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Sagamihara Stabbings: Difference between revisions

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Just 3 days after the [[Munich Massacre]] that killed 10, [[Japan]] has one-upped [[Germany|Deutschland]] by scoring twice as many frags in their own attempt at the high score - all while using just a knife. This impressive score for a knife-only round was pulled off by '''Satoshi Uematsu''', a 26 year old man, and a former employee of the disabled care home that was targeted. His motivation is reported to be an attempt to clear out the genepool by removing [[Retards]] and the [[Disabled]] from the world. This massacre has shocked Japan, but will likely be ignored by the rest of the world, as [[Postal|rampage]] [[Mass Murder|killings]] are a daily occurrence now.
{{ib|[[File:Satoshi.png|200px]]}}
{{ib|[[File:Satoshi.png|200px]]}}
{{Ibhead|<big>'''Satoshi Uematsu'''</big>}}
{{Ibhead|<big>'''Satoshi Uematsu'''</big>}}
{{Ibrow|'''Nationality:'''|[[Japan]]&nbsp;&nbsp;[[File:MiniflagJapan.png]]}}
{{Ibrow|'''Born'''|January 20, 1990 ({{age|1990|1|20}} years old)}}
{{Ibrow|'''Nationality:'''|[[Japan|Nihonjin]]&nbsp;&nbsp;[[File:MiniflagJapan.png]]}}
{{Ibrow|'''Occupation'''|Philanthropist}}
{{Ibrow|'''[[high score|Highscore]]'''|Killed 19, injured 26}}
{{Ibrow|'''[[high score|Highscore]]'''|Killed 19, injured 26}}
{{Ibrow|'''Top 50?'''|[[High Score|5]]}}
{{Ibrow|'''Top 50?'''|[[High Score|10th]] (Japan: 2nd!!!)}}
{{Ibrow|'''Style'''|Hack'N'Slash}}
{{Ibrow|'''Style'''|Hack'N'Slash}}
{{Ibrow|'''[[An Hero]]?'''|No}}
{{Ibrow|'''[[An Hero]]?'''|No ([[Culture|turned himself in]])}}
{{Ibend}}
{{Ibend}}
Just 3 days after the [[Munich Massacre]] that killed 10 [[Turkey|turkroaches]], [[Japan]] one-upped [[Germany|Deutschland]] by scoring twice as many frags in their own attempt at the [[high score]]—all while using just a knife. This impressive score for a knife-only round was pulled off by '''Satoshi Uematsu'''{{nazi}} (Japanese: 国民的英雄), a {{age|1990|1|20}}-year-old professional eugenicist and former nurse at the Tsukui Yamayuri En care home (the location of the attack). Satoshi admitted that he wished to purify the genepool by removing [[Retards]] and the [[Disabled]], as well as '''{{archive|7xYZM|to prevent World War III lol}}'''.
The massacre shocked Japan but was forgotten by the rest of the world after 1 week as [[Postal|rampage]] [[Mass Murder|killings]] are a daily occurrence now.


==Graded Score==
==Graded Score==


{| style="{{roundy|18px}}{{gradlinear|red|orange}}box-shadow:0 3px 6px gray;padding:1em;margin:0 auto 1em auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="2" border="0"
{{GradedScore|19|Almost there!|8|Killed 19, injured 26. Not bad considering the weapon.|18|Murdered retards in their sleep.|20|Feels no remorse, many lulz.|20|Doing [[God]]'s work.|85|B+|Master Eugenicist; Japan's Angel of Death. [[Darwin]] would be proud.}}
|-
! colspan="2" style="{{roundy|9px}}background-color:red;box-shadow:0 3px 6px orange;" | <big>Graded score</big>
|-
| colspan="2" style="height:9px;overflow:hidden;" |
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Kill count:
|19/20
|-
! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" | Accuracy:
|8/20 ''Killed 19, injured 26''
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Style:
|18/20 ''Killed them in their sleep''
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Butthurt:
|20/20 ''Feels no remorse, many lulz''
|-
! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" | Bonus:
|20/20 ''Did what was [[Murder|right]]''
|-
! colspan="2" style="{{roundy|9px}}background-color:orange;box-shadow:0 3px 6px yellow;" | <big>Total score: 85/100 ('''B''')</big>
|}
 
<center>'''Master Eugenicist'''</center>
<center>'''[[High Score| See full ranking]]'''</center>


{{Wanted|2}}
{{Wanted|2}}
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==See Also==
==See Also==
*[[Japan]]
*[[Japan]]
*[[Mamoru Takuma]]
*[[Murder]]
*[[Murder]]
*[[Retards]]
*[[Retards]]
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{{High Scores}}
{{Japan}}
{{Psychopaths}}
{{Psychopaths}}
{{Japan}}
{{High Scores}}
[[Category:2016]]
[[Category:2016]]

