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{{an hero}}
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__NOTOC__
{{offended}}
[[Image:Nikkicatsouras3.jpg|thumb|Nikki Catsouras: A waste of a good vagina.]]
[[Image:Nikkicatsouras3.jpg|thumb|Nikki Catsouras: A waste of a good vagina.]]
'''Nikki "Porsche Girl" Catsouras''' aka '''Nearly Headless Nikki''' was an [[16 year old girl|18 year old]] [[whore]] who proved, yet again, that women can't drive. On Halloween 2006, she decided to steal her father's [[Lioncash|$150,000]] Porsche and take it for a drive; she was later found [[Guro|deader than fuck]] with traces of [[420chan|cocaine]] in her system. According to her mother, Nikki had an inoperable brain tumor that [[lie|caused]] her to have a severe [[16-year-old girl|psychotic]] reaction to the drug, resulting in her hitting another car and subsequently [[barrel roll|barrel rolling]] into a concrete tollbooth at [[at least 100|approximately 100]] mph. In typical [[emo]] "no one understands me" drama, she became one with a toll booth on highway 241, her [[Pwnt|head smashed to bits]]. Concerned internet [[troll|citizens]] [[GOGOGOGO|rushed]] to [[Image Macro|inform]] the [[Attention whore|family]].


'''Nicole "Nikki" Catsouras''' (a.k.a. '''Porsche Girl''', '''Nearly Headless Nikki''' and '''The Headless Porschewoman of Lake Forest California''') was an [[16 year old girl|18-year-old]] [[whore]] who proved, yet again, that [[Obvious|women can't drive]]. On [[Halloween]] [[2006]], Nikki decided to steal her father's [[Lioncash|$150,000]] Porsche [[9/11|911]] and take it for a drive; she was later found [[Guro|deader than fuck]] with traces of [[420chan|cocaine]] in her system. According to her mother, Nikki had an inoperable brain tumor that [[lie|caused]] her to have a severe [[16-year-old girl|psychotic]] reaction to the drug, resulting in her hitting another car and subsequently [[barrel roll|barrel rolling]] into a concrete tollbooth at [[at least 100|approximately 100]] mph. In typical [[emo]] "no one understands me" drama, she became one with a toll booth on highway 241, her [[Pwnt|head smashed to bits]]. Concerned internet [[troll|citizens]] [[GOGOGOGO|rushed]] to [[Image Macro|inform]] the [[Attention whore|family]].
[[Some argue|Legends say]] that Nikki's [[Ghost|restless spirit]] still travels the roads of [[The OC|Orange County]], [[California]] in the form of a modern Dullahan driving a ghostly Phantom Porsche and often asks toll booth attendants if they'd be willing to give her [[Cunnilingus|head]] and/or [[cocaine]].


{{quote|Ur a dumb dick 4 saying these things about Nikki, when u die i'm gonna laugh my ASS OFF ASS HOLE!!! it's not good news that she is dead u Disgusting pig, Why don't u go materbate or somthing. and that hurt alot of people, her best friend, her family, her boy friend, and u think she is a total waste of vagina, ur a total waste, of living so, why dont u just kill ur self now and do EVERYONE A HUGE FAVOR U DISGUSTING UGLY FUCKING DICK!!!!|A white knight defending a dead girl he wants to fuck}}
__TOC__


{{clear}}


==Nikki Lives!! ==
==Nikki Lives!! ==
[[Image:Porsche_911_crash_9.jpg|thumb|Put the top down, Nikki! That's a bit too much off the top sis.]]
[[Image:Porsche_911_crash_9.jpg|thumb|Put the top down, Nikki! That's a bit too much off the top sis.]]
{{quote|People are sick.|Christos Catsouras|BAWWWWW}}
{{quote|People are sick.|Christos Catsouras|BAWWWWW}}
However, [[Necrophilia|two California Highway Patrol investigators]], Aaron Reich and Thomas O'Donnell, posted the photos of the accident to the internet. O'Donnell claimed that he only emailed the photos to himself for [[fap|viewing at a later time]], while Reich admitted to sending the photos to four people. "[[CSIII|Internet hackers]]", quite possibly under the influence of steroids, immediately started sending the pictures to as many of Nikki's friends and relatives as possible. Some of these messages even arrived [[win|during her funeral]].  
However, [[Necrophilia|two California Highway Patrol investigators]], Aaron Reich and Thomas O'Donnell, leaked the photos which naturally were posted to the internet. O'Donnell claimed that he only emailed the photos to himself for [[fap|viewing at a later time]], while Reich admitted to sending the photos to four people. "[[CSIII|Internet hackers]]," quite possibly under the influence of [[HACKERS ON STEROIDS|steroids]], immediately started sending the pictures to as many of Nikki's friends and relatives as possible. Some of these messages even arrived [[win|during her funeral]]. Ironically, Nikki was actually going to college to study photography. What a twist of fate!


Nikki's parents have blown $3,000 on hiring [[Reputation Defender]] in a successful attempt to waste $3,000. However, they are to date unsuccessful in their attempt to [[Delete fucking everything|remove all copies]] of the [[Masturbation|fappable]] pics of their daughter from the [[internets]]. Don't they know that if it's on the internet, it never goes away? Dumbasses.
Nikki's parents have blown $3,000 on hiring [[Reputation Defender]] in a successful attempt to waste $3,000. However, they are to date unsuccessful in their attempt to [[Delete fucking everything|remove all copies]] of the [[Masturbation|fappable]] pics of their daughter from the [[internets]]. Don't they know that if it's on the internet, it never goes away? Dumbasses.


On May 14, 2009, in an attempt to milk even moar money out of the Catsourasses, Reputation Defender set up a web site called "[http://www.supportnikki.org/ A Tribute To Nikki Catsouras]", that asked people to report all instances of the post-crash pics of Nikki, and requests that any one who has a web site with the images to "Please Remove These Photos From Your Web Site". No word on how many ED admins passed out laughing at said request. As of February, 2012, Reputation Defender redirected the Nikki Catsouras "tribute" to their own website.
On May 14, 2009, in an attempt to milk even moar money out of the Catsourasses, Reputation Defender set up a web site called "[http://www.supportnikki.org/ A Tribute To Nikki Catsouras]"{{wayback|http://www.supportnikki.org/|20090531005817}}, that asked people to report all instances of the post-crash pics of Nikki, and requests that any one who has a web site with the images to "Please Remove These Photos From Your Web Site." No word on how many ED admins [[Ignored|passed out laughing]] at said request. As of February, 2012, Reputation Defender redirected the Nikki Catsouras "tribute" to their own website.


Some admins were, however, willing to consider it, in exchange for pix of Catsouras daughter tits (which is very fair by internet standards). Their offers were refused.
Some admins were, however, willing to consider it, in exchange for pix of Catsouras daughter tits (which is very fair by internet standards). Their offers were refused.


{{squote| As a father I would never let my daughter take cocaine and drive off like your daughter. I hope you become better parents after this and stop trying to censor the internet. May God be with you. | [[Cockmongler|Richard C. Mongler]], supportnikki.org Guestbook |}}
{{squote| As a father I would never let my daughter take cocaine and drive off like your daughter. I hope you become better parents after this and stop trying to censor the internet. [[Fuck you|May God be with you.]] | [[Cockmongler|Richard C. Mongler]], supportnikki.org Guestbook |}}


=== GTFO N00bs ===
=== GTFO N00bs ===
According to multiple news sources, the Catsourasses (or at least those who still have faces) [[Quitting IRC forever|no longer use the internet]]. [[Attention whore|Nikki's parents]] have pulled their living daughter from school because they fear other students might confront her with the pictures. [[Anonymous]] has taken their actions as a challenge, and plans to [[Penis|erect]] a billboard bearing the images outside the girl's bedroom window.
According to multiple news sources, the Catsourasses (or at least those who still have faces) [[Quitting IRC forever|no longer use the internet]]. [[Attention whore|Nikki's parents]] have pulled their living daughter from school because they fear other students might confront her with the pictures. [[Anonymous]] has taken their actions as a challenge, and plans to [[Penis|erect]] a billboard bearing the images outside the girl's bedroom window.


There is also a campaign to start geocaching at her burial site, located in Pacific View Memorial Park, Corona Del Mar, CA.
There is also a campaign to start geocaching at her burial site, located in Pacific View Memorial Park, Corona Del Mar (ugly [[white trash]]/soccer-mom filled shithole in [[Garbage|Orange County]]), CA.
 
