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Jew Hat: Difference between revisions
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<!--[[File:Dog-Hasidic-Jew-Hat-FEB-28-20101.jpg|thumb|150px||[[YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG]]]]--> | <!--[[File:Dog-Hasidic-Jew-Hat-FEB-28-20101.jpg|thumb|150px||[[YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG]]]]--> | ||
[[File:Coat of arms of judenburg, austria.png|thumb|right|180px|The coat of arms of Judenburg, Austria, featuring jew hat]]<small>''Not to be confused with: [[Yarmulke]]''</small> | |||
[[File:Coat of arms of judenburg, austria.png|thumb|right|The coat of arms of Judenburg, Austria, featuring jew hat]] | |||
The '''Jew Hat''' or '''''Judenhut''''' is a cone-shaped pointed hat, often white or yellow which has in recent times become something of a 'little black dress' for {{hover|<s>elitist</s>|They're ALL elitist}} [[hipster]] kikes. | The '''Jew Hat''' or '''''Judenhut''''' is a cone-shaped pointed hat, often white or yellow which has in recent times become something of a 'little black dress' for {{hover|<s>elitist</s>|They're ALL elitist}} [[hipster]] kikes. | ||
==History== | ==History== | ||
[[File:001-judenhut-m-kugelspitze01.jpg|thumb|A Jew Hat depicted last Thursday.]] | [[File:001-judenhut-m-kugelspitze01.jpg|thumb|A Jew Hat depicted last Thursday.]] | ||
[[File:Judenhut.jpg|thumb|Reinforced, handy for stonings]] | [[File:Judenhut.jpg|thumb|200px|Reinforced, handy for stonings]] | ||
[[File:Medieval talmud debate jews.jpg|thumb|Jew hat parade]] | [[File:Medieval talmud debate jews.jpg|thumb|200px|Jew hat parade]] | ||
<!--[[File:Jewhat.jpg|thumb|left|250px|How it all went down]]--> | <!--[[File:Jewhat.jpg|thumb|left|250px|200px|How it all went down]]--> | ||
''The below account is [[wikipedia:Richard_I_of_England#Anti-Jewish_violence|100% factual according to TOW]].'' It should also be noted that '''King Richard the Lionheart''' wasn't just anti-semetic but was also rather fond of [[Crusades|pwning Moslems]]. | ''The below account is [[wikipedia:Richard_I_of_England#Anti-Jewish_violence|100% factual according to TOW]].'' It should also be noted that '''King Richard the Lionheart''' wasn't just anti-semetic but was also rather fond of [[Crusades|pwning Moslems]]. | ||
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==Jew Hats Through The Ages== | ==Jew Hats Through The Ages== | ||
<br> | |||
<!--[[File:Jewhat.jpeg|thumb|150px|[[facepalm.jpg]]]] | <!--[[File:Jewhat.jpeg|thumb|150px|[[facepalm.jpg]]]] | ||
[[File:Got jew hat-p148193310231582715qj0i 400.jpg|150px|thumb|NO!]] | [[File:Got jew hat-p148193310231582715qj0i 400.jpg|150px|thumb|NO!]] | ||
[[File:Epic_jew_hat.jpg|thumb|150px|YES!]]--> | [[File:Epic_jew_hat.jpg|thumb|150px|YES!]]--> | ||
{{cg|✡| | {{cg|[[✡]]|jewhat|center|<gallery perrow="4"> | ||
File:JudenMitHut.jpg | File:JudenMitHut.jpg | ||
<!>File:Juden_hut.jpg</!> | <!>File:Juden_hut.jpg</!> | ||
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File:Judenhut-in-augsburg.jpg|Withdrawing [[gold]]s at Ye Olde [[ATM]]... Trés chic! | File:Judenhut-in-augsburg.jpg|Withdrawing [[gold]]s at Ye Olde [[ATM]]... Trés chic! | ||
<!>File:Judenhute.jpg<!> | <!>File:Judenhute.jpg<!> | ||
</gallery>}} | </gallery>|border=gold}} | ||
==See Also== | ==See Also== | ||
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*[http://maps.google.com/maps?hl=en&safe=off&client=safari&rls=en&q=%22judenhut%22&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&tab=wl Where to get one] | *[http://maps.google.com/maps?hl=en&safe=off&client=safari&rls=en&q=%22judenhut%22&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&tab=wl Where to get one] | ||
{{jews}} | {{jews}} | ||
<br> | |||
[[File:Jew_hats_in_hell.jpg|center]] | |||
<br> | |||
[[Category:IRL Shit]][[Category:In Jokes]][[Category:Drama-generating techniques]][[Category:Fandom Stuff]] | [[Category:IRL Shit]][[Category:In Jokes]][[Category:Drama-generating techniques]][[Category:Fandom Stuff]] | ||
Revision as of 05:18, 24 August 2017
Not to be confused with: Yarmulke
The Jew Hat or Judenhut is a cone-shaped pointed hat, often white or yellow which has in recent times become something of a 'little black dress' for elitist hipster kikes.
History
The below account is 100% factual according to TOW. It should also be noted that King Richard the Lionheart wasn't just anti-semetic but was also rather fond of pwning Moslems.
Although now highly fashionable, the Jew Hat wasn't always so cool; not for Jews that is. Invented at least 900 years ago in Medieval England by epic Jew ha(t)ter King Richard the Lionheart to separate the Jews from the Gentiles (since dropping trou wasn't really practical), the Jew Hat was akin to the yellow star Hitler (who totally stole from the idea from the Pope around the Spanish Inquisition) made the Jews wear in Nazi Germany.
Good King Richard had decided that his coronation was to be a guy's only affair and made a proclamation banning Jews and wimmins. Since most wimmins are easily detectable, there was no problem there, but the Jews...what to do about the Jew? Richard decided that a yellow hat with a circumcised knob on top would do the trick and made another proclamation making the Jew Hat compulsory for the Jews.
So far so good. The only problem was, that some brown-nosing money lenders decided to sneak in anyway to curry favour with the new king and upon arrival were easily spotted by their Jew Hats and Richard's courtiers stripped and flogged the Jews, then flung them out of court. Richard then ordered all Jews to be killed and the people of London began a massacre. Many Jews were beaten to death, robbed, and burned alive and Jewish homes were burned down. Several Jews were forcibly baptised.
Since having sex with Jews in Medieval Times was also deemed illegal -and thus unsafe- the Jew Hat often doubled as a Jimmy Hat or a strapon.
Today
However, much like it now being cool for black people to wear gold chains, the Jew Hat is back baby! And the Jews are claimin' it and representin' donning the Jew Hat as a fashion statement. In your face King Dick! If you're a Jew, you should go out and get one now. It will make the wearer magically appear appealing and attractive to the ladies since it denotes that you have plenty of Jew Golds to lend at very reasonable rates.
Jew Hats Through The Ages
See Also
External Links
