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Fullerton Triple Homicide

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I'm only killing an animal.
 

 
 

—Frank Felix, realizing what horrors his fandom has wrought upon this world.


Frank Felix and Josh Acosta
Nationality: Americunt  
High score Killed 3
Top 50? No
Style FPS, Co-Op
An Hero? No


In September 2016, a failed crusade occurred in Fullerton, Furfagville, USA. Several of the "people" (used in the loosest sense) involved were active furries, and knew each other through some cancerous bowling and pedophilia cult masquerading as a social group. Although it was slightly more successful than the similar poison gas attack on some midwestern furfags, multiple points have to be deducted as the crusaders were members of the targeted group.

About Our Characters

The suspects are two Americunt big game hunters: 29-year-old Josh Acosta and 33-year-old Frank Felix, known also by their fursonas: "Josh Lennon" and "Entey Felix", respectively. As you have probably figured out, they are also, confusingly, degenerates themselves and seemed to have committed the atrocity out of shame of what their kind have brought to this world.

The Event

Our story begins on September 19, 2016, when Frank messaged a fellow degenerate about "killing an animal", obviously realizing that his fandom, which he had called his community for many a year, was in actuality a bunch of closeted pedophiles and "apologists".

The hunting party set out on Saturday, September 24, 2016, at sometime before 8:21 a.m., when the two ruffians entered the home of a wild and untamed furry family and proceeded to bag two large male specimens and one female. Unfortunately, they showed very mediocre behavior and weren't able to procure a trophy as the unwashed hordes of animal rights activists were hot on their tracks. The hunters had become the hunted.

Their hunting outing and subsequent victory was short-lived, however, as at 8:45 a.m. on Sunday, September 25, police arrested the two on false claims of poaching on private land. Our b-tech Buffalo Bill and Davy Crockett were held on $1 million bail each.

High Score

Graded Score
Kill count: 3/20 Mediocre at best
Accuracy: 15/20 Did actually manage to bag themselves three furries
Style: 0/20 Dumbasses, you call yourselves hunters? Didn't even take a trophy
Butthurt: 1/20 Barely got any media coverage. Like, has anyone even heard of Fullerton?
Bonus: 0/20 How about not being part of the fandom you're attacking, retards
Total Score: 19/100 (F)
Midwest FurFest 2: Electric Boogaloo
See full ranking


Wanted Level:

 

 

Mall Cop

Similar Event

This next one is infinitely more righteous than the aforementioned "hunt". What was attempted on this day should be recognized in all corners of the great sea as the work of a true intellectual:

In the year 2014, a suspected lone anon set out to right many of the world's wrongs. What he attempted was a mini-Holocaust, complete with (probably homemade) chlorine gas. The attack took place at some hotel hosting a mass furry orgy in Illinois. The attack itself failed miserably and showed that this anon's planning skill level rivaled William Atchison. It only succeeded in sending 19 "people" to the hospital and didn't even stop the fucking convention. However, with a little more planning and patience, it would've easily secured the anonymous hero as one of the greats.

Here are some reasons why this anon should be held to a higher rank than those bronies, despite not actually claiming any lives:

  1. He was not a member of the degenerates he so righteously purged.
  2. His modus operandi was more extravagant than just poaching, and mirrored the tactic of that guy.
 

Fullerton Triple Homicide is part of a series on

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