==Gallery==
===Before===
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Nicole Catsouras.jpg|Oh nooes my head is going to hit this wall
Image:Nikki-catsouras1.jpg|Graduating from driver's ed
Image:Catsourasfamily.jpg|Nikki's Jew family.
Image:Nikki-catsouras_(1).jpg|<s>As close as you can get without your eyes watering</s>
Image:Nikkkki!.jpeg|I can get closer
Image:Nikki's Alternate timeline mugshot.jpeg|Her mugshot from an alternate timeline where she got arrested for reckless driving
</gallery>
</center>
 
===After===
<center>
<gallery perrow="6">
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 02.jpg|The aftermath of a [[barrel roll]].
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 01.jpg|How do I crashed Porsche?<br>Answer: Hopped up on [[Hookers and blow|coke]]
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 03.jpg|I just took an ounce of cocaine, dare me to drive?
<gallery>
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 04.jpg|You can clearly see the tumor here
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 05.jpg|Lucky officer given the honor of picking Nikki's skull out of the pavement.
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 06.jpg|[[Put shoe on head|Put car on head]]
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 07.png|[[Necrophilia|I'd still hit it]].
Image:Porsche girl's face was found intact! (Not her, retard).jpg|<s>Porsche Girl's face was found intact!</s> (Not her, retard)
Image: Nicole Catsouras Victim.jpg|The person she hit before [[suicide|quitting irl]]
Image: NikkiCatsourasSniperPOV.jpg|The sniper's POV
Image:Porsche accident map.jpg|Coordinates in the external links section
Image: Memorial2.jpg|If /b/tards had had their way, the memorial would have looked something like this.
</gallery>
</center>
 
===The Internet Reacts===
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Nikki_Pix.gif|"[[MOAR]] [[pix|PHOTOS]]."
Image:NIKKICATSOURAS-TheBrutalAftermath.png|The brutal aftermath
Image:Nicolecatsouras.JPG|[[Reputation Defender]] advertisement
Image:NikkiShrine.jpeg|PREPARE THE SACRIFICE
Image:Nikki 4chan moment.png|[[DO IT FAGGOT|BOW TO HER]]
</gallery>
</center>
 
==Video Gallery==
{{Videoframe|vf1|{{roundy|.9em}}background-color:lightgray;border:.5em solid gray;margin:0 auto 1em auto;text-align:center;|font-weight:bold;
 
|<youtube>Zkw8T-Pm72k</youtube>
;Some retard tried to contact her ghost
 
|<youtube>eDyWAHqAtKE</youtube>
;It seems that [[Logan Paul]] didn't learn his lesson about putting dead bodies on YouTube
 
|<youtube>inQt7Aa7-gY</youtube>
;A wizard visits her grave
 
|<youtube>ww85rUzhrdU</youtube>
;The wizard's follow-up video
 
|<youtube>cO3bK5Rm-og</youtube>
;She's alive!
 
|<youtube>UQDosRpNn8o</youtube>
;[[Doctor Phil|Dr. Phil]] sends his viewers out on a scavenger hunt to find the photos
 
}}
 
===Crash Simulations===
{{Videoframe|vf1|{{roundy|.9em}}background-color:lightgray;border:.5em solid gray;margin:0 auto 1em auto;text-align:center;|font-weight:bold;
 
|<youtube>KoIQgFduOmM</youtube>
;A high quality reconstruction of the event
 
|<youtube>roQO8XmC4p0</youtube>
;[[Too soon|TOO SOON]]
 
|<youtube>NUTG2g8FdL4</youtube>
;Somebody actually put effort in this one
 
|<youtube>beTjcRYStXc</youtube>
;This one is one of the more accurate ones
 
|<youtube>Tnrh1el-Z3k</youtube>
;Boy, people sure do like making these
 
|<youtube>WwIvn-TH-jc</youtube>
;Another one? [[STOP POSTING]]
 
|<youtube>cUHWU5lTmiE</youtube>
;[[Truth|You just can't stop the internet.]] The Catsourases had to learn that the hard way.
 
}}


==KA-CHING!==
==KA-CHING!==
[[Shocked and Appalled]], [[Attention whore|Nikki's parents]] concluded that a good [[lolsuit]] would put an end to the harassment. They filed a Jew against the state for "[[butthurt|emotional and punitive damages]]"; discounting the cost of the written-off Porsche, a replacement Porche, and the overall cost of raising their daughter, that comes to about $19 million in [[profit]]. The [[lolsuit]] is currently <s>pending</s> <s>[http://www.ocregister.com/articles/catsouras-family-chp-2003372-lawsuit-dispatchers dismissed.]</s> <s>[http://www.ocregister.com/articles/catsouras-nikki-family-2137164-chp-lawsuit appealed.]</s> <s>[http://blogs.ocweekly.com/navelgazing/breaking-news/court-chp-officers-who-put-tee/ remanded]</s> [http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-chp-photos-20120131,0,5997021.story settled for $2.37 million dollars.]
[[File:Thomas O'Donnel 1000 Yard Stare.jpg|thumb|Thomas O'Donnell, one of the CHP's trolls who took the photos.]]
{{quote|One of the dispatchers, Thomas O'Donnell, was reprimanded and disciplined but not fired.The other dispatcher, Aaron Reich, resigned for reasons he said were unrelated to the leaked pictures.|[http://www.ocregister.com/news/family-337967-catsouras-nikki.html Sounds legit]}}
[[Shocked and Appalled]], [[Attention whore|Nikki's parents]] concluded that a good [[lolsuit]] would put an end to the harassment. They filed a lolsuit against the state for "[[butthurt|emotional and punitive damages]]"; discounting the cost of the written-off Porsche, a replacement Porsche, and the overall cost of raising their daughter, that comes to about $19 million in [[profit]]. The [[lolsuit]] is currently <s>pending</s> <s>[http://www.ocregister.com/articles/catsouras-family-chp-2003372-lawsuit-dispatchers dismissed.]</s> <s>[http://www.ocregister.com/articles/catsouras-nikki-family-2137164-chp-lawsuit appealed.]</s> <s>[http://blogs.ocweekly.com/navelgazing/breaking-news/court-chp-officers-who-put-tee/ remanded]</s> [http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-chp-photos-20120131,0,5997021.story settled for $2.37 million dollars.]
{{quote|One of the dispatchers, Thomas O'Donnell, was reprimanded and disciplined but not fired.The other dispatcher, Aaron [[Nazi Germany|Reich]], resigned for reasons he said were unrelated to the leaked pictures.|[http://www.ocregister.com/news/family-337967-catsouras-nikki.html Sounds legit]}}
 
==  Standard White Knightery ==
 
{{quote|Ur a dumb dick 4 saying these things about Nikki, when u die i'm gonna laugh my ASS OFF ASS HOLE!!! it's not good news that she is dead u Disgusting pig, Why don't u go materbate or somthing. and that hurt alot of people, her best friend, her family, her boy friend, and u think she is a total waste of vagina, ur a total waste, of living so, why dont u just kill ur self now and do EVERYONE A HUGE FAVOR U DISGUSTING UGLY FUCKING DICK!!!!|A white knight defending a dead girl he wants to fuck}}
 
==Porsche Girl: The Book==
You see, after Nikki's untimely death, her mother, Lesli Catsouras, began writing an epic novel with the aim of turning her daughter's misadventure into a New York Times bestseller. After almost half a decade of doodling around in her notebook, she finally decided to release the long awaited thriller along with a promotional website and Facebook page.
 
{{wayback|https://foreverexposed.com/welcome.html|20171214220353|title=Take a look at an archived version of the site here.}}
 
{{fb|Forever-Exposed-The-Nikki-Catsouras-Story-100072207781531|Associated Facebook page}}
 
Some bonus materials in the book include samples of quotes from some of the lulziest trolls at the beginning of each chapter.
 
[https://archive.org/details/foreverexposedme0000cats You can read the book here on the Internet archive! (Need to make an account tho)]
 
[https://files.catbox.moe/lw1c9k.pdf Or here's the PDF if ur too lazy to make one.]
{{center|<gallery perrow="4">
File:Forever Exposed 1.jpg|[[Self-troll|The picture of the wrecked Porsche is right there on the cover]]
File:Forever Exposed 2.jpg|Rare picture of Nikki loling at this article
File:Lesli's Book.jpg|[[Troll's Remorse|This is all your fault]]
File:Viewing the site in third person.jpg|Viewing the site in third person mode
File:Forever-Exposed-Award.jpg|Mission
File:CatsourasAward2012.jpg|Accomplished
</gallery>}}
 
===A Selection of Cool Quotes===
<center>
{{frame|{{morphquote|mqtest5|background-color: white; width: 600px; height: auto;|font-weight: bold;
|[[Irony|Wouldn’t it be cool, Mom, if I got famous someday, in some freaky, weird way?]]|Nikki Catsouras (SOMEBODY PLEASE TELL HER) (Pg. 50)
|Well, then, maybe you need to go down to the station with a gun and start shooting until you get some answers. Maybe then someone would help us!|Lesli telling Christos to go apeshit (Pg. 138)|I slide my hand into the drawer, past the stationary and the paper clips, to the space above the wooden lathe where I hide my loaded gun. I let the palm of my hand brush against the cold, steel barrel and my mind races ahead. Suddenly, I’m not feeling the pain of everything I've lost, but a sense of justice and satisfaction as I grip the piece.|Christos? (Pg. 244)|Slowly, and carefully, I pull the gun toward my body, letting revenge course through my veins like a drug. It’s a total rush. For the next few minutes, I just sit and listen to the fiery sounds of my own heart pounding, and relish the sense of need — and power and validation — that I am feeling. I almost don't care if I go to jail. I feel my eyes close and my finger slides against the trigger. My thumb — by its own will —  presses down into place. I hear a sudden snap when my eyes pop open. I wonder if this dispatcher realizes that at any second I could walk right up to him and destroy his life just as recklessly and pathetically as he has destroyed mine. Because I am capable now of doing things I had never dreamed of doing before.|CHIRSTOS CATSOURAS ALMOST [[Postal|WENT POSTAL]] (Pg. 245)
}}|border=black|background=white}}
</center><br /><br />
 
===UH-OH! It's not canon?===
Based on a rather [[h8|unfavorable review]] of the book, it seems that Lesli's account of Nikki may be more of a [[fanfic]] than a biography.
 
