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Muammar Gaddafi: Difference between revisions
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[[Image:Gaddafi bitch.jpg|thumb|left|true that]] | [[Image:Gaddafi bitch.jpg|thumb|left|true that]] | ||
'''Muammar | '''Brotherly Leader and Guide of the Revolution Muammar Abu Minyar al-Gaddafi''' is perhaps one of the most insane [[Arab]]s since [[Saddam]]. He has ruled [[Cleveland|Libya]] since the [[At_least_100_years_ago|1970's]], but is now just short of [[An Hero]] status. He is best known for [[trolling]] [[NATO]] (especially [[The Jewnited States of Americunts]] and [[France]]), as well as trolling airplanes into exploding in the 80's. The butthurt rebels that are [[winning|losing]] to Gaddafi have conquered the capital Tripoli as of August 2011, so it's only a matter of time before the final [[pwned|defeat]] of Qaddafi. | ||
==Early Life== | ==Early Life== | ||
Revision as of 06:05, 4 September 2011
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Warning! We're allied with Al Quaida. We've always been allied with Al Quaida. |
Brotherly Leader and Guide of the Revolution Muammar Abu Minyar al-Gaddafi is perhaps one of the most insane Arabs since Saddam. He has ruled Libya since the 1970's, but is now just short of An Hero status. He is best known for trolling NATO (especially The Jewnited States of Americunts and France), as well as trolling airplanes into exploding in the 80's. The butthurt rebels that are losing to Gaddafi have conquered the capital Tripoli as of August 2011, so it's only a matter of time before the final defeat of Qaddafi.
Early Life
Muammar al-Gaddafi (not to be confused with Myuran Sukumaran, the convicted Australian drug smuggler) was spawned from the hairy arse of a camel in a Bedouin tent in the desert, near Squirt, in 1942. His family belongs to a small tribe of Arabized Bourbon. The Qaddadfa (which is Arabic for 'I kill you') are stock herders with holdings in the Hun Oasis, which they stole from the Germans during World War II.
He was then subject to years of rape and beatings at the military academy, mainly at the hands of an American tutor known only as 'Ronald,' which may be the cause of his extreme butthurt toward all things 'Murka. The academy was located at Bengazi, which ironically is now the rebel stronghold.
After his studies in Libya, he pursued further studies in Eurabia. The rumors circulating that he studied at the Royal Military Academy Sandhurst are entirely true. The Academy denies this, however, as they don't want Prince Harry to think he went to the same school as a sandnigger.
Rise To Power and Going Mad With Pow(d)er
Muammar Gaddafi's reign began Over 9000 years ago when he pwned Hasan as-Senussi.
On 1 September 1969, a small group of junior military officers led by Gaddafi staged a bloodless (except for some anal hemorrhaging) coup d'etat against King ShitPiss while he was in Turkey for medical treatment, having his anus resleaved. Following a troublesome acquisition of some small boys in Morocco, his nephew, the Crown Prince Sayyid Hoi-sin ar-Rider Al-kyder ass-S-anus-si, had been formally deposed by the revolutionary army officers and put under house arrest; they abolished the monarchy and proclaimed the new Great Libyan Socialist People's Republic Gaddafi - the Libyan dictator savior!
After attempting to export his shitty revolution to the Arab countries around him in 1977, Gaddafi decided it would be best to bomb some huts across the border in Egypt. When that failed to elicit a response, he decided it would be a good idea to then order his troops and tanks to drive across the border, which quickly turned into a sandy reenactment of the battle of France.
When Egypt ordered thirty times the amount of troops Gaddafi sent across the border to blitzkrieg into Libya and hang Gaddafi from a lamppost, the Israeli Jews saw how Egypt killing a majorly anti-American dictator would make them lose funding from Washington, quickly bribed Arab representatives to suck Egypt's dick to get them to place the troops they diverted to invade Libya back on their side of the border. It was unclear how they could tell where the fucking border is, as the whole place is a desert shithole.
