Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Profit

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
(Redirected from PROFIT!)
Jump to navigation Jump to search
???? PROFIT! is one of the more overused and/or misused memes on the internets.
USE IT AT YOUR OWN RISK (and NOT ON ED).
ALERT: THIS IS A FORCED MEME
Profit will be posted by the same
unfunny newfag until you like it.
OP

PROFIT!!1! is the natural product of ????, but has since been corrupted with artificial mass production by the organization that is Judaism©. Nonetheless it is craved as the ultimate goal in life to gain as much of it as possible (those that Jew learn this at an early age). Profit can come in a wide variety of forms and the achievement of any type of profit makes you a winnar. Gaining of profit is the only way to make your miserable excuse for a life worthwhile. By its very nature, all profit is delicious.

The term and it's use is originally from South Park's preachy lesson about how epic capitalism is. In the episode, the "Underpants Gnomes" are sneaking into South Park homes in the middle of the night (3 AM) to steal and stash peoples' underwear. But after getting busted by the gang, the gnomes use a highly advanced mathematical formula to explain how they turn stolen underwear into le profit. The phases of the formulae was as follows:

  1. Collect underpants
  2. ?
  3. Profit

Types of Profit

Although IRL profit usually refers to cash, profit as understood by in the internets exists as a tiered hierarchy. Many lesser profits can be exchanged for one of greater value.

The following paragraph is written by a registered sex offender and pedophile. To avoid discrimination, caution is advised.


Stupid retards

Delicious Loli

Delicious loli is a truly delicious kind of profit, outranking all profits save lulz. The ræp of a Loli is one of the ultimate goals of any Anon as it is a vital step towards winning the internets, and life itself. Remember, the more lolis that you raep before getting V& the more of a success your life has been. Also, nevar forget, stick it in the pooper. P.S. Watch for Pedobear, he tends to surface when loli is nigh.

Delicious AIDS

Delicious AIDS makes you win and become an hero in a matter of at least 4 months. Unlike lulz, AIDS is the real and unreal goal to finish your life. When used repeatedly, you will get an even greater profit! In fact, you will still either do it, faggot, do it for the lulz, or just delete everything for Christ's sake.

Delicious Drugs

Delicious drugs take away the pain of your miserable life and may give you a +5 to all stats.

Delicious Jew Golds

Contrary to expectations, Jew gold is almost the least valuable of profits. However, it is noteworthy because enough Jew golds can buy drugs or lolis, allowing you to strike at the weak-point for massive damage, but Jew gold will never buy you lulz. Note that, as the name would suggest, this level of profit is jealously guarded by our Jew overlords.

Accumulation of Jew golds is the best way to strike back at black person.

Delicious Cake

Delicious cake is always a perfectly acceptable profit for any struggle. Delicious cake can be traded in for small amounts of Jew golds or can be used as bait for lolis.

They all want cake.

Delicious Soup

Delicious Soup is a form of profit endorsed by moot, who loves it.

Internet Speakz

The following is the prescribed way to instruct someone on how to gain profit, normally sarcastically.

  1. Step one
  2. Step two
  3. ????
  4. PROFIT!!!

This construction is often used and 3 to 4 steps is usually the format. Longer may only be used in the event of truly epic lulz potential. An example for idiots follows.

  1. Go to store
  2. Buy drain cleaner
  3. Drink it
  4. ????
  5. PROFIT!!!
or
  1. Accuse Saddam of having weapons of mass destruction
  2. Invade Iraq
  3. Walk around for a while, kill some babies
  4. ????
  5. PROFIT!!!
or
  1. Film Loose Change after smoking weed
  2. Protest in everywhere and yell at Bush (like he gives a shit)
  3. Don mask and become Epic fail guy
  4. ????
  5. PROFIT!!!
or
  1. Get girlfriend ready for sex
  2. Turn off lights
  3. Leave and have dad enter room
  4. ????
  5. PROFIT!!!
or
  1. Make Cross
  2. Nail a guy to it
  3. Get an audience
  4. ????
  5. PROPHET!!!
or
  1. Watch Porn
  2. ????
  3. PROFIT!!!

See Also

Profit is part of a series on

Memes

Visit the Memes Portal for complete coverage.