Latest revision as of 01:11, 2 November 2024

Satoshi Uematsu
Born January 20, 1990 (34 years old)
Nationality: Nihonjin  
Occupation Philanthropist
Highscore Killed 19, injured 26
Top 50? 10th (Japan: 2nd!!!)
Style Hack'N'Slash
An Hero? No (turned himself in)

Just 3 days after the Munich Massacre that killed 10 turkroaches, Japan one-upped Deutschland by scoring twice as many frags in their own attempt at the high score—all while using just a knife. This impressive score for a knife-only round was pulled off by Satoshi Uematsu卐 (Japanese: 国民的英雄), a 34-year-old professional eugenicist and former nurse at the Tsukui Yamayuri En care home (the location of the attack). Satoshi admitted that he wished to purify the genepool by removing Retards and the Disabled, as well as to prevent World War III lol.

The massacre shocked Japan but was forgotten by the rest of the world after 1 week as rampage killings are a daily occurrence now.

Graded Score

Graded Score
Kill count: 19/20 Almost there!
Accuracy: 8/20 Killed 19, injured 26. Not bad considering the weapon.
Style: 18/20 Murdered retards in their sleep.
Butthurt: 20/20 Feels no remorse, many lulz.
Bonus: 20/20 Doing God's work.
Total Score: 85/100 (B+)
Master Eugenicist; Japan's Angel of Death. Darwin would be proud.
See full ranking


Wanted Level:

Police Force


Round 2

A few months after this attack, a Chinese man named Yang Qingpei proceeded to carry out a stabbing rampage. He scored 19 frags like Satoshi did, but left no survivors in the process. He killed Mom and Dad over some bullshit argument, yet had the great idea that he needed to kill 17 other people in order to cover up his crime. He was playing Hitman IRL and was too much of a clutz to use proper stealth, giving him the ranking of Mass Murderer. He will not be unlocking a silenced M4A41-s for this.


See Also


External Links



 Sagamihara Stabbings is part of a series on Are You Ready? [GAME OVERInsert Coin] Go!
Single Player Elite Hall of Fame

Adam Lanza • Anders Behring Breivik • Andrew Kehoe • Ariana Grande Massacre • Baruch Goldstein • Brenton Tarrant • Campo Elías Delgado • Cho Seung-Hui • Devin Patrick Kelley • Dong Yangling • Gabriel Wortman • Jack Gilbert Graham • Jakrapanth Thomma • James Huberty • Luby's massacre • Martin Bryant • Mutsuo Toi • Nice Truck Attack 2016 • Omar Mateen • Panya Khamrab • Patrick Crusius • Reina Nightclub Massacre • Salvador Ramos • Shinji Aoba • Stephen Paddock • Ted Bundy • Vladislav Roslyakov • William Unek • Woo Bum-kon

Single Player Amateur Division

Aaron Alexis • Alexandre Bissonnette • Akbarzhon Jalivov • Ali David Sonboly • Anderson Lee Aldrich • Andrea Pignani • Anton Lundin Pettersson • Artyom Kazantsev • Audrey Hale • Brandon Scott Hole • Breda Highschool Massacre • Breitscheidplatz • Brenda Ann Spencer • Bruce Jeffrey Pardo • Capital Gazette Shooting • Charles Whitman's Tumor • Chris Harper-Mercer • Connor Betts • Dallas Police Shootings • Darrell Brooks • David Katz • David Kozák • David Malcolm Gray • Death to Traitors, Freedom for Britain • Derrick Bird • DeWayne Craddock • Dimitrios Pagourtzis • Dimitrious Gargasoulas • Dmitry Vinogradov • Dylann Storm Roof • Elliot Rodger • Éric Borel • Euler Fernando Grandolpho • Flemming Nielsen • Fort Hood • Gabe Parker • George Sodini • Gian Luigi Ferri • Ian David Long • Ilnaz Galyaviev • Jake Davison • James Alex Fields • James Holmes • Jared Lee Loughner • Jason Dalton • Jason Rodriguez • Jaylen Fryberg • Jeffrey Dahmer • Jeff Weise • Jesse Osborne • Jiverly Voong • Joe Stack • John Russel Houser • John Wilkes Booth • Jonathan Sapirman • Josef Fritzl • Khalid Masood • Kimveer Gill • Kip Kinkel • Kongsberg Bow and Arrow Rampage • Lam Kor Wan • Mamoru Takuma • Marc Lépine • Mark Barton • Mark Essex • Martin Peyerl • Matthew de Grood • Michael Carneal • Michael Kenneth McLendon • Michael Ryan • Mikese Morse • Mr. Saari • Nathan Gale • Nghtmrchld26 • Nikolas Cruz • Noah Esbensen • Orlando Harris • Otoya Yamaguchi • Patrick Purdy • Payton Gendron • Pekka-Eric Auvinen • Petri Gerdt • Ramadan Van Man • Randy Robert Stair • Richard Speck • Robert Bales • Robert Bowers • Robert Card • Robert Crimo • Robert Hawkins • Robert Long • Robert Steinhäuser • Ruslan Akhtyamov • Ryan Palmeter • Santino William Legan • Satoshi Uematsu • Sayfullo Saipov • Stephen Kazmierczak • The Twinkie Man • Thomas Matthew Crooks • Thomas Watt Hamilton • Tim Kretschmer • Timothy Hendron • Timur Bekmansurov • TJ Lane • Tobias Rathjen • Trystan Andrew Terrell • Tyler Peterson • Unabomber • Wade Michael Page • Walter Seifert • Wellington Menezes de Oliveira • Zhao Zewei • Zug Massacre

