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{| style="background: #F8F8FF; border: 2px solid #8888AA; width: 50%; margin: 5px auto; border-radius: 10px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; -webkit-border-radius: 10px; -khtml-border-radius: 10px; -icab-border-radius: 10px; -o-border-radius: 10px;"
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|width="1%" style="padding-right:1em;"|[[File:Lightbulb.png|50px]]
|width="1%" style="padding-right:1em;"|[[File:Lightbulb.png|50px]]
|'''[[EDiots]] have translated this article'''<br>'''into the following obscure language(s):'''
-
|[[File:Denmark Flag.gif|40px|link=MylarBalloonFan/Danish|Danish]] [[MylarBalloonFan/Danish|Danish]]
|{{{text|
-
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'''[[EDiots]] have translated this article''' <br> '''into the following obscure languages:'''  
-
| [[File:Denmark Flag.gif|40px]] [[MylarBalloonFan/Danish|Danish]]
-
|}
|}


It may come as a surprise to some that anyone over the age of 8 would have an obsession with foil balloons; however, some people never outgrow such childish things. '''MylarBalloonFan''' A.K.A. [[Powerword|Samuel “Sammy” Petersen]] or Sam Asp Glassen is a [[fat]], 22 year-old [[basement dweller]] born 12th of August 1991.  who is obsessed with [[Balloon Fetish|Mylar balloons]], old technology, square objects, [[McDonalds]], the [[1990s]], and [[Sailor Moon]]. He is also an [[autistic]] [[Denmark|Dane]] who hates his own country for various stupid reasons. Sammy also is something of an Ameriboo and wants to move to the [[USA]]. However, due to Sammy spending his [[welfare]] money on other things, he won’t be touching [[American]] soil anytime soon. Also to no surprise he is a fat fuck. Clocking in at only 170 centimeters tall, he weighs a staggering [http://www.motion-online.dk/sundhed_og_vaegt/fedtprocent/beregn_dit_body_mass_index_-_bmi/ 87 kilos]. (5'7" and 191 pounds for imperialists)
It may come as a surprise to some that anyone over the age of 8 would have an obsession with foil balloons; however, some people never outgrow such childish things. '''MylarBalloonFan''' AKA [[Powerword|Samuel "Sammy" Petersen]] or Sam Asp Glassen (born on 12 August 1991) is a [[fat]], 30 year-old [[basement dweller]] who is obsessed with [[Balloon Fetish|Mylar balloons]], old technology, square objects, [[McDonalds|American]] [[Mountain Dew|junk food]], the [[1990s]], shitty [[techno]] music, and [[Bratz]]. He is also an [[autistic]] [[Denmark|Dane]] who hates his own country for various stupid reasons. Sammy also is something of an Ameriboo and wants to move to the [[USA]]. However, due to Sammy spending his [[welfare]] money on other things, he won’t be touching [[American]] soil anytime soon. Also to no surprise he is a fat fuck. Clocking in at only 170 centimeters tall, he weighs a staggering [http://www.motion-online.dk/sundhed_og_vaegt/fedtprocent/beregn_dit_body_mass_index_-_bmi/ 87 kilos]. (5'7" and 191 pounds for imperialists)


== Mylar Balloons ==
== Mylar Balloons ==


[[File:Sammy masturbating with balloons.png|thumb|right|Sammy telling the internet about how he masturbates with balloons]]
[[Image:Sammy masturbating with balloons.png|thumb|Sammy telling the internet about how he masturbates with balloons]]
Samuel has an intense love for Mylar Balloons. So much so, that he has [[Over 9000|over 200]] of them in his room. Due to [[Denmark|Køge]] not having very many places that sell Mylar Balloons, Samuel has to import them from the US. He spends at least 200 USD for one Mylar balloon and has spent over 5000 USD on Mylar balloons. Yes, he spends 200 dollars to import a shitty balloon that costs 7 dollars at Party City.


He expresses his love for Mylar balloons on Yahoo answers and [[Youtube]]. He comments regularly on videos of other Mylar balloon spergs that videotape themselves and their balloons. He also posts [[U mad?|negative]] comments to anyone that uploads videos of themselves popping his favorite type of balloons. In his own words; anyone who pops Mylar balloons is “killing his girlfriend.”
Samuel has an intense love for Mylar Balloons. So much so, that he has [[Over 9000|over 200]] of them in his room. Due to [[Denmark|Køge]] not having very many places that sell Mylar Balloons, Samuel has to import them from the US. He spends at least 200 USD for one Mylar balloon and has spent over 5000 USD on Mylar balloons. Yes, he spends 200 dollars to import a shitty balloon that costs 7 dollars at Party City.
 
He expresses his love for Mylar balloons on Yahoo answers and [[Youtube]]. He comments regularly on videos of other Mylar balloon spergs that videotape themselves and their balloons. He also posts [[U mad?|negative]] comments to anyone that uploads videos of themselves popping his favorite type of balloons. In his own words: anyone who pops Mylar balloons is "killing his girlfriend".


Yes, Samuel has a sexual fetish for Mylar balloons. It’s not enough for Samuel to own Mylar balloons; he also has sex with them and admits that Mylar balloons feels good against his microdick on Yahoo answers without any shame. He even videotaped himself slobbering all over a Mermaid balloon. [http://videobam.com/fMBWE You can watch the video here.]  
Yes, Samuel has a sexual fetish for Mylar balloons. It’s not enough for Samuel to own Mylar balloons; he also has sex with them and admits that Mylar balloons feels good against his microdick on Yahoo answers without any shame. He even videotaped himself slobbering all over a Mermaid balloon. [http://videobam.com/fMBWE You can watch the video here.]  


