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Mikhail Pivnev: Difference between revisions

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{{MissingImages}}
{{AlGore}}
{{ib|[[File:Mikhail Pivnev.jpg|250px]]}}
{{ib|[[File:Mikhail Pivnev.jpg|250px]]}}
{{Ibhead|<big>'''Mikhail Pivnev'''</big>}}
{{Ibhead|<big>'''Mikhail Pivnev'''</big>}}
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==Background==
==Background==
Mikhail was born in 2002 in the artic shithole that is Russia. Growing up, [[Lie|he wuz a gud boy]], until he started to [[Bullying|started to get picked on by the jocks at school]]. This constant [[shitting]] on the little fuck escalated to one time, an incident in [[2014]] where a group of the lowlifes [[Rape|humiliated]] him in front of his peers and [[BAWWWWW|took his shoes from him]]. He apparently bitch and moaned about this to his [[Slut|mother]] about the incident, but she [[Truth|gave zero fucks and told him the incident was his fault]]. After this incident, Mikhail believed it was the beginning of the end for him and decided he would get [[School shooting|revenge]] on the fucks who [[Assrape|assraped]] him for [[Great justice|great justice]] and [[lulz]]. In the months leading up to [[IRL Trolling|NBK]] he became fascinated by [[Hitler|Hitluh and teh naz1s]] and [[edgy]] [[shit]] like [[Columbine]]. Infact our boy Mikey was so dedicated to '''Reb''' and '''VoDKa''' he turned his [[Vk]] page into a literal shrine. He would also [[Dumbass|threaten pull amok several times to his classmates]], which in return would prompt them to [[Snitch|report the threats to the principal]], but thankfully, the principal [[LOL|didn't believe them]]. He had also threatened to commit his attack on [[9/11]] because of [[lulz]], but ultimately didn't.
Mikhail was born in 2002 in the artic shithole that is Russia. Growing up, [[Lie|he wuz a gud boy]], until he started to [[Bullying|started to get picked on by the jocks at school]]. This constant [[shitting]] on the little fuck escalated to one time, an incident in [[2014]] where a group of the lowlifes [[Rape|humiliated]] him in front of his peers and [[BAWWWWW|took his shoes from him]]. He apparently bitch and moaned about this to his [[Slut|mother]] about the incident, but she [[Truth|gave zero fucks and told him the incident was his fault]]. After this incident, Mikhail believed it was the beginning of the end for him and decided he would get [[School shooting|revenge]] on the fucks who [[Assrape|assraped]] him for [[Great justice|great justice]] and [[lulz]]. In the months leading up to [[IRL Trolling|NBK]] he became fascinated by [[Hitler|Hitluh and teh naz1s]] and [[edgy]] [[shit]] like [[Columbine]]. Infact our boy Mikey was so dedicated to '''Reb''' and '''VoDKa''' he turned his [[Vk]] page into a literal shrine. He would also [[Dumbass|threaten pull amok several times to his classmates]], which in return would prompt them to [[Snitch|report the threats to the principal]], but thankfully, the principal [[LOL|didn't believe them]]. He had also threatened to commit his attack on [[9/11]] because of [[lulz]], but ultimately didn't.
 
[[File:MikhailFaggot.jpg|thumb|left|[[Faggot|Ill suck your dick honey]]]]
==Loadout==
==Loadout==
<div align="center">
<div align="center">
{|class="wikitable" width="40%"
{|class="wikitable" width="40%"
!colspan="2"|Class Setup
!colspan="2"|Class Setup
|-<!-- DONGS NIGGA-->
|-<!--FAGGOT-->
!Item
!Item
!Accessories/Bonus
!Accessories/Bonus
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|
|
*Double damage against Jews, [[Irony|Slavs]], and non-whites.
*Double damage against Jews, [[Irony|Slavs]], and non-whites.
 
