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Revision as of 08:17, 10 December 2024

Conspiracy Alert
The subject of this article is the victim of a massive conspiracy by the Social Mafia. You should trust noone and come to your own conclusions after careful consideration of the facts.
BREAKING NEWS!!
He's Arrested
Luigi Mangione
Born July 21, 1998 (26 years old)
Nationality: Americunt  
Highscore Killed 1
Top 50? No
Style FPS, Single player
An Hero? No


The Hero we don't deserve, but what we need

In the sleek halls of Midtown Manhattan’s business district, where power suits and overpriced lattes reign supreme, few dared to question the untouchable fortress that is Corporate America—until Luigi Mangione decided to write his own chapter.

A Modern-Day Teddy K?

Mangione, a valedictorian with CompSci degrees from the University of Pennsylvania, seemed destined for the Silicon Valley dream: stock options, a standing desk, and ethically dubious startup ventures. But somewhere between algorithm optimization and attending fraternity mixers, Luigi had an epiphany. Why dismantle the system through code when you can take a more... direct approach?

Armed with a "ghost gun" (because traditional firearms are so passé), Mangione allegedly set out to challenge the corporate overlords one CEO at a time. His target? Brian Thompson, a titan in the healthcare industry and embodiment of the capitalist ideal. The execution—both literal and figurative—was as calculated as any boardroom merger: wait, strike, and vanish into the crowd, leaving the NYPD scratching their heads balls.

The “Why” Heard Around the Boardroom

Recovered from Mangione’s belongings was a manifesto—a three-page, handwritten ode to disillusionment with corporate America. Described as a cross between a hacker's diary and a philosophy undergrad’s late-night rant, it painted Mangione not as a criminal, but as a misunderstood artist taking a bold stand against the oppressive machine.

High Tech, Higher Drama

The weapon of choice, a 3D-printed ghost gun, speaks volumes about Mangione’s innovative spirit. Why settle for a store-bought firearm when you can disrupt the weapons industry too? Add a suppressor for flair, and you’ve got a plotline worthy of a Netflix true-crime docuseries.

Ba da ba ba ba, I'm Lovin' It

While savoring the taste of a delicious McRib, a McDonald's employee called the cops and cashed in on the $60,000 reward.

Mangione’s arrest in a Pennsylvania McDonald’s added an ironic twist to his tale. The tech-savvy renegade, betrayed by a sharp-eyed fast-food worker, was caught munching fries while the corporate machine closed in. Was this a metaphor? A symbolic last meal in the shadow of golden arches, the ultimate icon of capitalism?

Legacy of Lunacy

Now awaiting trial, Mangione’s story is less a cautionary tale and more a bizarre chapter in the annals of corporate drama. Is he a martyr for the disenchanted masses or just another cog in the machine, destined to be forgotten once the next scandal hits Wall Street? Only time—and Netflix ratings—will tell. He seemingly was a big Ted Kaczynski fan.

External Links

Luigi Mangione is part of a series on

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Luigi Mangione is part of a series on Are You Ready? [GAME OVERInsert Coin] Go!
Single Player Elite Hall of Fame

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Single Player Amateur Division

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Luigi Mangione
is part of a series on serious business
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[Stop shooting!Pull the trigger]
Luigi Mangione is part of a series on Gun Control
Locus in quo:

Abilene Alleyway Shooting 🔫 Capital Gazette Shooting 🔫 Chris Dorner 🔫 Christchurch mosque attacks 🔫 Colorado Theatre Shooting 🔫 David Long 🔫 Dayton shooting 🔫 El Paso Walmart Shooting 🔫 Elliot Rodger 🔫 Gilroy Garlic Festival Shooting 🔫 Jacksonville Shooting 🔫 Kyle Rittenhouse 🔫 Marjory Stoneman Douglas School Shooting 🔫 Pulse Nightclub Massacre 🔫 Randy Stair 🔫 San Bernardino shooting 🔫 Sandniggers in Paris 🔫 Sandy Hook Elementary Massacre 🔫 Santa Fe High School Shooting 🔫 Shoahdown at the Synagogue of Doom 🔫 Las Vegas shooting 🔫 Texas church shooting 🔫 Umpqua Community College Shooting 🔫 Virginia Beach Shooting 🔫 Washington Navy Yard shooting 🔫 Youtube shooting 🔫

Supporters

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Main ideas:

Assault Rifle 🔫 Gun 🔫 Gun Control 🔫 Murder 🔫 Arson 🔫 Bombs 🔫 Mass Shooting 🔫 School Shooting 🔫

Haters gonna hate:

Daisy Hogg 🔫 Killers 🔫 Republicans

Acts of revenge:

Boston Marathon Bombing 🔫 Sandniggers in Paris 🔫 Ariana Grande Massacre 🔫 London Bridge Attack 2017 🔫 Capital Gazette Shooting

Objectors:

Charlton Heston 🔫 James Holmes 🔫 NRA 🔫 Osama Bin Laden 🔫 Republicans 🔫 People planning a massacre 🔫

Pre-2012 Gun Massacres

Columbine 🔫 École Polytechnique 🔫 Dawson College 🔫 Virginia Tech Massacre 🔫 Austin, Texas 🔫 NIU Valentine's Day Massacre 🔫 Hungerford Massacre 🔫 Anders Breivik

Luigi Mangione is part of a series on
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Consoles

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Games & Characters

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