As an avid Mylar balloon fan, he hates the dreaded latex balloons with a passion. He posts [[tl;dr|long]] rant videos about how much he despises them and of him flipping off latex balloons at a store. He even popped latex balloons in a couple of [http://videobam.com/ueqhZ videos].  
As an avid Mylar balloon fan, he hates the dreaded latex balloons with a passion. He posts [[TL;DW|long]] rant videos about how much he despises them and of him flipping off latex balloons at a store. He even popped latex balloons in a couple of [http://videobam.com/ueqhZ videos].  


<center>
<center>
{{morphquote|morphquote1|background-color: white;width:100%;|font-weight:bold;
{{morphquote|morphquote1|background-color: white;width:100%;|font-weight:bold;
|MYLAR MAKES MY PENIS WET WITH JOY IF YOU HATE MYLAR YOU SHOULD BE KILLED MYLAR BALLOONS IS SEXIER THAN DIRTY HIPPYS AND HUMANS|
|MYLAR MAKES MY PENIS WET WITH JOY IF YOU HATE MYLAR YOU SHOULD BE KILLED MYLAR BALLOONS IS SEXIER THAN DIRTY HIPPYS AND HUMANS|
|when I see a Rubber Balloon I becomes angry and want to shot the latex balloon but I am very happy when I see a Mylar Foil Balloon. to me Latex Balloons are fake and Mylar is real balloons.|
|When I see a Rubber Balloon I becomes angry and want to shot the latex balloon but I am very happy when I see a Mylar Foil Balloon. to me Latex Balloons are fake and Mylar is real balloons.|
|Mylar Balloons smell good and feel good on my penis.|
}}
}}
</center>
</center>


== He Loves the 90s ==
== He Loves the '90s ==
 
[[Image:Sammy autism coat.jpg|thumb|left|Sammy's 1990s cosplay, fanny pack and all]]
[[Image:Sammy Sailor Mars.jpg|thumb|''In the name of [[lolicon]], Mylar, and the 1990s, I shall punish you!'']]


[[File:Sammy autism coat.jpg|thumb|left|Sammy's 1990s cosplay, fanny pack and all]]
[[File:Sammy Sailor Mars.jpg|thumb|right|''In the name of [[lolicon]], Mylar, and the 1990s, I shall punish you!'']]
Sammy has other obsessions besides Mylar balloons that he spends quite a bit of his welfare check on. He is also obsessed with schoolgirl animu, old technology, squared objects, Dr. Pepper, and McDonalds. What these obsessions all share in Sammy’s autistic mind is their relationship to his favorite decade, the 1990s. Being born in 1991, Sammy is very nostalgic over his childhood. Unable to adjust to modern technology, Sammy despises the modern world and everything about it.
Sammy has other obsessions besides Mylar balloons that he spends quite a bit of his welfare check on. He is also obsessed with schoolgirl animu, old technology, squared objects, Dr. Pepper, and McDonalds. What these obsessions all share in Sammy’s autistic mind is their relationship to his favorite decade, the 1990s. Being born in 1991, Sammy is very nostalgic over his childhood. Unable to adjust to modern technology, Sammy despises the modern world and everything about it.


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{{clear}}
{{clear}}


==Herfølge Skole==
== He Loves the Early 2000s==
The autist also has an obsession with Herfølge Skole (Herfølge School), so much that he comments on every fucking thing on their Facebook page. In the Facebook group he proudly announces his hatred of anything new. <br /><br />
Recently Mylar has taken a bit of a plot twist. He now loves the early 2000s and sings their praises, expressing the opinion that 2000-2006 were the best years and everything after has been shit.
<i>Other Person: Even better library opening, now with school library.</i><br />
 
{{colortext|orange|Sammy: The old library was better more cosy this is way too modern and bright.}}<br />
== Herfølge Skole ==
<i>Another Person: I disagree. We have a wonderful library....</i><br />
 
{{colortext|orange|Sammy: Bright and modern is boring.}}<br />
The autist also has an obsession with Herfølge Skole (Herfølge School), so much that he comments on every fucking thing on their Facebook page. In the Facebook group he proudly announces his hatred of anything new.
<i>Another Person: I think our library brims with life and engagement - and I like brightness and air.</i><br />
 
{{colortext|orange|Sammy: Bright and modern makes me depressed.}}<br /><br />
''Other Person: Even better library opening, now with school library.''
He loves Herfølge school so much he even got one of their tables that he could use as a desk. <br />
<br>{{colortext|orange|Sammy: The old library was better more cosy this is way too modern and bright.}}
<center>[[File:Mylarballoonfan_Desk.jpg|400px]]<br />
<br>''Another Person: I disagree. We have a wonderful library...''
'''He uses it as his current computer desk'''<br /><br />
<br>{{colortext|orange|Sammy: Bright and modern is boring.}}
[[File:Mylarballoonfan_has_a_2003_computer.jpg]]<br />
<br>''Another Person: I think our library brims with life and engagement - and I like brightness and air.''
'''Where he proudly places his computer from 2003'''</center>
<br>{{colortext|orange|Sammy: Bright and modern makes me depressed.}}
<br>
<br>He loves Herfølge school so much he even got one of their tables that he could use as a desk.
<br><center>[[Image:Mylarballoonfan_Desk.jpg|400px]]
<br>'''He uses it as his current computer desk'''
<br>
<br>[[File:Mylarballoonfan_has_a_2003_computer.jpg]]
<br>'''Where he proudly places his computer from 2003'''</center>


== Bratz ==
== Bratz ==
Without exception, manchildren fap to cartoons for young girls.  [[Chris Chan|Some]] fap to [[Sailor Moon]]; [[Bronies|others]] fap to [[My Little Pony]].  For Mylar, the things that get his tiny dick hard are [[Bratz]], a line of dolls models from ugly [[guido]] [[prostitutes]].  Like a demented serial killer, he keeps a Bratz shrine in his room, loaded with creepy decapitated doll heads.


