Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Aaron Howard

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Aaron Howard was a 37-year-old father of three from Abilene, Texas, who, on September 1, 2018, made the brilliant decision to bring a baseball bat to a shirtless redneck gunfight and ended up experiencing first hand the almighty power of a true Texan's God-given Second Amendment rights as he was filled with lead and fucked up worse than JFK's head. Aaron Howard's stupidity was recorded and released by his fiance on Facebook for the whole world to witness the common, yet rarely filmed instance of An hero by redneck.


The Dispute

An artist's depiction

Following an inane dispute with his neighbors—67-year-old John Miller and his 31-year-old son, Michael Miller—over a fucking mattress, Aaron armed himself with a baseball bat, Michael armed himself with a shotgun and John armed himself with a big iron on his hip. After preparing for battle and getting his fiancée, Kara Box, to stop taking selfies and use her fucking iPhone to film the ensuing slaughter, Aaron informed the Millers that he was going to kill them, began calling them faggots and repeatedly told them to point their guns at him.

If you see this, your death is near


The Resolution

John Miller in handcuffs

After threatening the Millers and screaming like a deranged gorilla for two whole minutes, Aaron eventually made the hilarious decision to attack John Miller – at which point he was promptly shot twice in self-defense. Still not willing to accept that the gun is mightier than the baseball bat, Aaron then proceeded to hurl the baseball bat at John like a little bitch, causing minimal damage before Michael stepped in and finished him off with several shotgun blasts to the face. Kara then began whining about her dead husband – ironic considering that she was too goddamn useless to even tell him to knock it the fuck off and stop threatening to murder their neighbors over a fucking mattress.

The Aftermath

Despite being a clear-cut case of self-defense despite the Miller family's provocation, the Millers were soon arrested and charged with first-degree murder. They were eventually released on bond after some months and then the trial finally happened in January 2023, after a long delay due to jewflu. Michael Miller, the young buck with the buckshot, was found not guilty. His father, on the other talon, was found guilty and sentenced to 14 years of very gay buttsecks, with the possibility of buttrest after 7 years. He will sadly probably become dust before being realeased. The end.

Gallery

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

See Also

External Links

  • Full Uncensored video of the pwnage
  • [reporternews.com/story/news/crime/2020/04/17/abilene-alleyway-murder-trials-johnnie-miller-michael-miller-james-hicks-aaron-howard/5141276002/ 2021 and trial still delayed.

[reporternews.com/story/news/local/2023/01/27/abilene-alley-shooting-father-guilty-of-murder-not-son-in-killing/69846345007/ jewish DA got one of 'em.


Aaron Howard
is part of a series on
An Heroes

[iPod][Xbox]
Died Alone

1-14 Jakarta AttacksAaron BushnellAaron HowardAaron SwartzAcidChanAdam LanzaAdolf HitlerAkbarzhon DzhalilovAlan TuringAlexis PilkingtonAmanda ToddAn HaloAndrea PignaniAndrew KehoeAndrew KoenigAnthony WarnerAnton Lundin PetterssonArtyom KazantsevAsa CoonAugust AmesBen VoddenBob8466Brandon CleggBrandon CrispBrandon HoleBrenda WilliamsBrigit GonzalezBroadt LedetBruce PardoBubba CopelandBudd DwyerCandyjunkieArcan CetinCharles BishopCharmaine DragunChloe SagalChris BenoitChris DornerChristine ChubbuckChristopher FosterChris Harper-MercerCho Seung-HuiClay DukeCodey PorterDavid RitchesonDerrick BirdDevin KelleyDustin MichaelsDylan KleboldElliot RodgerEmma JonesEric HarrisEtikaEuler GrandolphoGeorge HennardGeorge SodiniGizgizGleb KorablevHannah BondHeath LedgerHunter S. ThompsonIsrael KeyesJake RobertsJames LeshkevichJarrad WillisJaylen FrybergJeff WeiseJenny GrantJewWarioJiverly VoongJodie Gater and Stephanie GestierJoe StackJohn HouserJonathan Kendrick LewisJosé BettsJürgen ConingsKevin Neil WhitrickKlerckKurt CobainLeelah AlcornLivecorpseLowtaxMatthias SchoormannMario FerreyraMarvin HeemeyerMcSkilletMegan MeierMercedes HerreraMia JaninMitchell HendersonMr. HandsMatti SaariJosh BallardNathaniel BerhowNghtmrchld26Nikita LytkinNikki CatsourasOldDirtyBtardOtoya YamaguchiPanya KhamrabPaula GoodspeedPekka-Eric AuvinenPetri GerdtPhilip MarkoffQuentin HubbardRachele RuddRehtaeh ParsonsRicardo LopezRichard JeniRina PalenkovaRobert CardRobert HawkinsRobin WilliamsRonnie McNuttRudolph ZurickRyan PalmeterSadie DavilaSalman AbediSam LeesonShane HalliganShaun DykesShawn WoolleyShayShuaibySol PaisStephanie Michelle BrownStephen KazmierczakStephen HuffStephen PaddockStiletto oneTang YongmingTatiana the TigerTerry DavisThe An Heroes of BridgendTim KretschmerTimothy HendronTony48219Tyler ClementiTyler DumstorfTyler PetersonVerne TroyerWilliam Atchison

