Aediot

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Aediot
Powerword	Jacob Stellmach
Current Status	Napkins Shitted
Time As Sysop	Dec 2019 - September 2020
Kiwi Farms Thread	Ass Napkins

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Aediot (Powerword: Jacob Stellmach^✡) also known as Pæperclip, and Ass Napkins is the latest addition to the list of the Disgraced Encyclopedia Dramaticians in addition to being a hustler who gives new meaning to being a "skid".

Aediot was known for being an incompetent and petty fuck who was unable to keep the wiki up and running for a single day and throwing his admins under the bus by constantly blaming them for his inability to keep the wiki up for an hour. Having only run ED for 8 months, Jacob managed to fuck up the site entirely and get kicked out of the ED community for AIDS and fail

Previously, Jacob had started his worthless ED career at the tender age of 17 sometime in 2014 under the pseudonym of Pæperclip. In less than a year, Paperclip was banned from the wiki and forums for being an autistic sperg and retard. Aediot was exposed for being a pedo and was relentlessly mocked about it until he ultimately ragequit.

He showed back up in 2020 with a new name and a new lady, Zaiger's ex-girlfriend Adezero, about half her age Jacob was dumped by ade for being a couch surfing bum not worth of a moist tight vagina such as hers he then manipulated a BPD mentally ill Scott Pilgrim girl he met on the forum, Ade went on to not have sex with Ethan Ralph. Under Ade's tutelage, Jacob promised to bring back ED to its glory days and more! He promised paid jobs for writing articles and taking down the enemies of the lulz. It was almost too good to be true. SPOILER: It was.

Buckle your seat belts and prepare yourself for a bumpy ride that includes child pornography, hustling, BPD whores, attempting to take down ED, incompetency, ass napkins, etc.

Previous Antics and other Epic Fails

Onionland and the Dark Web

2ND RESULT ON BING

Jacob constantly identifies himself as a "darknet researcher". Jacob tries to leverage these claims to have le 2spooky4u informations about the scary seedy criminal underworld of Tor. It's safe to assume that "darknet researcher" really means "cp enthusiast" so there's no reason to be afraid of him online or IRL. He's not some 1337 hax0r and really just a skid, which is evidenced by his inability to keep a website like ED online and functional.

	“	Recently Anonymous launched OpDarknet, basically what happened was someone in the collective noticed a large amount of CP in Onionland and contacting the main hosting provider (Freedom Hosting) proved fruitless in removing the content so they took it down themselves.	„
	—Jacob refused to remove child porn so anonymous had to step in [1]

Prior to this, Jacob had "allegedly" run a tor hidden service site called Onionland, known online as a den of child porn, and who knows what else.

This section of the article is known to cause Jacob severe butthurt. Do not waste any time reminding him about Onionland for maximum lulz. He will insist and deny that the articles are incorrectly characterizing him, they aren't. Every single fact is always checked by teams of cute kittens.

Xerxes

Sometime during the crypto boom in 2018, Jacob had a short-lived cryptocurrency that was an obvious pyramid scheme. Jacob attempted to scam some money off investors with outrageous promises, but like everything else Jacob does, the ICO failed miserably and likely cost more than he ended up making. Before the scam ever blossomed into a beautiful shit napkin, Jacob deleted everything before he got anally pounded by the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission

	“	A blatant Ponzi scheme ICO: xerxescontract.io is a high-yield investment programme, literally promising 200% annual returns. Where do they get these remarkable sums of money? Vague and nonspecific “arbitrage”, which was literally what Pirateat40 claimed for his 2012 Bitcoin Ponzi. They have an ICO for initial buy-in. I searched on the names and photos in the white paper and was actually surprised not to find the usual string of prior fraud convictions.	„
	—David Gerard on Xerxes

Hypernova Group

Jacob runs a pyramid scheme where he pretends to be a black guy named Aedonis Bravo where he tries to scam dumb niggers out of money by paying off sponsor tweets from Black Twitter shills, this may be how he pays for his weed and Adderall

The Hustler's Bible

Jacob "The Hustler" Stellmach self-published a $150 "self-help" book called "The Hustler's Bible" (not to be confused with "A Hustler's Bible", a book written by a nigger that actually succeeded in life). It is ironic to attempt to sell a $150 book about succeeding when you can't manage to fix your own broken wiki before getting b& by its own community. His shitty website for his book is currently down, which means that it's no longer even purchasable.