|-
|
*'''Perk''': Columbiner
<center>[[Image:Outcasts.jpg|50px]]</center>
|
*Double damage against kids and adults, triple if they are in an academic institution. Intelligence stat cut in half.
|}
|}
</div>
</div>
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==Gallery==
==Gallery==
{{center|<gallery perrow="5" caption="Gallery of Failure">
{{center|<gallery perrow="5" caption="Gallery of Failure">
File:Pivnevtrenchcoat.jpg|[[Robert Hawkins|Robbie Hawkins if he was a Columbiner]]
File:Mikhailmatrix.jpg|Russian Neo
File:Pivnevwithakjpg.jpeg|Too bad that ak isn't real.
File:MikhailHitler.jpg|Looks like Pivnev is [[butthurt|suffering]] beacause of his fail.
File:Pivnevfingergun.jpg
File:Mikhailbeforeshooting.jpeg|Mikhail, minutes before the russia's worst failure.
File:Ruskiewithashotgun.jpg|Eric Harris wannabe
File:Mikhailvk.jpg
File:D0A41-62.png
File:Mikhailchillern.jpg
File:05134914.png|Russian Neo
File:MkhailPivnevColumbiner.jpeg
File:Pivnevzoomer.jpeg|Pivnev was a [[asshole|zoomer]]
File:MikhailPivnevForest.jpeg
</gallery>}}
</gallery>}}


==Graded Score==
==Graded Score==
{| style="{{roundy|18px}}{{gradlinear|red|orange}}box-shadow:0 3px 6px gray;padding:1em;margin:0 auto 1em auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="2" border="0"
{{GradedScore|0|Fuck you|1|Idiot couldn't aim or kill for shit.|5|First Russian Columbine copycat|3|Nobody cares.|0|None.|9|F-|How about acquire ACTUAL weapons next time. Oh, and don't be a pussy with them.}}
|-
! colspan="2" style="{{roundy|9px}}background-color:red;box-shadow:0 3px 6px orange;" | <big>Graded score</big>
|-
| colspan="2" style="height:9px;overflow:hidden;" |
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Kill count:
|[[Epic fail|0]]/20
|-
! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" | Accuracy:
|1/20 ''Idiot couldn't aim or kill for shit.''
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Style:
|5/20 ''First Russian Columbine copycat''
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Butthurt:
|3/20 ''Nobody cares.''
|-
! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" | Bonus:
|0/20 None.  
|-
! colspan="2" style="{{roundy|9px}}background-color:orange;box-shadow:0 3px 6px yellow;" | <big>Total score: 9/100 ('''F-''')</big>
|}


<center>'''How about acquire ACTUAL weapons next time. Oh, and don't be a pussy with them.'''</center>
{{WantedLevel|level=custom|customstars=[[File:Quarter-Star.png|40px]]|custompic=[[File:Kindergarten Crossing Guard.jpg|128px]]|customdesc=Kindergarten Crossing Guard}}
<center>'''[[High Score| See full ranking]]'''</center>


==See Also==
==See Also==
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*[[Nazi]] - What he was.
*[[Nazi]] - What he was.


{{Template:High Scores}}
{{Template:Columbine}}
{{Template:Columbine}}
{{Template:Nazis}}
{{Template:Nazis}}
[[Category:Rusfags]]

Latest revision as of 19:19, 3 November 2024

Mikhail Pivnev is yet another mediocre mass shooting article. You can help by not writing articles on every boring edgelord that goes postal and reminding the author they aren't AlGore.
Mikhail Pivnev
Nationality: Ruskie  
Highscore injured 1
Top 25? Lmao fuck no.
Style Single player
An Hero? No, pussied out

Mikhail Pivnev or Mikhail Klebold is an unoriginal zoomer nerd from Putinstan who on September 5th 2017 at the ripe age of 15 attempted to bring the legacy of IRL trollers Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold to the khanate but ended up becoming Russia's version of Sebastian Bosse.

Background

Mikhail was born in 2002 in the artic shithole that is Russia. Growing up, he wuz a gud boy, until he started to started to get picked on by the jocks at school. This constant shitting on the little fuck escalated to one time, an incident in 2014 where a group of the lowlifes humiliated him in front of his peers and took his shoes from him. He apparently bitch and moaned about this to his mother about the incident, but she gave zero fucks and told him the incident was his fault. After this incident, Mikhail believed it was the beginning of the end for him and decided he would get revenge on the fucks who assraped him for great justice and lulz. In the months leading up to NBK he became fascinated by Hitluh and teh naz1s and edgy shit like Columbine. Infact our boy Mikey was so dedicated to Reb and VoDKa he turned his Vk page into a literal shrine. He would also threaten pull amok several times to his classmates, which in return would prompt them to report the threats to the principal, but thankfully, the principal didn't believe them. He had also threatened to commit his attack on 9/11 because of lulz, but ultimately didn't.

