Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Jesse Osborne: Difference between revisions

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigation Jump to search
imported>Befreier
See also: 13 Year Old Boy
 
mNo edit summary
 
(16 intermediate revisions by 8 users not shown)
Line 1: Line 1:
Jesse Osborne is an edgy 14 year old faggot who killed his dad and drove his pick-up truck to his local elementary school and shot 3 people before being tackled and shackled. Frankly, no one gave a fuck about his chimpout. But what they didn't realize was that poor old Jesse was possessed by THE GRINCH- I mean, ADAM LANZA. Remember, that one autist who shot his mom and drove to his old elementary school and shot 20 kids. Jesse Osborne was first suspected to just be re-enacting Sandy Hook until the scientists at ED found out that Adam's ghost had possessed Jesse and decided to try and add more points to his high score but some fatass was lurking in the school and bellyflopped on Jesse.
{{AlGore}}
{{ib|[[File:JesseOsborne.png|100px]]}}
{{Ibhead|<big>'''Jesse Osborne'''</big>}}
{{Ibrow|'''Nationality:'''|[[Americunt]]&nbsp;&nbsp;[[File:MiniflagUSA.png]]}}
{{Ibrow|'''[[high score|Highscore]]'''|Killed 2, injured 3}}
{{Ibrow|'''Top 50?'''|lol no}}
{{Ibrow|'''Style'''|Single player}}
{{Ibrow|'''[[An Hero]]?'''|Nope}}
{{Ibend}}
 
[[File:Fatass.png|thumb|180px|right|Fatass that tackled him]]
[[File:Love.png|thumb|150px|right|Him and his daddy. Notice the possession of a tactical school shooter assault [[Dylann Roof|bowl cut]] [[Adam Lanza|hairstyle]].]]
'''Jesse Osborne''' is an [[edgy]] [[13 year old boy|14-year-old]] faggot who killed his dad and drove his pick-up truck to his local elementary school and shot 3 people before being tackled and shackled. His assault became known as the ''Townville Elementary School shooting'' (A.K.A Sandy Hook 2: [[Electric Boogaloo]]). Frankly, no one gave a fuck about his chimpout. But what they didn't realize was that poor old Jesse was possessed by THE GRINCH- I mean, [[Adam Lanza|ADAM LANZA]], the renowned autist who shot his mom and drove to his old elementary school and [[Win|shot 20 kids]]. Jesse Osborne was first suspected to just be re-enacting Sandy Hook until the scientists at ED found out that Adam's ghost had possessed Jesse and decided to try and add more points to his [[High Score]].
 
Before Jesse was able to go for the High Score, some fucking fatass kid was lurking in the school after scoffing down a super-sized severing of [[McDonald's]] and bellyflopped on Jesse, leading to his arrest. Jesse however said that he [[Pussy|threw his gun away and called his grandparents and cried to them on the phone before the fatass got to him.]] Either way, Jesse is now locked away in [[Prison|juvenile detention]], living the thug life segregated from the [[internets]], young [[wimminz]], and education for [[Assburgers|special needs students]]. All he has left to enjoy is getting his scrawny ass buttfucked during [[Bubba]]'s daily routine.
 
So apparently he was obsessed with [[Columbine]], [[Sarcasm|which is obviously so shocking as no one has ever copycatted Columbine before.]] He talked to fellow edgy teenagers on [[Instagram]] about his shitty unrealistic plans to [[School Shooting|sh0t sk0l n0w]] by [[Retard|buying an AR15 when he was only 14 or using dish soap to get the combination to his dad's gun safe "because it was glow in the dark" which would reveal his fingerprints.]] Makes perfect sense.
 
