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Spam

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is an old revision of this page, as edited by imported>Cobaltcat at 11:37, 17 July 2014. It may differ significantly from the current revision.
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Explanatory diagram
I'm so sorry to hear about that, sir
   
 
My name Merike i girl ,im search friend, send me messages [email protected] i send me foto:)

bvkap zgfhj slnbm
 


 
 

LOLWUT

Spam is a delicious processed luncheon meat product that your mom cooks with fucking everything. Spam is also a legitimate form of advertising and a multi-million dollar industry that everyone loves to hate. Spam had its origin when authors like Alexandre Dumas were paid by the word to publish novels so they would be of superior quality. Most spammers make an honest living out of reposting the same quality content over and over again, ad infinitum, you know, until people really get the picture. Sadly, some people invoke actual wire, mail, and e-mail fraud laws to severely abuse these humble public servants simply trying to get the word out about their new methods of curing erectile dysfunction. Some, however, spam with malicious intent on forums and message boards. Those people are huge cunts.

Don't knock it. It's got its own key. Hormel Foods Corporation, the makers of spam, have revealed future revisions of their spam would use the latest in 128-bit public encryption technology for the cans, as the traditional key is insecure, especially as it is included with the can.

Three great characters to spam on board with character limits on their posts are the following : ፼ (U+137C), ₔ, and  (U+E366) (seriously, those are three single characters) because they are hueg liek Xbox and will allow you to cover more page area with the small character limit.

Costs of Spam

To quote TOW, The European Union's Internal Market Commission estimated in 2001 that "junk e-mail" cost Internet users €10 billion per year worldwide. It was estimated at least 100 years ago that spam cost Internet users $3.85 per can worldwide.

Why spam other people?

File:Traitors1.jpg
You know what's coming
  1. Why the fuck not?
  2. For the lulz
  3. Revenge is a dish best served with sauce
  4. It’s a fun way to start a day.
  5. It’s a clean way to get revenge.
  6. If you like sending chain mails you will love doing it with spam!
  7. The best way to get a lot of visitors to your website.
  8. To advertise your shitty product.
  9. It's the most formal way to get your point across.
  10. Because all the pretty cool kids are doing it.
  11. Because you are bored.
  12. Because you are a respected, cool, fun to be around person.
  13. Because you are a furry.
  14. Because you are a troll.
  15. Because you have no life.
  16. Because your girlfriend cheated on you.
  17. Because you love it.
  18. Because you love Tl;dr threads.
  19. Because you can.
  20. Because you can't.

People who spam

Your typical spambot
  • Nigerians
  • Pharmacies
  • Kimmo Alm
  • Your bank
  • Your mom
  • Your alcoholic dad
  • GNAA
  • Scientologists
  • Bible sellers
  • Penny stock sellers
  • Online/mail-order colleges
  • Dating sites
  • Cam whores
  • Muslims
  • Spambots
  • Billy Mays - Now he's fucking dead, but they "aggressively advertise" in his honor.
  • Tahko
  • YOU

Spamalot?

   
 
Spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam WONDERFUL! spam spam spam spam BEAUTIFUL! spam spam spam spam...
 

 
 

Monty Python

If That's Not Enough to Make You Kill Yourself...

GALLERY-O-SPAM About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

See Also

Spam is part of a series on Language & Communication
Languages and DialectsGrammar, Punctuation, Spelling, Style, and UsageRhetorical StrategiesPoetryThe Politics of Language and CommunicationMediaVisual Rhetoric
Click topics to expand
Spam is part of a series on Usenet. [CollapseExpand]
[RecessionInflation]
£€ Spam is a part of a series on Money
Companies

AdFlyAdobeAmazonAppleAT&TBDICBellBitcoinBurger KingCelestial ToystoreComcastCostcoDisneyDuckDuckGoeBayEthereumFox NewsGNWTGoogleHappy Madison ProductionsIBMIKEAMicrosoftMcDonald'sMTVNew Media RockstarsNintendoNovellOracle CorporationPatreonPayPalSonySun MicrosystemsT-MobileVerizonViacomWal-MartWikiaYahooYouTube

People

Bernie MadoffBill GatesChad HurleyGregory KohsHal TurnerJewsJimbo WalesKlaus SchwabL. Ron JeremyLarry SangerLyor CohenMario LaudicinaMartin ShkreliSteve ChenSteve Jobs

Ideology / Politics

AusterityBailout PlanCapitalismCommunismGlobalisationGovernmentGun controlHealth Care RageIceslaveJudaismKarl MarxObamacareRon PaulAyn RandRandroidSocialistRonald ReaganWelfareZeitgeist MovementZeitgeist - The Movie

Selling

AdvertisingBitcoinBriberyExtreme AdvertisingBilly MaysPorn AdvertisementsShamwowSpamSubservient ChickenWinnebago ManGeorge Zimmer

Topics

419 Nigerian Email ScamsThe Dot.Com BubbleEconomistEconomyForeign GirlfriendInternet moneyJew GoldMoneyNFTsPoorProfitRape dollarsScientologyToilet Paper HoardingUnlimited disposable income


Spam
is part of a series on Web 1.0

    [BACK TO THE FUTUREANCIENT HISTORY] 

Old Memes  • Celebs, h4x0rz, and Phreaks  • Technologies  • Fun and Games  • Events  • Death of Web1.0
Click topics to expand

Spam
is part of a series on
Food and Drink

[BleurghOm Nom Nom]