[[File:BadFanFic.png|center|thumb|[https://www.amazon.com/review/R1HD8PUL9VL67J A Family Conspiracy]]]
 
[[Surprise|So Christos is actually Nikki's step-dad? Whaaaat?]]
 
In an incredible turn of events, we learn that Nicole Ellise Catsouras was actually born as <b>Nicole Ellise Mayo</b>. [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User_talk:FurNEliseM A Wikipedia user] confirms this information in one of [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Nikki_Catsouras_photographs_controversy&direction=next&oldid=412788589 his edits to her article] and claims that that is indeed the name printed on her death certificate. [[Shit nobody cares about|The more you know!]] Why the Catsourases chose to [[Stalin|airbrush out]] the Mayos from the Porsche Girl franchise is still a mystery though. Maybe they wanted to spare them from the trolling? [[Jewish|Maybe they wanted to keep all the prize money for themselves?]] Who knows.
 
{{Megaphone|UPDATE: It's confirmed that Christos is Nikki's stepfather in [https://casetext.com/case/mayo-v-odonnell these court documents] filed by her biological father Tony Mayo! The secret's out!}}
 
 
[[File:Nikki with her real dad (Tony Mayo).jpg|center|thumb|Nikki with her real dad, Tony Dean [[Mayonnaise|Mayo]]]]
 
==Porsche Girl: The Movie?==
[[I am disappoint|Not really.]] Nikki's family clearly loves attention though, as they appeared for five minutes in this documentary, "Lo and Behold, Reveries of the Connected World," on the tenth year anniversary of her death. They went from [[Doctor Phil|Dr. Phil]] to the big screen. [[Not|Impressive!]] If you'd like, you can watch it for free on Tubi and Plex right now. They appear around the 28 minute mark. Hey, [[Elon Musk]] is in it too!
 
 
[[File:Lo and Behold.. The Catsourases!.png|center|500px|thumb|The Catsourases a decade later. [[Awkward|The kids have no idea where to look lol.]]]]
 
{{quote|I have always believed that the internet is a manifestation of the anti-Christ.|Lesli Catsouras}}
 
==2021: Still in the News?==
We reached [[2021]]. [[COVID]] has ripped our world apart. [[ED]] has died and was revived via [[Necrophilia|necromancy]] for the [[At least 100|1,000th]] time. And somehow, the Catsourases are still relevant. In their latest cameo appearance, they insert themselves into the [[Kobe Bryant]] helicopter crash arc, hoping to ally themselves with Vanessa Bryant who is fighting to keep the Basketball-American's death photos from being [[lulz|leaked online]]. Perhaps the Catsourases believed that if they could get a famous figure like Ms. Bryant on their side, they could finally get their "Right to be forgotten" law in the bag. [[Fail|Three years later though, and nothing seems to have come from it.]]


==Moral of teh story==
==Moral of teh story==
Concrete > Car
{{center|<gallery>
File:NikkiYearbook.jpg
File:Plus sign.png
File:Porsche911BlackConvertable.jpg
File:Equals sign.png
File:Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 06.jpg
</gallery>}}
 
Concrete > [[Car]]


Drug > Booze
Drug > [[Booze]]


Dead Daughter = $$$
Dead Daughter = [[Epic Win|$$$]]


Our anon friends have conjured a magical formula to... produce heroine!
Our anon friends have conjured a magical formula to... produce heroine!
Line 43: Line 204:
Cocaine + Driving = [[Heroine]]
Cocaine + Driving = [[Heroine]]


Booze + Driving = Also[[Hero]]
Booze + Driving = Also [[Hero]]


So if you don't want to be ze [[Hero]], don't do drugs kids! You cannot get vaginas if you are deader than fuck!
[[Unfunny|So if you don't want to be ze Hero, don't do drugs kids! You cannot get vaginas if you are deader than fuck!]]


'''Legal Disclaimer: Meme status and cash is not guaranteed upon death.'''
'''Legal Disclaimer: Meme status and cash is not guaranteed upon death.'''


<center>
<center>
<youtube>1gNzfCoknGM</youtube>
<youtube>DwrHwZyFN7M</youtube>
</center>
</center>


==Gallery==
 
===Before===
==Extras==
===Chat Transcript===
One of Nikki's friends uploaded a transcript of an instant messaging conversation to her blog after she died:
 
{{cs2|Nikkichat|Chat with Nikki|
 
<pre>
Nikki Catsouras = PlieSexSiielking.
 
 
zerosanddones: Hey.
PlieSexSiielking: hey
zerosanddones: I got your message. But I didnt have time to write back.
11:55 PM
zerosanddones: I just thought it was unfair.
zerosanddones: Im clean.
zerosanddones: And I have stopped using.
PlieSexSiielking: im sorry if you see it that way but with everything thats been going on, more than you even. not just with drugs but for my well being
zerosanddones: I know.
zerosanddones: I jsut thought we could maybe stay clean together
PlieSexSiielking: you think you do but you have no idea
zerosanddones: And help each other.
PlieSexSiielking: im fine keeping clean, its been fun for me
12:00 AM
zerosanddones: I like being sober too.
zerosanddones: But Im not understanding..
zerosanddones: You don't want to see me anymore although I'm clean, and you're clean?
PlieSexSiielking: correct, like i said before its much more than you will understand
PlieSexSiielking: im sorry
zerosanddones: Can you tell me so I can understand?
PlieSexSiielking: we come from differents worlds
PlieSexSiielking: i come from outerspace
zerosanddones: Nikki.
PlieSexSiielking: no really
12:05 AM
PlieSexSiielking: maybe
PlieSexSiielking: who knows
PlieSexSiielking: but
PlieSexSiielking: its an understanding you will only recieve in a different life time
PlieSexSiielking: a different life
PlieSexSiielking: and if you dont understand that, well.. you will in a different life
zerosanddones: Nikki, you know Im a pretty understanding person.
zerosanddones: I am grasping in what you're saying.
zerosanddones: But it doesn't make sence.
PlieSexSiielking: i know you are liz, and youve been really good and true to me and i thank you for that
zerosanddones: You told me something like this when you were on acid.
PlieSexSiielking: hah
12:10 AM
PlieSexSiielking: did you know i walked up a hill for twenty minutes barefoot on acid
PlieSexSiielking: and at the top of the hill i sat on the ground next to one coutch filled with people
PlieSexSiielking: i felt sad that night
zerosanddones: Yes.
PlieSexSiielking: and walked up a little further to the mood
PlieSexSiielking: moon
PlieSexSiielking: and could feel jesus
zerosanddones: But you never told me why you were sad.
zerosanddones: I know that you're a depressive person.
zerosanddones: Did Jesus say anything to you?
PlieSexSiielking: no, i was sad because i was alone on acid
zerosanddones: Remember that Leah and I were also on acid that night and we went to your house and rang the doorbell, knocked on doors and windows for 30 minutes?
12:15 AM
zerosanddones: We wanted to rescue you.
zerosanddones: And be with you.
PlieSexSiielking: that was sweet
zerosanddones: We sware, we had the thought that Julien was corrupting you. In a way, it was true.
zerosanddones: Then I had a complete feeling of failure that I had lost you. (because you didn't come out of your house)
PlieSexSiielking: you tripped me out, i dint know it was you
zerosanddones: Haha well. its acid!
PlieSexSiielking: true that
12:30 AM
zerosanddones: What do you do all the time now?
zerosanndones: Am I getting anywhere even? A slight understanding?
12:40 AM
zerosanddones: OK there might be more. I can get that.
12:55 AM
PlieSexSiielking has gone offline.
 
</pre>|0}}
 
 
Transcript recovered from [https://findadeathforum.com/showthread.php?2761-Opinions-on-the-leak-of-Nicole-Nikki-Catsouras-Pictures&p=115523#post115523 findadeathforum.com] {{Archive|2w79y}}
 
 
[[Emo|This is so sad im gonna criii :'(]]
 
From this conversation, we can see that Nikki's drug problem was [[Drug Addict|much greater than originally thought.]] Coke '''AND''' acid? Oh Nikki, [[Drugs|what were you thinking?]]
 
On a side note, her username appears to have came from the song [[Word salad|"Pliesex Sielking"]] by Dntel. The song sounds like an acid trip, so it's quite fitting.
 