== Graded Score ==
 
{| style="{{roundy|18px}}{{gradlinear|red|orange}}box-shadow:0 3px 6px gray;padding:1em;margin:0 auto 1em auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="2" border="0"
|-
! colspan="2" style="{{roundy|9px}}background-color:red;box-shadow:0 3px 6px orange;" | <big>Graded score</big>
|-
| colspan="2" style="height:9px;overflow:hidden;" |
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Kill count:
|2/20
|-
! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" | Accuracy:
|8/20 2 killed, 3 injured.
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Style:
|10/20 ''Tryhard school shooting''
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Butthurt:
|4/20 ''No one really cared about this shooting. Plus school shootings are already ingrained in society.''
|-
! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" | Bonus:
|16/20 ''Pwned his dad before setting out for the High Score''
|-
! colspan="2" style="{{roundy|9px}}background-color:orange;box-shadow:0 3px 6px yellow;" | <big>Total score: 40/100 ('''F''')</big>
|}
 
<center>'''You will never outrank Adam Lanza. However, at least you did better than [[Brooke Higgins and Sienna Johnson]].'''</center>
<center>'''[[High Score|See full ranking]]'''</center>
 
 
<center>
<div style="{{roundy|10px}}border:2px solid #000;width:30%;background:linear-gradient(#d32f15, #227e84);background:-moz-linear-gradient(#002db3, #4da6ff);background:-webkit-linear-gradient(#002db3, #4da6ff);background:-o-linear-gradient(#e18f80, #666c05);padding:10px;font-weight:bold;font-size:larger">
<span style="font-size:16pt;">'''Wanted Level:'''</span>
<br>
<span> ___________________ </span>
{|align="center"
|[[File:Wantedstar.png|40px]]
|}
<span> ___________________ </span>
<br>
{|align="center"
|[[File:Wanted1mallcop.png|128px]]
|}
<br>
<span style="font-size:12pt;">'''Mall Cop'''</span>
</div><br>
</center>
{{cg|'''His Instagram shit'''|shotmeme3|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm1.jpg
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm2.jpg
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm3.jpg
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm4.jpg
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm5.jpg
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm6.jpg
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm7.jpg
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm8.jpg
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm9.jpg
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm10.jpg
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm11.jpg
File:Kmoshnbkkmfdm12.jpg
</gallery>|}}
 
== See also ==
 
* [[Adam Lanza]] - Jesse's idol.
* [[Sandy Hook]] - Jesse's Favorite CP Plot, but "I swear it wuz fake!!!" Said Alex Jones.
* [[Jaylen Fryberg]] - Another teen who chimped out at his school in 2014.
* [[Dylann Storm Roof]] - White supremacist faggot who went on a rampage in the same state as Jesse did.
* [[High Score]] - What he failed to achieve.
* [[An Hero]] - What he should have done.
* [[Bubba]] - The nigger who is tending to Jesse in juvenile [[prison]] right now.
 
{{High Scores}}
{{Psychopaths}}
 
[[Category:People|Osborne, Jesse]]
[[Category:2016]]

Latest revision as of 20:20, 19 August 2024

Jesse Osborne is yet another mediocre mass shooting article. You can help by not writing articles on every boring edgelord that goes postal and reminding the author they aren't AlGore.
Jesse Osborne
Nationality: Americunt  
Highscore Killed 2, injured 3
Top 50? lol no
Style Single player
An Hero? Nope


Fatass that tackled him
Him and his daddy. Notice the possession of a tactical school shooter assault bowl cut hairstyle.

Jesse Osborne is an edgy 14-year-old faggot who killed his dad and drove his pick-up truck to his local elementary school and shot 3 people before being tackled and shackled. His assault became known as the Townville Elementary School shooting (A.K.A Sandy Hook 2: Electric Boogaloo). Frankly, no one gave a fuck about his chimpout. But what they didn't realize was that poor old Jesse was possessed by THE GRINCH- I mean, ADAM LANZA, the renowned autist who shot his mom and drove to his old elementary school and shot 20 kids. Jesse Osborne was first suspected to just be re-enacting Sandy Hook until the scientists at ED found out that Adam's ghost had possessed Jesse and decided to try and add more points to his High Score.

Before Jesse was able to go for the High Score, some fucking fatass kid was lurking in the school after scoffing down a super-sized severing of McDonald's and bellyflopped on Jesse, leading to his arrest. Jesse however said that he threw his gun away and called his grandparents and cried to them on the phone before the fatass got to him. Either way, Jesse is now locked away in juvenile detention, living the thug life segregated from the internets, young wimminz, and education for special needs students. All he has left to enjoy is getting his scrawny ass buttfucked during Bubba's daily routine.

So apparently he was obsessed with Columbine, which is obviously so shocking as no one has ever copycatted Columbine before. He talked to fellow edgy teenagers on Instagram about his shitty unrealistic plans to sh0t sk0l n0w by buying an AR15 when he was only 14 or using dish soap to get the combination to his dad's gun safe "because it was glow in the dark" which would reveal his fingerprints. Makes perfect sense.

