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ChildLine: Difference between revisions

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[[File:ChildLine-Logo.jpg|thumb|right|Happy phone is happy.]]
[[File:Childline-logo.jpg|thumb|right|Happy phone is happy.]]


{{Stub}}
{{Stub}}
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ChildLine is a [[British]] support line for [[13 year old boys|children]] who're getting [[raped]] or [[falcon punch|abused]]. It is also a rip-off of [[Chris Hansen|Dateline NBC]] except not as lulzy. Unless you really like prank phone calls or you [[retard|keep dialing the wrong number]], then you qualify for the 99.99% who actually call up because you're getting your ass kicked by mummy or daddy. Take note of the person on the other end sighing constantly, as it proves what many are thinking, [[Nobody Cares|NOBODY FUCKING CARES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]]
ChildLine is a [[British]] support line for [[13 year old boys|children]] who're getting [[raped]] or [[falcon punch|abused]]. It is also a rip-off of [[Chris Hansen|Dateline NBC]] except not as lulzy. Unless you really like prank phone calls or you [[retard|keep dialing the wrong number]], then you qualify for the 99.99% who actually call up because you're getting your ass kicked by mummy or daddy. Take note of the person on the other end sighing constantly, as it proves what many are thinking, [[Nobody Cares|NOBODY FUCKING CARES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]]
It was founded before the internet by horse-toothed hellhag Dame Enid Rancid, host of [[BBC]] light entertainment spacktacular ''That's Life!'', who nevertheless failed to spot [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2218389/Esther-Rantzen-fears-Jimmy-Savile-sex-scandal-destroy-ChildLine-legacy.html the world's biggest pedo] when he was right under her nose the whole time.


==Ways to [[Troll|Help]] ChildLine==
==Ways to [[Troll|Help]] ChildLine==
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*Ask where hitler sent the jews
*Ask where hitler sent the jews
*Ask the use of sex toys and where you can aquire them
*Ask the use of sex toys and where you can aquire them
*Go "urh-urh-urh-urh, now then, now then, guys and gals" until the operator cries




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==See Also==
==See Also==


*[[Jimmy Savile|Sir Jim'll]]
*[[Child Abuse]]
*[[Child Abuse]]
*[[Chris Hansen]]
*[[Chris Hansen]]
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*[http://www.childlinerocks.co.uk/ Their fail of a concert to raise awareness of child abuse.]
*[http://www.childlinerocks.co.uk/ Their fail of a concert to raise awareness of child abuse.]
*[http://www.charities.co.uk/childline-charity.php Cool charity bro.]
*[http://www.charities.co.uk/childline-charity.php Cool charity bro.]
*[http://www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ChildLine Wikipedia thinks it knows childline.]
*[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ChildLine Wikipedia thinks it knows childline.]
*[http://apps.facebook.com/childline/ ChildLine trying to appeal to a broad audience.]
*[http://apps.facebook.com/childline/ ChildLine trying to appeal to a broad audience.]
{{Pedoseries}}
{{Pedoseries}}
{{Britfags}}


[[Category: Stub]]
[[Category: Stub]]
[[Category: Drama-generating_techniques]]
[[Category: Drama-generating_techniques]]

Latest revision as of 18:28, 15 December 2016

File:ChildLine-Logo.jpg


ChildLine is a British support line for children who're getting raped or abused. It is also a rip-off of Dateline NBC except not as lulzy. Unless you really like prank phone calls or you keep dialing the wrong number, then you qualify for the 99.99% who actually call up because you're getting your ass kicked by mummy or daddy. Take note of the person on the other end sighing constantly, as it proves what many are thinking, NOBODY FUCKING CARES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was founded before the internet by horse-toothed hellhag Dame Enid Rancid, host of BBC light entertainment spacktacular That's Life!, who nevertheless failed to spot the world's biggest pedo when he was right under her nose the whole time.

Ways to Help ChildLine

File:Img 0436 childline-rocks.jpg
Don't worry, the sagely words of the many people at ChildLine will calm you down.
  • Call up saying you're actually Madeleine McCann
  • Claim you were raped repeatedly by Bubba
  • Phone up saying you know your alphabet, starting with 'A is for Assrape', 'B is for Buttsex' etc.
  • Ask if durex is better than Pasante, then say that your Dad agrees
  • Describe your 'ordeal' in way which is similar to the Holocaust and ask why your nose is so fucking big
  • Email them saying you 'Do Not Forgive, Do Not Forget' and 'Have over 9000 penises'
  • Ask why daddy has started using the hammer instead of the belt
  • Quote every jail scene from American History X
  • Ask why niggers like KFC
  • Ask where hitler sent the jews
  • Ask the use of sex toys and where you can aquire them
  • Go "urh-urh-urh-urh, now then, now then, guys and gals" until the operator cries


And many, many other ways.

Videos

Chris Hansen is not pleased.

The shitty little advert involving a fucked up doll as a metaphor

What happens if you tell anyone.

What you should be doing...

....and what your dad will do if you don't.

The Best And Harshest Reality

YOU'RE GONNA GET BEATEN





See Also

External Links

ChildLine is part of a series on
UnV& Pedophiles [-+]

Aaron WilliamsAdam LanzaAlenonimoAlison RappAmber ButtrumAndy MaherAngryjediAnimatedJamesBeefraveBikerfoxBill CosbyBritbongCamHeadCasey AnthonyChaosscizzorsColonel McBadassComicalityCyraxxCyril SmithDan SchneiderDoomentioDr DisRespectDreamDrossRotzankDaddyOFiveDahvie VanityDangermanDeekerDidaskalosDynacatlovesmeEric RidenourErik MöllerFergie OliverFrank BonafedeGreg MazujianGreville JannerG-ZayGeosheaGalaxyRailways2199Harrison DigfootHumonHypnoHunter MooreIrish282Isabella Loretta JankeJames Terry Mitchell JrJaSonicJerry Peetjervaise brooke hamsterJimmy SavileJoey NigroJohn Patrick RogersJoseph KonyJustin BerryJustin DabrowKaitlyn HuntKatherine MarionKyle PerkinsLena DunhamLeonard F. Shaner Jr.LittleCloudLtFlaggerLogansperman2Lucian HodobocM. ChaosMagicrichMandoPonyMar9122Michael JacksonMikevirusMatrooko11MZMcBrideNathanrNeil FoxOmegaloreOnideus Mad HatterOnisionPaul WalkerPennywisePurple AkiPutridRalph SquillaceRiverman72Roger SampsonSam DeathWalkerSam RassenfossSarah ButtsShane LeeSibeScientologySethistoSmartschoolboy9Sophie LabelleTheAmazingAtheistThomas Watt HamiltonTimboxTrap-kunTyciolUncle GrandpaUpdownmostlyViolentacrezVonHeltonWoody AllenW. T. SnacksYandereDevYoung Tubers UnitedYtaskZeitgueist

Related Topics [-+]
ChildLine
is part of a series on

The British
The Pride of Britain [-+]
Our Rich Cultural Heritage [-+]
The United Kingdom [-+]