Ill suck your dick honey

Loadout

Class Setup
Item Accessories/Bonus
  • Pellet gun mommy and daddy gave to him as a gift. Literally won't kill ANYTHING. Does 1 pt. of damage
  • Melee: Axe
  • Generic Axe. Does 5-15 pts of damage
  • Throwables: Homemade smoke bombs
  • Meant to be used for concealment and to cause coughing. Does 0 pts of damage
  • Perk: Nazism
  • Double damage against Jews, Slavs, and non-whites.
  • Perk: Columbiner
  • Double damage against kids and adults, triple if they are in an academic institution. Intelligence stat cut in half.

Attack

On 9/5/17 our hero arrives late like his heroes Reb and VoDKa did before their attack strolling into the school wearing a trench coat and combat boots and heading for his class. Upon entering the classroom his 39 year old female teacher demands an explanation, but instead our hero proclaims he came to die and shoots his teacher with his shitty "gun" and strikes her in the head with the axe, but the faggot doesn't even bother to continue to strike her some more to drain her health bar to zero, probably assuming she's dead already. He then continues to shoot his pellet gun in random places but not attempting to shoot at anyone else and throwing smoke bombs like an aspie in a FPS TDM just spamming flash bombs around the map. 3 students escaped the classroom by attempting an hero (AKA jumping out the window) but sustained injures. Eventually our pathetic excuse of a hero is arrested and later cries like a bitch saying how sorry he is.

Aftermath

In Feburary 2019 Mikhail Pissnev was sentenced to dea---7 years in jail after expressing deep trolls remorse and is most likely getting buttsecks by older men in the gulag shower rooms as of right now. He is probably also undergoing de-radicalization due to his "NATZEE!!1" beliefs and his probably getting cucked by normie psychiatrists that "Eric and Dylan were not ruskee enough!1" and is to give up his Columbine hentai and furry porn

Videos

Mikey reenacting his "massacre"

Gallery

Graded Score

Graded Score
Kill count: 0/20 Fuck you
Accuracy: 1/20 Idiot couldn't aim or kill for shit.
Style: 5/20 First Russian Columbine copycat
Butthurt: 3/20 Nobody cares.
Bonus: 0/20 None.
Total Score: 9/100 (F-)
How about acquire ACTUAL weapons next time. Oh, and don't be a pussy with them.
See full ranking


Wanted Level:

Kindergarten Crossing Guard


See Also


Mikhail Pivnev is part of a series on Are You Ready? [GAME OVERInsert Coin] Go!
Single Player Elite Hall of Fame

Adam LanzaAnders Behring BreivikAndrew KehoeAriana Grande MassacreBaruch GoldsteinBrenton TarrantCampo Elías DelgadoCho Seung-HuiDevin Patrick KelleyDong YanglingGabriel WortmanJack Gilbert GrahamJakrapanth ThommaJames HubertyLuby's massacreMartin BryantMutsuo ToiNice Truck Attack 2016Omar MateenPanya KhamrabPatrick CrusiusReina Nightclub MassacreSalvador RamosShinji AobaStephen PaddockTed BundyVladislav RoslyakovWilliam UnekWoo Bum-kon

