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Old media

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Always accurate

Old media, sometimes referred to as mainstream media, is an increasingly irrelevant collection of communication and entertainment techniques and conspiracies that are heavily biased against you and your political viewpoint and philosophical stance. Therefore, everything bad that happens is most likely the fault of old media. As old media is old, it's neither cool nor funny. If you ever meet a member of the old media, be sure to give them AIDS. Old media is constantly screwing with our minds by telling us what to think. Also, parents love to endlessly discuss how the media corrupts our youth.

Last Thursday, the old media (New York Times) finally covered ED, much to the chagrin of moralists everywhere.

How new media corrupted everyone 4EVAR

Always hard hitting.

First literacy corrupted the youth according to older generations....
Then books corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then radio corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then comic books corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then television corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then video games corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then easily accessible Internet corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then smartphones and tablets corrupted the youth according to older generations...

Luckily, we have impeccable older role models to tell us that we are permanently doing it wrong!

Examples

Old media is known for it's highly accurate dating
How oldmemes went viral
Why God invented broadband
  1. Radio
  2. Television
  3. Tabloids
  4. Magazines
  5. Newspapers
  6. Web 1.0
  7. MRI
  8. BBS
  9. Email
  10. Former examples

Gallery

Media gallery About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

See also

Old media is part of a series on

Television

Visit the Television Portal for complete coverage.

Old media is part of a series on Language & Communication
Languages and DialectsGrammar, Punctuation, Spelling, Style, and UsageRhetorical StrategiesPoetryThe Politics of Language and CommunicationMediaVisual Rhetoric
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