- Portals
- The Current Year
- ED in the News
- Admins
- Help ED Rebuild
- Archive
- ED Bookmarklet
- Donate Bitcoin
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.
Campinas Cathedral Shooting
|
| |
|---|---|
| Euler Fernando Grandolpho | |
| Born | March 8, 1969 |
| Died | December 11, 2018 (aged 49) |
| Nationality: | Brazilian 
|
| Highscore | Killed 5, injured 3 |
| Top 50? | No |
| Style | Single player |
| An Hero? | Hell yeah |
Euler Fernando Grandolpho was a depressed loner, batshit insane schizo, and a dipshit Brazilian sand nigger who attempted to go for the high score in Monkeyland held by Genildo Ferreira de França who has held the high score in the country for 27 years with a kill count of 14!
Background
Grandolpho (born March 8th 1969) was a 49 year-old systems analyst who had a history of mental illness and had been treated for depression in the past and had been living with his oldfag parents. He had a brief stint working as an assistant for the prosecutor in Sao Paulo. But at the time he was out of work (Yes we know it said he was a systems analyst but other sources say otherwise!) and still depressed with his life, and so eventually, he purchased a pistol and revolver and began to think people were stalking him and began writing down random strangers license plates because he's batshit crazy, and also kept a diary (Even though he's a grown ass fucking man) where he wrote irrational and delusional thoughts and rants.
Loadout
| Class Setup | |
|---|---|
| Item | Accessories/Bonus |
 |
|
 |
|
 |
|
 |
|
Shooting
It was a happy, lovely, warm, winters day on December 11th 2018 when Euler decides to go out to lunch with his family at 1:00 P.M, probably eating disgusting, gross-ass, generic, monkey-mongrel food. Then after lunch, he decides to go to afternoon mass, like any other God-fearing, sinless, bible-worshipping, Jesus-loving Christian would. So he arrives for church 20 minutes later, and goes to sit on a pew to pray and worship The Lord our God. But, during his prayers to please help him get the fuck out of his parents house and find him a girlfriend and a new job like the worthless, useless cunt he was, he suddenly felt the power of Satan ravaging through his body and so he went from being "He wuz a good boi!!!1" to harvesting the will and determination like Dylann Roof doing whatever it takes to start a race war and the atheistic, Pekka-Eric Auvinen-type, Matthew Murray-style hatred of organized religion and realizes his life wasn't worth shit, and so weren't others. So he takes his 2, definitely legally-obtained handguns and unleashes the wrath of Satan towards any christfag he sees (Which there weren't many of btw). About a few minutes after the first shots, white-mongrel police enter the building and bus' sum' caps n' is' ass! Euler, wounded, then runs to an altar where inexplicably, his demonic possession spell wears off and he realizes he's been hit in the side and bleeding in pain and sees what "he" has "done" Seeing how the pigs are approaching him to decides to turn the lights off, where he is now in hell burning for eternity for not repenting.
Aftermath
The evil spirit that took over Euler and is responsible for this tragedy managed to kill 4 christards instantly and injure 4 others. A fifth christard died the next day, lulz ensued with some thinking Eulers and Chérif Chekatt's shooting in france were connected somehow, which obviously weren't.
Gallery
- caption
-
-
-
His batshit crazy writings -
Some "art" he made
Gameplay Footage
Graded Score
Wanted Level:
___________________
|
|
___________________
|
Police Force
| Graded score | |
|---|---|
| Kill count: | 5/20 3 Injured |
| Accuracy: | 16/20 |
| Style: | 9/20 Shooting spree after lunch |
| Butthurt: | 10/20 Campinas mayor BAWWWWWW'd on Twitter, Brazil's version of Charleston, and Sutherland Springs |
| Bonus: | 1/20 Attempted high score and failed miserably |
| Total score: 41/100 (F-) | |
See Also
- Matthew Murray - Another church shooter who failed miserably
- High Score - What he tried to go for
- Brazil - Where shit went down
|
Campinas Cathedral Shooting |
||||||||
|
[Xbox]
|
||||||||
| Locus in quo: |
Abilene Alleyway Shooting 🔫 Capital Gazette Shooting 🔫 Chris Dorner 🔫 Christchurch mosque attacks 🔫 Colorado Theatre Shooting 🔫 David Long 🔫 Dayton shooting 🔫 El Paso Walmart Shooting 🔫 Elliot Rodger 🔫 Gilroy Garlic Festival Shooting 🔫 Jacksonville Shooting 🔫 Kyle Rittenhouse 🔫 Marjory Stoneman Douglas School Shooting 🔫 Pulse Nightclub Massacre 🔫 Randy Stair 🔫 San Bernardino shooting 🔫 Sandniggers in Paris 🔫 Sandy Hook Elementary Massacre 🔫 Santa Fe High School Shooting 🔫 Shoahdown at the Synagogue of Doom 🔫 Las Vegas shooting 🔫 Texas church shooting 🔫 Umpqua Community College Shooting 🔫 Virginia Beach Shooting 🔫 Washington Navy Yard shooting 🔫 Youtube shooting 🔫 |
|---|---|
| Supporters |
Barack Obama 🔫 Christians 🔫 Concerned Mothers 🔫 Democrats 🔫 Dianne Feinstein 🔫 Government 🔫 The Kennedys 🔫 Kurt Eichenwald 🔫 Faggots 🔫 Liberals 🔫 Michael Bloomberg 🔫 Jews 🔫 SJWs 🔫 Sensitive people 🔫 Tara Strong 🔫 Trayvon Martin 🔫 Quinton Reviews |
| Main ideas: |
Assault Rifle 🔫 Gun 🔫 Gun Control 🔫 Murder 🔫 Arson 🔫 Bombs 🔫 Mass Shooting 🔫 School Shooting 🔫 |
| Haters gonna hate: | |
| Acts of revenge: |
Boston Marathon Bombing 🔫 Sandniggers in Paris 🔫 Ariana Grande Massacre 🔫 London Bridge Attack 2017 🔫 Capital Gazette Shooting |
| Objectors: |
Charlton Heston 🔫 James Holmes 🔫 NRA 🔫 Osama Bin Laden 🔫 Republicans 🔫 People planning a massacre 🔫 |
| Pre-2012 Gun Massacres |
Columbine 🔫 École Polytechnique 🔫 Dawson College 🔫 Virginia Tech Massacre 🔫 Austin, Texas 🔫 NIU Valentine's Day Massacre 🔫 Hungerford Massacre 🔫 Anders Breivik |