 
<center>
<center>
<gallery>
<youtube>UTzvXRYqDwA</youtube>
Image:Nikki-catsouras1.jpg|Graduating from driver's ed LOLZ I GET IT
Image:Nicole Catsouras.jpg|Oh nooes my head is going to hit this wall
Image:Catsourasfamily.jpg|Nikki's Jew family. LOLOCAUST! CUZ THEY SUED TEHYRE LIEK JEWS, EVEN THOUGH THERE [[Armenian|GREEK]]!
</gallery>
</center>
</center>


===After===
 
<center>
===Song her sister made for her===
<gallery>
 
Image:Nikki-catsouras-crash1.jpg|The aftermath of a [[barrel roll]].
 
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 01.jpg|How do I crashed Porsche?<br>Answer: Hopped up on [[Hookers and blow|coke]]
{{#ev:soundcloud|https://soundcloud.com/daniellemari/never-coming-back-again|500|center||frame}}
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 03.jpg|"Fuck around and leave a nigga brain on duh steet, uuuuuuwwwwwww" ~ black person
 
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 04.jpg|You can clearly see the tumor here
 
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 05.jpg|Lucky officer given the honor of picking Nikki's skull out of the pavement.
Danielle also made Nikki and their deceased grandmother another song titled "Angels" that was posted on her Myspace eons ago, but you know how [[shit|broken]] that site is now.
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 06.jpg|[[Put shoe on head|Put car on head]]
 
Image: Nicole Catsouras is Dead Thank God 07.jpg|[[Necrophilia|I'd still hit it]].
{{archive|Bc6gY|You can at least look at it}}
Image: Nicole Catsouras Victim.jpg|The person she hit before [[suicide|quitting irl]]
 
Image:Nikki_Pix.gif|"[[MOAR]] [[pix|PHOTOS]]."
===Another level of irony===
Image: Memorial.jpg|If /b/tards had had their way, the memorial would have looked something like this.
If you actually read the acknowledgements of the book, you would know that Lesli's father is [[Dick]] [[Simon]]. As it turns out, Dick Simon was actually a [[Drive|famous race car driver]] back in his day with his very own page on [[TOW]]! ([[wikipedia:Dick Simon|See here]]) This means that our dear Nikki was the granddaughter of a professional! Clearly, the gene that holds the driving skills have skipped a generation...
</gallery>
 
</center>
For further confirmation, here is his Failbook. Notice how he is friends with both Lesli and Christos, and all the [[racism|racing]]-related posts:
 
{{fb|100008669983208|Dick Simon}}
 
===New Website===
After the collapse of the aforementioned foreverexposed.com, Nikki's mother made another website to promote her other books. Don't worry though! Nikki's book is still featured heavily on this new site. Like the previous site, she failed to pay the rent and the site is now booted out of existence and only lives on through the power of the great Wayback Machine.
 
{{wayback|http://whensecretscollide.com/|20180207220430|title=Archive of Lesli's new site}}
 
===Various Facebook accounts for the curious===
Some freak (not me) has been recording ALL of Nikki's family's Facebook accounts and other sensitive info. On top of that, he records all this information in one of the weirdest formats possible: an archive of a Google search. [[Srsly|No, really.]] See them here:
 
*{{archive|tVcWU|Catsourases' & Mayos' FB dump}}
*{{archive|GcCMx|Other random information}}
 
Protip: Paste the whole thing into a doc for easier reading.
 
==See also==
[[File:GOODNIGHT SWEET PRINCESS.jpg|center|600px|thumb|[[Goodnight Sweet Prince|GOODNIGHT, SWEET PRINCESS!]]]]
 
 
'''[[RIP|RIP IN PEPPERONIS:]]'''
*[[So cash]] - AKA Paulie Carbone, a meme who went splat in a car accident just a year after Nikki
*[[Nick Hogan]] - Crashed his car a year after Nikki but SURVIVED
*[[Porsche Boy]] - Less interesting male counterpart
*[[Rob Levin]] - Got ka-chow'd by car a month before Nikki
 
 
'''Also,'''
*[[Reputation Defender]] - Waged a war against the internet to try and get the photos taken down
*[[Streisand Effect]] - The real villain of this story
*[[Ferrari Guy]] - Another person associated with a car (didn't crash tho)
*[[Ogrish.com]] - An ancient gore site that morphed into [[LiveLeak]] the same day Nikki got pwned
*[[View My Death]] - A tribute site & internet forum where people can discuss [[Goth|DEATH]]
*[[John Earnest]] - Committed a synagogue shooting and mosque burning session just an hour away


==External Links==
==External Links==
Line 83: Line 363:
*[http://www.forbes.com/forbes/2007/1015/074.html The Catsouras' BAWWWW to Forbes about having to spend $3,000 on Reputation Defender]
*[http://www.forbes.com/forbes/2007/1015/074.html The Catsouras' BAWWWW to Forbes about having to spend $3,000 on Reputation Defender]
*[http://www.legacy.com/OrangeCounty/Obituaries.asp?Page=LifeStory&PersonID=19815656 Obituary]
*[http://www.legacy.com/OrangeCounty/Obituaries.asp?Page=LifeStory&PersonID=19815656 Obituary]
*[http://www.ocregister.com/articles/court-nikki-family-2490353-chp-images Case stemming from leak of grisly crash photos moves ahead]
*[https://www.ocregister.com/2009/07/10/case-stemming-from-leak-of-grisly-crash-photos-moves-ahead/ Case stemming from leak of grisly crash photos moves ahead]
*[https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/17537298 Nikki Catsouras] at [[Find a Grave]]
*{{twitter|deadnikki}} {{archive|M0Oci}} Some dumbfuck from this site made a fake Twitter account
*[https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/vanessa-bryant-leaked-photos-kobe-b1977437.html The Kobe Connection]
*Crash site coordinates:[https://virtualglobetrotting.com/map/nikki-catsouras-accident-site-31-oct-2006/][https://wikimapia.org/19668629/Toll-booth-site-of-fatal-car-crash]
*Court Documents:
**Catsouras v. Department of California Highway Patrol [https://casetext.com/case/catsouras-v-dept-of-cal][https://casetext.com/case/catsouras-v-department-of-california-highway-patrol]
**[https://casetext.com/case/catsouras-v-reich Catsouras v. Reich]
**[https://casetext.com/case/mayo-v-odonnell Mayo v. O'Donnell] (Even Nikki's real father is getting in on the action)
*Nikki Catsouras [[Soundcloud]] Tracks
**{{Soundcloud |}} [https://soundcloud.com/rovebeats/nikkicatsourasfreestyle Nikki Catsouras Freestyle (PROD. ROVE)]
**{{Soundcloud |}} [https://soundcloud.com/ayran-zombrex/benedict-siray-dopravni-krasy-nikki-catsouras-2018 Benédict Sirày - Dopravní Krásy (Nikki Catsouras) (2018)]
**{{Soundcloud |}} [https://soundcloud.com/toricore_404/mindfuck-kketamine mindfuck +kketamine]
**{{Soundcloud |}} [https://soundcloud.com/sadboigoyard/nikki-catsouras-remix-prod-httpssoundcloudcomsadboigoyardthis-was-on-when-nikki-catsouras-crashed-da-porscheremxis-estxhwlvdobinsadboigoyardsetsthe-garage-tapes-goyard-xs-id5vaowivdssi94664ac35dcb4d75904a75a4014b88d7utm_sourceclip NIKKI CATSOURAS REMIX (G.S.B. X CRIZZY WHITE)PROD BY SUZUKKI]
 


==See also==
*[[Ferrari Guy]]
*[[Nick Hogan]]
*[[Ogrish.com]]
*[[Porsche Boy]]
*[[Reputation Defender]]
*[[Rob Levin]]
*[[View My Death]]
{{anheroes}}
{{anheroes}}
{{whores}}
{{Dying Alone}}


[[Category:People|Catsouras, Nikki]][[Category:IRL Shit]][[Category:Internets Phenomena]] [[Category:Drama-generating techniques]][[Category:2006]]
[[Category:People|Catsouras, Nikki]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]
[[Category:Internets Phenomena]]
[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]
[[Category:2006]]
[[Category:Corpses]]
{{timeline|Featured article January 23 & 24, [[2018]]|[[The Great ED Civil War of 2018]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Chelsea Manning]]}}

Latest revision as of 02:56, 8 March 2024

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Nikki Catsouras: A waste of a good vagina.

Nicole "Nikki" Catsouras (a.k.a. Porsche Girl, Nearly Headless Nikki and The Headless Porschewoman of Lake Forest California) was an 18-year-old whore who proved, yet again, that women can't drive. On Halloween 2006, Nikki decided to steal her father's $150,000 Porsche 911 and take it for a drive; she was later found deader than fuck with traces of cocaine in her system. According to her mother, Nikki had an inoperable brain tumor that caused her to have a severe psychotic reaction to the drug, resulting in her hitting another car and subsequently barrel rolling into a concrete tollbooth at approximately 100 mph. In typical emo "no one understands me" drama, she became one with a toll booth on highway 241, her head smashed to bits. Concerned internet citizens rushed to inform the family.

Legends say that Nikki's restless spirit still travels the roads of Orange County, California in the form of a modern Dullahan driving a ghostly Phantom Porsche and often asks toll booth attendants if they'd be willing to give her head and/or cocaine.

