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Mario 64 Iceberg

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Around the end of summer 2020, some Nintendofags decided to make one of their favorite baby games EVEN MORE "mysterious" and "weird". How did they do this you ask? Simply put, they did some drugs and came up with some ideas on the purpose of unused game assets, promotional materials and unimportant details already in the game. They then posted their genius ideas on /v/ and /x/. They range from unused dancing flower textures sharing resources with those of lava bubble to the Hazy Maze Cave being Peach's Castle's septic system, no seriously. And that's not even the worst of it.


The Image in Question

   
 
The human mind never ceases in its journey to find patterns in objects in which there are none
 

 
 

The Surface Level

This is the shit almost all people who have played SM64 know about, nothing all that ground breaking or weird for that matter either. Regardless it is the duty of the fine folks here at ED to catalogue this information.

  • L is real 2401: a stone plaque texture in SM64 and a few other N64 games, which some have also read as Eternal Star. This means either A) a date on when the game will unlock Luigi, B) the release date of some other game coming out around that time or C) some requirement needed to be completed in game to unlock Luigi. Long since been debunked.
  • Whomp's Fortress Tower 1up: a hidden extra life in said tower. Some claim that the location of it was different for them.
  • Spaceworld 1995 Beta: a beta version of the game from Nintendo's Spaceworld 1995 event.
  • Parallel Universes/Half A Presses: an excerpt from some youtubers SM64 ramblings, became such an overused joke the maker of those videos disavows them.
  • Bob-Omb Battlefield Bridge Hanging/ Impossible coin and Goomba: You can hang on the underside of the first bridge you see in that level, despite how completely useless it is. The impossible coin/goomba refers to objects placed within terrain that the player cannot access without hacking.

The Middle Section

Some more obscure shit about the game, also not a very interesting part of this iceberg. Some points of information will be compressed from here on for your reading ease.

  • Big Boo Unused Text/Ghoul medal/Don't become his lunch/Big dud/Please walk quietly in the hallway: These all pertain to either unused text or unexplained in game text; the first two have to do with Big Boo's Haunt level. "Don't become his lunch" refers to a sign about the friendly dinosaur in Hazy Maze Cave. "Big Dud" was a line one of those pink bob-ombs say after you defeat King Bob-omb. "Please walk quietly" is a sign on the second floor of the castle that says just that.
  • Dancing Flowers/Bugged Fire Textures/Yoshi's Saddle/JRB Vanishing Fog/ET in Pyramid: All of these have to do with in game art assets; the dancing flowers texture occupies the same areas of code as the lava bubbles leading some to believe these flower textures were removed from some level. The fire textures are coded wrong and don't appear right. Yoshi's saddle is missing the white siding that is usually on it. The fog on Jolly Roger Bay disappears permanently after you collect the first star there. There's a texture in the hieroglyphs in the pyramid in Shifting Sand Land leading some fans to believe this is a refence to aliens building the pyramids in Egypt.
  • Secret Aquarium/Whomp King turns into the castle/Volcano Blocks/HMC Aclove/JRB Box: These deal with aspects to one particular level usually shit that anyone with a brain would notice, this continues the trend that 95% of this is just filler with the other 5% being the really out there shit you've been seeking; the Secret Aquarium is a level in the game that you access for a secret star or it can refer to clipping through one of the aquariums on display in the same room. When you fight the Whomp King on his level he says that Whomps are used to make roads and houses, this has lead to some theorizing that upon his death he became the tower in later stars on that level. Volcano blocks are just decorative blocks in the volcano that reside within Lethal Lava Land. The HMC alcove are cave outcrops where the player can climb up to plot out there next moves in the poison filled maze, that somehow a lot of people don't utilize while playing. The JRB Box is a box on the pirate ship in Jolly Roger Bay that is unbreakable and has some really bizarre collision properties.
  • Blargg/Unagi's Tunnel/Yellow Cap Switch: More in game stuff that ended up unused; Blargg is an unused model for a SMW/Yoshi's Island enemy which would have appeared in Lethal Lava Land it has no textures associated with it but otherwise functions somewhat when hacked into the level. Unagi's Tunnel refers to an inaccessible tunnel near Unagi the Eel in the level he appears in. The Yellow Cap Switch is the unused yellow cap switch which would have turned on the yellow boxes that would give the player rideable Koopa shells.
  • Mirror Room/MIPS Throwing/Broken Paintings: The Mirror Room refers to the room with the giant full sized mirror and how there is a door in it that doesn't exist on the normal side. MIPS the rabbit was going to be able to be throwable but that feature was cut due to time constraints or may refer to the trick of using the rabbit to clip through doors to access things you're not supposed to yet. Broken paintings refers to the copies of portal paintings outside of the first room you encounter them in that don't work, probably placed there as decorations.

The Bottom

This is where the truly crackpot ideas come out for all to see.