Graded Score

Graded score
Kill count: 2/20
Accuracy: 8/20 2 killed, 3 injured.
Style: 10/20 Tryhard school shooting
Butthurt: 4/20 No one really cared about this shooting. Plus school shootings are already ingrained in society.
Bonus: 16/20 Pwned his dad before setting out for the High Score
Total score: 40/100 (F)
You will never outrank Adam Lanza. However, at least you did better than Brooke Higgins and Sienna Johnson.
See full ranking


Wanted Level:
___________________

___________________


Mall Cop


See also

  • Adam Lanza - Jesse's idol.
  • Sandy Hook - Jesse's Favorite CP Plot, but "I swear it wuz fake!!!" Said Alex Jones.
  • Jaylen Fryberg - Another teen who chimped out at his school in 2014.
  • Dylann Storm Roof - White supremacist faggot who went on a rampage in the same state as Jesse did.
  • High Score - What he failed to achieve.
  • An Hero - What he should have done.
  • Bubba - The nigger who is tending to Jesse in juvenile prison right now.


 Jesse Osborne is part of a series on Are You Ready? [GAME OVERInsert Coin] Go!
Single Player Elite Hall of Fame

Adam Lanza • Anders Behring Breivik • Andrew Kehoe • Ariana Grande Massacre • Baruch Goldstein • Brenton Tarrant • Campo Elías Delgado • Cho Seung-Hui • Devin Patrick Kelley • Dong Yangling • Gabriel Wortman • Jack Gilbert Graham • Jakrapanth Thomma • James Huberty • Luby's massacre • Martin Bryant • Mutsuo Toi • Nice Truck Attack 2016 • Omar Mateen • Panya Khamrab • Patrick Crusius • Reina Nightclub Massacre • Salvador Ramos • Shinji Aoba • Stephen Paddock • Ted Bundy • Vladislav Roslyakov • William Unek • Woo Bum-kon

Single Player Amateur Division

Aaron Alexis • Alexandre Bissonnette • Akbarzhon Jalivov • Ali David Sonboly • Anderson Lee Aldrich • Andrea Pignani • Anton Lundin Pettersson • Artyom Kazantsev • Audrey Hale • Brandon Scott Hole • Breda Highschool Massacre • Breitscheidplatz • Brenda Ann Spencer • Bruce Jeffrey Pardo • Capital Gazette Shooting • Charles Whitman's Tumor • Chris Harper-Mercer • Connor Betts • Dallas Police Shootings • Darrell Brooks • David Katz • David Kozák • David Malcolm Gray • Death to Traitors, Freedom for Britain • Derrick Bird • DeWayne Craddock • Dimitrios Pagourtzis • Dimitrious Gargasoulas • Dmitry Vinogradov • Dylann Storm Roof • Elliot Rodger • Éric Borel • Euler Fernando Grandolpho • Flemming Nielsen • Fort Hood • Gabe Parker • George Sodini • Gian Luigi Ferri • Ian David Long • Ilnaz Galyaviev • Jake Davison • James Alex Fields • James Holmes • Jared Lee Loughner • Jason Dalton • Jason Rodriguez • Jaylen Fryberg • Jeffrey Dahmer • Jeff Weise • Jesse Osborne • Jiverly Voong • Joe Stack • John Russel Houser • John Wilkes Booth • Jonathan Sapirman • Josef Fritzl • Khalid Masood • Kimveer Gill • Kip Kinkel • Kongsberg Bow and Arrow Rampage • Lam Kor Wan • Mamoru Takuma • Marc Lépine • Mark Barton • Mark Essex • Martin Peyerl • Matthew de Grood • Michael Carneal • Michael Kenneth McLendon • Michael Ryan • Mikese Morse • Mr. Saari • Nathan Gale • Nghtmrchld26 • Nikolas Cruz • Noah Esbensen • Orlando Harris • Otoya Yamaguchi • Patrick Purdy • Payton Gendron • Pekka-Eric Auvinen • Petri Gerdt • Ramadan Van Man • Randy Robert Stair • Richard Speck • Robert Bales • Robert Bowers • Robert Card • Robert Crimo • Robert Hawkins • Robert Long • Robert Steinhäuser • Ruslan Akhtyamov • Ryan Palmeter • Santino William Legan • Satoshi Uematsu • Sayfullo Saipov • Stephen Kazmierczak • The Twinkie Man • Thomas Matthew Crooks • Thomas Watt Hamilton • Tim Kretschmer • Timothy Hendron • Timur Bekmansurov • TJ Lane • Tobias Rathjen • Trystan Andrew Terrell • Tyler Peterson • Unabomber • Wade Michael Page • Walter Seifert • Wellington Menezes de Oliveira • Zhao Zewei • Zug Massacre