Nikki Lives!!

Put the top down, Nikki! That's a bit too much off the top sis.
   
“ 		 
People are sick.
  		„
  		 

—Christos Catsouras, BAWWWWW

However, two California Highway Patrol investigators, Aaron Reich and Thomas O'Donnell, leaked the photos which naturally were posted to the internet. O'Donnell claimed that he only emailed the photos to himself for viewing at a later time, while Reich admitted to sending the photos to four people. "Internet hackers," quite possibly under the influence of steroids, immediately started sending the pictures to as many of Nikki's friends and relatives as possible. Some of these messages even arrived during her funeral. Ironically, Nikki was actually going to college to study photography. What a twist of fate!

Nikki's parents have blown $3,000 on hiring Reputation Defender in a successful attempt to waste $3,000. However, they are to date unsuccessful in their attempt to remove all copies of the fappable pics of their daughter from the internets. Don't they know that if it's on the internet, it never goes away? Dumbasses.

On May 14, 2009, in an attempt to milk even moar money out of the Catsourasses, Reputation Defender set up a web site called "A Tribute To Nikki Catsouras" (Wayback Machine), that asked people to report all instances of the post-crash pics of Nikki, and requests that any one who has a web site with the images to "Please Remove These Photos From Your Web Site." No word on how many ED admins passed out laughing at said request. As of February, 2012, Reputation Defender redirected the Nikki Catsouras "tribute" to their own website.

Some admins were, however, willing to consider it, in exchange for pix of Catsouras daughter tits (which is very fair by internet standards). Their offers were refused.

 
“ 		 
As a father I would never let my daughter take cocaine and drive off like your daughter. I hope you become better parents after this and stop trying to censor the internet. May God be with you.
  		„
 

— Richard C. Mongler, supportnikki.org Guestbook

GTFO N00bs

According to multiple news sources, the Catsourasses (or at least those who still have faces) no longer use the internet. Nikki's parents have pulled their living daughter from school because they fear other students might confront her with the pictures. Anonymous has taken their actions as a challenge, and plans to erect a billboard bearing the images outside the girl's bedroom window.

There is also a campaign to start geocaching at her burial site, located in Pacific View Memorial Park, Corona Del Mar (ugly white trash/soccer-mom filled shithole in Orange County), CA.

Gallery

Before

  • Oh nooes my head is going to hit this wall
    Oh nooes my head is going to hit this wall
  • Graduating from driver's ed
    Graduating from driver's ed
  • Nikki's Jew family.
    Nikki's Jew family.
  • As close as you can get without your eyes watering
    As close as you can get without your eyes watering
  • I can get closer
    I can get closer
  • Her mugshot from an alternate timeline where she got arrested for reckless driving
    Her mugshot from an alternate timeline where she got arrested for reckless driving

After

  • The aftermath of a barrel roll.
    The aftermath of a barrel roll.
  • How do I crashed Porsche? Answer: Hopped up on coke
    How do I crashed Porsche?
    Answer: Hopped up on coke
  • I just took an ounce of cocaine, dare me to drive?
    I just took an ounce of cocaine, dare me to drive?
  • You can clearly see the tumor here
    You can clearly see the tumor here
  • Lucky officer given the honor of picking Nikki's skull out of the pavement.
    Lucky officer given the honor of picking Nikki's skull out of the pavement.
  • Put car on head
    Put car on head
  • I'd still hit it.
    I'd still hit it.
  • Porsche Girl's face was found intact! (Not her, retard)
    Porsche Girl's face was found intact! (Not her, retard)
  • The person she hit before quitting irl
    The person she hit before quitting irl
  • The sniper's POV
    The sniper's POV
  • Coordinates in the external links section
    Coordinates in the external links section
  • If /b/tards had had their way, the memorial would have looked something like this.
    If /b/tards had had their way, the memorial would have looked something like this.

The Internet Reacts

Video Gallery

Some retard tried to contact her ghost

It seems that Logan Paul didn't learn his lesson about putting dead bodies on YouTube

A wizard visits her grave

The wizard's follow-up video

She's alive!

Dr. Phil sends his viewers out on a scavenger hunt to find the photos

Previous Video | Next Video

Crash Simulations

A high quality reconstruction of the event

TOO SOON

Somebody actually put effort in this one

This one is one of the more accurate ones

Boy, people sure do like making these

Another one? STOP POSTING

You just can't stop the internet. The Catsourases had to learn that the hard way.

Previous Video | Next Video

KA-CHING!

Thomas O'Donnell, one of the CHP's trolls who took the photos.

Shocked and Appalled, Nikki's parents concluded that a good lolsuit would put an end to the harassment. They filed a lolsuit against the state for "emotional and punitive damages"; discounting the cost of the written-off Porsche, a replacement Porsche, and the overall cost of raising their daughter, that comes to about $19 million in profit. The lolsuit is currently pending dismissed. appealed. remanded settled for $2.37 million dollars.

   
“ 		 
One of the dispatchers, Thomas O'Donnell, was reprimanded and disciplined but not fired.The other dispatcher, Aaron Reich, resigned for reasons he said were unrelated to the leaked pictures.
  		„
  		 

—Sounds legit

Standard White Knightery

   
“ 		 
Ur a dumb dick 4 saying these things about Nikki, when u die i'm gonna laugh my ASS OFF ASS HOLE!!! it's not good news that she is dead u Disgusting pig, Why don't u go materbate or somthing. and that hurt alot of people, her best friend, her family, her boy friend, and u think she is a total waste of vagina, ur a total waste, of living so, why dont u just kill ur self now and do EVERYONE A HUGE FAVOR U DISGUSTING UGLY FUCKING DICK!!!!
  		„
  		 

—A white knight defending a dead girl he wants to fuck

Porsche Girl: The Book

You see, after Nikki's untimely death, her mother, Lesli Catsouras, began writing an epic novel with the aim of turning her daughter's misadventure into a New York Times bestseller. After almost half a decade of doodling around in her notebook, she finally decided to release the long awaited thriller along with a promotional website and Facebook page.

Take a look at an archived version of the site here.

 Associated Facebook page

Some bonus materials in the book include samples of quotes from some of the lulziest trolls at the beginning of each chapter.

You can read the book here on the Internet archive! (Need to make an account tho)

Or here's the PDF if ur too lazy to make one.

A Selection of Cool Quotes

   
“ 		 
Wouldn’t it be cool, Mom, if I got famous someday, in some freaky, weird way?
  		„
  		 

—Nikki Catsouras (SOMEBODY PLEASE TELL HER) (Pg. 50)

   
“ 		 
Well, then, maybe you need to go down to the station with a gun and start shooting until you get some answers. Maybe then someone would help us!
  		„
  		 

—Lesli telling Christos to go apeshit (Pg. 138)

   
“ 		 
I slide my hand into the drawer, past the stationary and the paper clips, to the space above the wooden lathe where I hide my loaded gun. I let the palm of my hand brush against the cold, steel barrel and my mind races ahead. Suddenly, I’m not feeling the pain of everything I've lost, but a sense of justice and satisfaction as I grip the piece.
  		„
  		 

—Christos? (Pg. 244)

   
“ 		 
Slowly, and carefully, I pull the gun toward my body, letting revenge course through my veins like a drug. It’s a total rush. For the next few minutes, I just sit and listen to the fiery sounds of my own heart pounding, and relish the sense of need — and power and validation — that I am feeling. I almost don't care if I go to jail. I feel my eyes close and my finger slides against the trigger. My thumb — by its own will — presses down into place. I hear a sudden snap when my eyes pop open. I wonder if this dispatcher realizes that at any second I could walk right up to him and destroy his life just as recklessly and pathetically as he has destroyed mine. Because I am capable now of doing things I had never dreamed of doing before.
  		„
  		 

—CHIRSTOS CATSOURAS ALMOST WENT POSTAL (Pg. 245)

Previous Quote | Next Quote



UH-OH! It's not canon?

Based on a rather unfavorable review of the book, it seems that Lesli's account of Nikki may be more of a fanfic than a biography.

A Family Conspiracy

So Christos is actually Nikki's step-dad? Whaaaat?

In an incredible turn of events, we learn that Nicole Ellise Catsouras was actually born as Nicole Ellise Mayo. A Wikipedia user confirms this information in one of his edits to her article and claims that that is indeed the name printed on her death certificate. The more you know! Why the Catsourases chose to airbrush out the Mayos from the Porsche Girl franchise is still a mystery though. Maybe they wanted to spare them from the trolling? Maybe they wanted to keep all the prize money for themselves? Who knows.

UPDATE: It's confirmed that Christos is Nikki's stepfather in these court documents filed by her biological father Tony Mayo! The secret's out!


Nikki with her real dad, Tony Dean Mayo

Porsche Girl: The Movie?

Not really. Nikki's family clearly loves attention though, as they appeared for five minutes in this documentary, "Lo and Behold, Reveries of the Connected World," on the tenth year anniversary of her death. They went from Dr. Phil to the big screen. Impressive! If you'd like, you can watch it for free on Tubi and Plex right now. They appear around the 28 minute mark. Hey, Elon Musk is in it too!


