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Kongsberg Bow and Arrow Rampage: Difference between revisions
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{{quote|Hello. I’m a messenger. I come with a warning. Is this really what you want? And for all who want to make up for themselves, so it’s time. Bear witness that I am a Muslim...|Espen Andersen Bråthen, prophet of Allah}} | |||
{{ib|[[File:1Espen Andersen Brathen.jpg|125px]]}} | {{ib|[[File:1Espen Andersen Brathen.jpg|125px]]}} | ||
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{{Ibrow|'''[[High Score]]'''|5 killed, 3 injured}} | {{Ibrow|'''[[High Score]]'''|5 killed, 3 injured}} | ||
{{Ibrow|'''Top 50?'''|Nee}} | {{Ibrow|'''Top 50?'''|Nee}} | ||
{{Ibrow|'''Style'''|FPS, Single player}} | {{Ibrow|'''Style'''|FPS/Hack'N'Slash mixture, Single player}} | ||
{{Ibrow|'''[[An Hero]]?'''|Nei}} | {{Ibrow|'''[[An Hero]]?'''|Nei}} | ||
{{Ibend}} | {{Ibend}} | ||
{{ | '''Espen Andersen Bråthen''' is some {{age|1983|10|18}}-year old fjord nigger from [[Denmark]] went who [[postal]] in a small town near Oslo, [[Norway]] on October 13, [[2021]]. He decided [[guns]] were overrated and instead of using them like your average [[loser|”rampage” killer]], this fucking [[goy]] played the CS:Kongsberg map on high difficult by using a superior Norse engineered bow and arrow to rack up the points. Realizing that arrows can't quite penetrate pigs' thick layers of donut grease, he gave up and went for good old fashioned knife-sponsored hack'n'slash. He even managed to get a higher KDA than your average wannabe spree killer like [[Philip Manshaus]], [[Nasim Aghdam]], [[Stephan Balliet]] and of course, the couch cuck himself, [[William Atchison]], so yeah, he does deserves some credit :D. | ||
== Background == | |||
[[File:Brathensnuten.png|thumb|Confronted by the cops in 2020, for breaking into his parents crib and threatening to kill them]] | |||
Bråthen was known to be rebellious in his youth, smoking [[weed|weedzes]] and breaking into the homes of retards, but he converted to [[Islam]] in [[2015]] like every other faggot who feels guilty for gay shit they did in their past. Espen Bråthen was [[BTFO]]d by his parents a few months prior to the attack for being a crazy fuck and had been under the watchful eye of [[Government|Big Brother]] since he converted to Islam because everyone knows that [[truth|ALL MUSLIMS become terrorists]]. | |||
In 2017, one of Espen’s friends reported him to the police after he had postedd 2 videos online saying he was Muslim and “came with a warning”. In 2018, police notified health services about him, but they determined that he was [[facepalm|unlikely to commit a terrorist attack]], because of course they did, fucking retards. | |||
== Attack == | |||
Inspired by the words of Allah, Bråthen spread the hadith throughout Norway and showed them the ways of the [[Islam|religion of peace]] by [[Call of Duty|420 no-scoping]] [[noob]] [[infidel]]s [[Skyrim]] style. He broke into the homes of frail [[old people]] and | Inspired by the words of Allah, Bråthen spread the hadith throughout Norway and showed them the ways of the [[Islam|religion of peace]] by [[Call of Duty|420 no-scoping]] [[noob]] [[infidel]]s [[Skyrim]] style. He broke into the homes of frail [[old people]] and stabbed them to death with a kitchen knife. One of the noobs that got pwned was a somewhat renowned [[metal]] singer named [[who?|Andrea Meyer Haugen]]. | ||
One of the noobs that got pwned was a somewhat renowned [[metal]] singer named Andrea Meyer Haugen. | |||
<s>If convicted, Bråthen will be placed in a 5-star Norwegian [[prison]] retreat for a decade long vacation.</s> <b>He ended up apologizing for his actions in court like a [[bitch]] and was [[Win|sentenced to compulsory mental health care.]]</b> | |||
[[File:kongsberg gameplay.jpg|thumb|Leaked gameplay footage of the attack.]] | [[File:kongsberg gameplay.jpg|thumb|Leaked gameplay footage of the attack.]] | ||
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{{videoframe|Vidyas|background-color: #FFFFFF;|font-weight: bold; | {{videoframe|Vidyas|background-color: #FFFFFF;|font-weight: bold; | ||
|[[File:EspenAttack.mp4|500px]] | |||
|[[File:EspenAttackpt2.mp4|500px]] | |||
|[[File:KongsbergVideo.mp4|500px]] | |[[File:KongsbergVideo.mp4|500px]] | ||
|[[File:EspenBrathenNor.mp4|500px]] | |||
}} | }} | ||
{{clear}} | {{clear}} | ||
==Graded Score== | ==Graded Score== | ||
{{GradedScore|5|5 dead, 3 injured|18| Shot an off duty police officer in the ass, best part of the human body but should’ve went for the rack itself. |'''25'''|The bow and arrow adds much needed variety to the already saturated mass-shooting genre.|20|Has people arguing for both deregulation of gun control altogether and for the banning of bow and arrows.|20|Failed to convert anyone to Islam but spread [[Lulz]] across [[Scandinavia]]|88|B| You still will never be Anders.}} | {{GradedScore|5|5 dead, 3 injured|18| Shot an off duty police officer in the ass, best part of the human body but should’ve went for the rack itself. |'''25'''|The bow and arrow adds much needed variety to the already saturated mass-shooting genre.|20|Has people arguing for both deregulation of gun control altogether and for the banning of bow and arrows.|20|Failed to convert anyone to Islam but spread [[Lulz]] across [[Scandinavia]]|88|B| You still will never be Anders.}} | ||