As "CEO" of Encyclopedia Dramatica

A quick pump n' dump m'dear

Jacob declares himself CEO of ED despite no one knowing who the fuck he is outside of having some shady internet history. Jacob even went as far as filing paperwork incorporating it despite never writing an article himself. Jacob proceeds to be unable keep the site up more than a week at a time, gets sued because he has a "company" around ED, spends all day on Twitter and gets 2 retweets, makes his own forum only to have bots as users, and fucks a heroin junkie's ex twice his age. Jacob isn't just a junkie for weed and Adderal, he's also addicted to epic fail. Later on Jacob gets kicked out of Adezero's house after his refusals to leave, so he proceeds to ban her from everything.

After growing impatient ED was not gaining him the ultimate streetcred moderators of ED involved in a criminal conspiracy, promising to teach them how to open lines of credit in other peoples names, and how to take down any WordPress site that was deemed "enemies of ED". Why he thought anyone would fall for this I'll never know, it could be the weed or ADHD medication abuse but Jacob "Secondhand Zaiger" Stellmach didn't stop there because he then notified the same user that he would be selling the site to one of his dark web friends and not tell anyone about it, out of fear for it affecting donations he expected to receive for the lawlsuit against him.

	“	I REGISTERED ON KIWI FARM TO SEE THIS SHIT UNFOLD AND I GOTTA ADMIT, EVEN THO ADZERO LOOKS LIKE ALF MIXED WITH THE CLEANING LADY ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER FUCKED ON THE DOWN LOW, AND GOT TITTIES SHAPED LIKE LOW MOISTURE MOZZ, I GOTTA GIVE PROPS TO AEDIOT FOR GETTING LAID WITH NAPKINS STUCK INTO HIS ASSHOLE.... SOMEWHERE DEEP DOWN THERES A CHAD MOVE HIDDEN THERE LOL	„
	—Assblonker

Plans to sell out ED

HIS COCONUT GUN About missing Pics

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  "After this lawsuit ends I'm transferring ownership"
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  "It's either splinter the retards or pony up law fees forever"
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  "You think Oddguy can run the wiki?"
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  "We have to fight it, it's retarded
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  "Do you think I need to declare I'm leaving"
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  "Counsel on what level"

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  Trust me, I'm a cat

As an Enemy of teh Lulz

Jacob filing an abuse report against dramatica.online's host in an attempt to try and take down ED

• Promised numerous backups, instead prevented others to do such things, causing the Restoration 2020 program to be bigger than ever (Thanks, kike.)
• He did remove the porn ads for a bit, but it was to advertise his scam shitty book
• Tried to fuck the ED jannies balls deep, as previously mentioned
• Tried to sell ED to his favorite Dark Web loli.
• Attempts to get us kicked off our host

Final Chapter (November 22, 2020)

After the criminal conspiracy came to light, as well as everyone being sick of his inability to run the site, a new site was created and online in less than 12 hours, something that had taken Jacob weeks of posting about and crying about on twitter saying he had teams of people working and was costing him thousands of dollars was done in half a day by 1 person.

There was no power struggle, no threatens to sue, no splitting of the community, Jacob is still living in his delusional world that HE is the CEO of ED and it's HIS wiki that is the real wiki and "will be up any day now guys I promise" but he forgot that NO ONE owns ED and in this case, ED owned him.

Current Status : Still a Faggot (as of March 14th, 2021)

On March 13th, 2021 UMK, Adezero, and Kaizen had a meeting with Conrad, the Sysops that got vanned prior to AEdiot's usurpation. To no one's surprise, Conrad declared himself for team win and stating that .online was the one true ED. UMK & Kaizen in turn told Conrad that he was welcomed back once he got out of Bubba's cell. Conrad also alleges that he trademarked ED before Aediot filed for his. Making Aediot's version a complete and total sham and a colossal waste of time, money, and effort for himself and the entire ED community.

The Great Ass Napkins Saga

Imagine making your girlfriend pick this up every day

Aediot declaring victory after she never posted in his thread.