<center>
Without exception, manchildren fap to things meant for young girls.  [[Chris Chan|Some]] fap to [[Sailor Moon]]; [[Bronies|others]] fap to [[My Little Pony]].  The things that get Sammy's tiny dick hard are [[Bratz]], a line of dolls modeled from ugly [[guido]] [[prostitutes]].  He keeps a creepy Bratz shrine in his room, loaded with decapitated doll heads, like a serial killer proudly displaying his trophies.
 
{{center|
{{fv|youtubevids|background-color: #D7D7E0;|font-weight: bold;|
{{fv|youtubevids|background-color: #D7D7E0;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>3YyAcpJtFeY</youtube><center>'''My pretty!'''</center>|
<youtube>KfcoiXZM6Oc</youtube><center>'''My pretty!'''</center>|
<youtube>mQd2sEa1FhY</youtube><center>'''Mylar rubs this thing on his dick'''</center>|
<youtube>mQd2sEa1FhY</youtube><center>'''Mylar rubs this thing on his dick'''</center>|
<youtube>AirLE1fLPSs</youtube><center>'''First love'''</center>
<youtube>AirLE1fLPSs</youtube><center>'''First love'''</center>|
<youtube>WqqA-NoKXaM</youtube><center></center>|
<youtube>CYLAEUvtYtg</youtube><center>'''Buying a Barbie ballon to show his hate'''</center>
}}
}}
}}
</center>


He also has a hate-bonker on [[Barbie]], because Barbie is too old.
He also has a hate-bonker on [[Barbie]], because Barbie is too old.
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File:mylar2.png
File:mylar2.png
File:Mylar3.png
File:Mylar3.png
File:MermaidMylar.jpg|His favorite fuckbuddy.
File:StrawberryMylar.jpg|[[Pedophilia|He likes them young]].
</gallery>}}
</gallery>}}


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* [http://videobam.com/MCmMq Sammy complaining about going green]
* [http://videobam.com/MCmMq Sammy complaining about going green]


==DOX==
== External links ==
'''Sam himself'''<br />
{{colortext|red|'''Samuel Petersen''}}<br />
facebook:<br />
{{fb|Onpu99|Sam Pettersen}} - Another of his many names <br />


 
* {{fb|Onpu99|His Facebook}}
'''Mother:'''<br />
{{colortext|red|'''Liselotte Larsen.'''}}<br />
{{colortext|red|'''Kirkestræde 47'''}}<br />
{{colortext|red|'''4600 Køge'''}}<br />
Phone:<br />
+{{colortext|red|45 20 84 22 31}}<br />
Facebook:<br />
{{fb|liselotte.larsen.75|Hi mom}}
== Real life friends ==
* {{fb|jacob.olsen.750|Jacob Noize Olsen}} - Possibly not an autist
* {{fb|92weed|Leon Jeppeson (Jeppesen)}} - Autist
* {{fb|mette.jensen.1654|Mette Jensen}} - Nothing more than a friend, honest
* {{ytuser|ATITANIC1992|Alexander Wedø}} - Autist With a [[Elevator_Filming|hard-on for elevators]]


== See also ==
== See also ==
 
* [[Billoon45]]
* [[Balloon Fetish]]
* [[Balloon Fetish]]
* [[Bratz]]
* [[Bratz]]
Line 225: Line 209:
{{Dying alone}}
{{Dying alone}}
{{Aspies}}
{{Aspies}}
{{Lulcowboard}}
{{VidLii}}


{{Timeline|Featured article May 11 & 12, [[2013]]|[[Skullgirls]]|[[{{PAGENAME}}]]|[[Pirate]]}}
{{Timeline|Featured article May 11 & 12, [[2013]]|[[Skullgirls]]|[[{{PAGENAME}}]]|[[Pirate]]}}


[[Category:People]]
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:YouTube]]
[[Category:Abnormal Psych]]
[[Category:Abnormal Psych]]

Latest revision as of 20:26, 5 July 2022

Nobody has heard of this person, but whoever they are, vandalizing this article only makes us want to learn more...


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EDiots have translated this article
into the following obscure language(s): 		Danish Danish

It may come as a surprise to some that anyone over the age of 8 would have an obsession with foil balloons; however, some people never outgrow such childish things. MylarBalloonFan AKA Samuel "Sammy" Petersen or Sam Asp Glassen (born on 12 August 1991) is a fat, 30 year-old basement dweller who is obsessed with Mylar balloons, old technology, square objects, American junk food, the 1990s, shitty techno music, and Bratz. He is also an autistic Dane who hates his own country for various stupid reasons. Sammy also is something of an Ameriboo and wants to move to the USA. However, due to Sammy spending his welfare money on other things, he won’t be touching American soil anytime soon. Also to no surprise he is a fat fuck. Clocking in at only 170 centimeters tall, he weighs a staggering 87 kilos. (5'7" and 191 pounds for imperialists)

Mylar Balloons

Sammy telling the internet about how he masturbates with balloons

Samuel has an intense love for Mylar Balloons. So much so, that he has over 200 of them in his room. Due to Køge not having very many places that sell Mylar Balloons, Samuel has to import them from the US. He spends at least 200 USD for one Mylar balloon and has spent over 5000 USD on Mylar balloons. Yes, he spends 200 dollars to import a shitty balloon that costs 7 dollars at Party City.

He expresses his love for Mylar balloons on Yahoo answers and Youtube. He comments regularly on videos of other Mylar balloon spergs that videotape themselves and their balloons. He also posts negative comments to anyone that uploads videos of themselves popping his favorite type of balloons. In his own words: anyone who pops Mylar balloons is "killing his girlfriend".