  • Haunted Dirt Textures/Big Boo's Haunt Forest/Big Boo's Secret Laugh/120 Spiritual Significance: One of the dirt textures used is said to have an anguished face in it, and that makes it haunted somehow? If BBH is inside a bird cage then where is the forest around it? Spoiler: its the grass around the cage. The "secret" laugh is a variation of the normal laugh that will randomly play upon doing certain actions in BBH. The number 120 which is the total star count for the game can have any number of vague spiritual or esoteric meaning just like every other number in existence.
  • WDW Skybox/Zelda 64 beta assets in WDW/True locations of painting worlds/Skyboxes are Photos: WDW Skybox is an edited photo of a real place. There are assets for textures/models in Wet Dry World that would go on to appear in Ocarina of Time. Do the paintings exist as links to real locations in Mario's world? Some argue they do such as Whomp's Fortress being a level in Mario Galaxy. WDW's skybox is a photo which leads some people to think the others are too.
  • Yoshi Commits Suicide: I guess the IRS finally caught up with him, Rest in Piss Yoshi.
  • Super Mario 64 is Freemason Initiation: The year is 1996, Nintendo had just struck a deal with the Freemasons to embed secret code into the game along with some not so secret symbols in specific areas of the game with the goal to bring children around the world to become Freemasons, and in exchange Nintendo gets something out this, your guess is as good as mine.

Dark Waters

We must go deeper....

  • Hazy Maze Cave Shit: Is the entrance to it a sewer? Is the poison gas actually farts and the giant boulders giant mounds of shit? The world may never know.
  • Toads are Trapped in Walls/The Bowser Room: At the start of the game one of the toads say everyone is trapped within these walls, some have taken this literally as Bowser using his magic to turn all the Toads into bricks like in the original Super Mario Bros.; The Bowser room refers to a faked screencap from some lets play youtube.
  • Forbidden Door: Refers to the door in the mirror room and whatever lies behind it.
  • July 1995 Beta Build: Supposedly haunted and cursed beta build of the game from July 1995 that you're not to research under any circumstances.

THE ABYSS

THIS IS IT LUIGI

  • Miyamoto stole the idea of SM64 from Argonaut: Argonaut was developing a 3D Yoshi game which supposedly played and felt a lot like Mario 64 and pitched their idea to Nintendo and Shigeru Miyamoto. They turned it down and later on Super Mario 64 came out and the Yoshi game Argonaut was developing ended up being remade as Croc.
  • Sequel was cancelled due to temporal leakage: Time shit the bed again and that's why you didn't get Super Mario 64 2/Super Mario 128.
  • Lavender Town and Polybius were coverups for Mario 64: These two gaming Creepypastas as well as many others were conceived by Nintendo in the years after the release of Mario 64 so people would focus on anything but the VERY REAL things involving Super Mario 64.
  • Shared Nightmares: It has been reported that avid Mario 64 players all have similar nightmares involving this game, why you may ask? Well let's just take a look at Nintendo's top secret hidden code....

The Godlike Super AI Made in 1996

Every copy of Super Mario 64 is personalized with the help of the in-game AI, which analyzes at first the player's skill, preferences towards levels, which in game goals they complete and other such relevant data. After a while the game will begin to introduce changes to the game, that are very mundane such as reducing fall damage the player receives. It may occasionally introduce sudden minor changes to catch the player off guard to measure and analyze their reactions to better calibrate itself. Eventually the game is unrecognizable from a fresh copy with new levels, enemies and powerups generated from the Internal Plexus of the castle, which is the "core" of Mario 64's code and AI. Now you may be wondering, how come you don't see any of this when emulating? The AI can only be activated by real N64 hardware with an N64 cartridge containing your region's SM64 ROM. Due to some faulty hardware, some may not be able to use the personalization AI even back at release date. How any of this electronic wizardry was accomplished in 1996 we may never know.

TL;DR

All of this is just "did you know gaming: Mario 64 edition" with some gay Creepypasta ARG shit thrown in for the lulz to confuse people on what's real or not.

Gallery

See also


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See {{Pokedex}} and {{Sonic}} for moar faggotry.

Consoles

Nintendo Entertainment SystemSuper Nintendo Entertainment SystemGame Boy AdvanceVirtual BoyNintendo 64GamecubeNintendo DSWiiWii UNintendo Switch

Games & Characters

Advance WarsAnimal CrossingBanjo KazooieBilly Hatcher and the Giant EggBombermanBuck BumbleCastlevaniaChrono TriggerConker's Bad Fur DayContraDigimonDonkey KongDuck HuntDuckTalesEarthBoundFinal FantasyFire EmblemKirbyKingdom HeartsLegend of ZeldaMarioMario PaintMegamanMetroidMike Tyson's Punch OutPhoenix WrightPikminPokémonProfessor LaytonQuest 64Shaq-FuSonic the HedgehogSplatoonStar FoxStreet Fighter 2Super Smash BrosSuperman 64TetrisWarioWii Fit

Miscellaneous

3DSPlazaAmiiboBowsetteCan't let you do that, StarFox!Digibutter.nerrFalcon PunchFantendoIs This BattletoadsIt's a Kirby, RetardHaunted Majora's Mask CartridgeHong Kong 97Hotel MarioKing Dedede Drooling While EatingKirbyraegKrystal Can't Enjoy Her SandwichLINK MAH BOIIIIILuigi's Death StareMiiverseMushroom Kingdom FusionNintendoLifeReggie Fils-AimeSmogon UniversitySolid Snake's AssSuper Mario 64 IcebergTriforceWhat is a man?Yoshi Art ForumsZeldaOnline

Featured Article October 22 & 23, 2021
Preceded by
The Backrooms
Mario 64 Iceberg Succeeded by
Castlevania