Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Hypno

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigationJump to search

Back in the days of Pokémon Red and Blue, when the Psychic-type reigned supreme and raep'd everything in its path, there was simply no excuse for not having a Psychic Pokémon on your team. Why, with the ability to tear their enemies minds apart through psychokinetic power, you'd be stupid not to have one - motherfuckers got their shit stabbed the fuck up if they didn't. That was just how people rolled back then, you get me?

Readers are advised to avoid looking directly into Hypno's eyes.

But while it was common to see Trainers packing an Alakazam or a Mewtwo, there was one Psychic-type that you seldom saw anybody using: Hypno.

And there was a very good reason for that.

Biology

 
An artist's impression of the creature.
   
 
It carries a pendulum-like device. There once was an incident in which it took away a child it hypnotized.
 

 
 

—The chillingly vague Pokédex entry for Hypno, which seems to raise more questions than it answers.

   
 
Not popular with girls because of its attitude. Can often be heard muttering to itself in a low voice.
 

 
 

—Another sinister factoid from Hypno's Pokémon card.

   
 
Carries a pendulum with it always. Sometimes appears near less-traveled roads and schools at dusk.
 

 
 

Chris Hansen would doubtless like to capture this Pokémon.


Jew Hypno is the 97th Pokémon in the Pokédex and the evolved form of Drowzee.

A strange, disturbingly human-like, bipedal creature with yellow skin, cruel, slitty eyes and a prominent, beaky nose, Hypno has an odd appearance even by the standards of some of the other weird shit you see in the Pokédex. The creature invariably carries a pendulum in its left (or, sinister) hand, although no explanation has been given as to where it acquired such an object. Indeed, there is precious little information known about Hypno.

What is known, however, is that Hypno are able to use the power of hypnosis to put their victims to sleep and then feast upon their dreams. If they're not so lucky, it is likely certain that Hypno will then devour their innocence. And then their flesh.

Because of this, some Pokémon Professors argue that there may be some link between Hypno and another creature that preys upon children, although this has yet to be proven.

Hypno's Lullaby

 
 
Come, little children,

Come with me.

Safe and happy, you will be.

Away from home, now let us run,

With Hypno, you'll have so much fun!

Oh, little children, please don't cry.

Hypno wouldn't hurt a fly!

Be free to frolic, be free to play,

Come with me to my cave to stay.

Oh, little children, please don't squirm,

These ropes, I know, will hold you firm.

Now, look to me, the pendant calls

Back and forth, your eyelids fall.

Oh, little children, you cannot leave.

For you, your families will grieve.

Minds unravelling at the seams,

Allowing me to haunt their dreams.

Do not wail and do not weep.

It's time for you to go to sleep.

Little children, you were not clever,

Now you'll stay with me forever...
 


 

Gallery

Pleasant Dreams... About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

See also

Not to be confused with

Hypno is part of a series on
 
UnV& Pedophiles [-+]

Aaron WilliamsAdam LanzaAlenonimoAlison RappAmber ButtrumAndy MaherAngryjediAnimatedJamesBeefraveBikerfoxBill CosbyBritbongCamHeadCasey AnthonyChaosscizzorsColonel McBadassComicalityCyraxxCyril SmithDan SchneiderDoomentioDr DisRespectDreamDrossRotzankDaddyOFiveDahvie VanityDangermanDeekerDidaskalosDynacatlovesmeEric RidenourErik MöllerFergie OliverFrank BonafedeGreg MazujianGreville JannerG-ZayGeosheaGalaxyRailways2199Harrison DigfootHumonHypnoHunter MooreIrish282Isabella Loretta JankeJames Terry Mitchell JrJaSonicJerry Peetjervaise brooke hamsterJimmy SavileJoey NigroJohn Patrick RogersJoseph KonyJustin BerryJustin DabrowKaitlyn HuntKatherine MarionKyle PerkinsLena DunhamLeonard F. Shaner Jr.LittleCloudLtFlaggerLogansperman2Lucian HodobocM. ChaosMagicrichMandoPonyMar9122Michael JacksonMikevirusMatrooko11MZMcBrideNathanrNeil FoxOmegaloreOnideus Mad HatterOnisionPaul WalkerPennywisePurple AkiPutridRalph SquillaceRiverman72Roger SampsonSam DeathWalkerSam RassenfossSarah ButtsShane LeeSibeScientologySethistoSmartschoolboy9Sophie LabelleTheAmazingAtheistThomas Watt HamiltonTimboxTrap-kunTyciolUncle GrandpaUpdownmostlyViolentacrezVonHeltonWoody AllenW. T. SnacksYandereDevYoung Tubers UnitedYtaskZeitgueist

Related Topics [-+]
 

Hypno
is part of a series on Pokémon

[Gotta catch ’em all!Who’s that Pokémon?]
 
A FUCKING POKEMON
Abra
 
Aggron
Aggron
 
Alakazam
Alakazam
 
Bidoof
Bidoof
 
Blastoise
Blastoise
 
Braixen
Braixen
 
Charizard
Charizard
 
Cloyster
Cloyster
 
Ditto
Ditto
 
Empoleon
Empoleon
 
Empoleon
Espeon
 
Garchomp
Garchomp
 
Gardevoir
Gardevoir
 
Hypno
Hypno
 
Jynx
Jynx
 
Jigglypuff
Jigglypuff
 
Kadabra
Kadabra
 
It's a Kirby, retard
Kirby
 
Koffing
Koffing
 
Lanturn
Lanturn
 
Cunnilingus
Lickitung
 
Lopunny
Lopunny
 
Lucario
Lucario
 
Lugia
Lugia
 
Metapod
Metapod
 
Mewtwo
Mewtwo
 
Mistystuffer
Misty
 
Mudkip
Mudkip
 
Twitch Plays Pokemon
Omanyte
 
Pikaman
Pikaman
 
Pokemon Go
Pokémon Go
 
Swirlface
Poliwhirl
 
Porygon
Porygon
 
Primeape
Primeape
 
Probopass
Probopass
 
JustinRPG
Reshiram
 
Riolu
Riolu
 
FUCK_YEAH_SEAKING
Seaking
 
Shaymin
Shaymin
 
Shiny Pidgey
Shiny Pidgey
 
Slowpoke
Slowpoke
 
Smugleaf
Smugleaf
 
Snorlax
Snorlax
 
Snover
Snover
 
Squirtle
Squirtle
 
Suicune
Suicune
 
Vileplume
Vileplume
 
Xatu
Xatu
 
Zoroark
Zoroark

Hypno is part of a series on Creepypasta

[2spoopy4meScared?]
 

Hypno is part of a series on

Television

Visit the Television Portal for complete coverage.