Profit
is part of a series on serious business
Serious Concepts

Free SpeechIdentity theftIronyInternet assholeInternet CelebritiesInternet diseaseInternet dramaInternet humanitariansInternet LawInternet lawsuitInternet lawyerInternet stalkingInternet tough guyInternet Vigilante GroupOperation Falcon PunchSwattingVandalismWorld Wide Web Consortium

People & Organizations

2cashAlan TuringCasey SerinDavid HockeyDear Cis PeopleDoxbinFast EddieGrace SaundersHallcats SquadronJessi SlaughterMary BellMeek MillKittensMaja SchmidtMissyNiggest Crook ForcePsychopathVloggerheadsWEB SHERIFF

[RecessionInflation]
£€ Profit is a part of a series on Money
Companies

AdFlyAdobeAmazonAppleAT&TBDICBellBitcoinBurger KingCelestial ToystoreComcastCostcoDisneyDuckDuckGoeBayEthereumFox NewsGNWTGoogleHappy Madison ProductionsIBMIKEAMicrosoftMcDonald'sMTVNew Media RockstarsNintendoNovellOracle CorporationPatreonPayPalSonySun MicrosystemsT-MobileVerizonViacomWal-MartWikiaYahooYouTube

People

Bernie MadoffBill GatesChad HurleyGregory KohsHal TurnerJewsJimbo WalesKlaus SchwabL. Ron JeremyLarry SangerLyor CohenMario LaudicinaMartin ShkreliSteve ChenSteve Jobs

Ideology / Politics

AusterityBailout PlanCapitalismCommunismGlobalisationGovernmentGun controlHealth Care RageIceslaveJudaismKarl MarxObamacareRon PaulAyn RandRandroidSocialistRonald ReaganWelfareZeitgeist MovementZeitgeist - The Movie

Selling

AdvertisingBitcoinBriberyExtreme AdvertisingBilly MaysPorn AdvertisementsShamwowSpamSubservient ChickenWinnebago ManGeorge Zimmer

Topics

419 Nigerian Email ScamsThe Dot.Com BubbleEconomistEconomyForeign GirlfriendInternet moneyJew GoldMoneyNFTsPoorProfitRape dollarsScientologyToilet Paper HoardingUnlimited disposable income

Profit
is part of a series on
Jews
Patriarchs [-+]

Adam KatzAdam L. GoldsteinAl FrankenAlan MooreAlbert EinsteinAlex HirschAlicia VikanderAliza ShvartsAmy PascalAmy SchumerAndrew BreitbartAndy KaufmanAngelina JolieAnita SarkeesianAriana GrandeAyn RandBaruch GoldsteinBeastie BoysBen GarrisonBen ShapiroBen SteinBernie GoetzBernie MadoffBernie SandersBobby KotickBourg ProductionsBrie LarsonCasey NeistatChelsea ClintonChris SavinoChuck SchumerDan HarmonDan SchneiderDaniel BenfieldDanny ElfmanDaron NefcyDavid DraimanDavid KatzDebbie SchlusselDianne FeinsteinDonald DrumpfDoomentioDylan KleboldEd RendellEinsidlerEli KozinElliot RodgerElon MuskEmiNetEric AbramovEthan KleinFrank MillerGeorge SorosGirlvinylGreville JannerHarvey WeinsteinHenry KissingerHenry MakowHoward SternIce PoseidonJacob StellmachJared KnabenbauerJarlaxleArtemisJeff GoldblumJeffrey EpsteinJennifer LawrenceJerry SeinfeldJerry SpringerJesusJewWarioJim SterlingJoe LiebermanJohn KricfalusiJohn OliverJon StewartJonathan YanivJoshua Conner MoonJussie SmollettJustin RoilandKevin SmithKumichooKurt EichenwaldLaaiti EkenstéenLauren FaustLena DunhamLinda MackLyor CohenMandoPonyMark ZuckerbergMatt StoneMaury PovichMia JaninMichael BloombergsavetheinternetMichael RichardsMichael SavageMila KunisMiriam LazewatskyMonica LewinskyMonica RialMosesMoshe FinkbergMundaneMattNatalie PortmanNeil GaimanNihilistic SnakePACKGODPamela GellerPewDiePieQuinton ReviewsRachael MacFarlaneRahm EmanuelR@ygoldRebecca SugarRoman PolanskiRon JeremyRupert MurdochSacha Baron CohenSam HydeSeth MacFarlaneSeth RogenSusan WojcickiTara StrongThe Amazing RacistThe Fine BrosThe Krassenstein BrothersTim BurtonTodd GoldmanTodd HowardTony GoldmarkTrevor NoahWeevWil WheatonWoody AllenYandereDevYank Barry

Habitats [-+]
Traditions [-+]
H8s [-+]
Profit is part of a series on Language & Communication
Languages and DialectsGrammar, Punctuation, Spelling, Style, and UsageRhetorical StrategiesPoetryThe Politics of Language and CommunicationMediaVisual Rhetoric
Click topics to expand