The Catsourases a decade later. The kids have no idea where to look lol.
   
“ 		 
I have always believed that the internet is a manifestation of the anti-Christ.
  		„
  		 

—Lesli Catsouras

2021: Still in the News?

We reached 2021. COVID has ripped our world apart. ED has died and was revived via necromancy for the 1,000th time. And somehow, the Catsourases are still relevant. In their latest cameo appearance, they insert themselves into the Kobe Bryant helicopter crash arc, hoping to ally themselves with Vanessa Bryant who is fighting to keep the Basketball-American's death photos from being leaked online. Perhaps the Catsourases believed that if they could get a famous figure like Ms. Bryant on their side, they could finally get their "Right to be forgotten" law in the bag. Three years later though, and nothing seems to have come from it.

Moral of teh story

Concrete > Car

Drug > Booze

Dead Daughter = $$$

Our anon friends have conjured a magical formula to... produce heroine!

Cocaine + Driving = Heroine

Booze + Driving = Also Hero

So if you don't want to be ze Hero, don't do drugs kids! You cannot get vaginas if you are deader than fuck!

Legal Disclaimer: Meme status and cash is not guaranteed upon death.


Extras

Chat Transcript

One of Nikki's friends uploaded a transcript of an instant messaging conversation to her blog after she died:


[-+]Chat with Nikki 

Nikki Catsouras = PlieSexSiielking.


zerosanddones: Hey.
PlieSexSiielking: hey
zerosanddones: I got your message. But I didnt have time to write back.
11:55 PM
zerosanddones: I just thought it was unfair.
zerosanddones: Im clean.
zerosanddones: And I have stopped using.
PlieSexSiielking: im sorry if you see it that way but with everything thats been going on, more than you even. not just with drugs but for my well being
zerosanddones: I know.
zerosanddones: I jsut thought we could maybe stay clean together
PlieSexSiielking: you think you do but you have no idea
zerosanddones: And help each other.
PlieSexSiielking: im fine keeping clean, its been fun for me
12:00 AM
zerosanddones: I like being sober too.
zerosanddones: But Im not understanding..
zerosanddones: You don't want to see me anymore although I'm clean, and you're clean?
PlieSexSiielking: correct, like i said before its much more than you will understand
PlieSexSiielking: im sorry
zerosanddones: Can you tell me so I can understand?
PlieSexSiielking: we come from differents worlds
PlieSexSiielking: i come from outerspace
zerosanddones: Nikki.
PlieSexSiielking: no really
12:05 AM
PlieSexSiielking: maybe
PlieSexSiielking: who knows
PlieSexSiielking: but
PlieSexSiielking: its an understanding you will only recieve in a different life time
PlieSexSiielking: a different life
PlieSexSiielking: and if you dont understand that, well.. you will in a different life
zerosanddones: Nikki, you know Im a pretty understanding person.
zerosanddones: I am grasping in what you're saying.
zerosanddones: But it doesn't make sence.
PlieSexSiielking: i know you are liz, and youve been really good and true to me and i thank you for that
zerosanddones: You told me something like this when you were on acid.
PlieSexSiielking: hah
12:10 AM
PlieSexSiielking: did you know i walked up a hill for twenty minutes barefoot on acid
PlieSexSiielking: and at the top of the hill i sat on the ground next to one coutch filled with people
PlieSexSiielking: i felt sad that night
zerosanddones: Yes.
PlieSexSiielking: and walked up a little further to the mood
PlieSexSiielking: moon
PlieSexSiielking: and could feel jesus
zerosanddones: But you never told me why you were sad.
zerosanddones: I know that you're a depressive person.
zerosanddones: Did Jesus say anything to you?
PlieSexSiielking: no, i was sad because i was alone on acid
zerosanddones: Remember that Leah and I were also on acid that night and we went to your house and rang the doorbell, knocked on doors and windows for 30 minutes?
12:15 AM
zerosanddones: We wanted to rescue you.
zerosanddones: And be with you.
PlieSexSiielking: that was sweet
zerosanddones: We sware, we had the thought that Julien was corrupting you. In a way, it was true.
zerosanddones: Then I had a complete feeling of failure that I had lost you. (because you didn't come out of your house)
PlieSexSiielking: you tripped me out, i dint know it was you
zerosanddones: Haha well. its acid!
PlieSexSiielking: true that
12:30 AM
zerosanddones: What do you do all the time now?
zerosanndones: Am I getting anywhere even? A slight understanding?
12:40 AM
zerosanddones: OK there might be more. I can get that.
12:55 AM
PlieSexSiielking has gone offline.


Transcript recovered from findadeathforum.com (archive)


This is so sad im gonna criii :'(

From this conversation, we can see that Nikki's drug problem was much greater than originally thought. Coke AND acid? Oh Nikki, what were you thinking?

On a side note, her username appears to have came from the song "Pliesex Sielking" by Dntel. The song sounds like an acid trip, so it's quite fitting.



Song her sister made for her


Danielle also made Nikki and their deceased grandmother another song titled "Angels" that was posted on her Myspace eons ago, but you know how broken that site is now.

You can at least look at it

Another level of irony

If you actually read the acknowledgements of the book, you would know that Lesli's father is Dick Simon. As it turns out, Dick Simon was actually a famous race car driver back in his day with his very own page on TOW! (See here) This means that our dear Nikki was the granddaughter of a professional! Clearly, the gene that holds the driving skills have skipped a generation...

For further confirmation, here is his Failbook. Notice how he is friends with both Lesli and Christos, and all the racing-related posts:

 Dick Simon

New Website

After the collapse of the aforementioned foreverexposed.com, Nikki's mother made another website to promote her other books. Don't worry though! Nikki's book is still featured heavily on this new site. Like the previous site, she failed to pay the rent and the site is now booted out of existence and only lives on through the power of the great Wayback Machine.

Archive of Lesli's new site

Various Facebook accounts for the curious

Some freak (not me) has been recording ALL of Nikki's family's Facebook accounts and other sensitive info. On top of that, he records all this information in one of the weirdest formats possible: an archive of a Google search. No, really. See them here:

Protip: Paste the whole thing into a doc for easier reading.

See also

GOODNIGHT, SWEET PRINCESS!


RIP IN PEPPERONIS:

  • So cash - AKA Paulie Carbone, a meme who went splat in a car accident just a year after Nikki
  • Nick Hogan - Crashed his car a year after Nikki but SURVIVED
  • Porsche Boy - Less interesting male counterpart
  • Rob Levin - Got ka-chow'd by car a month before Nikki


Also,

  • Reputation Defender - Waged a war against the internet to try and get the photos taken down
  • Streisand Effect - The real villain of this story
  • Ferrari Guy - Another person associated with a car (didn't crash tho)
  • Ogrish.com - An ancient gore site that morphed into LiveLeak the same day Nikki got pwned
  • View My Death - A tribute site & internet forum where people can discuss DEATH
  • John Earnest - Committed a synagogue shooting and mosque burning session just an hour away

External Links

Porsche Girl
is part of a series on
An Heroes

[iPod][Xbox]
Died Alone

1-14 Jakarta Attacks • Aaron Bushnell • Aaron Howard • Aaron Swartz • AcidChan • Adam Lanza • Adolf Hitler • Akbarzhon Dzhalilov • Alan Turing • Alexis Pilkington • Amanda Todd • An Halo • Andrea Pignani • Andrew Kehoe • Andrew Koenig • Anthony Warner • Anton Lundin Pettersson • Artyom Kazantsev • Asa Coon • August Ames • Ben Vodden • Bob8466 • Brandon Clegg • Brandon Crisp • Brandon Hole • Brenda Williams • Brigit Gonzalez • Broadt Ledet • Bruce Pardo • Bubba Copeland • Budd Dwyer • Candyjunkie • Arcan Cetin • Charles Bishop • Charmaine Dragun • Chloe Sagal • Chris Benoit • Chris Dorner • Christine Chubbuck • Christopher Foster • Chris Harper-Mercer • Cho Seung-Hui • Clay Duke • Codey Porter • David Ritcheson • Derrick Bird • Devin Kelley • Dustin Michaels • Dylan Klebold • Elliot Rodger • Emma Jones • Eric Harris • Etika • Euler Grandolpho • George Hennard • George Sodini • Gizgiz • Gleb Korablev • Hannah Bond • Heath Ledger • Hunter S. Thompson • Israel Keyes • Jake Roberts • James Leshkevich • Jarrad Willis • Jaylen Fryberg • Jeff Weise • Jenny Grant • JewWario • Jiverly Voong • Jodie Gater and Stephanie Gestier • Joe Stack • John Houser • Jonathan Kendrick Lewis • José Betts • Jürgen Conings • Kevin Neil Whitrick • Klerck • Kurt Cobain • Leelah Alcorn • Livecorpse • Lowtax • Matthias Schoormann • Mario Ferreyra • Marvin Heemeyer • McSkillet • Megan Meier • Mercedes Herrera • Mia Janin • Mitchell Henderson • Mr. Hands • Matti Saari • Josh Ballard • Nathaniel Berhow • Nghtmrchld26 • Nikita Lytkin • Nikki Catsouras • OldDirtyBtard • Otoya Yamaguchi • Panya Khamrab • Paula Goodspeed • Pekka-Eric Auvinen • Petri Gerdt • Philip Markoff • Quentin Hubbard • Rachele Rudd • Rehtaeh Parsons • Ricardo Lopez • Richard Jeni • Rina Palenkova • Robert Card • Robert Hawkins • Robin Williams • Ronnie McNutt • Rudolph Zurick • Ryan Palmeter • Sadie Davila • Salman Abedi • Sam Leeson • Shane Halligan • Shaun Dykes • Shawn Woolley • Shay • Shuaiby • Sol Pais • Stephanie Michelle Brown • Stephen Kazmierczak • Stephen Huff • Stephen Paddock • Stiletto one • Tang Yongming • Tatiana the Tiger • Terry Davis • The An Heroes of Bridgend • Tim Kretschmer • Timothy Hendron • Tony48219 • Tyler Clementi • Tyler Dumstorf • Tyler Peterson • Verne Troyer • William Atchison