| Line 42: | Line 53: | ||
<gallery> | <gallery> | ||
File:Espenbrathencoop.jpg|At the start of his rampage | File:Espenbrathencoop.jpg|At the start of his rampage | ||
File:EspenVictimCop.png | |||
File:Brathenv&.jpg|Espen being [[v&]] | |||
File:EspenKniv1.png|One of his four knives | |||
File:EspenKniv2.png | |||
File:EspenKniv3.png | |||
File:EspenKniv4.png | |||
File:Ungbrathen.jpg|In his younger days | File:Ungbrathen.jpg|In his younger days | ||
File:Andrea Haugen.jpg|Andrea Haugen, the fallen metal singer | File:Andrea Haugen.jpg|Andrea Haugen, the fallen metal singer | ||
</gallery> | </gallery> | ||
==External Links== | ==External Links== | ||
*{{wayback|https://www.gulesider.no/espen+br%C3%A5then+kongsberg/78287990/person|title=Dox}} | |||
==See Also== | ==See Also== | ||
Latest revision as of 23:10, 22 August 2024
|
of the Prophet (ﷺ)? We are here to help! Please click here! |
—Espen Andersen Bråthen, prophet of Allah | ||
| |
|---|---|
| Espen Andersen Bråthen | |
| Born | October 18, 1983 |
| Nationality | Danish 
|
| High Score | 5 killed, 3 injured |
| Top 50? | Nee |
| Style | FPS/Hack'N'Slash mixture, Single player |
| An Hero? | Nei |
Espen Andersen Bråthen is some 41-year old fjord nigger from Denmark went who postal in a small town near Oslo, Norway on October 13, 2021. He decided guns were overrated and instead of using them like your average ”rampage” killer, this fucking goy played the CS:Kongsberg map on high difficult by using a superior Norse engineered bow and arrow to rack up the points. Realizing that arrows can't quite penetrate pigs' thick layers of donut grease, he gave up and went for good old fashioned knife-sponsored hack'n'slash. He even managed to get a higher KDA than your average wannabe spree killer like Philip Manshaus, Nasim Aghdam, Stephan Balliet and of course, the couch cuck himself, William Atchison, so yeah, he does deserves some credit :D.
Background
Bråthen was known to be rebellious in his youth, smoking weedzes and breaking into the homes of retards, but he converted to Islam in 2015 like every other faggot who feels guilty for gay shit they did in their past. Espen Bråthen was BTFOd by his parents a few months prior to the attack for being a crazy fuck and had been under the watchful eye of Big Brother since he converted to Islam because everyone knows that ALL MUSLIMS become terrorists.
In 2017, one of Espen’s friends reported him to the police after he had postedd 2 videos online saying he was Muslim and “came with a warning”. In 2018, police notified health services about him, but they determined that he was unlikely to commit a terrorist attack, because of course they did, fucking retards.
Attack
Inspired by the words of Allah, Bråthen spread the hadith throughout Norway and showed them the ways of the religion of peace by 420 no-scoping noob infidels Skyrim style. He broke into the homes of frail old people and stabbed them to death with a kitchen knife. One of the noobs that got pwned was a somewhat renowned metal singer named Andrea Meyer Haugen.
If convicted, Bråthen will be placed in a 5-star Norwegian prison retreat for a decade long vacation. He ended up apologizing for his actions in court like a bitch and was sentenced to compulsory mental health care.
Videos
Previous Video | Next Video
Graded Score
| Kill count: | 5/20 5 dead, 3 injured |
|---|---|
| Accuracy: | 18/20 Shot an off duty police officer in the ass, best part of the human body but should’ve went for the rack itself. |
| Style: | 25/20 The bow and arrow adds much needed variety to the already saturated mass-shooting genre. |
| Butthurt: | 20/20 Has people arguing for both deregulation of gun control altogether and for the banning of bow and arrows. |
| Bonus: | 20/20 Failed to convert anyone to Islam but spread Lulz across Scandinavia |
Wanted Level:
___________________
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___________________
|
Gallery
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At the start of his rampage -
-
Espen being v& -
One of his four knives -
-
-
-
In his younger days -
Andrea Haugen, the fallen metal singer
External Links
See Also
- Anders Behring Breivik - The superior Aryan cultural Marxist that achieved the high score of 77
- Pulse Nightclub Massacre - Muslim who struck down practicioners of sodomy in the name of Islam (He was totally not gay himself!!)
- San Bernardino Shooting - A lovely Muslim couple that spread the love of Allah to bystanders in California
- Terrorism - A severe case of whitey committing cultural appropriation of sand nigger culture
