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Golliwogg: Difference between revisions

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File:1960s magazine advert - golliwogg perfume.jpg|"Mmm, darling, you smell like a fake nigger"
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Revision as of 02:05, 7 April 2018

File:Authentic 19th-century golliwogg.jpg
Make your kids afraid to sleep with black person

A Golliwogg (also spelt "Golliwog" and a.k.a. Mr. Popo, Jynx and Imperfect Cell) is a popular children's character and doll that was created by Florence Kate Upton in 1894 and originally appeared in her book, The Adventures of Two Dutch Dolls and a Golliwogg. The Golliwogg is basically a rag doll and less smelly version of a nigger with a face that was meticulously drawn by Akira Toriyama. As of 2018, having a Golliwogg in the UK can get you arrested and charged with a hate crime.

There are two reasons for this bizarre and very British controversy. Firstly, Britain's most popular jam ("jelly," in American) is manufactured by a fine old British company, so fine and old that until a decade or two ago, it had a golliwogg as its mascot on every jar sold. Kids could snip the "Gollies" off the jar-labels, save them up, and send off to receive a highly-collectable "Golly" enamel button to wear. Now the country is full of cranky bastards of middle-age and above who think it is outrageous that "Golly" has been censored, and insist that there is nothing wrong with golliwoggs in any way, shape, or form.

Secondly, Britain's police forces are infamous for their racism and dislike of black person, and so they are always on the lookout for easily-solved "crimes" that have a whiff of racism. The police think it makes good PR to pacify all the permanently-complaining black person and it also helps the annual crime prevention statistics.

Honestly, that's all there is to it: Silly old-fashioned loudmouths who won't shut up about the good old days, and lazy cops who know how to score easy points by harassing them. Niggers probably have views on this controversy, but frankly so what.

Golliwogg martyrs

It is a fact of life that where there are black person, there will be crime. Naturally, this is also true of golliwogs.

Galleriwoggs



Gollivision


A 1983 ad for Britain's favorite marmalade, B& now of course.

Tie-in marmalade merchandising (highly-collectable and probably worth a fucking fortune now)

Classical music is racist too

See Also

External links

[WatermelonsFried Chicken]
Golliwogg is part of a series of topics related to Black People
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