On this lovely day on April 27, 2021, Aediot posted another thread on Kiwi Farms whining about the ED Discord and his ex-girlfriend in an attempt to try to threaten and intimidate her into silence, since Adezero was allegedly giving TOP SECRET INFOS to the ED community about his plans to trademark Encyclopedia Dramatica. His diabolical plan to get the farms to make fun of her by posting dox and nudes completely blew up in his face, as Adezero would later reveal that Aediot uses napkins to collect his anal seepage, which he would leave around her apartment, and make her pick up regularly. This stunning revelation derailed his plan and the thread turned into over 100 pages of the Kiwis clowning on and brutally roasting Aediot, establishing him as a lolcow.

In his own defense and a sad attempt to garner sympathy, Aediot claimed that he has to shove napkins in his ass due to his fecal incontinence due to rape. Allegedly his dad raped him in the ass as a toddler. However, his ex-girlfriend has stated that the most likely reason for his incontinence, is that he has taken miles of hard dicks in his stretched out asshole.

	“	Lmao the ass napkins No it's a medical thing due to being raped at a young age. I don't really care who knows about it it's not like it's a quirk I enjoy or anything If that's the best ammuniton Ade can provide then I've already won tbh	„
	—Aediot taking the "I was raped" defense

Unsurprisingly, his measly attempt to cope and defend himself only increased the absolute flaming KF was giving him by tenfold.

Later on, the independent, strong woman Putrid would post on the thread, embarrassing herself in front of EDF and KF users alike, getting shat on by both sites, in a desperate attempt to gain attention and to also get Mr. Ass Napkins to have sex with her.

Two days after the thread got started, it was temporarily locked by Kiwi Farms' moderators, due to the sheer amount of shitposting and lulz that has come straight out of EDF's userbase, driving the jannies and regular KF users insane. The next day the thread was unlocked culminating in massive lulz.

Gallery

IF HE SHOOT YA About missing Pics

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  Aediot on the subject of him not being able to set up a forum

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External Links

• aediot.cash - His gay personal website.
•  7Deadly7ins - His Twitter. Banned.
•  AEmenace - Now with more edge.
• Aediot - His TOW account
• Jacob Stellmach - Go on, hire this fag to write for you.
• KiwiFarms Thread - Probably the most epic self-0wn so far this decade.
• Jacob's GoFundMe he planned to use to pump and dump the wiki with.
• EDF Thread #1510 "ASS NAPKINS"
• Twitter Thread - Owning The Libs By Telling An Autistic 12 Year Old To Suck Your Dick
• Xerxes on wayback

See Also

• Anti-lulz - What Jacob is
• Ariel Rose Sapeda his sysop who ran the "official ED twitter" and plugged her onlyfans at every opportunity
• Restoration 2020 - DO YOUR PART FGT!
• Disgraced Encyclopedia Dramaticians - The full list
• Skid - Zero Day WordPress Exploit moment!
• The Cancer Killing ED
• 𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝕵𝖊𝖜𝖘 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝕿𝖍𝖊𝖎𝖗 𝕷𝖎𝖊𝖘
• Zaiger420 - His role model

Aediot is part of a series on Enemies of the Lulz

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	Aediot is part of a series on Taking Down ED [Retreat!Do It Faggot]
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Aediot is part of a series on the former regimes

Corporate Shill Branch Girlvinyl • Jacknstock • Killhamster • Pink Poodle • Sheneequa • Thedreadedkettle • Zaiger • Conrad Alan Rockenhaus • Aediot • Umkemesik • MarioMario456 Unwitting Pawn Branch Blu Aardvark • BURK • Crazyconan • Ed Lolington • kale • Kazantzakis • Onideus • OtterWhiskers • Quasidan • Riboflavin • Schnookums • Tfo • ShardDax • vanff • Vermin • wattage • weev • WKD • WhiteMystery • Zenophile Angry Patriot Ghost Branch AlGore • Andrewpants • OldDirtyBtard • Rubberduc • yiri See Also Encyclopedia Dramatica • Epic Battle • Joseph Evers • MysteryBot • OhInternet • Sellout • Sheneequa Turns Four • The War of Zaiger Aggression