Failures

Adf-fuensalida • Ahuviya Harel • Alek Minassian • Amber Buttrum • Amy Bishop • Anton Bichivin • Ariana Raykotto • Audrey Hale • Aydin Paladin • Bernie Madoff • Brandon Clark • Brenda Spencer • Brian Clyde • Brian Connors • Brook Higgins • Campo Delgado • Charles Ziese • Cobanermani456 • Colonel McBadass • Crystal Shinkle • David Gray • DeWayne Craddock • Dimitrios Pagourtzis • Dmitry Vinogradov • Dylann Roof • Gabe Parker • George Stinney • Hugo Jackson • Ilnaz Galyaviev • Imma-The-Deer • Jakrapanth Thomma • James Huberty • Jameth • Jarrod Ramos • Jeffree Moon • Jessica Evert • Jonathan Ross • Joseph Camp • Justin-anon • Lindsay Souvannarath • Lolo Ferrari • Mamoru Takuma • Martin Bryant • Mary Bell • Michael Carneal • Michael Gimson • Missy • Mychal Bell • Neogrant • Nikkineko333 • Nikolas Cruz • Noah Esbensen • NuzzieKoma • Owen Wilson • Pikacat39 • PogoRoo • RainBoy107 • Richard Reid • Randan Fontaine • Rex Fowler • Robert Crimo • Robert Long • Salvador Ramos • Shaan Singh • Shinji Aoba • Sienna Johnson • Sirtom93 • Sneakylizard • Stephen Fry • TakeShotAction • Timur Bekmansurov • TJ Lane • Toaster Steve • Tom Preston • TooDamnFilthy • Tumbles the Stairdragon • Viper

Related Pages

90 Day Jane • An hero day • ask.fm • Autoerotic asphyxiation • Columbine • Golden iPod • Heaven's Gate • High Score • How to become an hero • Jeffrey Epstein • Mydeathspace • Pseudocide • Shotgun mouthwash • Suicide • Suicidal Failure • The Great Sonic-cide of 2007 • Threatening suicide • Virginia Tech massacre • Waco

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Porsche Girl is part of a series on Dying Alone

[DeadCry yourself to sleep]

Those Who Have Died Alone

Aaron Alexis ☠ Aaron Bushnell ☠ Aaron Swartz ☠ Adam Lanza ☠ Alexis Arquette ☠ Amanda Todd ☠ Amy Winehouse ☠ Anal Cunt ☠ Andy Kaufman ☠ Angry Grandpa ☠ Anna Nicole Smith ☠ Anthony Warner ☠ Asa Coon ☠ Brian Adams ☠ Brandon Crisp ☠ Byuu ☠ Charmaine Dragun ☠ Cho Seung-Hui ☠ Chris Benoit ☠ Chris Harper-Mercer ☠ Chyna ☠ Codey Porter ☠ David Bowie ☠ David Carradine ☠ Dragoneer ☠ Eazy-E ☠ Edarem ☠ Elliot Rodger ☠ Elvis Presley ☠ George Sodini ☠ Gizgiz ☠ Gleb Korablev ☠ HappyCabbie ☠ Harambe ☠ H.P. Lovecraft ☠ Heath Ledger ☠ Jake Davison ☠ Jeff Weise ☠ JewWario ☠ Jim Morrison ☠ Kate Spade ☠ Kitty0706 ☠ Kurt Cobain ☠ Lemonade Coyote ☠ Leelah Alcorn ☠ Lil Peep ☠ Lilo ☠ Loki Blackfang ☠ Lowtax ☠ Mia Janin ☠ Megan Meier ☠ Michael Jackson ☠ Mitchell Henderson ☠ MySpace ☠ Nathan Gale ☠ Nikita Lytkin ☠ Otoya Yamaguchi ☠ Pekka-Eric Auvinen ☠ Prince ☠ Randy Stair ☠ Rehtaeh Parsons ☠ Ricardo Lopez ☠ Rina Palenkova ☠ Ripper ☠ Robin Williams ☠ Ronnie McNutt ☠ Rudolph Zurick ☠ Ryan Palmeter ☠ Shawn Woolley ☠ Shay ☠ Shuaiby ☠ Sol Pais ☠ Stephen Paddock ☠ Steve Stephens ☠ Thomas Matthew Crooks ☠ Tony48219 ☠ TooDamnFilthy ☠ Tyler Dumstorf ☠ Vester Flanagan ☠ William Atchison ☠ XXXTentacion ☠ Zhao Zewei

