James Foley

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I neknominate you!

James Wright Foley was an American journalist formerly employed by the GlobalPost, Agence France-Presse and Stars and Stripes who is currently working as a horror movie prop and bowling ball. While stationed in Syria he was abducted by US-backed terrorist group the FSA and given to ISIS. US commandos tried to rescue Foley but unfortunately he was beheaded before they could shoot him.

Career

Pre-beheading Foley worked as a propagandist for the US government, writing for such imperialist and jingoistic shitrags such as Stars and Stripes which openly opines that the spoiled welfare queens and war criminals in the US military aren't getting enough benefits for murdering a million people in Iraq.

He was also a famous pro-wrestler.

“	The Stars and Stripes used illustrations to communicate ideas, especially those aimed at justifying military goals and encouraging the troops' adherence to the war effort. . . . In many cases, the images selected by the editors would be considered propaganda by today's standards. . . . Besides expressing editorial opinion, cartoons entertained the troops, offering them humorous stories and images that satirized everyday life in the military.	„
— The origins of Stars and Stripes - The US Library of Congress [1]

At the time of his death he was working for GlobalPost for whom he wrote many biased classics, such as this one covering US soldiers in Afghanistan:

“	It always amazes me how brave these guys are. But I’m a civilian with no previous military experience. Not only are these guys used to taking fire several times a week, they have leaders – soldiers who have had more than one deployment and performed under many horrific, mind-boggling conditions. One yell or decisive action from such a leader can make all the difference in how the younger soldiers act and ultimately ensure the safety of the entire patrol. (...) I find I often have trouble leaving a unit even if I spend only a week with them. These guys would easily risk their own lives to save mine. They are mostly young kids compared to me, and they share everything from sweets they got from their mom to swapping photos and videos.	„
— James Foley - Wondering if he can suck their army dicks now that Don't Ask Don't Tell has been repealed [2]

Capture

Not the time to lose one's head. That's not the way to get ahead in life. It's a shame he wasn't more headstrong. He'll never be the head of a major corporation.

Remember the Free Syrian Army? The American puppet terrorist group trying to overthrow the democratically elected[3] government of Bashar Al-Assad in Syria? The same terrorist group that Obama sent half a billion dollars to, armed and trained [4]? Guess who they kidnapped? Lol.

“	According to Syrian sources who have worked previously to locate and rescue kidnapped journalists in Syria, American journalist James Foley, who was beheaded by Islamic State in a video the militant group made public on Tuesday, was most likely used by another guerrilla group as a token of allegiance to ISIS. According to those sources, Foley was in the hands of the Dawood Bridgade, a group that was originally aligned with relatively moderate opposition groups such as the Free Syrian Army, but recently pledged allegiance to ISIS.	„
— Whoops! [5]

Beheading

The British killer doesn't observe proper untensil etiquette by holding the knife in his right hand. We can ascertain from this that he would not be welcome at a high class dinner party

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Motive

Like 9/11, 7/7 and almost every Islamic terrorist attack you can think of, this was retaliation for American foreign policy. As the killer explains:

“	This is James Wright Foley, an American citizen of your country. As a government you have been at the forefront of aggression towards the Islamic State. You have plotted against us and gone far out of your way to find reasons to interfere in our affairs. Your strikes have cause casualties among Muslims. You’re no longer fighting an insurgency. We are an Islamic army and a state that has been accepted by a large number of Muslims worldwide. So effectively, any aggression toward the Islamic State is an aggression toward Muslims of all walks of life who have accepted the Islamic caliphate as their leadership. So any attempt by you, Obama, to deny Muslims their right of living in safety under the Islamic caliphate will result in the bloodshed of your people.	„
— Captain Obvious [6]

Sequel

Halp.

Unaired footage

Steven Joel Sotloff, an American journalist who has written for TIME and the Christian Science Monitor, kidnapped in Syria in August 2013 makes a cameo appearance at the end of the video. The masked killer, who from this point forward we'll refer to as Jason Voorhees, implies that the man's life will be spared if Obama stops bombing Islamic State.

So, we'll have another beheading video next week then.

See Also

• Terrorist
• Islam
• Defense Industries Organization
• Iraq
• Afghanistan
• Hugh Jidette
• Israel
• ISIS
• United States

External Links

• Watch James Foley get his head chopped off on Liveleak

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