Yes, Samuel has a sexual fetish for Mylar balloons. It’s not enough for Samuel to own Mylar balloons; he also has sex with them and admits that Mylar balloons feels good against his microdick on Yahoo answers without any shame. He even videotaped himself slobbering all over a Mermaid balloon. You can watch the video here.

As an avid Mylar balloon fan, he hates the dreaded latex balloons with a passion. He posts long rant videos about how much he despises them and of him flipping off latex balloons at a store. He even popped latex balloons in a couple of videos.

   
“ 		 
MYLAR MAKES MY PENIS WET WITH JOY IF YOU HATE MYLAR YOU SHOULD BE KILLED MYLAR BALLOONS IS SEXIER THAN DIRTY HIPPYS AND HUMANS
  		„
  		 

   
“ 		 
When I see a Rubber Balloon I becomes angry and want to shot the latex balloon but I am very happy when I see a Mylar Foil Balloon. to me Latex Balloons are fake and Mylar is real balloons.
  		„
  		 

   
“ 		 
Mylar Balloons smell good and feel good on my penis.
  		„
  		 

Previous Quote | Next Quote

He Loves the '90s

Sammy's 1990s cosplay, fanny pack and all
In the name of lolicon, Mylar, and the 1990s, I shall punish you!

Sammy has other obsessions besides Mylar balloons that he spends quite a bit of his welfare check on. He is also obsessed with schoolgirl animu, old technology, squared objects, Dr. Pepper, and McDonalds. What these obsessions all share in Sammy’s autistic mind is their relationship to his favorite decade, the 1990s. Being born in 1991, Sammy is very nostalgic over his childhood. Unable to adjust to modern technology, Sammy despises the modern world and everything about it.

He’s obsessed with Sailor Moon and similar type school girl anime that came out in the 90s. He has spent quite a bit of money on animu little girl toys, Sailor Moon Mylar balloons, and other various animu crap. He even wore Sailor Mars cosplay and schoolgirl outfits in public, letting every single Dane in Køge know how special he is. He once made a top ten kawaii-est anime girl list and every single girl listed was younger than 16, some were even as young as eight years old. When viewers pointed out their age and asked him if he was a pedophile, Sammy raged at them.

His obsessions with ancient, pre-Web 1.0 technology include comfortable 1980s chairs, square electronics, and ancient computers. He also posts rants on his hatred for Windows Vista/7/8 and does not give a clear answer on why he dislikes them other than that they are modern computer systems. It’s also no surprise that Sammy likes 90s fashion (or, lack-thereof) and extremely bright, noisy, and generally annoying clothing. In every single one of his videos, he blasts Gabber techno for those who are unfortunate to listen. He also wears god awful 90s light-reflecting fashion that makes someone look like they lost a fight with a tub of highlighters. So far, his highlighter look consists of a New Kids on the Block fanny pack, a woman’s soccer jacket, and a girly watch. His fashion choices are interesting, to say the least. He chooses to wear the same type of stuff that women and effeminate gays wore in the 90s before quickly ditching them when they realized how retarded they looked. However, this should be expected from the same guy who wore schoolgirl outfits in public.

It can be assumed that he eats McDonalds on a weekly basis from the song his posted, the video of himself exiting out of one, and even his own comments about the franchise. He makes videos of himself obnoxiously burping on camera after drinking Dr. Pepper.

He Loves the Early 2000s

Recently Mylar has taken a bit of a plot twist. He now loves the early 2000s and sings their praises, expressing the opinion that 2000-2006 were the best years and everything after has been shit.

Herfølge Skole

The autist also has an obsession with Herfølge Skole (Herfølge School), so much that he comments on every fucking thing on their Facebook page. In the Facebook group he proudly announces his hatred of anything new.

Other Person: Even better library opening, now with school library.
Sammy: The old library was better more cosy this is way too modern and bright.
Another Person: I disagree. We have a wonderful library...
Sammy: Bright and modern is boring.
Another Person: I think our library brims with life and engagement - and I like brightness and air.
Sammy: Bright and modern makes me depressed.

He loves Herfølge school so much he even got one of their tables that he could use as a desk.



He uses it as his current computer desk


Where he proudly places his computer from 2003

Bratz

Without exception, manchildren fap to things meant for young girls. Some fap to Sailor Moon; others fap to My Little Pony. The things that get Sammy's tiny dick hard are Bratz, a line of dolls modeled from ugly guido prostitutes. He keeps a creepy Bratz shrine in his room, loaded with decapitated doll heads, like a serial killer proudly displaying his trophies.

My pretty!

Mylar rubs this thing on his dick

First love

Buying a Barbie ballon to show his hate

Previous Video | Next Video

He also has a hate-bonker on Barbie, because Barbie is too old.

Videos

Are you horny yet?

What he thinks about Latex Balloons

What he thinks about Ovals

Proud owner of a neon fannypack

One of many burp videos

Dr. Pecker: Approved!

$105 wasted on a worthless keyboard

Proudly displaying his cheap plastic crap

Previous Video | Next Video

Sammy and trolls

Sammy's response to this article.

Another response to this article, using South Park

Previous Video | Next Video

   
“ 		 
<stopthe60s> 888chan and ED are illegal
  		„
  		 

Getting mad at 789chan and people who compare him to Chris Chan

Sammy is very touchy when it comes to criticism and argues with trolls and people on and off youtube. Being discovered by 789chan users, Sammy quickly found his way to the site and raged at the users. So much so that he flagged down mirrors of his videos, sent trolls butthurt messages on Youtube, and made a couple of videos on Daily Motion.

He even, at one point, attempted to team up with Robert Wayne Stiles to get trolls arrested by the FBI. However, he quickly ditched Robb, because sending trolls to jail was taking time away from fucking his Mylar balloons. Isn't that awesome?