Those Dying Alone

03bgood ☠ 2cash ☠ 2 gryphon ☠ 7jackass77 ☠ Adam Sandler ☠ Ahuviya Harel ☠ AIDS Skrillex ☠ AkewsticRockR ☠ Alex Ford ☠ Alison Rapp ☠ America's Third Party ☠ Amy Schumer ☠ Andrew Allanson ☠ Angry Joe ☠ AnimatedJames ☠ Anita Sarkeesian ☠ Anonymous Borg ☠ Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto ☠ Antony Aguilar ☠ April Davis ☠ Aquagirlwhitefox ☠ Argent009 ☠ Arguecat3 ☠ Arin Hanson ☠ Armake21 ☠ Asalieri ☠ Asher2500 ☠ Austin Alexander ☠ AvantGardePony ☠ Bambifan101 ☠ Barneyfag ☠ Basement Dwellers ☠ Ben Ford ☠ Ben Moynihan ☠ Benny_the_Snake ☠ Benthelooney ☠ Big Red ☠ Bikerfox ☠ Bill9929 ☠ Bill Gaede ☠ Bill Gates ☠ BLACKbusterCritic ☠ Bob Rehahn ☠ BrandontheMovieGuy ☠ Brandon Smith ☠ Brian Mueller ☠ Brian Richard Zaiger ☠ Brianna Wu ☠ Bronies ☠ ButLova ☠ ByAppointmentTo ☠ Carl the Cuck ☠ Cartoonjunkie ☠ Caseydecker ☠ CatboyKami ☠ Cheeyev ☠ Chloe Sagal ☠ Chris-chan ☠ Chris Crocker ☠ Chuck M. ☠ Clint of Rise and Fall ☠ CopperCab ☠ Corey Margera ☠ Coughlan666 ☠ Crazyvideosandrants ☠ Crinklemon ☠ Cyraxx ☠ Daniel Brandt ☠ Dan Cilley ☠ Dane Cook ☠ Dani Filth ☠ Darius McCollum ☠ Darknessthecurse ☠ DarksydePhil ☠ Dave Chapelle ☠ Dave Mustaine ☠ David Hockey ☠ Daxflame ☠ DBoyWheeler ☠ Deeker ☠ DeterminedToDrawUT ☠ Dev-catscratch ☠ DGTrixie ☠ Diaper Boy ☠ Dillon Cossey ☠ Diogo Mendes ☠ DisneyFan01 ☠ DisneyMaster ☠ DJ KEEMSTAR ☠ Dnepropetrovsk maniacs ☠ DodgerofZion ☠ Dogpatch Press ☠ Don Roberts ☠ Doodletones ☠ Doomer3868 ☠ Dorian_Gay ☠ Doug Walker ☠ Drakon ☠ DrossRotzank ☠ Doomentio ☠ Dustin ☠ EDP445 ☠ Emer Prevost ☠ Emos ☠ Epic Fat Guy ☠ EpicKitty54 ☠ Eric Abramov ☠ Eric Ridenour ☠ Erik Ribsskog ☠ ErtasVideos ☠ Filthy Frank ☠ Fagolescents ☠ FanFic Critic ☠ Fast Eddie ☠ Fat Man ☠ Faust & Pory ☠ Five Nights at Freddy's fans ☠ Flardox ☠ Fluffy teh wolf ☠ ForeverKailyn ☠ Friends of A-Log ☠ Furries ☠ G-Zay ☠ Gather Against Fate ☠ George Lopez ☠ Geoshea ☠ Ghost ☠ Girlvinyl ☠ Globelamp ☠ GoddessMillenia ☠ Graykat ☠ Greg Mazujian ☠ Gwen Gale ☠ Gwen Stefani ☠ Harmful Opinions ☠ Hellkiller777 ☠ I Dislike Cis People ☠ I Hate Everything ☠ Ian Miles Cheong ☠ Ichverbot ☠ icze⁴r ☠ Imma-The-Deer ☠ InkBunny ☠ Isabella Loretta Janke ☠ Jamil The King ☠ Jessi Slaughter ☠ Jessica Leeds ☠ Jim Profit ☠ JINXDROWNED ☠ Joe Crusher Pickles ☠ Joeker ☠ John Bulla ☠ John Field ☠ John Kricfalusi ☠ John Patrick Rogers ☠ Jonathan McIntosh ☠ Jonmon ☠ JonTron ☠ Joseph Camp ☠ Joseph8276 ☠ Joshua "Null" Moon ☠ Juggalos ☠ JustinRPG ☠ Kat Dennings ☠ Kendall Jenner ☠ Keegan Salisbury ☠ Kathleen Todd ☠ Kenny Glenn ☠ Kevin Havens ☠ Keffals ☠ Kimmo Johan Alm ☠ KingEmpoleon ☠ KingMasterReview ☠ Krashed ☠ Laci Green ☠ Larry the Cable Guy ☠ Lauren Faust ☠ LeafyIsHere ☠ Lecarick ☠ Leigh Alexander ☠ LeisureSuitGaming ☠ Lena Dunham ☠ Leonard F. Shaner Jr. ☠ Leslie Jones ☠ LifeInATent ☠ Likeicare ☠ Linkara ☠ LittleCloud ☠ LittleKuriboh ☠ Logo Kids ☠ Lordelthibar ☠ Low Tier God ☠ Lucian Hodoboc ☠ M. Chaos ☠ A Man in Black ☠ Manchildren ☠ Mar9122 ☠ Marbles ☠ MarioMario456 ☠ Mariotehplumber ☠ Marjan Siklic ☠ masteroogwgay ☠ Matthew Davis ☠ Matthew Nicholson ☠ McJuggerNuggets ☠ MDetector5‎ ☠ Meowbark ☠ MeganSpeaks ☠ Michael Batton ☠ Michael Fitzhywel ☠ Michael Gimson ☠ Mike Sandy ☠ Moleman9000 ☠ Monica Punk ☠ MonkeyGameGuides ☠ Moviebob ☠ Mumkey Jones ☠ MuZemike ☠ MylarBalloonFan ☠ MysteriousMrEnter ☠ MysticArk ☠ NaokoElric2250 ☠ NawlinWiki ☠ Neckbeards ☠ NeoGAF ☠ Nick Bate ☠ Nick Bravo ☠ Nikkineko333 ☠ Noah Antwiler ☠ Nostalgia Chick ☠ Notch ☠ Nullcherri ☠ Objectfags ☠ OFWGKTA ☠ Onideus Mad Hatter ☠ Onyx Forepaw ☠ Pacificoceanasia ☠ PaigeGirl ☠ Paul Feig ☠ Paulie Calafiore ☠ Parkourdude91 ☠ Peter Bright ☠ Peter Coffin ☠ PhantomStrider8 ☠ Phil Fish ☠ PhunWithLogic ☠ Pinkiepony ☠ Pit Viper ☠ Pixyteri ☠ Peluchin Entertainment ☠ PMRants ☠ Preachingthegospel ☠ Quentin Tarantino ☠ Rachael MacFarlane ☠ Randi Harper ☠ Richard Reid ☠ Ricki Raven ☠ RMG Productions ☠ Robert Stainton ☠ Robert Wayne Stiles ☠ Rockosocko ☠ Romeo Rose ☠ Rootbrian ☠ Rose3212 ☠ Ryan Routh ☠ Sad Frog ☠ SammyClassicSonicFan ☠ Sam Pepper ☠ Sarah Butts ☠ Sarahisnifty ☠ SaturnDOS ☠ Sceptre ☠ Schnookums ☠ Segacamp ☠ Sega Kid ☠ Seth MacFarlane ☠ Sethisto ☠ Shadman ☠ Simply Okami ☠ Slowbeef & Diabetus ☠ Snapesnogger ☠ Sonic Savior ☠ Sonmanic ☠ Sony-Mae ☠ Sophie Labelle ☠ Spax3 ☠ Stormy ☠ Superlisamcb ☠ Susan Boyle ☠ Tara Strong ☠ TheAmazingAtheist ☠ TheDOSFag ☠ TheSockDetective ☠ Tim Buckley ☠ TJ Lane ☠ Todd in the Shadows ☠ Tom Preston ☠ ToonEGuy ☠ Tourneyfags ☠ Trey Eric Sesler ☠ Trigglypuff ☠ Tyciol ☠ Tyler Garmany ☠ Ulillillia ☠ The Unknown Autobot ☠ Vade ☠ VinceintheBay ☠ Wade Fulp ☠ WeatherManKevin ☠ Wesley!!! ☠ WoWfan4life ☠ Wwwarea ☠ Weegeeisgoingtokillm ☠ Xenuria ☠ YandereDev ☠ Yoshiwii1 ☠ You ☠ youngbloodfantasy91 ☠ Zoe Quinn ☠ Zone

Their Methods

9gag ☠ Adventure Time ☠ An Hero ☠ AIDS ☠ Animu ☠ Alt-right ☠ Art School ☠ A-Log's Fanfiction ☠ ask.fm ☠ Asperger's Syndrome ☠ Assigned Male ☠ Bath Salts ☠ The Big Bang Theory ☠ Battle For Dream Island ☠ BlackLivesMatter ☠ Black metal ☠ Body Pillows ☠ BonziWORLD ☠ BitView ☠ Booze ☠ Bullying ☠ BuzzFeed ☠ Children's Cartoons ☠ Clown World ☠ Computer Science III ☠ Cosplay ☠ CumOnPrintedPics.Com ☠ Cuphead ☠ Dead Friend ☠ Death metal ☠ Death penalty ☠ Dating Sims ☠ DeviantART ☠ Discord ☠ Drugs ☠ Edginess ☠ Family Guy ☠ FanFiction ☠ Feminism ☠ Fedora ☠ Fidget spinner ☠ The Filthy Frank Show ☠ Five Nights at Freddy's ☠ Fleshlight ☠ Friend Zone ☠ FurAffinity ☠ Furry Art ☠ Fun Shitposting Wiki ☠ Garry's Mod ☠ Genshin Impact ☠ GoAnimate! ☠ Googlewhacking ☠ Gorillaz ☠ Goths ☠ Gravity Falls ☠ Green Day ☠ Greeny Phatom ☠ Grindcore ☠ Hacking ☠ Happy Madison Productions ☠ Homestuck‎ ☠ Hover hand‎ ☠ Hufflepuff ☠ High Score ☠ Incelcore ☠ Indie music ☠ Infantilism ☠ Insane Clown Posse ☠ Introvert ☠ Invisible Girlfriend ☠ IRC ☠ Jenkem ☠ Kiwi Farms ☠ Kotaku ☠ League of Legends ☠ Lego ☠ Libertarianism ☠ LiveJournal ☠ Lonely ☠ LoveShy ☠ Mai Waifu ☠ Mass Shootings ☠ Men's rights activism ☠ Minecraft ☠ MLP Forums ☠ MMORPGs ☠ MGTOW ☠ MUDs ☠ My Little Pony ☠ My Tiny Dick ☠ Nice Guyism ☠ Nu metal ☠ Oculus Rift ☠ Oh Shiternet ☠ Online dating ☠ Online sex games ☠ Overwatch ☠ Plastic Crap ☠ Plenty of Fish ☠ /r9k/ ☠ Rick and Morty ☠ Roblox ☠ Rule 34 ☠ RuneScape ☠ School Shootings ☠ Second Life ☠ Self-Victimization ☠ Shy Boys IRL ☠ Silk Screen Goku Shirt ☠ Slayer ☠ Slipknot ☠ Sluthate ☠ Smogon University ☠ Social Justice ☠ Source Filmmaker ☠ South Park ☠ Sparkalloon ☠ Speakonia ☠ Star vs. the Forces of Evil ☠ Steven Universe ☠ Taking the Internet Too Seriously ☠ Team Fortress 2 ☠ That Guy With The Glasses ☠ The Anytown Show ☠ The Entersphere ☠ The Sims ☠ They Might Be Giants ☠ Tomb Raider ☠ Tool ☠ Transformers ☠ Tulpas ☠ Tumblr ☠ TV Tropes ☠ twenty one pilots ☠ Uncharted ☠ Uncle Grandpa ☠ Uncyclopedia ☠ Undertale ☠ Unikitty ☠ UTTP ☠ VidLii ☠ Virginity ☠ Virtual YouTubers ☠ Vloggerheads ☠ WatchMojo.com ☠ Weezer ☠ Wikimania ☠ Wizardchan ☠ World of Warcraft ☠ YIIK: A Post-Modern RPG ☠ YouTube

Featured article January 23 & 24, 2018
Preceded by
The Great ED Civil War of 2018 		Porsche Girl Succeeded by
Chelsea Manning
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