Reina Nightclub Massacre

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"Come on, it's lovely weather For a slay (ride together with you)"

Santa Claus
Nationality:	Turkroach
Highscore	Killed 39, injured 70.
Top 50?	6th
Style	FPS, single player
An Hero?	No.

As 2017 kicks in, the many residents of Istanbul, Turkey (both native and immigrants; why anybody wants to fly over there is beyond my comprehension) decide to do what they do best: go to a occupied, invite-only nightclub to commemorate the new year and what would be the many days ahead of them. Unfortunately, even the first day of a brand new year isn't going to make you impenetrable, and this rang true for the ones who were inside when a lone gunman, Abdulkadir Mashariapov armed with an AK-47 plus what seemed to be an endless supply of hand grenades became the somewhat shittier 2.0 version of Omar Mateen and reportedly killed 39 people, also injuring 70 others.

The attack came at night, the point where security measures were notably heightened, with approximately 17,000 police officers on duty at the time, but obviously they didn't do their fucking job right. The precautions were put in place following several terrorist attacks over the recent months, many of which were perpetrated by ISIS and Kurdish militants. Partygoers, including men in suits and women in cocktail dresses, were seen emerging from the nightclub in a state of shock. It was estimated up to 800 people may have been in the nightclub at the time of the shooting. Due to the police being overweight and therefore unable to run properly, the gunman continued to be at large and is still on the run as we speak, for an additional 15 days before being found at a friends apartment, and from what we know of Abdulkadir Mashrapov, he's a pretty cool guy.

Foreign Media Coverage

Like the idiots that they are, old media originally thought that there was two gunman, not one. This turned out to be false later on, but it does give a perfect example of how the news and other media sources are so quick to report on shit without knowing the true facts. Like the Mevlüt Mert Altıntaş incident which actually happened not too long ago, the gunman reportedly shouted "Allahu Akbar" while firing at the patrons. Turkey's President Recep Erdogan stated that the country was going to fight against terrorism, and was determined to destroy the source of threats and attacks against it. Once Turkish authorities realized that others were reporting on the event, they immediately sperged out on everyone and issued a temporary gag order. The shooting has been described as a 'terrorist attack' by Istanbul's governor, Vasip Şahin. Turkey's Prime Minister, Binali Yildirim, has denied initial reports that the shooter had been dressed as Santa Claus. A number of people jumped into the Bosphorus Strait to escape the attack, and we can only hope those losers drown to death because nobody will miss them. On January 2, ISIS took responsibility on Twitter for the attack, but authorities are still scrambling to find the killer.

America's Response

Obama was vacationing with his family in Hawaii so he really didn't give a shit, and only knew of the massacre when he was briefed on the attack by his national security. More sufficient evidence that he didn't give a fuck, he asked to be constantly updated as the situation developed, White House spokesman Eric Schultz said. They condemned what it was called as a "horrific terrorist attack" and offered help to Turkey, even though they knew for sure that they weren't going to give help for any person in that dump of a third-world country, and as the President of Dumbfuckistan, you know you only want the job to make yourself be considered as a public figure and not do anything you said you were going to do.

Score

Graded Score
Kill count:	39/20
Accuracy:	7/20 Just Spammed Shit like a Faggot.
Style:	10/20 Went in there and did what he had to do.
Butthurt:	18/20 "muh new year ruined"
Bonus:	10/20 Zerg rushed everyone.
Total Score: 84/100 (B)

HAPPY NEW YEAR! See full ranking

Wanted Level:

National Guard

See Also

• Pulse Nightclub Massacre
• Paris Mass Shooting
• Nice Truck Attack 2016
• Breitscheidplatz
• 1-14 Jakarta Attacks

External Links

• Istanbul nightclub gunman captured on CCTV
• 'At least 39 killed' in shooting at Istanbul nightclub

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