He also gets very irritated when trolls compared him to Chris Chan. Like Chris, he also wears out-of-date pedo glasses, likes Sailor Moon, eats at McDonalds almost religiously, is obsessed with toys, and even looks kind of like Chris. He even got referred to as "Danish Chris" by trolls before they found out his name. The main reason why he gets so butthurt when people compare him to Chris-chan is because Chris likes Pokemon and My Little Pony and that Chris is "too mainstream". Another thing that is true when comparing him to Chris-chan is that Sammy does not understand copyright law.

Another thing Sammy gets upset over is when people dislike his videos, whether they be trolls and/or people who didn't find his videos very entertaining. He also seems to believe that the same person disliked all of his videos rather than a few people finding them to be boring.

Like so many people before him, when he had found his ED article, he wanted to take the information down NOW NOW NOW!!!1 So he used the ED account that he already had and practically blanked the article. Needless to say, his edits were quickly reverted and he was banned.

Later he made a second account and a second attempt with the same results. He also made yet another attempt some time later, trying to turn his ED article into a vanity article, but was discovered and banned yet again.

Quotes

   
“ 		 
FUCK COCA COLA!!
  		„
  		 

—In response to an opinion on YouTube about soda[1]

   
“ 		 
I Don't like Coca Cola.
It just tastes boring.
Dr Pepper Tastes better.
I only Buy Dr Pepper.
1/5 stars given
  		„
  		 

—[2]

   
“ 		 
MYLAR BALLOONS FEELS GOOD AGAINST MY PENIS!
  		„
  		 

—lol[3]

   
“ 		 
I hate day light people that makes noice so I can't sleep.
  		„
  		 

—THE SUNLIGHT IT BURNS[4]

   
“ 		 
I have computers that are over 25 year old.

your modern china crap won't last that long. Fuck off!
 

„
  		 

—128KB RAM is best RAM[5]

   
“ 		 
you are a modern pieces of shit.
  		„
  		 

—nice grammar[6]

Previous Quote | Next Quote

Pictures

Balloon fucking and butthurt galore About missing Pics
  • Sammy's looking a little pregnant there...
    Sammy's looking a little pregnant there...
  • Sammy cosplaying as a Danish grandma.
    Sammy cosplaying as a Danish grandma.
  • Sammy picking up his daily rape victims.
    Sammy picking up his daily rape victims.
  • Sammy spending quality time with his balloons
    Sammy spending quality time with his balloons
  • The resemblance is uncanny!
    The resemblance is uncanny!
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]
  • Is it normal to get a boner from a balloon?'
    Is it normal to get a boner from a balloon?'
  • Sammy's rape-mobile.
    Sammy's rape-mobile.
  • Plastic crap and a shitty old computer? It's definitely Sammy's battle station.
    Plastic crap and a shitty old computer? It's definitely Sammy's battle station.
  • Complaining about people calling his glasses "rapist glasses."
    Complaining about people calling his glasses "rapist glasses."
  • So many posts about his assburgers syndrome.
    So many posts about his assburgers syndrome.
  • Sammy's arch-nemesis, skateboarders.
    Sammy's arch-nemesis, skateboarders.
  • His favorite fuckbuddy.
    His favorite fuckbuddy.
  • He likes them young.
    He likes them young.

Websites

External links

See also


MylarBalloonFan is part of a series on Dying Alone

[DeadCry yourself to sleep]

Those Who Have Died Alone

Aaron Alexis ☠ Aaron Bushnell ☠ Aaron Swartz ☠ Adam Lanza ☠ Alexis Arquette ☠ Amanda Todd ☠ Amy Winehouse ☠ Anal Cunt ☠ Andy Kaufman ☠ Angry Grandpa ☠ Anna Nicole Smith ☠ Anthony Warner ☠ Asa Coon ☠ Brian Adams ☠ Brandon Crisp ☠ Byuu ☠ Charmaine Dragun ☠ Cho Seung-Hui ☠ Chris Benoit ☠ Chris Harper-Mercer ☠ Chyna ☠ Codey Porter ☠ David Bowie ☠ David Carradine ☠ Dragoneer ☠ Eazy-E ☠ Edarem ☠ Elliot Rodger ☠ Elvis Presley ☠ George Sodini ☠ Gizgiz ☠ Gleb Korablev ☠ HappyCabbie ☠ Harambe ☠ H.P. Lovecraft ☠ Heath Ledger ☠ Jake Davison ☠ Jeff Weise ☠ JewWario ☠ Jim Morrison ☠ Kate Spade ☠ Kitty0706 ☠ Kurt Cobain ☠ Lemonade Coyote ☠ Leelah Alcorn ☠ Lil Peep ☠ Lilo ☠ Loki Blackfang ☠ Lowtax ☠ Mia Janin ☠ Megan Meier ☠ Michael Jackson ☠ Mitchell Henderson ☠ MySpace ☠ Nathan Gale ☠ Nikita Lytkin ☠ Otoya Yamaguchi ☠ Pekka-Eric Auvinen ☠ Prince ☠ Randy Stair ☠ Rehtaeh Parsons ☠ Ricardo Lopez ☠ Rina Palenkova ☠ Ripper ☠ Robin Williams ☠ Ronnie McNutt ☠ Rudolph Zurick ☠ Ryan Palmeter ☠ Shawn Woolley ☠ Shay ☠ Shuaiby ☠ Sol Pais ☠ Stephen Paddock ☠ Steve Stephens ☠ Thomas Matthew Crooks ☠ Tony48219 ☠ TooDamnFilthy ☠ Tyler Dumstorf ☠ Vester Flanagan ☠ William Atchison ☠ XXXTentacion ☠ Zhao Zewei

