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Brian Isaack Clyde: Difference between revisions
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{{Ibrow|'''[[Highscore]]'''|[[fail|NO KILLS, NO INJURIES]]}} | {{Ibrow|'''[[Highscore]]'''|[[fail|NO KILLS, NO INJURIES]]}} | ||
{{Ibrow|'''Top 50?'''|Not by a long shot}} | {{Ibrow|'''Top 50?'''|Not by a long shot}} | ||
{{Ibrow|'''Style'''|FPS, | {{Ibrow|'''Style'''|FPS, Single player}} | ||
{{Ibrow|'''[[An Hero]]?'''|No (killed by police)}} | {{Ibrow|'''[[An Hero]]?'''|No (killed by police)}} | ||
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{{GradedScore|0|WHAT A FAIL|0|[[LOL|Missed every shot]]|5|At least he looked like he could do something, but he couldn't|3|Only mentioned in local news|0|Pathetic|8|F-|ONLY STEERS AND QUEERS COME FROM TEXAS, GUESS WE KNOW WHICH ONE HE IS!}} | {{GradedScore|0|WHAT A FAIL|0|[[LOL|Missed every shot]]|5|At least he looked like he could do something, but he couldn't|3|Only mentioned in local news|0|Pathetic|8|F-|ONLY STEERS AND QUEERS COME FROM TEXAS, GUESS WE KNOW WHICH ONE HE IS!}} | ||
{{Wanted|1}} | {{Wanted|1}} | ||
Revision as of 23:03, 4 March 2024
|
BIGGEST FAIL OF 2019 BY FAR |
|
| |
|---|---|
| Brian Isaack Clyde | |
| Born | September 30, 1996 |
| Died | June 17, 2019 (aged 22) |
| Nationality | Americunt 
|
| Occupation | Armyfag, basement dweller |
| Highscore | NO KILLS, NO INJURIES |
| Top 50? | Not by a long shot |
| Style | FPS, Single player |
| An Hero? | No (killed by police) |
When you think of all the faggots who failed at going on a rampage, who comes to mind? The fatass Asa Coon? Brandon Clegg? Maybe even ED's own AlGore? Well, just as your stupid ass was thinking about it, A NEW CHALLENGER APPEARS! After being fed up with being ass-raped constantly in boot camp, some 22-year-old armyfag from Texas named Brian Isaack Clyde decided to go postal near a government building for some fucking reason. He looked like he was ready to cause some lulz, due to his military training and being armed with an assault rifle with several mags and military gear. Unfortunately, no lulz were gained that day. Brian didn't think that shooting up a public building would probably result in him getting b& from life. He tried to shoot his way out of his troubles (WHILE HITTING NO ONE), but the cops pulled up with the van and shot him dead. For some reason, the cops tried to revive this neckbeard but alas, Clyde died in a puddle of his own piss. Then everyone went about their day, and in a matter of hours no one remembered this fucker even shot up anything because he was that much of a failure.
If anything is to be gained from this, it just shows that edgy kids, Azns, autists, washed-up old men, and even Muslims are better at mass shootings than a trained soldier.
Video Manifesto
Quotes
—Clyde, bragging about his ammo count but failing to use any of it. | ||
Previous Quote | Next Quote
Graded Score
| Kill count: | 0/20 WHAT A FAIL |
|---|---|
| Accuracy: | 0/20 Missed every shot |
| Style: | 5/20 At least he looked like he could do something, but he couldn't |
| Butthurt: | 3/20 Only mentioned in local news |
| Bonus: | 0/20 Pathetic |
Wanted Level:
Mall Cop
Gallery & Gameplay Footage
-
Ladies... -
-
what is this... -
-
Ur stance is shit -
Blurry pic from shooting -
This photo was nominated for (but didn't win) the Pulitzer Prize for Breaking News Photography
See Also
- Patrick Crusius - Better Texas gunslinger who became the top scorer on the US servers of 2019.
- Woo Bum-kon - Soldier shooter done right.
- Ian David Long - American soldier with a decent score.
- Fail
- High Score
- Texas
- Mass Shooting
- Sol Pais - His female counterpart.
- Asa Coon - His fat counterpart.
- William Atchison - His ED counterpart.
- Logan Clark - His knifer counterpart.
- Cesar Sayoc - His bomber counterpart.
