interrupted by $10 donation messages that are read out by TTS, usually driving Copper into a chimpout. You'd think Copper would easily disable the TTS feature, but he's either too retarded or too much of a jew to do so. So he just chimps out about TTS donation messages sent by "Class Clowns" or "Rotten Eggs", who are really just retards who still buy into this shit, emptying their mothers' wallets for cheap lulz.
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Here's a list of wacky shit that happens on CopperFatass's streams.
- Copper performs a 2-minute-long introduction before the first donation.
- Copper reacts to a video.
- Copper simps for Belle Delphine.
- Copper fucks a toaster.
- Copper shuts off the camera and BAWWWWWs to the microphone.
- Copper gets muted; he jumps up and down in a fit of rage and spits a mixture of saliva and semen on his camera during the enitre process.
- Copper writes someone's name down on a board for every single donation with le rood message on it.
- Copper pulls out "THE BIG BOOK" (a book where keeps track of the Clowns' unforgivable crimes such as calling him a simp), especially if one's extra naughty at any given moment.
- Copper asks for "111"s in the chat.
- Copper calls his Gram.
- Copper's sister Aubrey puts an egg on his bald shiny head.
- Copper dresses up as an orange Pink Guy clone and twerks.
- Copper ragequits.
See Also
External Links
- CopperCab - Main YouTube Channel
- CopperVision - Secondary YouTube Channel
- Silver Sedan - An archive channel for his streams.
- discord.gg/coppercab - CopperCab Discord Server
- CopperCab Facebook
CopperCabNew - Second Main YouTube Channel(Obsolete - He previously uploaded the GIVE IT BACK!! video on this channel first)- CopperCab on Twitter (The Irony of it all is that he follows ED on twitter)
- coppersalt CoppaToppa's latest Twitch account; Read: "Copper Salt"
CopperCab on Tumblr(404'd)- copcab
- CopperMomAndDad - A parody channel of CopperCab's pretending to be his parents.
- T-Shirts - CopperCab sells T-shirts. If you see any whiteknights wearing these, drown them in gasoline and throw a lit matchstick at them for great justice.
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CopperCab is part of a series on Visit the Music Portal for complete coverage. |
CopperCab is part of a series on Visit the Trolls Portal for complete coverage. |
CopperCab is part of a series on Visit the Social Justice Portal for complete coverage. |
CopperCab is part of a series on Aspies. | [Sperg out] |
CopperCab is part of a series on Enemies of the Lulz | ||||||||||||
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Featured article August 6 & August 7, 2016 | ||
Preceded by LeafyIsHere |
CopperCab | Succeeded by Trolling Induced Transsexuality Syndrome |