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Nicki Minaj

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One is a pile of shit that has been decorated to stand out from its surroundings, despite it still being a pile of shit. The other is a turd covered in sprinkles.

Nicki Minaj is a batshit crazy, over-privileged, plastic nigress who is consistently given hundreds of millions of dollars for absolutely no other reason other than being a puppet of the entertainment industry, while you live off of instant ramen, lonely masturbation and amphetamines working double shifts at the local KFC. This abomination of a human being is the product of Sheneequa really wanting to rip off Lady GaGa's style, but without being able to muster up even the meager, infinitesimal amount of talent necessary to "sing" while wearing a meat dress on stage, so as to appear artistic, flamboyant and expressive to uneducated Americunts.

Nicki Minaj, also known as the love child of a coon, a cat and a smashed bottle, is a so-called "artist" who can't sing, dance or even stay upright without her fat ass attracting other planets via gravitational pull. She is mostly known for contributing towards the complete destruction of music, the brainwashing of children, and just about everyone with an IQ above 70 losing faith in humanity. She also thinks that haters make her famous, which shows that she is very dumb, since they make you infamous. She thinks that infamy and fame are the same thing and because of that she mentionz the people who despise her everywhere. It looks like she's never heard of Blood on the Dance Floor. Did we mention this poser bitch is a "music artist"?

Appearance

Like how shit comes in many colors,sizes and smells so does Nicki Minaj. Most notably, her skin has lightened over the years, due to skin lighteners such as Hydroquinone and her sheer desire to become White, and her obvious inner inferiority complex. In her quest to become White, she's attempted rhinoplasties that makes Owen Wilson cringe, in order to decrease the monstrous nose so common with her race. What now remains is a laughable botched nose job. It is not used for function, nor aesthetics. Only for copious amounts of coke use. With the appearance of a fat troll, her body fat along with everyone else's has been directly accumulated in her ass. During a medical biopsy in search of the cancer that ultimately is herself, it was discovered that in her ass contained large volumes of fatty tissue,voided self-respect,implants and sperm. Her ass has reportedly been prone to 'leakage' and may in fact, have once ruptured. Her eyes are feral and vapid, much like her many personalities.

Nicki the Brat

It's a known fact that all celebrities are ungrateful, pig-headed pricks, but Nicki Minaj takes this assholery to a whole new level: she treats her simpleton fans like total horse-shit. She has even at one point admonished her fans to kill themselves (we ain't complaining) after cancelling her concerts in Ireland despite so many fantards already buying tickets. As much as this angered many it was a very lulzy incident with butthurt beyond belief masses of Minaj cultists bawing and crying until blood poured from their glitter-splattered eyes. [1]

It is also a little known fact that Nicki Minaj uses her psychotic split personality Roman, to control the supple minds of Niggers all over the world via her ass implants. Using the powers of Kumbaya, Nicki will help to make this nation even more fucking retarded than it already is.

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Featured article September 17 & September 18, 2021
Preceded by
Norm MacDonald
Nicki Minaj Succeeded by
Timur Bekmansurov