Failures

Adf-fuensalidaAhuviya HarelAlek MinassianAmber ButtrumAmy BishopAnton BichivinAriana RaykottoAudrey HaleAydin PaladinBernie MadoffBrandon ClarkBrenda SpencerBrian ClydeBrian ConnorsBrook HigginsCampo DelgadoCharles ZieseCobanermani456Colonel McBadassCrystal ShinkleDavid GrayDeWayne CraddockDimitrios PagourtzisDmitry VinogradovDylann RoofGabe ParkerGeorge StinneyHugo JacksonIlnaz GalyavievImma-The-DeerJakrapanth ThommaJames HubertyJamethJarrod RamosJeffree MoonJessica EvertJonathan RossJoseph CampJustin-anonLindsay SouvannarathLolo FerrariMamoru TakumaMartin BryantMary BellMichael CarnealMichael GimsonMissyMychal BellNeograntNikkineko333Nikolas CruzNoah EsbensenNuzzieKomaOwen WilsonPikacat39PogoRooRainBoy107Richard ReidRandan FontaineRex FowlerRobert CrimoRobert LongSalvador RamosShaan SinghShinji AobaSienna JohnsonSirtom93SneakylizardStephen FryTakeShotActionTimur BekmansurovTJ LaneToaster SteveTom PrestonTooDamnFilthyTumbles the StairdragonViper

Related Pages

90 Day JaneAn hero dayask.fmAutoerotic asphyxiationColumbineGolden iPodHeaven's GateHigh ScoreHow to become an heroJeffrey EpsteinMydeathspacePseudocideShotgun mouthwashSuicideSuicidal FailureThe Great Sonic-cide of 2007Threatening suicideVirginia Tech massacreWaco

[Stop shooting!Pull the trigger]
Aaron Howard is part of a series on Gun Control
Locus in quo:

Abilene Alleyway Shooting 🔫 Capital Gazette Shooting 🔫 Chris Dorner 🔫 Christchurch mosque attacks 🔫 Colorado Theatre Shooting 🔫 David Long 🔫 Dayton shooting 🔫 El Paso Walmart Shooting 🔫 Elliot Rodger 🔫 Gilroy Garlic Festival Shooting 🔫 Jacksonville Shooting 🔫 Kyle Rittenhouse 🔫 Marjory Stoneman Douglas School Shooting 🔫 Pulse Nightclub Massacre 🔫 Randy Stair 🔫 San Bernardino shooting 🔫 Sandniggers in Paris 🔫 Sandy Hook Elementary Massacre 🔫 Santa Fe High School Shooting 🔫 Shoahdown at the Synagogue of Doom 🔫 Las Vegas shooting 🔫 Texas church shooting 🔫 Umpqua Community College Shooting 🔫 Virginia Beach Shooting 🔫 Washington Navy Yard shooting 🔫 Youtube shooting 🔫

Supporters

Barack Obama 🔫 Christians 🔫 Concerned Mothers 🔫 Democrats 🔫 Dianne Feinstein 🔫 Government 🔫 The Kennedys 🔫 Kurt Eichenwald 🔫 Faggots 🔫 Liberals 🔫 Michael Bloomberg 🔫 Jews 🔫 SJWs 🔫 Sensitive people 🔫 Tara Strong 🔫 Trayvon Martin 🔫 Quinton Reviews

Main ideas:

Assault Rifle 🔫 Gun 🔫 Gun Control 🔫 Murder 🔫 Arson 🔫 Bombs 🔫 Mass Shooting 🔫 School Shooting 🔫

Haters gonna hate:

Daisy Hogg 🔫 Killers 🔫 Republicans

Acts of revenge:

Boston Marathon Bombing 🔫 Sandniggers in Paris 🔫 Ariana Grande Massacre 🔫 London Bridge Attack 2017 🔫 Capital Gazette Shooting

Objectors:

Charlton Heston 🔫 James Holmes 🔫 NRA 🔫 Osama Bin Laden 🔫 Republicans 🔫 People planning a massacre 🔫

Pre-2012 Gun Massacres

Columbine 🔫 École Polytechnique 🔫 Dawson College 🔫 Virginia Tech Massacre 🔫 Austin, Texas 🔫 NIU Valentine's Day Massacre 🔫 Hungerford Massacre 🔫 Anders Breivik