Multiplayer Co-Op Mode

1-14 Jakarta Attacks • Academy Maniacs • Boston Marathon Bombing • Charlie Hebdo • Columbine • Crocus City Hall Massacre • Hiroshima and Nagasaki • ISIS Paris Attack 13-11 • Jews did WTC • London Bridge Attack 2017 • Medianeira School Shooting • Pearl Harbor • San Bernardino Shooting • Sri Lanka 2019 Terrorist Attacks • Suzano School Shooting • Timothy McVeigh • Zhaodong Massacre

Civilization and Great Prophets

Adolf Hitler • Augusto Pinochet • Charles Manson • Heaven's Gate • Holocaust • Jonestown • Joseph Stalin • Kim Il-sung • Mao Zedong • Osama bin Laden • Pol Pot • Saddam Hussein • Waco • World War II

Banned From Scoring

Alex Hribal • Anthony Warner • Anton Bichivin • Asa Coon • Ben Moynihan • Billy Mitchell • Brandon Clegg • Brian Isaack Clyde • Charles Bishop • Clay Duke • Dillon Cossey • Faisal Shahzad • Frank James • Hayden Jagst • Hugo Jackson • Ilya Ivanistov • John Earnest • Kyle Rittenhouse • Laaiti Ekenstéen • Lindsay Kantha Souvannarath • Logan Clark • MAGABomber • Mikhail Pivnev • Nasim Aghdam • Nicky Reilly • Philip Manshaus • Richard Reid • Ryan Routh • Sam Hyde • Sebastian Bosse • Sol Pais • Stephan Balliet • Todd Rogers • Willem Van Spronsen • William Atchison • You

 

Sagamihara Stabbings is part of a series on 日本国


Typical Japanese people. 日本人
Filthy Frank • Hard Gay • Mutsuo Toi • Otoya Yamaguchi • Satoshi Uematsu

●

Typical Japanese Culture.　日本の人文

2chan • Anime • Animu Archetypes • Big Daikon • Dating sim • Gaiden • Herbivore Men • Japanese Bug Fights • Manga • Shimajiro


Typical Japanese Porn.　日本の猥本
Bukkake • Guro • Harem Comedy • Hentai • Lolicon • Pantyshot • Shotacon • Yaoi • Yuri

Sagamihara Stabbings is part of a series on Psychopaths
[It rubs the lotion on the skin or else it gets the hose againOpen the box]
Spree/One-time Killers:

Aaron Alexis • Adam Lanza • Alex Hribal • Alyssa Bustamante • Anthony Warner • Audrey Hale • Bruce Jeffrey Pardo • Casey Anthony • Cho Seung-Hui • Devin Patrick Kelley • Dylan Klebold • Dylann Storm Roof • Eric Harris • Gerry McCann • James Holmes • Jared Lee Loughner • Jason Rodriguez • Jeff Weise • Jiverly Voong • Joe Stack • Josef Fritzl • Laaiti Ekenstéen • Mark Essex • Martin Bryant • Matthew de Grood • Matthew Murray • Matti Saari • Maurice Clemmons • Pekka-Eric Auvinen • Raoul Moat • Richard Speck • Robert Hawkins • Stephen Paddock • Tim Kretschmer • Timothy Hendron • TJ Lane • Tyler Peterson • Wade Michael Page • Woo Bum-kon

Career/Serial Killers:

Academy Maniacs • Adolf Hitler • Charles Manson • Chris Benoit • Dnepropetrovsk Maniacs • Dubya • Jack the Ripper • Jeffrey Dahmer • Mao Zedong • Richard "The Iceman" Kuklinski • Ted Bundy

Terrorists:

Al Qaeda • Anders Behring Breivik • Anderson Lee Aldrich • Anton Lundin Pettersson • Dzhokhar Tsarnaev • Elliot Rodger • George Sodini • Maniacs Murder Cult • Mark Essex • Nidal Malik Hasan • Osama bin Laden • Tamerlan Tsarnaev • Ted Kaczynski

See also:

Antisocial personality disorder • Jews • Murder • Paranoid personality disorder • Pittsburgh Paint Job • Police Brutality • Sick fuck

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