Plushie

Plushophile at play.

	“	Fucking real animals? Woah, Don't get your hopes up. We're furries, remember?	„
	—Unknown

Holy Christ, you thought there was something wrong with furries? Well, this tops it. Take your fave stuffed animal, give it a "Strategically Placed Hole" (fake vagina) and/or "Strategically Placed Appendage" (fake penis), then FUCK it. Take care to avoid legal hassles though...

Yep, this is the basic idea of the plushie scene. Too damn cheap for a RealDoll, and so fucked up that even most furries think they're weird. This qualifies as a hindering paraphilia, specifically a fetish. One day it will be added to the DSM, and liberals will lobby for its removal 10 seconds after it comes off the printing press.

Teddy bears, rabbits and dolphins are all fair game, but plushophiles apparently have a special place in their heart for Meeko, the raccoon from Pocahontas. Since these toys have been discontinued, plushophiles will spend large amounts of money from their job at McDonald's to acquire one. The reasoning? "It's the expression on his face."

You should troll the living shit out of these sick fucks. They need it.

Plushie Psychology 101

	“	No plush lover will ever leave you, cheat, lie, or betray you, break your heart, give you a disease, or hurt you in any way.	„
	— Lontra, Right you are, dumbass!- because they are INANIMATE OBJECTS that you're PROJECTING onto...

A sex toy designed just for them.

There really isn't anything complicated at work here.

The entire phenomenon can be expressed as "Loser" + "Horny" = "Fail".

Dubious disclaimers and grandiose rationalizations from adherents aside, the larger part of the plushie persona is simple garden-variety arrested development. Rather than face their ongoing failure to find a human mate, they retreat to the happier times of childhood, when life was less challenging and stuffed animals were their BFFs. Sort of like adult thumbsuckers (but with cum, piss and lube thrown in the mix).

Possibly the most annoying aspect of these miserable, pathetic losers is the fact that they attempt to portray their mundane, horndog social ineptness as a "lifestyle choice," in order to cloak themselves with the same mantle of legitimacy that homosexuals receive. A casual review of the real-life pictures of these dorks makes it clear, however, that they fuck stuffed animals because they don't have any other choice.

Series Le Skunk

Wait, does that skunk have a dildo? About missing Pics

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  You know, you could probably do this with other furries, but, fuck it.

Their sexual practices: sick and wrong

	“	To me, giving my gift of love to my plushies is a sacramental act.	„
	— Lontra

Gabe Newell is also a practitioner of plushophilia

In 2001, a plushfag named FoxWolfie Galen took it upon himself to be the Alfred Kinsey of his pathetic sub-sub-subculture and conducted a very scientific survey on his website about plushies sexual preferences and practices. 80+ plushies responded with typically shameless candor, and their answers provide a queasy glimpse into this cesspool of human fail. Among other things, we learn:

• Responders were mostly male (66). One was "shemale".
• Responders mostly didn't care what "gender" their plush is. "Male" was the next most popular response.
• Pictures of people fucking their stuffed animals were the preferred form of plushie pr0n.
• "Realistic" plushies were preferred to "anthropomorphic" or "toony".
• The crotch and mouth of the plush are the most popular areas to aim cum and piss at.
• Strategically Placed Holes are much preferred to Strategically Placed Appendages. Allegedly.
• Most plushies are willing to share their toys with others and would use someone else's plushies if they knew they previously had sex with them.

...and many other sickening things.

If you suspect you've been poisoned and need to vomit quickly (or are pro-ana and have lost your gag reflex), the whole survey may be read here. Please be advised, though - you can't UNread it afterwards...

Gallery

Toys R Us is better than playboy... About missing Pics

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  PLushies would totally subscribe to this
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  You will need eye bleach after watching this...
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  True story.
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  Oh, for fuck's sake...
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  What would Christopher do…

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  Trying to pretend this isn't sick
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  Teddy babes gone wild
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  A typical plushie 4-way.
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  Centipedes not included.
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  FAPFAPFAP (Srsly, if this turns you on, please kill yourself.)
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  The fact that this one looks rabid would not deter these sick fucks in the least.
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  A typical plushy orgy.
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  Besides fursuits, plushies like to make adult-sized sleepers.
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  the red lips and hair extensions totally make it furry and not bestiality fantasy
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  Here's one with boobs. You'd hit yiff it.
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  I wanna fuck you like a stuffed animal.
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  Those aren't Battletoads.
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  Aw man, I KNEW it! Alf's a fag!!1!
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  A full-time failure at life yiffing his hawt bitch.
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  Disturbing picture of a 38 year old plushie attempting to mimic that "Meeko" smile looks more like a furry Juggalo
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  Best $300 ever!
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  That is fucking disgusting.
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  As is this

Other ED pages with Plush-pervs

• Furry-Furry
• David_Hockey
• JohnOfE
• ShadoWolffess
• Wolfeedarkfang

See Also

• Furry
• Yiff
• Objectophilia
• Strategically Placed Hole

External links

• The reason why a Plushie convention should be held in an underground nuclear test chamber in New Mexico.
• How To Custom Tailor Some Sweet Plushie Poon.
• Here is a place to troll. Get a free account and have a good time!
• Here's another place to troll.

Plushie is part of a series on Sex Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage.

Plushie is part of a series on Furfaggotry Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage.

Featured article June 18 & June 19, 2011
Preceded by Rule 34	Plushie	Succeeded by Cosplay

[Give $500 PlzOpen Up to Us]

Plushie is part of a series on Psychology