Those Dying Alone

03bgood ☠ 2cash ☠ 2 gryphon ☠ 7jackass77 ☠ Adam Sandler ☠ Ahuviya Harel ☠ AIDS Skrillex ☠ AkewsticRockR ☠ Alex Ford ☠ Alison Rapp ☠ America's Third Party ☠ Amy Schumer ☠ Andrew Allanson ☠ Angry Joe ☠ AnimatedJames ☠ Anita Sarkeesian ☠ Anonymous Borg ☠ Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto ☠ Antony Aguilar ☠ April Davis ☠ Aquagirlwhitefox ☠ Argent009 ☠ Arguecat3 ☠ Arin Hanson ☠ Armake21 ☠ Asalieri ☠ Asher2500 ☠ Austin Alexander ☠ AvantGardePony ☠ Bambifan101 ☠ Barneyfag ☠ Basement Dwellers ☠ Ben Ford ☠ Ben Moynihan ☠ Benny_the_Snake ☠ Benthelooney ☠ Big Red ☠ Bikerfox ☠ Bill9929 ☠ Bill Gaede ☠ Bill Gates ☠ BLACKbusterCritic ☠ Bob Rehahn ☠ BrandontheMovieGuy ☠ Brandon Smith ☠ Brian Mueller ☠ Brian Richard Zaiger ☠ Brianna Wu ☠ Bronies ☠ ButLova ☠ ByAppointmentTo ☠ Carl the Cuck ☠ Cartoonjunkie ☠ Caseydecker ☠ CatboyKami ☠ Cheeyev ☠ Chloe Sagal ☠ Chris-chan ☠ Chris Crocker ☠ Chuck M. ☠ Clint of Rise and Fall ☠ CopperCab ☠ Corey Margera ☠ Coughlan666 ☠ Crazyvideosandrants ☠ Crinklemon ☠ Cyraxx ☠ Daniel Brandt ☠ Dan Cilley ☠ Dane Cook ☠ Dani Filth ☠ Darius McCollum ☠ Darknessthecurse ☠ DarksydePhil ☠ Dave Chapelle ☠ Dave Mustaine ☠ David Hockey ☠ Daxflame ☠ DBoyWheeler ☠ Deeker ☠ DeterminedToDrawUT ☠ Dev-catscratch ☠ DGTrixie ☠ Diaper Boy ☠ Dillon Cossey ☠ Diogo Mendes ☠ DisneyFan01 ☠ DisneyMaster ☠ DJ KEEMSTAR ☠ Dnepropetrovsk maniacs ☠ DodgerofZion ☠ Dogpatch Press ☠ Don Roberts ☠ Doodletones ☠ Doomer3868 ☠ Dorian_Gay ☠ Doug Walker ☠ Drakon ☠ DrossRotzank ☠ Doomentio ☠ Dustin ☠ EDP445 ☠ Emer Prevost ☠ Emos ☠ Epic Fat Guy ☠ EpicKitty54 ☠ Eric Abramov ☠ Eric Ridenour ☠ Erik Ribsskog ☠ ErtasVideos ☠ Filthy Frank ☠ Fagolescents ☠ FanFic Critic ☠ Fast Eddie ☠ Fat Man ☠ Faust & Pory ☠ Five Nights at Freddy's fans ☠ Flardox ☠ Fluffy teh wolf ☠ ForeverKailyn ☠ Friends of A-Log ☠ Furries ☠ G-Zay ☠ Gather Against Fate ☠ George Lopez ☠ Geoshea ☠ Ghost ☠ Girlvinyl ☠ Globelamp ☠ GoddessMillenia ☠ Graykat ☠ Greg Mazujian ☠ Gwen Gale ☠ Gwen Stefani ☠ Harmful Opinions ☠ Hellkiller777 ☠ I Dislike Cis People ☠ I Hate Everything ☠ Ian Miles Cheong ☠ Ichverbot ☠ icze⁴r ☠ Imma-The-Deer ☠ InkBunny ☠ Isabella Loretta Janke ☠ Jamil The King ☠ Jessi Slaughter ☠ Jessica Leeds ☠ Jim Profit ☠ JINXDROWNED ☠ Joe Crusher Pickles ☠ Joeker ☠ John Bulla ☠ John Field ☠ John Kricfalusi ☠ John Patrick Rogers ☠ Jonathan McIntosh ☠ Jonmon ☠ JonTron ☠ Joseph Camp ☠ Joseph8276 ☠ Joshua "Null" Moon ☠ Juggalos ☠ JustinRPG ☠ Kat Dennings ☠ Kendall Jenner ☠ Keegan Salisbury ☠ Kathleen Todd ☠ Kenny Glenn ☠ Kevin Havens ☠ Keffals ☠ Kimmo Johan Alm ☠ KingEmpoleon ☠ KingMasterReview ☠ Krashed ☠ Laci Green ☠ Larry the Cable Guy ☠ Lauren Faust ☠ LeafyIsHere ☠ Lecarick ☠ Leigh Alexander ☠ LeisureSuitGaming ☠ Lena Dunham ☠ Leonard F. Shaner Jr. ☠ Leslie Jones ☠ LifeInATent ☠ Likeicare ☠ Linkara ☠ LittleCloud ☠ LittleKuriboh ☠ Logo Kids ☠ Lordelthibar ☠ Low Tier God ☠ Lucian Hodoboc ☠ M. Chaos ☠ A Man in Black ☠ Manchildren ☠ Mar9122 ☠ Marbles ☠ MarioMario456 ☠ Mariotehplumber ☠ Marjan Siklic ☠ masteroogwgay ☠ Matthew Davis ☠ Matthew Nicholson ☠ McJuggerNuggets ☠ MDetector5‎ ☠ Meowbark ☠ MeganSpeaks ☠ Michael Batton ☠ Michael Fitzhywel ☠ Michael Gimson ☠ Mike Sandy ☠ Moleman9000 ☠ Monica Punk ☠ MonkeyGameGuides ☠ Moviebob ☠ Mumkey Jones ☠ MuZemike ☠ MylarBalloonFan ☠ MysteriousMrEnter ☠ MysticArk ☠ NaokoElric2250 ☠ NawlinWiki ☠ Neckbeards ☠ NeoGAF ☠ Nick Bate ☠ Nick Bravo ☠ Nikkineko333 ☠ Noah Antwiler ☠ Nostalgia Chick ☠ Notch ☠ Nullcherri ☠ Objectfags ☠ OFWGKTA ☠ Onideus Mad Hatter ☠ Onyx Forepaw ☠ Pacificoceanasia ☠ PaigeGirl ☠ Paul Feig ☠ Paulie Calafiore ☠ Parkourdude91 ☠ Peter Bright ☠ Peter Coffin ☠ PhantomStrider8 ☠ Phil Fish ☠ PhunWithLogic ☠ Pinkiepony ☠ Pit Viper ☠ Pixyteri ☠ Peluchin Entertainment ☠ PMRants ☠ Preachingthegospel ☠ Quentin Tarantino ☠ Rachael MacFarlane ☠ Randi Harper ☠ Richard Reid ☠ Ricki Raven ☠ RMG Productions ☠ Robert Stainton ☠ Robert Wayne Stiles ☠ Rockosocko ☠ Romeo Rose ☠ Rootbrian ☠ Rose3212 ☠ Ryan Routh ☠ Sad Frog ☠ SammyClassicSonicFan ☠ Sam Pepper ☠ Sarah Butts ☠ Sarahisnifty ☠ SaturnDOS ☠ Sceptre ☠ Schnookums ☠ Segacamp ☠ Sega Kid ☠ Seth MacFarlane ☠ Sethisto ☠ Shadman ☠ Simply Okami ☠ Slowbeef & Diabetus ☠ Snapesnogger ☠ Sonic Savior ☠ Sonmanic ☠ Sony-Mae ☠ Sophie Labelle ☠ Spax3 ☠ Stormy ☠ Superlisamcb ☠ Susan Boyle ☠ Tara Strong ☠ TheAmazingAtheist ☠ TheDOSFag ☠ TheSockDetective ☠ Tim Buckley ☠ TJ Lane ☠ Todd in the Shadows ☠ Tom Preston ☠ ToonEGuy ☠ Tourneyfags ☠ Trey Eric Sesler ☠ Trigglypuff ☠ Tyciol ☠ Tyler Garmany ☠ Ulillillia ☠ The Unknown Autobot ☠ Vade ☠ VinceintheBay ☠ Wade Fulp ☠ WeatherManKevin ☠ Wesley!!! ☠ WoWfan4life ☠ Wwwarea ☠ Weegeeisgoingtokillm ☠ Xenuria ☠ YandereDev ☠ Yoshiwii1 ☠ You ☠ youngbloodfantasy91 ☠ Zoe Quinn ☠ Zone