Single Player Amateur Division

Aaron AlexisAlexandre BissonnetteAkbarzhon JalivovAli David SonbolyAnderson Lee AldrichAndrea PignaniAnton Lundin PetterssonArtyom KazantsevAudrey HaleBrandon Scott HoleBreda Highschool MassacreBreitscheidplatzBrenda Ann SpencerBruce Jeffrey PardoCapital Gazette ShootingCharles Whitman's TumorChris Harper-MercerConnor BettsDallas Police ShootingsDarrell BrooksDavid KatzDavid KozákDavid Malcolm GrayDeath to Traitors, Freedom for BritainDerrick BirdDeWayne CraddockDimitrios PagourtzisDimitrious GargasoulasDmitry VinogradovDylann Storm RoofElliot RodgerÉric BorelEuler Fernando GrandolphoFlemming NielsenFort HoodGabe ParkerGeorge SodiniGian Luigi FerriIan David LongIlnaz GalyavievJake DavisonJames Alex FieldsJames HolmesJared Lee LoughnerJason DaltonJason RodriguezJaylen FrybergJeffrey DahmerJeff WeiseJesse OsborneJiverly VoongJoe StackJohn Russel HouserJohn Wilkes BoothJonathan SapirmanJosef FritzlKhalid MasoodKimveer GillKip KinkelKongsberg Bow and Arrow RampageLam Kor WanMamoru TakumaMarc LépineMark BartonMark EssexMartin PeyerlMatthew de GroodMichael CarnealMichael Kenneth McLendonMichael RyanMikese MorseMr. SaariNathan GaleNghtmrchld26Nikolas CruzNoah EsbensenOrlando HarrisOtoya YamaguchiPatrick PurdyPayton GendronPekka-Eric AuvinenPetri GerdtRamadan Van ManRandy Robert StairRichard SpeckRobert BalesRobert BowersRobert CardRobert CrimoRobert HawkinsRobert LongRobert SteinhäuserRuslan AkhtyamovRyan PalmeterSantino William LeganSatoshi UematsuSayfullo SaipovStephen KazmierczakThe Twinkie ManThomas Matthew CrooksThomas Watt HamiltonTim KretschmerTimothy HendronTimur BekmansurovTJ LaneTobias RathjenTrystan Andrew TerrellTyler PetersonUnabomberWade Michael PageWalter SeifertWellington Menezes de OliveiraZhao ZeweiZug Massacre

Multiplayer Co-Op Mode

1-14 Jakarta AttacksAcademy ManiacsBoston Marathon BombingCharlie HebdoColumbineCrocus City Hall MassacreHiroshima and NagasakiISIS Paris Attack 13-11Jews did WTCLondon Bridge Attack 2017Medianeira School ShootingPearl HarborSan Bernardino ShootingSri Lanka 2019 Terrorist AttacksSuzano School ShootingTimothy McVeighZhaodong Massacre

Civilization and Great Prophets

Adolf HitlerAugusto PinochetCharles MansonHeaven's GateHolocaustJonestownJoseph StalinKim Il-sungMao ZedongOsama bin LadenPol PotSaddam HusseinWacoWorld War II

Banned From Scoring

Alex HribalAnthony WarnerAnton BichivinAsa CoonBen MoynihanBilly MitchellBrandon CleggBrian Isaack ClydeCharles BishopClay DukeDillon CosseyFaisal ShahzadFrank JamesHayden JagstHugo JacksonIlya IvanistovJohn EarnestKyle RittenhouseLaaiti EkenstéenLindsay Kantha SouvannarathLogan ClarkMAGABomberMikhail PivnevNasim AghdamNicky ReillyPhilip ManshausRichard ReidRyan RouthSam HydeSebastian BosseSol PaisStephan BallietTodd RogersWillem Van SpronsenWilliam AtchisonYou

 
Mikhail Pivnev is part of a series on Columbine
[All jocks stand up!NBK]
Columbine:

ColumbineEric Harris and Dylan KleboldSuper Columbine Massacre RPGDo you believe in godColumbine CopycatsColumbine GalleryColumbiners

Admirers

Adam LanzaAlex HribalArtyom KazantsevAsa CoonBob8466Brooke Higgins & Sienna JohnsonCho Seung-HuiDillon CosseyIchverbotJaylen FrybergJeff WeiseKimveer GillLindsay Kantha SouvannarathLynn AnnNeocitiesNghtmrchld26Pekka-Eric AuvinenRobert Butler Jr.Robert HawkinsRobert SteinhäuserRyan SchallenbergerSebastian BosseSol PaisTheAmazingAtheistTim KretschmerVladislav RoslyakovWilliam AtchisonYou

Locations:

ColoradoUnited StatesSchoolSuburbs

Related:

DoomPolice BrutalityPostalSchool ShootingMass ShootingVideo gamesTrenchcoatMarilyn MansonKMFDMRammsteinGothConcerned MotherNewgroundsRyan LambournSchool Shooter: North American Tour 2012The MatrixSouth ParkMichael MooreQuentin Tarantino1990sJack ThompsonGun control

Mikhail Pivnev is part of a series on National Socialists
Click topics to expand

Sieg Heil!

SchutzstaffelIdeologie, Tradition, Praxis, und StolzMöchtegern-NazisFeinde, Verräter, und verboten