Multiplayer Co-Op Mode

1-14 Jakarta Attacks • Academy Maniacs • Boston Marathon Bombing • Charlie Hebdo • Columbine • Crocus City Hall Massacre • Hiroshima and Nagasaki • ISIS Paris Attack 13-11 • Jews did WTC • London Bridge Attack 2017 • Medianeira School Shooting • Pearl Harbor • San Bernardino Shooting • Sri Lanka 2019 Terrorist Attacks • Suzano School Shooting • Timothy McVeigh • Zhaodong Massacre

Civilization and Great Prophets

Adolf Hitler • Augusto Pinochet • Charles Manson • Heaven's Gate • Holocaust • Jonestown • Joseph Stalin • Kim Il-sung • Mao Zedong • Osama bin Laden • Pol Pot • Saddam Hussein • Waco • World War II

Banned From Scoring

Alex Hribal • Anthony Warner • Anton Bichivin • Asa Coon • Ben Moynihan • Billy Mitchell • Brandon Clegg • Brian Isaack Clyde • Charles Bishop • Clay Duke • Dillon Cossey • Faisal Shahzad • Frank James • Hayden Jagst • Hugo Jackson • Ilya Ivanistov • John Earnest • Kyle Rittenhouse • Laaiti Ekenstéen • Lindsay Kantha Souvannarath • Logan Clark • MAGABomber • Mikhail Pivnev • Nasim Aghdam • Nicky Reilly • Philip Manshaus • Richard Reid • Ryan Routh • Sam Hyde • Sebastian Bosse • Sol Pais • Stephan Balliet • Todd Rogers • Willem Van Spronsen • William Atchison • You

 
Jesse Osborne is part of a series on Psychopaths
[It rubs the lotion on the skin or else it gets the hose againOpen the box]
Spree/One-time Killers:

Aaron Alexis • Adam Lanza • Alex Hribal • Alyssa Bustamante • Anthony Warner • Audrey Hale • Bruce Jeffrey Pardo • Casey Anthony • Cho Seung-Hui • Devin Patrick Kelley • Dylan Klebold • Dylann Storm Roof • Eric Harris • Gerry McCann • James Holmes • Jared Lee Loughner • Jason Rodriguez • Jeff Weise • Jiverly Voong • Joe Stack • Josef Fritzl • Laaiti Ekenstéen • Mark Essex • Martin Bryant • Matthew de Grood • Matthew Murray • Matti Saari • Maurice Clemmons • Pekka-Eric Auvinen • Raoul Moat • Richard Speck • Robert Hawkins • Stephen Paddock • Tim Kretschmer • Timothy Hendron • TJ Lane • Tyler Peterson • Wade Michael Page • Woo Bum-kon

Career/Serial Killers:

Academy Maniacs • Adolf Hitler • Charles Manson • Chris Benoit • Dnepropetrovsk Maniacs • Dubya • Jack the Ripper • Jeffrey Dahmer • Mao Zedong • Richard "The Iceman" Kuklinski • Ted Bundy

Terrorists:

Al Qaeda • Anders Behring Breivik • Anderson Lee Aldrich • Anton Lundin Pettersson • Dzhokhar Tsarnaev • Elliot Rodger • George Sodini • Maniacs Murder Cult • Mark Essex • Nidal Malik Hasan • Osama bin Laden • Tamerlan Tsarnaev • Ted Kaczynski

See also:

Antisocial personality disorder • Jews • Murder • Paranoid personality disorder • Pittsburgh Paint Job • Police Brutality • Sick fuck

Retrieved from "http://edramatica.com/index.php?title=Jesse_Osborne&oldid=1885261"