Their Methods

9gag ☠ Adventure Time ☠ An Hero ☠ AIDS ☠ Animu ☠ Alt-right ☠ Art School ☠ A-Log's Fanfiction ☠ ask.fm ☠ Asperger's Syndrome ☠ Assigned Male ☠ Bath Salts ☠ The Big Bang Theory ☠ Battle For Dream Island ☠ BlackLivesMatter ☠ Black metal ☠ Body Pillows ☠ BonziWORLD ☠ BitView ☠ Booze ☠ Bullying ☠ BuzzFeed ☠ Children's Cartoons ☠ Clown World ☠ Computer Science III ☠ Cosplay ☠ CumOnPrintedPics.Com ☠ Cuphead ☠ Dead Friend ☠ Death metal ☠ Death penalty ☠ Dating Sims ☠ DeviantART ☠ Discord ☠ Drugs ☠ Edginess ☠ Family Guy ☠ FanFiction ☠ Feminism ☠ Fedora ☠ Fidget spinner ☠ The Filthy Frank Show ☠ Five Nights at Freddy's ☠ Fleshlight ☠ Friend Zone ☠ FurAffinity ☠ Furry Art ☠ Fun Shitposting Wiki ☠ Garry's Mod ☠ Genshin Impact ☠ GoAnimate! ☠ Googlewhacking ☠ Gorillaz ☠ Goths ☠ Gravity Falls ☠ Green Day ☠ Greeny Phatom ☠ Grindcore ☠ Hacking ☠ Happy Madison Productions ☠ Homestuck‎ ☠ Hover hand‎ ☠ Hufflepuff ☠ High Score ☠ Incelcore ☠ Indie music ☠ Infantilism ☠ Insane Clown Posse ☠ Introvert ☠ Invisible Girlfriend ☠ IRC ☠ Jenkem ☠ Kiwi Farms ☠ Kotaku ☠ League of Legends ☠ Lego ☠ Libertarianism ☠ LiveJournal ☠ Lonely ☠ LoveShy ☠ Mai Waifu ☠ Mass Shootings ☠ Men's rights activism ☠ Minecraft ☠ MLP Forums ☠ MMORPGs ☠ MGTOW ☠ MUDs ☠ My Little Pony ☠ My Tiny Dick ☠ Nice Guyism ☠ Nu metal ☠ Oculus Rift ☠ Oh Shiternet ☠ Online dating ☠ Online sex games ☠ Overwatch ☠ Plastic Crap ☠ Plenty of Fish ☠ /r9k/ ☠ Rick and Morty ☠ Roblox ☠ Rule 34 ☠ RuneScape ☠ School Shootings ☠ Second Life ☠ Self-Victimization ☠ Shy Boys IRL ☠ Silk Screen Goku Shirt ☠ Slayer ☠ Slipknot ☠ Sluthate ☠ Smogon University ☠ Social Justice ☠ Source Filmmaker ☠ South Park ☠ Sparkalloon ☠ Speakonia ☠ Star vs. the Forces of Evil ☠ Steven Universe ☠ Taking the Internet Too Seriously ☠ Team Fortress 2 ☠ That Guy With The Glasses ☠ The Anytown Show ☠ The Entersphere ☠ The Sims ☠ They Might Be Giants ☠ Tomb Raider ☠ Tool ☠ Transformers ☠ Tulpas ☠ Tumblr ☠ TV Tropes ☠ twenty one pilots ☠ Uncharted ☠ Uncle Grandpa ☠ Uncyclopedia ☠ Undertale ☠ Unikitty ☠ UTTP ☠ VidLii ☠ Virginity ☠ Virtual Youtubers ☠ Vloggerheads ☠ WatchMojo.com ☠ Weezer ☠ Wikimania ☠ Wizardchan ☠ World of Warcraft ☠ YIIK: A Post-Modern RPG ☠ YouTube