After this utter failure, Gaddafi decided to instead declare himself the king of Africa and promptly invaded Chad to expand his now pan-African ideology to the French niggers to the south of him. After over a decade of on and off war, France got sick of Gaddafi's shit and sent troops and tanks to Chad to kickban him, but the troops got distracted by a JewTube video of a 13 year old girl singing about Friday, and are thought to be fapping somewhere in the desert still, assuming they didn't forget to drink while fapping, leading to death from dehydration. After failing to spread his revolution by invasion, he decided to do shit the western way, and started to murder his own people and blaming others for it, as the one thing he grudgingly admired about America was their ability to make dissenters vanish properly and not having their bodies turn up in a hotel room somewhere in eastern Europe with a shoddy two-tap in the base of the brain. His antics caught the eye of comedian Bill Cosby and they became best friends.
There are no rebels
The truth is that in reality, there are only about 10 rebels. The "footage" you see on television is all stock from about six months ago, and the only reason NATO is trying to take over his country is because of the oil. Kenya, for example, has been even worse for even longer, yet nobody gives a shit about them because they have no oil. However, because Libya has oil, as soon as a couple of people rebelled, NATO jump on it like a bandwagon. If you look, you'll see the vast majority of Libya residents thoroughly like Gaddafi, or don't really care. This is proved by interviews and crowd support featured on news programs closer to the area of Libya.
Civil War and Military intervention in 2011
After this blunder, Al Qaeda thought it would be better to send some African niggers to "rebel" a bit, which made Libyans everywhere in the country who otherwise didn't give a fuck over the fact that fundamentalists were given power over them promptly half half the country to start protesting on both sides (pro-Gaddafi and anti). Soon after, the rebels broke into armories and declared "AK-47's for everybody!" in typical Muslim fashion, at which point Gaddafi met with his supporters and told them to "Take these weapons and fucking kill everyone who does not love me!" and he almost did! In less than over a week, he launched a counter-offensive and took the upper hand. Western faggots, seeing their plan is about to fail, decided to lobby protocol 1973 which is a code for "let's bomb the shit out of Libya and overthrow Gaddafi by helping the batshit insane rebels". The only nations to oppose this humanitarian intervention were Russia (because Putin was busy hunting British agents) and China (because they don't need the oil to pwn America's economy). With government armor, aircraft, and weaponry being bombed by NATO, the rebels consolidated their hold on the eastern half of the country, after which there was a stalemate with slow gains. Recently, as of August 2011, the rebels have conquered the capital city Tripoli, and stand poised to defeat the final boss and beat the game.
The REAL motives for the intervention:
- Get the sandnigger gold to sell it for jew gold
- Testing armament in advance for WW3
- Try to show off to the world by bombing a defenseless country in the middle of a civil war hoping that will make forget your embarrassing defeats in the past
It's remarkable to note that France (!!!) was very furious about saving Libya when we all know that Frenchies are forfeiting faggots, but it was actually up to Sarkozy.
Hiding in a zoo
After rebels invaded his house,and instead to surrender like a fucktard,gadaffi decided to be a smartass and go into hiding,which ended up being in a zoo with furries.experts expect that he will soon be sucking his thumb and saying "mommy"
Moral of the story
Never trust a backstabbing Jew president Sarkozy, who will betray you after you help him financially at elections.
Actual quotes by Gaddafi
- "Democracy means permanent rule".
- "There is no state with a democracy except Libya on the whole planet".
- "All African nations look up to Libya, all the rulers of the world look up to Libya".
- "I am not such a dictator that I would shut down Facebook. I'll merely imprison anyone who logs into it".
- "A woman has the right to run for election whether she's male or female".
- "Were it not for electricity, we would have to watch television in the dark".
- "Obeying your parents is more important than doing as your parents say".
- "Protest however you want, but do not go out onto the streets and squares".
External links
- Serbians support Gaddafi, why don't you?
- A letter from Gaddafi to the world, read it at your own risk