MylarBalloonFan is part of a series on Aspies. [Back to your happy placeSperg out]

Academy Maniacs • Adam Lanza • Albert Einstein • Alexander Slavros • Amber Buttrum • Andy Kaufman • Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto • Aspies for Freedom • Aspierations • Assburger • Baldi's Basics • Bambifan101 • Barron Trump • Bart-Toons • Beefrave • Benny_the_Snake • Benthelooney • Ben Shapiro • Bill9929 • Bill Gates • Blocklanders • BlueCatRiolu • BodyXPolitic • BonziWORLD • Boris Malagurski • Bourg Productions • Bram Cohen • Brandon Smith • Brownsquirrel • Cameron W. Cowan • Cansin13 • Chibiyima • Chris-chan • Chris Harper-Mercer • Clay Claymore • Cyndilovespiccolo • Dan Cilley • Darr • Darius McCollum • Darviela Maravarona • David Clegg • DaxFlame • Dellor • dev-catscratch • Diogo Mendes • DisneyFan01 • DLAbaoaqu • DodgerofZion • Dragonfan • drp1zza • Eddie Wise • EdenHeroineGirl • Elliot Rodger • EmpLemon • Erik Ribsskog • Erin Anthony • Evan Gragg • Flaglerchat • Flardox • Fucklewithshuckle • FUNImation2002 • Gachatards • GalaxyRailways2199 • Gary McKinnon • Geoshea • Glitchedblood • GoFags • GrantM • Graykat • Greg Mazujian • Greenyfags • Hannah Capps • Heed My Warning • Hozupindahows00s • Inmendham • Inuboy1000 • Ironholds • Jack Gilbert Graham • Jared Milton • Jahi/4444 • Javi Suzumiya • JINXDROWNED • Joeker • John Patrick Rogers • Joseph8276 • JustinandDennis • JustinRPG • Joey The Autist • Keegan Salisbury • Kawaii Kitsune • KawaiiKittee88 • Kelseyalicia • Kevin Havens • KingMasterReview • Kirbyslover • Kloeri • Kongzillarex619 • Kothorix • Kphoria • Lane Davis • LeafyIsHere • Logo Kids • Lordelthibar • Lougara • Lukas Pietsch • Lyndsay Kirkham • Lynn Ann • M. Chaos • Manlytears • Mar9122 • Marcus Potter • MarioMan7890 • MarioMario456 • Mark Zuckerberg • MascotGuy • Matthew Davis • Matthew Nicholson • MDetector5 • Michael Gimson • Minefags • Misha Silenosti • Missy • Mix Hyena • Monica Punk • Mumkey Jones • Mutescream • MylarBalloonFan • Nate Spidgewood • Nemo Hana • Neuro • Nichole337 • Nick Bravo • Nicky Reilly • Nikolas Cruz • Objectcucks • Olinkalex • Onigojirakaiju • Onyx Forepaw • Pacificoceanasia • PhantomStrider • Phonefags • PMDrive1061 • Popcorn • Prince Jeremy • Randy Stair • RavenNG • Robert Clark Young • ROtards • Rootbrian • Ross Lumbus • Ryan • SammyClassicSonicFan • SaturnDOS • Sebastien Levesque • Seunghwan Lee • Selery • Shane Lee • SiriusOrionis • SolidMario • SONYFANBOY • Spergin • Starblade • Starkiller88 • SteAndKel • SuperMarioLogan • Super Minecraft Kid • Tablecow • TGcomix • TheAmazingAtheist • TheDOSFag • The Eclectic Espeon • The rEactor • Theme Park Review • TheMysteriousMrEnter • Therealagerbon • The Juggernaut • The Unknown Autobot • TheVeganStudent • Timbox • Toby J Rathjen • ToKeN • Tom Serson • ToonEGuy • Tosh • Trigglypuff • TylerthDragon • Ulillillia • Vailskibum94 • Varg Vikernes • Waymuu • WeatherManKevin • WeDoALittleTrolling • Weegeeisgoingtokillm • Werechu • Wetflame • willg8686 • William "AlGore" Atchison • William Freund • Wim Crusio • WolfAdvocate • Wolfeedarkfang • wwwarea • You • ZS3

MylarBalloonFan is part of a series on
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MylarBalloonFan
is part of a Series on
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Notable Autists:

Mr.A.T.AndreiThomas ♦ Bourg Productions ♦ Erik "Tazman" Mokracek ♦ Lord Foxworth ♦ MylarBalloonFan ♦ ValisHD ♦ SonicStrife ♦ SomePrickNamedMemphis



Related Crap:
Roblox ♦ Battle for Dream Island ♦ Asperger's Syndrome ♦ BitView ♦ Zippcast ♦ Moonman

Featured article May 11 & 12, 2013
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